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Moreouer, although I be not afrayd to encounter with this beast, yet would I haue all men to know with what minde I vndertake this enterprise, namely, not that I meane to contend with his pestiferous rancour, by reproches, and railing speeches (for as it is in the common prouerbe:
I know, that if I striue with dung most vile, How ere it be, my selfe I shall defile);
but that I may satisfie all honest and well affected men, euen strangers themselues, who shall hereafter reade or heare, or haue heretofore heard that Germane pasquill, least they also should thinke that we woorthily sustaine so monstrous a disgrace: and also that I may from henceforth, if it be possible, restraine others (who vse those venomous Germaine rimes to the vpbrading of our nation, and from hence borrow their scoffes, and reproachfull taunts to the debasing of vs Iselanders) from that libertie of backbiting.
Therefore, that I may not be tedious to the reader with long circ.u.mstances, I will come to the rehearsing of those things which that railing Germane hath heaped vp in his leud pasquill: whom also I could bring in, repeating his friendly verses of the Ilanders, within the compa.s.se of this my booke, but that I doe foresee that the sayd slanderous libell being stuffed with so many and diuers reproches, might breed offence to all honest men, and deterre them from reading it, with the filthinesse thereof.
I will therefore repeat the princ.i.p.all matters (omitting those things which he hath common with others, or, that heretofore haue been examined) but farre more modestly then he, least (as I sayd) I cause good and learned mens cares to tingle at his leud and vnseemely rimes: that they are desirous to see or heare him let them enquire at the Stationers. It is no part of our meaning (I say) to defile these papers with his stinking slanders, or with the filthy sinke of his reproches.
[Sidenote: The first obiection or reproch.] First therefore, this our goodly Germaine Historiographer obiecteth that there be many Pastours in Island, which preach not to their people once in two yeres, as it is read in the former edition of this pasquill, which notwithstanding the latter edition doth refute: saying that the sayd Pastours vse to preach but fiue times in an whole yeere which two, how well they agree together, let the reader be iudge, seeing it is manifest that the authour himselfe, presently after the first edition, had sca.r.s.e seene Island. So oftentimes one he betrayeth another, according to that saying: Trueth agreeth vnto trueth; but falshood agreeth neither to trueth nor to falshood.
But sith it is our part not to dissemble the trueth in any place, we will not denie that holy sermons, about the time wherein this sycophant liued in Island, namely in the yere 1554, were seldomer in vse then they are at this day, namely, the darkenesse of popery being sca.r.s.ely at that time dispelled. Which also is to be vnderstood concerning the Psalmes of Dauid mumbled by the common people in Latine, as he casteth vs in the teeth: for the Papists grounding all the hope of their saluation in the Ma.s.se, did little regard the sermon or doctrine. But after we were freed from that mist, it hath bene (G.o.d be thanked) farre otherwise with vs: although we cannot altogether excuse the dulnesse, slouth, and preposterous care of certeine of our Pastours. Which, whether it agreeth to any of their countreymen or no, let other nations iudge.
SECTIO DUODECIMA.
[Sidenote: 2. Conuitium] Secund calumniatur vitilitigator: Adulteria et scortationes non mod publica esse et frequentia scelera inter Islandos: sed ab ijs pro scelere ne haberi quidem.
Etsi autem foedissimae istae turpitudines etiam in nostra repub. non prorsus inusitatae sunt: tamen c.u.m omnibus constet in alijs quoque nationibus longe etiam frequentiores esse, c.u.m ibi quoque populi frequentia maior: immerit et maligne hoc nomine magis Islandos, quam populos et gentes reliquas, quarum, vt dixi, nomen etiam plus nostratibus hoc crimine male audit, notauit.
Et licet ex animo optarim longe minus ad scelera, et turpitudines in nostra patria conniueri, quam pa.s.sim hic fieri videmus: tamen etiam innata illa mordendi libidine, hoc veterator in praesenti conuitio attexuit: videlicet, qud scelera ista ab Islandis pro scelere non habeantur. Nam in qua demum repub. id impudens ille a.s.serere audet? Illane; quae in legem codicis ll.
t.i.tulo Mannhelge: cap. 28. iurauit; quae statuit, vt iterum adulterium qui c.u.m coniuge alterius commiserit, confiscatis suis bonis, capite etiam pectatur? Illane, quae pro adulterio, a famulo c.u.m vxore domini commisso, non ita dudum 80. thalerorum mulctam irrogauit? Illane, quae eundem, si ad statutum tempus non soluerit vel vades dederit, in exilium proscribendum decreuit? Illane: cuius leges politicae, quemuis in adulterio c.u.m vxore, a viro legitime deprehensum, si euaserit, homicidij mulctam expendere iubent?
Illane, cuius itidem leges politicae, in complexu matris, filiae aut sororis, a filio, patre, vel fratre deprehensum, vitam suam midio eius, quod quis si eundem insontem interfecisset, expendere teneretur, redimere iubent?
Illane, cuius leges politicae adultorium sceleris infandi nomine notarunt et d.a.m.narunt? Et in eo terti deprehensum, capite plectendum seuere mandant?
Cernis igitur, Lector benigne, quam iniurium habeamus notarium, dicentem: Adulterium et scortationes in Islandia peccati aut sceleris nomen non mereri. Nam licet politici quidam hoc vel illud scelus impunitum omittant, non debet tota gens, non leges, non boni et pij omnes, eo nomine in ius vocari, aut male audire.
The same in English.
THE TWELFTH SECTION.
[Sidenote: The second reproach. ] Secondly, the trifler shamefully reporteth, that adulteries and wh.o.r.edomes are not onely publique, and common vices amongst Islanders: but that they are not accounted by them for vices.
Although indeed these most filthy abominations, euen in our common wealth, be not altogether vnusuall: notwithstanding, since al men know that they are farre more common in other nations, where be greater mult.i.tudes of people, he did vndeseruedly, and maliciously note the Islanders rather with this reproch, then other people and nations, who are more infamous with this crime then our countreymen.
And albeit I wish with all mine heart that vices and enormities were much lesse wincked at in our countrey, then we see they are, yet notwithstanding this iugler by reason of his naturall inclination to backbiting, hath added this in his last reproch: namely that these vices by the Iselanders are not accounted for vice. For, in what common wealth dare the impudent companion affirme this to be true? What? in that common wealth which hath sworne to obserue the law contained in our statute booke vnder the t.i.tle of Manhelge chap 28, whereby it is enacted, that whosoeuer committeth adultery with another man's wife the second time, his goods being confiscate, he shall be punished with death? Or in that common wealth, which not long since hath inflicted the penalty of 80 dollers vpon a seruant committing adultery with his masters wife? Or in that common wealth which hath decreed that if he doth not pay, nor lay in sureties at the day appointed he shalbe banished the country? Or in that common wealth the politike lawes whereof doe streightly command that whosoeuer be according to law found in adultery with another man's wife, by her husband, if he escape, he shall vndergoe the punishment of manslaughter? Or in that common wealth, the politike lawes whereof do also enioyne a man that is taken in carnall copulation with the mother, daughter, or sister, by the sonne, father, or brother, to redeeme his life with the one halfe of that which he oaght to haue payed, if he had shed the innocent bloud of the sayd party? Or in that common wealth the pollitike lawes whereof haue noted and condemned adultery vnder the name of a most heinous offence? And do straightly command that he which is taken the third time in that beastly act shalbe punished with death?
You see therefore (friendly readers) what an iniurious Notary we haue, affirming that adultery and wh.o.r.edome in Island deserueth not the name of sinne and wickednesse for although some officers let slip this or that vice vnpunished, yet ought not the whole nation, nor the lawes, nor all good and G.o.dly men, in that regard, to be accused or euill spoken of.
SECTIO DECIMATERTIA.
[Sidenote: 3. Conuitium] Tertium conuicium est, quo fraudis et perfidiae erga Germanos Islandis notam inurit. Fuit autem proculdubio famosi huius libelli author, cerdo et propola circ.u.mforaneus, multsque Ilandiae angulos, sordidae mercaturae gratia, ostintim adierat: quod ipse de se in praeclaris illi suis rythmis testatur, maximam Islandiae partem sibi peragratam esse.
Vnde c.u.m ipse mala fide c.u.m mulus egerit (plerumque enim fraus et mendacia coniunguntur, et mendacem se fuisse, hac ingenij sui experientia satis probauit) etiam forte a se deceptorum fraudem est expertus. Hinc illa in totam gentem criminatio ext.i.tit: Dissimulato interea, qua fide quidam Germanorum, quibus annua est nauigatio ad Islandos, c.u.m nostris hominibus agant. Ea autem querela, c.u.m non alios conuiciari, sed aliorum in gentem nostram immerita conuncia monstrare inst.i.tuerim, consult supersedeo.
The same in English.
THE THIRTEENTH SECTION.
[Sidenote: The third reproach] The third reproch is, whereby he doth brand the Islanders with the marke of deceit and trechery toward the Germans.
Doubtles the author of this libell was some vagabond huckster or pedler, and had gone particularly into many corners of Island to vtter his trumpery wares, which he also testifieth of himselfe in his worthy rimes, that he had trauailed thorow the greatest part of Island, whereupon when he had played the cousining mate with others (for often times deceit and lying are ioyned together, and he hath sufficiently proued himselfe to be a liar, by this triall of his wit) peraduenture himselfe was beguiled by them whom he before time had defrauded.
From hence proceedeth this slander, against our whole Nation: dissembling in the meane time with what honestie certaine Germans, making yerely voyages into Island, deale with our men. But seeing by this complaint I haue not determined to reproch others, but to lay open the vndeserued reproches of others against oar nation, I do here of purpose surcease.
SECTIO DECIMAQUARTA.
[Sidenote: 4. 5. 6. & 7. Conuitia.] Quarto: negat in conuituijs quemquam disc.u.mbentium a mensa surgere: sed matres familias singulis conuiuis quoties opus fuerit matellas porrigere. Praeterea variam conuiuiorum edendi bibendique rusticitatem notat.
Cubandi et prandendi ritus obijcit: quod decem plus minus in eodem lecto promiscue viri c.u.m foeminis pernoctent, inque lecto cib.u.m capiant: atque interea se non nisi aleae aut latrunculorum ludo exerceant.
s.e.xto. Calumniatur eosdem faciem et os vrina proluere.
Septimo. Nuptiarum, sponsalium, natalitiorum celebritatem et funerum ritus contemptuose extenuat.
Haec et huiusmodi plurima in gentem insontem, im de se et suis optime meritam, impurus calumniator euomit. Quae quidem eius generis sunt, vt illi de his respondere prorsus dedignemur. Nam vt demus (quod tamen non damus) aliquid huiusmodi apud homines sordidos, et ex ipsa vulgi colluuie infimos, quibusc.u.m longe saepius, quam bonus et honestis conuersabatur, animaduertisse praeclarum hunc notarium Gemanic.u.m (vixerat enim, vt eius rhythmi testantur, diutiuscule in locis maritimis Islandiae, quo fere promiscuum vulgus, tempore piscaturae annuatim confluit, et tam extraneorum nautarum, quam sua nequitia corruptum, saepius inhoneste mores et vtam inst.i.tuit) Tamen manifestiorem etiam hoc loco iniuriam n.o.bis facit, vnius nebulonis et desperati Sycophantae turpitudine, totam gentem (vt fere solent etiam alij) aspergendo, quam vt refutatione vlla indigeat. Cuius rei etiam ipsi extranei in nostra Insula non parum versati, locupletissimi testes esse possunt.
Possem multas eius farinae foeditates, rusticitates et obscoenitates etiam in ipsius natione deprehensas colligere. Sed odi facundiam caninam, nec in aliorum opprobrium disertum esse iuuat: nec tam tenet esse volo, vt verbulis transuerberer. Id tantum viderint boni et pij omnes, cuius sit animi, pessima quaeque ab vno aut altera designata, toti genti obijcere. Si quis Germaniae aut alterius nationes vrbes et pagos omnes peragret, et scelera ac mores pessimos, furta, homicidia, parricidia, scortationes, adulteria, incestus luxuriem, rapinas et reliquas impietates et obscoenitates in vnum coactas, omnibus Germanis, aut alioqui alteri cuiuis toti nationi communes esse a.s.serat, atque haec omnia insigniter mentiendo, exaggeret, isne optimae rei studiosus habebitur?
Sed quid mirum, licet verbero, et, vt proprie notem, porcus impurus, iste, inquam, Rhythmista, naturam et ingenium suum eiusmodi loidoria prodiderit?
Notum est enim porcos, c.u.m hortos amaenissimos intrarint, nec lilium nec rosas aut flores alioqui pulcherrimos et suauissimos decerpere: Sed rostro in coenum p.r.o.no, quicquid est luti et stercoris volutare, vertere et inuertere, donec impurissima, hoc est, suo genio apprime congruentia eruant, vbi demum solida voluptate pasc.u.n.tur.
Ad istum igitur modum hic porcus Rythmista, optima, et quae in nostra Repub.
laudabilia esse possunt, sicco pede praeterit, pessima quaeque atque ea, vel a nullo, vel admodum paucis designata, hoc est, suae naturae, et ingenio aptissima, vt se esse, qui dicitur, re ipsa probaret, corrasit; vnde posthac porci nomen ex moribus et ingenio ipsius factum, sort.i.tor.
The same in English.
THE FOURTEENTH SECTION.
[Sidenote: The 4. 5. 6. & 7. reproches.] Fourthly, he sayth that in bankets none of the ghests vse to rise from the table: but that the good wife of the house reacheth to euery one a chamber pot, so oft as need requireth.
Moreouer, he noteth much vnmanerliness of eating and drinking at bankets.
Fiftly, he obiecteth customes of lying in bed, and of dining: namely that ten persons, more or lesse, men and women be altogether in the same bed, and that they eat their meat lying in bed: and that in the meane time they do nothing but play at dice or at tables.
Sixtly, he reporteth that they wash their hands or their faces in p.i.s.se.
Seuenthly, he despightfully abaseth our solemnizings of marriages, spousals, birth-dayes, and our customes at burials.
These, and a number of such like reproches hath this impure slanderer, spued foorth against an innocent nation, yea and that nation which hath deserued right well of him and his countrimen. Which are of the same kind with these, in so much that we altogether disdeigne to make answere vnto them. For, that we may graunt (which notwithstanding we will in no case yeelde vnto) that this worthy Germane notarie obserued some such matter among base companions, and the very of-scouring of the common people, with whom he was much more conuersant than with good and honest persons (for he had liued, as his rimes testifie, somewhat long vpon the coast of Island, whither a confused rout of the meanest common people, in fishing time do yerely resort, who being naught aswell through their owne leudnesse, as by the wicked behauiour of outlandish mariners, often times doe leade a badde and dishonest life) notwithstanding we are in this place more manifestly wronged through the knauery of this one varlet, and desperate sycophant by his defaming of the whole nation (as others also vsually do) then that it should neede any refutation at all. Of which thing strangers themselues, who are not a little conuersant in our Iland, may be most sufficient witnesses.
I could also gather together many such filthy, vnmannerly, and baudie fashions noted by others euen in his own countrey. But I detest this dogged eloquence, neither take I any pleasure to be witty in the disgracing of others: and yet I will not shew my selfe such a milke-soppe as to be daunted with light words. Onely, let all honest and good men consider, what disposition it argueth, for one to obiect against a whole nation certaine misdemeanours committed by some one or other particular man. If any man should trauell thorowout all the cities and townes of Germanie or any other nation, and heaping together the offences, and most leud maners, the robberies, manslaughters, murthers, wh.o.r.edomes, adulteries, incests, riots, extortions, and other prophane, and filthy actes, should affirme them to be common to all Germans, or otherwise to any other whole nation, and should exaggerate all these things with notorious lies, is he to be accounted one that spends his time in a good argument? But what maruaile is it, though a varlet, and, that I may giue him his true t.i.tle, a filthy hogge, that imer (I say) hath bewrayed his nature and disposition in reproches? For it is well knowen that swine, when they enter into most pleasant gardens, do not plucke lilies or roses, or any other most beautifull aud sweet flowers; but thrusting their snouts into the ground, doe tumble and tosse vp and downe whatsoeuer durt and dung they can finde, vntill they haue rooted vp most vncleane things, namely such as are best agreeable to their nature, wherewith they greedily glut themselues: Euen so this hoggish Rimer lightly pa.s.seth ouer the best and most commendable things of our Common wealth, but as for the woorst, and those which haue been committed by none, or by very few, namely, such things as best fit his humour and disposition (that he might indeed show himselfe to be the same which we haue termed him) those things (I say) hath he sc.r.a.ped vp together: whereupon hereafter by my consent, for his maners and disposition let him enioy the name of a swine.
SECTIO DECIMAQUINTA.
[Sidenote: 9. Conuitium.] Nonum conuicium hic recensebimus, quod a victu, ac praecipue cibo potu Islandorum maledicus ille porcus, non vno aut paucis verbis, sed prolixa inuectiua petiuit: Nempe qud cibis vtantur vetustis, et insulsis, idque sine panis vsu: Tum etiam qud varia et incognita extraneis piscium genera illis sint esui, et aquam ac serum lactis in potum misceant. Quae omnia venenatus hic pasquillus diserta contumelia, et ingeniosa calumnia, pulchre amplificauit.