The Sweet Girl Graduates Part 5

_Maude_ "The magnitude of the common things about us."

_Miss R._ Touch "common things" more lightly; "of the common things about us,"--"common things."

_Maude_ (takes a sprint). We cannot realize the magnitood--tude--of the "common--" oh, dear, I can never say it!"

_Miss R._ Yes, you can. You are doing well,--remarkably well.

_Maude_ O Miss Rantum!

_Jack_ You are, honest Injun! It'll be dandy.

_Miss R._ Please read,--are you tired standing?

_Maude_ (dismally). No,--I got to get it.

_Miss R._ Please read that second paragraph--sentence--again.

_Maude_ (taking a brace). Among life's bright flowers, its rugged slopes--

_Miss R._ R-r-r-rugged slopes.

_Maude_ Rugged slopes.

_Miss R._ No, r-r-rugged slopes. Trill your "r."

_Maude_ (flatly). I can't.

_Jack_ What's the use? I don't think she need. People only do that on Decoration Day. "Br-rave, r-rugged heroes," you know.

(Enter Katherine.)

_Katherine_ Miss Maude, a letter from you--for you, I mean. (Hands one in awestruck manner and escapes.)

_Jack_ That girl is scared to death at anything that looks like writing.

Did you see her?

_Miss R._ (leaning back in her chair). Is she of foreign extraction?

_Jack_ No, foreign distraction.

_Maude_ (falling into a chair and opening letter). From Valeria. She can't come over this afternoon. She's got to, to--I can't make it out.

(spells slowly). B-a-an, B-a-n--

_Jack_ Banana, maybe. She's got to banana. Let me see it, I'm used to her hand.

_Maude_ Indeed! (elaborately). Indeed, you are! Maybee this is your note?

_Jack_ You needn't get so mad. Let her banana. I don't care!

_Maude_ (springing up). Neither do I! Take the note!

(Katherine appears at the door.)

_Katherine_ (in much trepidation). Perfesser Grindem.

_Jack_ (pleasantly). All right Katherine, we are perpared!

(Enter Professor Grindem.)

_Grindem_ (bows profoundly, repeatedly). Ah, good morning, ladies, good morning! Mr. Hamilton, ah, good morning! How is the work progressing?

(Jack shakes hands. Miss Rantum bows distantly.)

_Maude_ (tearing note into tiny bits). I shall be scared to death.

_Grindem_ (cordially). Not at all, Miss Maude, ah, not at all! Not at all! You will feel power,--power is ahem!--power is a great thing--a great thing.

_Maude_ (dejectedly). Yes, Professor.

(Enter Mrs. De Smythe)

_Grindem_ May I hear the--ah, Mrs. De Smythe, good morning!

(Mrs. De Smythe adjusts herself on couch.)

_Mrs. De S._ Yes, Maudie, dear, read it all to us. O Matilda, Matilda, my salts! Now, Maudie!

(Miss Hoppenh.o.e.r bustles in and takes her station behind couch.)

_Maude_ (painfully taking "position"). "Life's Inner Meanings."

_Mrs. De S._ A very pretty subject, I think.

_Miss H._ (sniffs). A very pretty broad one, I think!

_Maude_ (impressively). "Life's Inner Meanings."

_Miss R._ Stand straighter, Miss Maude--so.

_Jack_ I think that's awkward,--looks as if she were going to cry "Lay on, Macduff!"

_Maude_ Why, Jack Hamilton!

_Mrs. De S._ Jack's only joking. Why don't you go on?

_Maude_ "Life's Inner Meanings," (then, very rapidly). "As a traveler among the mighty mountains, fails to realize the height to which he has climbed, so we, in Life's dusty pathway, cannot estimate the distance we have traveled. Among life's bright flowers, its rugged slopes, its pleasant walleys--valleys, its dangerous pitfalls, we cannot realize the magnitood--tude--magnitude of the common things about us." (Stops, breathless.)

_Miss R._ Don't sway so. Hold the body firm.