The School for Scandal Part 9

SIR PETER. Well, but how is Sir Oliver personally to----

ROWLEY. Why Sir I will inform Charles and his Brother that Stanley has obtain'd permission to apply in person to his Friends--and as they have neither of them ever seen him[,] let Sir Oliver a.s.sume his character--and he will have a fair opportunity of judging at least of the Benevolence of their Dispositions.

SIR PETER. Pshaw! this will prove nothing--I make no doubt Charles is c.o.xcomb and thoughtless enough to give money to poor relations if he had it--

SIR OLIVER. Then He shall never want it--. I have brought a few Rupees home with me Sir Peter--and I only want to be sure of bestowing them rightly.--

ROWLEY. Then Sir believe me you will find in the youngest Brother one who in the midst of Folly and dissipation--has still, as our immortal Bard expresses it,--

"a Tear for Pity and a Hand open as the day for melting Charity."

SIR PETER. Pish! What signifies his having an open Hand or Purse either when He has nothing left to give!--but if you talk of humane Sentiments--Joseph is the man--Well, well, make the trial, if you please. But where is the fellow whom you brought for Sir Oliver to examine, relative to Charles's affairs?

ROWLEY. Below waiting his commands, and no one can give him better intelligence--This, Sir Oliver, is a friendly Jew, who to do him justice, has done everything in his power to bring your nephew to a proper sense of his extravagance.

SIR PETER. Pray let us have him in.

ROWLEY. Desire Mr. Moses to walk upstairs.

[Calls to SERVANT.]

SIR PETER. But Pray why should you suppose he will speak the truth?

ROWLEY. Oh, I have convinced him that he has no chance of recovering certain Sums advanced to Charles but through the bounty of Sir Oliver, who He knows is arrived; so that you may depend on his Fidelity to his interest. I have also another evidence in my Power, one Snake, whom I shall shortly produce to remove some of YOUR Prejudices[,] Sir Peter[,] relative to Charles and Lady Teazle.

SIR PETER. I have heard too much on that subject.

ROWLEY. Here comes the honest Israelite.

Enter MOSES

--This is Sir Oliver.

SIR OLIVER. Sir--I understand you have lately had great dealings with my Nephew Charles.

MOSES. Yes Sir Oliver--I have done all I could for him, but He was ruined before He came to me for a.s.sistance.

SIR OLIVER. That was unlucky truly--for you have had no opportunity of showing your Talents.

MOSES. None at all--I hadn't the Pleasure of knowing his Distresses till he was some thousands worse than nothing, till it was impossible to add to them.

SIR OLIVER. Unfortunate indeed! but I suppose you have done all in your Power for him honest Moses?

MOSES. Yes he knows that--This very evening I was to have brought him a gentleman from the city who does not know him and will I believe advance some money.

SIR PETER. What[!] one Charles has never had money from before?

MOSES. Yes[--]Mr. Premium, of Crutched Friars.

SIR PETER. Egad, Sir Oliver a Thought strikes me!--Charles you say does'nt know Mr. Premium?

MOSES. Not at all.

SIR PETER. Now then Sir Oliver you may have a better opportunity of satisfying yourself than by an old romancing tale of a poor Relation-- go with my friend Moses and represent Mr. Premium and then I'll answer for't you'll see your Nephew in all his glory.

SIR OLIVER. Egad I like this Idea better than the other, and I may visit Joseph afterwards as old Stanley.

SIR PETER. True so you may.

ROWLEY. Well this is taking Charles rather at a disadvantage, to be sure--however Moses--you understand Sir Peter and will be faithful----

MOSES. You may depend upon me--and this is near the Time I was to have gone.

SIR OLIVER. I'll accompany you as soon as you please, Moses---- but hold--I have forgot one thing--how the plague shall I be able to pa.s.s for a Jew?

MOSES. There's no need--the Princ.i.p.al is Christian.

SIR OLIVER. Is He--I'm very sorry to hear it--but then again-- an't I rather too smartly dressed to look like a money-Lender?

SIR PETER. Not at all; 'twould not be out of character, if you went in your own carriage--would it, Moses!

MOSES. Not in the least.

SIR OLIVER. Well--but--how must I talk[?] there's certainly some cant of usury and mode of treating that I ought to know.

SIR PETER. Oh, there's not much to learn--the great point as I take it is to be exorbitant enough in your Demands hey Moses?

MOSES. Yes that's very great Point.

SIR OLIVER. I'll answer for't I'll not be wanting in that--I'll ask him eight or ten per cent. on the loan--at least.

MOSES. You'll be found out directly--if you ask him no more than that, you'll be discovered immediately.

SIR OLIVER. Hey!--what the Plague!--how much then?

MOSES. That depends upon the Circ.u.mstances--if he appears not very anxious for the supply, you should require only forty or fifty per cent.--but if you find him in great Distress, and want the monies very bad--you may ask double.

SIR PETER. A good--[h]onest Trade you're learning, Sir Oliver--

SIR OLIVER. Truly, I think so--and not unprofitable--

MOSES. Then you know--you haven't the monies yourself, but are forced to borrow them for him of a Friend.

SIR OLIVER. O I borrow it of a Friend do I?

MOSES. And your friend is an unconscion'd Dog--but you can't help it.

SIR OLIVER. My Friend's an unconscionable Dog, is he?