The Skipper and the Skipped - novelonlinefull.com
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"Avast, shipmate!" called the Cap'n, in his best sea tones. The sailor beamed delighted recognition of marine masonry. "The fact of the matter is, my friend here has some claim--the truth is, he's--"
"You go 'long two miles, swing at the drab school-house, and then take the second house--white one--on the left-hand side of the road,"
bawled Ward, "and you go mighty quick!"
The sailor ducked acknowledgment and rolled away.
"If you'd unpinned that mouth of yourn fur enough to tell that tramp that I'm engaged to Pharline Pike," growled Ward, returning to the tree, "I'd 'a' broke in your head--and you might as well know it first as last."
"Ain't you engaged to her?"
"You know I be."
"Well, I've allus told the truth all my life--and I reckon I shall continner to tell it. If you're ashamed to have it knowed that you're engaged to Pharlina Pike, then it's time she heard so. I'd jest as soon tell her as not."
"I started to say to you," raged Ward, "that you'd stuck your finger into my pie altogether too deep. I ain't killed as many sailors as you're braggin' on, but there ain't no man ever licked Gid Ward, and--"
"Near's I can tell from what I hear about you," retorted the Cap'n, "built on racin' lines as you be, you've never let a man git near enough to lick ye."
Again the Colonel noted that red vengefulness in the skipper's eyes, and recoiled suspiciously.
"Oh, my rheumaticks!" the seaman hastened to moan.
Ward had his back to the fence.
"I cal'late as how there's another party that wants his bearin's,"
suggested Sproul.
A rather decayed-looking gentleman, wearing a frock-coat shiny at the elbows, and a fuzzy plug-hat, was tapping his cane against one of the pickets to attract attention.
"I am looking for the residence of Miss Pharlina Pike," he announced, with a precise puckering of his lips. "I'll thank you for a word of direction. But I want to say, as a lowly follower of the Lord--in evangelical lines--that it is not seemly for two men to quarrel in public."
Ward had been gaping at him in amazement.
"I can tell ye right now," he cried, "that Miss Pharline Pike ain't hirin' no farm-hand that wears a plug-hat! There ain't no need of your goin' to her place."
"My dear sir," smiled the decayed gentleman, "it is a delicate matter not to be canva.s.sed in public; but I can a.s.sure you that I shall not remain with Miss Pike as a menial or a bond-servant. Oh no! Not by any means, sir!"
Ward scruffed his hand over his forehead, blinking with puzzled astonishment.
"I'll thank you for the directions," said the stranger. "They were not able to give me exact instructions at the village--at least, I cannot remember them."
"I ain't no dadfired guide-board to stand here all day and p'int the way to Pharline Pike's," roared Ward, with a heat that astonished the decayed gentleman.
"I don't want no elder to go away from this place and report that he wa'n't used respectful," said Sproul, meekly, addressing the stranger. "You'll have to excuse Colonel Ward here. P'r'aps I can say for him, as a pertickler friend, what it wouldn't be modest for him to say himself. The fact is, he's en--"
The infuriated Ward leaped up and down on the sward and shrieked the road instructions to the wayfarer, who hustled away, casting apprehensive glances over his shoulder.
But when the Colonel turned again on the Cap'n, the latter rose and hobbled with extravagant limpings toward the house.
"I don't reckon I can stay out here and pa.s.s talk with you, brother-in-law," he called back, reproachfully. "Strangers, pa.s.sin'
as they be, don't like to hear no such language as you're usin'. Jest think of what that elder said!"
Ward planted himself upon a garden chair, and gazed down the road in the direction in which the strangers had gone. He seemed to be thinking deeply, and the Cap'n watched him from behind one of the front-room curtains.
Two more men pa.s.sed up the road. At the first, the Colonel flourished his arms and indulged in violent language, the gist of which the Cap'n did not catch. He ran to the fence when the second accosted him, tore off a picket, and flung it after the fleeing man.
Then he sat down and pondered more deeply still.
He cast occasional glances toward the house, and once or twice arose as though to come in. But he sat down and continued to gaze in the direction of Pharlina Pike's house.
It was late in the afternoon when a woman came hurrying down the slope through the maple-sugar grove. The Cap'n, at his curtain with his keen sea eye, saw her first. He had been expecting her arrival. He knew her in the distance for Pharlina Pike, and realized that she had come hot-foot across lots.
Sproul was under the big maple as soon as she.
"For mercy sakes, Colonel Gid," she gasped, "come over to my house as quick's you can!"
She had come up behind him, and he leaped out of his chair with a snap like a jack-in-the-box.
"There's somethin' on, and I knowed it!" he squalled. "What be them men peradin' past here to your house for, and tellin' me it ain't none of my business? You jest tell me, Pharline Pike, what you mean by triflin' in this way?"
"Lord knows what it's all about! I don't!" she quavered.
"You do know, too!" he yelled. "Don't ye try to pull wool over my eyes! You do know, too!"
"It's a turrible thing to be jealous," cooed Cap'n Sproul to his trembling little wife, who had followed at his heels.
"I don't know, either," wailed the spinster. "There's one of 'em in the settin'-room balancin' a plug-hat on his knees and sayin', 'Lo!
the bridegroom cometh'; and there's two on the front steps kickin'
the dog ev'ry time he comes at 'em; and there's one in the kitchen that smells o' tar, and has got a bagful of sh.e.l.ls and sech things for presents to me; there's one in the barn lookin' over the stock--and I s'pose they're comin' down the chimbly and up the suller stairs by this time. You're the only one I've got in the world to depend on, Colonel Gid. For mercy sakes, come!"
"What do they say--what's their excuse?" he demanded, suspiciously.
"They say--they say," she wailed--"they say they want to marry me, but I don't know what they've all come hov'rin' round me for--honest to Moses I don't!" She folded her hands in her ap.r.o.n and wrung them.
"I'm pretty nigh scart to death of 'em," she sobbed.
"I reckon you can give 'em an earful when you git down there," said the Cap'n, "when you tell 'em that you've been engaged to her for fifteen years. But it ain't none surprisin' that men that hear of that engagement should most natch'ally conclude that a woman would like to git married after a while. I cal'late ye see now, brother-in-law, that you ain't the only man that appreciates what a good woman Miss Pharlina Pike is."
"You come along, Pharline," said the Colonel, taking her arm, after he had bored the Cap'n for a moment with flaming eye. "I reckon I can pertect ye from all the tramps ever let loose out of jails--and--and when I git to the bottom of this I predict there'll be bloodshed--there'll be bones broke, anyway." With one more malevolent look at the Cap'n he started away.
"It's only a short cut through the maple growth, Louada Murilla,"
said Sproul. "My rheumaticks is a good deal better of a sudden. Let's you and me go along."
As they trudged he saw farmers at a distance here and there, and called to them to follow.
"Look here, I don't need no bee!" howled the Colonel. "This ain't nothing to spread broadcast in this community."
"Never can tell what's li'ble to happen," retorted Sproul.
"Witnesses don't never hurt cases like this."