The Rejuvenation of Aunt Mary Part 35

"Come on and let's go somewhere else," said Burnett. "Every time I look at somebody it's someone else and that makes me nervous."

"Now see what you've done!" said the parrot.

"Did you know his long suit when you bought him?" Clover asked Burnett.

"No," said Burnett; "they told me that he didn't use slang and that was all."

It was well along in the evening-or night-and a brisk discussion arose as to where to go next.

"I'll tell you," said Clover, "we'll take a ride. Let me see what time is it?-12.30. Just the time for a drive. We'll take three cabs and sally forth and drive up and down and back and forth in the cool night air."

"And jews-harps!" cried Burnett. "Oh, I say, there's a bully idea! We'll go to a drug store and buy some jews-harps and play on them as we drive along. We'll each sing our own tune, and the effect will be so novel.

Let's do it."

"Jews-harps-" said Clover thoughtfully, "jews-harps for three cabs-that'll make-let me see-that'll make-" he hesitated.

"Oh, the driver will make the change," said Burnett impatiently. "Come on.

If we're going to have the cabs and jews-harps it's time to get out and take the stump in the good cause."

"Where's my ear-trumpet?" said Aunt Mary, blankly,-"it's been left somewhere."

"No, it hasn't," said Mitch.e.l.l. "It's here! I'm holding it for you. It's much easier holding it than picking it up. It seems so slippery to-night."

"I'm not going out to get the cabs," said Clover. "I thought of the idea and someone else must work it out. I'm opposed to working after time and I call time at midnight."

Mitch.e.l.l rose with a depressed air.

"I'll go," he said. "I feel the need of a walk. When I feel the need of anything I always take it and I've needed and taken so freely to-night that I need to take a walk to-"

"I don't think it funny to talk that way," said Burnett a little heatedly.

"If you want to get the cabs why get the cabs. I'm going to get them, too, and I reckon we can get them combined just as easy as alone."

"I will go with you," said his friend solemnly. "I will accompany you because I feel the need-" He stopped and turned his hat over and over. "I know there's a hole to put my head into," he declared, "but I can't just put my hand-I mean my head-on to-I mean, into-it."

"Do you expect to find a bra.s.s hand pointing to it?" said Burnett testily.

"Come on!"

"Three cabs and five-or was it six?-jews-harps?" continued Mitch.e.l.l dreamily. "It must have been six, five for we five, and one for Lord Chesterfield-but where is Lord Chesterfield?" he asked suddenly with a disturbed glance around. "I hope he hasn't deserted and gone home."

"Come on, come on!" said Burnett. "There won't be a sober cab left if we don't hurry while everything is still able to stand up."

This reasoning seemed to alarm Mitch.e.l.l and he went out with him at once.

"My head feels awfully," said Clover to Jack. "It sort of grinds and grates-does yours?"

Jack stared straight ahead and made no reply.

"I'm goin' home no more to roam," said Aunt Mary slowly and sadly,-"I'm goin' home no more to roam, no more to sin an' sorrow. I'm goin' home no more to roam-I'm goin' home to-morrow. O hum!" She heaved a heavy sigh.

"Now see what you've done!" said the parrot with emphasis.

"Never mind," said Clover bitterly. "Better people than you have gone home before now; I used to do it myself before I was old enough to know worse.

Will you excuse me if I say, 'd.a.m.n this buzzing in my head?'"

"I know how you feel," said Aunt Mary sympathetically. "Don't you want me to ring for the porter and have him make up your berth right away?"

Clover didn't seem to hear. His eyes were roving moodily about the room; they looked almost as faded as his mustache.

"Seems to me they're gone a long time," said Jack presently, twisting a little in his seat. "It never takes me so long to get a cab. I hold up my hand-the man stops-and I get in-what's the matter, Aunt Mary?" He asked the question in sudden alarm at seeing Aunt Mary bury her face hastily in her handkerchief.

"What's the matter?" he repeated loudly.

"Don't mind me," said Aunt Mary sobbing. "It's just that I happened to just think of Lu-Lu-Lucinda-and somehow I don't seem to have no strength to bear it."

"Split the handkerchief between us," said Clover. "I want to cry, too, and there's no time like the present for doing what you want to do."

"Rot!" said Jack, "look here-"

He was interrupted by the return of the emba.s.sy, Mitch.e.l.l bearing the jews-harps.

"What's the matter?" Burnett asked.

"Nothing," said Clover; "we were so worried over you, that's all." Burnett called for the bill and found that he had run out of cash; "Or maybe I've had my pocket picked," he suggested. "I'm beginning to be in just the mood in which I always get my pocket picked."

Jack produced a roll of bills and settled for the refreshments. Then they all started down stairs as Aunt Mary wouldn't risk an elevator going down.

"It's all right comin' up," she said, "but if it broke when you were going down where'd you be?"

"In the elevator," said Clover. "I'd never jump, I know that."

"Oh, I've left my ear-trumpet," said Aunt Mary.

"Let's draw lots to see who goes back?" Burnett suggested.

They drew and the lot fell to Clover.

"I'm not going back," he said coldly. "I haven't got the energy. Let her apply the megaphone."

Jack went back.

Then they all got into the street and into the cabs. Aunt Mary and Jack went first, Mitch.e.l.l and Burnett second, and Clover brought up the rear alone.

They set off and it must be admitted that the effect of the three cabs going single file one after another with their five occupants giving forth a most imperfect version of his or her favorite tune, was at once novel and awe-inspiring. But like all sweet things upon this earth the concert was not of long endurance. It was only a few minutes before the duos ceased utterly to duo and the soloist in the rear fell sound asleep. For several blocks there was a mournful and tell-tale lack of harmony upon the air and then the three young men seemed to have exhausted their mouths and all lapsed into a more or less conscious state of quietude.

Only Aunt Mary was indefatigable. Like Cleopatra, age seemed to have no power to stale her infinite variety, and leaning back in her own corner she continued to placidly and peacefully intone with disregard for time and tune which never ruffled a wrinkle. She hadn't played on a jews-harp in sixty years, and being deaf she was pleasantly astonished at how well she still did it. Jack leaned in his corner with folded arms; he was deeply conscious of wishing that it was the next day-any day-any other day-for the week had been a wearing one and he could not but be mortally glad that it was so nearly over. The task of fitting the plan of Aunt Mary's revelries to the measure of her personal capacity had been a very hard one and his soul panted for relief therefrom. It is one thing to undertake a task and another thing to persevere to its successful completion. Aunt Mary's nephew was tired-very tired.

A little later he felt a weight against him; he looked; it was Aunt Mary's head,-she was oblivious there on his bosom.