The Strategy Of Washing Clean A Slag Shou Chapter 28

The Prince's escaped fiancée (Arc 2-11) Part 1

Clearly, Jing Cheng and Su Yang have very different definitions for the word ‘bully'.

When the whole topic inexplicably swerved to the R18 category, Su Yang was calm. He was composed. He most definitely did not lose his cool!

The system: “Stop your legs from shaking first….”

Su Yang: “As I've said, physiological responses are out of my control.”

I'm obviously still an innocent baby, how can I be exposed to such adult rated content? I really want to leave a bad review!!

He turned around indignantly and began thumping Jing Cheng's chest with a soft little fist, insisting in a righteous tone, “No, you're not allowed to bully me!”

The strength of his punches was comparable to that of a little girl's. Jing Cheng did not stop him, and even seemed to enjoy it.

“Why can't I bully you?”

Su Yang's bright eyes darted around evasively. He dithered for half a day, seemingly unwilling to spit out an answer. In the end, he caved in and said hesitantly, “Because you like me a….”

His tone was timid, full of uncertainty.

Jing Cheng couldn't hold back a chuckle. He tilted Su Yang's chin up, lifting his brows as he asked, “When did I ever say I like you?”

Never…..

Su Yang's face slowly turned red. His eyes glimmered with tears as he stared at Jing Cheng miserably. He was the very picture of a little puppy who had been cruelly abandoned by his owner, with a small tail swishing dejectedly, hoping that a kind person would take pity on him and give him a home.

——To win the tyrant's sympathy, acting spoiled and cute is the way to go!

Jing Cheng was. .h.i.t with a face full of cute. His mind buzzed as he felt a strange warmth in his nose.

{T/N : Nosebleed lol lol}

System prompt: Current progress 42%.

Su Yang was startled. This-this, what kind of strange fetish is this!

Jing Cheng pinched his nose. He held Su Yang in the crook of his arm as he said “I certainly like you, which is why I want to bully you even more.”

Su Yang pretended not to understand, and answered in his foolishly innocent way, “But Mother said, if you like a person, to be nice to them, don't ever bully them!”

“Those are your Mother's beliefs, not mine,” Jing Cheng sneered. “In my domain, the person I like must suffer, and made to cry, and they must never be allowed to leave my side in their entire life.”

What kind of brutish logic is this! Su Yang shivered as a chill ran down his spine. Help, someone save me from this strange uncle!

{T/N: Strange uncle is also a slang for pedophiles}

Jing Cheng smiled gently, “It's alright if you don't understand now, one day you will understand.”

Su Yang: “……”

I really don't want to understand, alright!

After regaining his freedom, Su Yang was now faced with a second major crisis—– to defend his chast.i.ty!

He was a bundle of nerves for a good number of days, but Jing Cheng did not seem to be in any hurry. The man continued to shamelessly take advantage of Su Yang, petting and teasing him as usual, but did not overstep the limits. It appeared that he was patiently waiting for Su Yang to ‘grow up'.

If one had to pin a description to it, it would be akin to a gardener painstakingly cultivating a one of a kind rare flower, watching over it, watering and fertilising and removing pests, occasionally sniffing the bud's scent and kissing its petals, sparing no effort in this extraordinary care. Simply the epitome of patience.

But it is clear that the day the flower blossoms, it would not escape the fate of being plucked.

Jing Cheng is the patient gardener, and Su Yang is the flower that will be plucked.

Even in his dreams, Su Yang could see himself pressed down beneath Jing Cheng's body, doing unspeakable things. When he woke up with a start, he found Jing Cheng silently gazing at him with an unfathomable look in his eyes.

They say that men are like wolves in their 30s and tigers in their 40s. Jing Cheng is currently in his early thirties. At this age when he is full of youthful vigor but had to repress himself, how would he fare in the long run? Su Yang would like to express that he was sorry for Jing Cheng, but he placed greater importance on his own survival, and so he decisively closed his eyes and went back to sleep. Jing Cheng was left to struggle with insomnia till dawn.

This must be what a love-hate relationship is like!

At first light in the morning, Jing Cheng left for the office of the Ministry of War again. Recently, the hostilities at the South China Sea have been escalating. The situation was tense, to the point where some of the news even managed to filter through to Su Yang, who was generally ignorant of worldly affairs.

Right now, in the entirety of Greater Ming, only the Róng Wáng Jing Cheng, and the Great General Wu Xingde, have the capability of leading their troops to war.

Wu Xingde was devoted and loyal to the Emperor, there was no way the Emperor would allow him to leave the Imperial City. He feared that once Wu Xingde stepped out of the city, Jing Cheng would come marching in from the rear to seize the throne.

But Jing Cheng has been back from the Northern Desert campaign less than half a year ago. If he were to deploy Jing Cheng out to the South again before his men even had a chance to rest and recuperate, Jing Cheng may very well refuse. It may even cause the soldiers and officers that Jing Cheng had rallied to his side to be resentful of the Emperor as well. 

As of now, there really is no one capable of forcing Jing Cheng's hand. Unless the man volunteered himself, no one could coerce him.

Early summer has arrived. The sun grew more blisteringly hot as the days pa.s.sed, but Su Yang wore two to three layers of outer garments every day.

It's not that he didn't mind the heat. It's just that there was a handy anti-sunstroke suitable-for-summer device clasped on his wrist—- the Tianshan Xuansuo, providing you with 24 hours air conditioning, clean and environmentally friendly, the must-have commodity for home or travel use.

At that time, he had felt that it was odd when Jing Cheng had unfastened the chain from his wrist without a fuss. Turns out the Tianshan Xuansuo's main essence lay in the bracelet instead of the chain. As for this una.s.suming looking silver bracelet, after having worn it for so long, he discovered that his body temperature was much lower than the average person's.

But it was marvelous to have in the summer, like a mini portable air-con, keeping him cool and fresh.

Su Yang crouched down and tossed out some fish food at the edge of the pond. When the shoal of carp came rushing up, he quickly picked up the fish net that lay by his side, and, in the blink of an eye, netted himself a few struggling red koi.

He gave a whoop of excitement, “Granny, let's have sweet and sour fish for lunch!”

Granny Wu wiped away her cold sweat, and cajoled him from the side, “Poppet, you can have any fish you want, why do you keep eyeing the koi in this pond. The Wángyé specially ordered for the fry to be transported from Jiangnan, and it took a lot of effort to bring them back alive. If you eat them, the Wángyé is sure to eat you.”

Granny Wu was only trying to scare him, but Su Yang was exceptionally high-strung these days, and his thoughts inevitably landed on a different meaning.

He immediately dumped the fish back into the pond, squatting by the pool looking lost and sad, “You're just like me, no freedom, just being fattened up to be someone's dinner.”

His voice was as low as a mosquito's whine. Granny Wu only thought that he was sulking over not being able to eat the fish, and spoke a few more words to pacify him.

Two maids suddenly came running over from the front yard, calling anxiously, “Wángfēi niángniáng, the Head Eunuch from the Imperial Palace has come, he says he is here to escort you to the Palace!”

Su Yang did not even lift his gaze, “What Head Eunuch, I don't know him.”

However, Granny Wu's expression changed. She exclaimed, “Master, for the Head Eunuch to send for you, it must be that His Majesty wants to see you. Hurry and follow this old slave, we need to change your robes to the court dress before we go.”

Su Yang obviously paid no heed to this. No matter how you looked at him, he was obviously an idiot, and idiots do not understand the rules, much less abide by them. Hence, the Emperor could neither accuse nor punish him for not adhering to the usual rituals and etiquette.

As the last descendant of the Wu family, and also the beloved zhèngfēi of the Róng Wáng, the Emperor would like for nothing more than to see Su Yang topple over dead. With one fell stroke, the Wu family line would finally be broken, and Jing Cheng would also be ruined. Therefore, for the Emperor to seek him out, nothing good lay in store for him. Why would Su Yang rush to serve himself up on a silver platter? He is just faking idiocy, it's not like he was truly that stupid.

{T/N : Zhèngfēi, like Wángfēi, refers to the legitimate wife of the king.}

Su Yang grabbed another fistful of fish food and hurled it into the pond crossly, “Granny, Yu-er doesn't want to see any Head Eunuchs or Majesties. Yu-er wants to wait for Fūjūn to come home.”

His words did not seem to hold any other meaning, but it inadvertently served to remind Granny Wu of something. These days, they are living in the the Róng Wáng's residence. Regardless of whether they harbored any treasonous intent or not, in the eyes of the Emperor, they were already firmly in the enemy's camp. This summons may yet hold a deeper meaning to it.

Granny Wu acted quickly, and called over the little maid who was standing nearby. She whispered softly, “Go look for Deputy General Cao now, tell him to hasten to the Imperial Palace to report to the Wángye. Tell him that His Majesty has ordered for the Wángfēi to be escorted to the Imperial Palace.”

The maid nodded, and left promptly through the side doors.

Granny Wu began to put on a show of persuading Su Yang, “Master, please stop playing, we're wasting time. If His Majesty gets angry, we'll be in trouble.”

Su Yang refused to budge from the edge of the pond. He even took off his shoes and socks and started paddling his white little feet in the water, teasing the fish.

The splashes startled the koi, sending them darting away in all directions.

He continued playing around cheerfully in the water, but the Head Eunuch who came bearing the imperial summons grew increasingly impatient. In the end, he lost his temper and stormed into the rear court gardens. The shadow guards that Jing Cheng had left in place to watch over Su Yang have always been tailing him closely. Upon seeing this sudden intrusion, they appeared in a flash to confront the Imperial martial experts.

{T/N: 大内高手 (Dà nèi gāoshǒu) : Basically these martial experts, unlike those from ‘outside', belong to the Imperial Palace. So it's like a homegrown brand of experts, lol.}

The Head Eunuch sneered, “To defy His Majesty's decree, the Wángfēi niángniáng is truly bold. Do you not know that defying His Majesty is grounds for the Nine familial exterminations!”

{T/N: 诛九族  (Zhū jiǔzú) – The punishment involves the execution of close and extended family members, including the criminal himself. It extends to the criminal's spouse, parents, grandparents, children, siblings and siblings-in-law, grandchildren, aunts/uncles and their spouses, cousins and the spouse's parents}

Su Yang asked innocently, “What is a decree? What is Nine familial exterminations? Why is it Nine, can't it be Eight or Seven?”

The Head Eunuch: “……..”

Granny Wu nearly laughed out loud. Such threats may indeed work on others, but her little Master was well known as an idiot. Even if he was really flouting the rules, the Emperor could not justifiably p.r.o.nounce Tao Ziyu of being guilty of insubordination, lest he be denounced by the common people for bullying a muddle-headed little idiot.

The Chief Eunuch realized this problem as well, and decided against wasting any more words, opting to directly seize Su Yang instead.

The day was growing late, the Imperial Court that Jing Cheng was attending would be adjourning soon. Seeing this, Su Yang said, “Alright, don't fight, I'm going I'm going.”

He sat down and slowly pulled on his socks and shoes, carefully patted the dust from his clothes, and turned around to wave goodbye at the cute little fishies in the pond. Clearly, he has forgotten that not too long ago, these cute little fishies were nearly made into sweet and sour fishies because of him.

Despite Su Yang's best efforts at dawdling and delaying for another hour, by the time he had to leave, Jing Cheng was still not back. Granny Wu kept mopping away the cold sweat from her brow, watching helplessly as Su Yang climbed into the royal carriage.

Su Yang chewed on some candied fruit as he tried to engage the Chief Eunuch in conversation, “Your name is Chief Eunuch? Why is it only two words? My name has three words.”

{T/N: Chief Eunuch in chinese (tàijiàn zǒngguǎn) actually has 4 words, just so you know.}

The Chief Eunuch's lips thinned, “This servant's name is Chen Erbao, it also has three words. Chief Eunuch is my t.i.tle. The Wángfēi niángniáng can just refer to this servant as Xiao ChenZi.

{T/N: 小 (xiǎo) – literally means little. 子  (zǐ) – suffix for children or little things. So it's ‘Small little Chen', but it's not meant to be a cutesy name. Eunuchs in Imperial China are always called Xiao ——Zi. If you've ever watched period dramas and hear someone called Xiao —-Zi, that guy's definitely a eunuch.}

“Oh, so your name is Xiao ChenZi.” Su Yang nodded thoughtfully, then asked again, “Then is His Majesty's real name also Xiao BiZi, or XiaoXiaZi?”

{T/N: This joke was actually a good one, but too bad it's lost in translation. ‘His Majesty' in Chinese is bì xià (陛下). Su Yang, disrespectful critter that he is, basically called the Emperor a eunuch.}

Eunuch Chen: “¥#&¥%”

Su Yang added as an afterthought, “Do you know my Fūjūn? Everyone calls him Róng Wángyé.”

Eunuch Chen answered thoughtlessly in a fawning manner, “Naturally I do. His Royal Highness the Róng Wáng is our Greater Ming's G.o.d of War. From Zhongyuan to Jiuzhou, who has not heard of him.”

Su Yang said happily, “He's very powerful, but his temper is very bad. He's very scary when he's angry. Once, someone accidentally spilled hot water on me, Fūjūn was so angry, he killed the man.”

Eunuch Chen: “…….”

Su Yang's mouth jabbered on, “Do you know what ‘killed' means? Granny told me, killed means dead, gone, finished. Can't eat, can't sleep, and can't talk to others. My Fūjūn has killed so, so many people, too many to count. I'm also scared of him. Xiao ChenZi, are you scared of him?”

Eunuch Chen's foot slipped. Swallowing nervously, he said, “Of course, this servant is scared.”

Su Yang's voice remained innocent and naive, “I know right? There's no one who can defeat my Fūjūn, everyone is scared of him!”

Such meaningful words, the listener would naturally pay heed. In the Imperial Palace, the one who manages to climb to the seat of the Chief Eunuch, would definitely not have a head full of ideals of loyalty. Rather, one would have to be skilled in observing which way the wind blows, with good insight of where the currents of the political situation may turn.

Chen Erbao quickly made his way to the front and had a few words with the carriage driver. The speed of their procession suddenly slowed down significantly.

This could be considered as doing Jing Cheng a favour.

Su Yang quietly breathed a sigh of relief. Life is really full of hardships.

Note: I was mistaken. Apparently, this chapter is a 3 in 1, no idea why, but I will split in in accordance to the raws. Also, I fell sick (still sick), so progress was slower than usual.

Thanks for reading! Also many many thanks to the two Anons for the ko-fi! You guys make my day.

-Syeki

Like what I do? ❤ Buy me a ~ ?