The Playboy of the Western World Part 14

CHRISTY. If I can wring a neck among you, I'll have a royal judgment looking on the trembling jury in the courts of law. And won't there be crying out in Mayo the day I'm stretched upon the rope with ladies in their silks and satins snivelling in their lacy kerchiefs, and they rhyming songs and ballads on the terror of my fate? [He squirms round on the floor and bites Shawn's leg.]

SHAWN -- [shrieking.] My leg's bit on me. He's the like of a mad dog, I'm thinking, the way that I will surely die.

CHRISTY -- [delighted with himself.] -- You will then, the way you can shake out h.e.l.l's flags of welcome for my coming in two weeks or three, for I'm thinking Satan hasn't many have killed their da in Kerry, and in Mayo too. [Old Mahon comes in behind on all fours and looks on unnoticed.]

MEN -- [to Pegeen.] -- Bring the sod, will you?

PEGEEN [coming over.] -- G.o.d help him so. (Burns his leg.)

CHRISTY -- [kicking and screaming.] -- O, glory be to G.o.d! [He kicks loose from the table, and they all drag him towards the door.]

JIMMY -- [seeing old Mahon.] -- Will you look what's come in? [They all drop Christy and run left.]

CHRISTY -- [scrambling on his knees face to face with old Mahon.] -- Are you coming to be killed a third time, or what ails you now?

MAHON. For what is it they have you tied?

CHRISTY. They're taking me to the peelers to have me hanged for slaying you.

MICHAEL -- [apologetically.] It is the will of G.o.d that all should guard their little cabins from the treachery of law, and what would my daughter be doing if I was ruined or was hanged itself?

MAHON -- [grimly, loosening Christy.] -- It's little I care if you put a bag on her back, and went picking c.o.c.kles till the hour of death; but my son and myself will be going our own way, and we'll have great times from this out telling stories of the villainy of Mayo, and the fools is here. (To Christy, who is freed.) Come on now.

CHRISTY. Go with you, is it? I will then, like a gallant captain with his heathen slave. Go on now and I'll see you from this day stewing my oatmeal and washing my spuds, for I'm master of all fights from now.

(Pushing Mahon.) Go on, I'm saying.

MAHON. Is it me?

CHRISTY. Not a word out of you. Go on from this.

MAHON [walking out and looking back at Christy over his shoulder.] -- Glory be to G.o.d! (With a broad smile.) I am crazy again! [Goes.]

CHRISTY. Ten thousand blessings upon all that's here, for you've turned me a likely gaffer in the end of all, the way I'll go romancing through a romping lifetime from this hour to the dawning of the judgment day.

[He goes out.]

MICHAEL. By the will of G.o.d, we'll have peace now for our drinks. Will you draw the porter, Pegeen?

SHAWN -- [going up to her.] -- It's a miracle Father Reilly can wed us in the end of all, and we'll have none to trouble us when his vicious bite is healed.

PEGEEN -- [hitting him a box on the ear.] -- Quit my sight. (Putting her shawl over her head and breaking out into wild lamentations.) Oh my grief, I've lost him surely. I've lost the only Playboy of the Western World.

CURTAIN