Three Lives Three Worlds Mini-Special (Kids Edition) – Part 14
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Finally, I am posting my beloved mini-special. It is really tough, dividing my limited time between my two guys Feng Teng & Dong Hua, lol. I’ll try to do at least a mini-special a month. Since summer holiday will be over soon, this feature will be mostly on the cute & adorable kids, little dough & Gun Gun. Should I do one on Yan Chi Wu since I am starting to like him very much:P?
One
Little dough is holding the Qingming (Clear Light) sword, “Is this for me?”
Ye Hua: “Give your sister ah!”
Little dough is holding the Kunlun fan, “Then, this is for me?”
Ye Hua: “Give your sister ah!”
Little dough cried till he drown his tiny face and raised his grievance with Bai Qian: “Mummy, father lord doesn’t love A Li anymore. He won’t give me any of the gifts, sob sob..” Bai Qian pointing to her bulging stomach: “Be good ~ mummy will treat her as a gift and give to you, okay?” Little dough asked: “What is this?”
Bai Qian: “Your sister ah!”
Little dough: " 〒 _ 〒”
Two
A Li has reached the age to inherit a weapon. In the end, should I inherit father lord’s Qingming sword or mummy’s Yuqing Kunlun fan. This is a tough choice.
Little dough: “Father lord, give the Qingming sword to me.”
Ye Hua: “Good son, with this sword, you can become the next War G.o.d in Jiuchongtian.”
Little dough: “Mummy, give the Kunlun fan to me.”
Bai Qian: “Good son, with this fan, you can blow anyone you dislike far far away.”
Little dough: “Uh, I roasted a chicken but the fire is not strong enough so I need to chop some firewoods and fan some wind to add more heat.”
Ye Hua and Bai Qian: “…..”
Three
Little dough: "Mummy! I am doing my homework but I don’t know how to answer a question.~"
Bai Qian: "Ask your father lord."
Little dough: "Father lord, I don’t know how to answer a question.~"
Ye Hua: "Ask your grandpa Dong Hua."
Little dough: "The question is: We should call Dong Hua Dijun (A) Brother or (B) Uncle or (C) Grandpa?"
Ye Hua: "……"
(Little dough, you should call him uncle … but your father also calls him uncle …… arrgh the confusing position in the family hierarchy is once again misleading the little kids ~)
Four
Gun Gun: "Father lord …… you are helping mummy to do homework but…why are you not helping me…?"
Dong Hua: "Because your mummy is too stupid, so she cannot finish her homework."
Gun Gun (abandon his pride to become shameless): "Gun Gun … Gun Gun is also stupid …"
Dong Hua: "No, although your mummy drags down your IQ, it is still above average."
Feng Jiu: "…"
Five
Feng Jiu: "Dijun …… whose schoolwork are you doing?"
Dong Hua: "Little royal great-grandson’s one."
Feng Jiu (surprise): "Dijun, when did you start to have a conscience?"
Dong Hua: "…"
Feng Jiu: "Could it be that A Li gave you some benefits? What can he give ar …"
Dong Hua (Of course, Dijun is not going to repeat the original words): "He said that if sister Feng Jiu's IQ is at least half of brother Dong Hua then she can help him do schoolwork. After hearing someone said that you have low IQ, I am very pleased."
Feng Jiu: "…"
A few days later.
Little dough: "Brother Dong Hua … sister Feng Jiu is angry with me!"
Donghua (leisurely fishing): “Oh, why?”
Little dough: “Brother Dong Hua, did you purposely want to bully A Li …… did you feel unwilling to help A Li do homework … A Li, A Li clearly did not say that sister Feng Jiu is 555 (dumb).”
Dong Hua: “…”
Little dough: “Brother Dong Hua has deceived A Li … A Li… A Li …”
Dong Hua: “What you gonna do?”
Little dough (start to cry): “A Li is not going to call you brother anymore lah …”
Dong Hua: “…”
(A Li dear, if you really call him grandpa, don’t ever think he is going to help you do schoolwork anymore …)
Six
Bai Gun Gun (looking pitiful): “Uncle little dough ~ ~ ~”
Little dough (looking sincere and earnest): “Gun Gun, why are you so sissy, if you are not careful you will have a wretched life.”
Gun Gun (biting his fingers): “Sissy, just like Uncle Xiao Yan, that kind of dainty appearance?”
Little dough: “Correct ah! Your mummy does not like sissy. She will refuse to accompany you to sleep. You need to be a little more valiant and manly, just like me!”
Gun Gun: “Okay! In order to sleep with mummy, I will go home now and eat up all the rice that I didn’t eat!”
Little dough: “What does this have to do with eating ar?”
Gun Gun (confused): “Didn’t you just said I should be like you ar? But, but, I'm not, as fat as you, oh no, it should be round.”
Little dough: “. . . . . ”
Seven
Gun Gun and little dough are sitting in the courtyard and looking at the stars.
Little dough: “Recently, my father lord is increasingly excessive, occupying my mummy’s time the whole day!”
Gun Gun (worried look): “My father lord also.”
Little dough (waving his two small fists): “We have to find a solution! Thus, after the two have discussed over it, they decided to - first cry, two throw tantrum and three hang oneself.”
The next day, late at night. Only Gun Gun is sitting in the courtyard and looking at the stars. So what actually happened that night?
Little dough cried ——Ye Hua: “Crying is useless.”
Little dough threw tantrum—— Ye Hua: “Throwing tantrum is useless.”
Little dough hanged himself ——Ye Hua: “Okay, just let you this once.”
Gun Gun cried ——Dong Hua: “Crying is useless.”
Gun Gun threw tantrum ——Dong Hua: “Throwing tantrum is useless.”
Gun Gun hanged himself —The outcome is he hanged himself, but half way through he climbed down.
Feng Jiu: “What if he really hanged himself, then how?”
Dong Hua (expressionless): “Do not worry, Xiao Bai, he will definitely climb down.”
Eight
Yan Lang: "Mum and dad, how was I born?"
Qin Mo (look calm): "Pick up from the roadside."
Yan Long (look indignant): "You are talking nonsense! Zhou Yue Yue clearly told me because both of you slept together!"
Qin Mo:" …"
Yan Song: "…"
Little dough: "Mummy and father lord, how was I born?"
Bai Qian (forced laugh): "… this question, is indeed, very deep …"
Ye Hua (look calm): "It is your mummy who gave birth to you."
Bai Qian: "……"
Gun Gun: "Mummy and father lord, how was I born?"
Feng Jiu (look distress and stare at Dong Hua): "… Well … Well … How to explain this?"
Dong Hua (look calm and talk rubbish): "Pop out from the inside of a stone."
Feng Jiu: "……"
Nine
Little dough: "Recently I feel very troubled. Father lord always does not let me sleep with mummy."
Su Chen: "Recently I feel very troubled. Father lord always makes me feed Xiao Huang (tiger)."
Gun Gun: "Recently I feel very troubled. Father lord always makes me eat the sweet and sour fish he cooked."
Little dough (sympathetic look): "…."
Su Chen (sympathetic look): "…."
Ten
New School Year's Resolutions
Su Chen: “Study hard and improve every day, strive to become a wise ruler in the future!”
Yan Lang: “Strive to improve the gene I inherited from my mother to get good result for my language test!”
Feng Jiu: “No matter what, also must successfully steal the magical Saha fruit!”
Little dough: “Strive for mummy to change my name and compete with father lord for the right to sleep with mummy."
Gun Gun: "Strive for mummy to pay more attention to me and do not need to eat sweet and sour fish."