The New Guy (and Other Senior Year Distractions) Part 3

"I'll take that as a victory."

CHAPTER FOUR.

Natalie and I walk into cellular and molecular biology at the same time the next day, and while ignoring each other is pretty much how we normally work, I'm not sure I can today.

"Hi," I say.

"Congratulations, Julia," she says, even though who calls me that? "I hear Mr. Wheeler made you editor."

I still have the impulse to explain the whole technicality thing to her. But she's the very last person who requires that explanation. "Yeah."

She walks past me and takes her seat. I try not to frown at how unilluminated I am over this situation, but considering how bad I am at controlling my face, I'm sure I frown.

After fourth period, I stop off at my locker to put away my newspaper stuff on my way to the cafeteria. I do consider keeping my red notebook with me to take some notes. Our table isn't exactly quiet, but I've found it's pretty easy to let the couples self-maintain and therefore get work done.

"Hey, Jules." Alex walks right up to me. "Big liaison business today?"

"No liaison business at all today," I say. "We only have meetings the first Monday of each month. Are you finding your way around all right? If you have any questions, any liaison or I could-"

"I'm actually doing fine," he says. Last night Sadie and I pulled up all the official Chaos 4 All music videos we could find on VidLook (there were only four, and three of those we'd never seen before). I feel a sense of guilt that we watched all of them (some of them up to six times), but they are just there out in the world for anyone to view.

Also, right now, we're just here out in the world-out in the hallways of Eagle Vista Academy, at least-for anyone to view. I don't think it's my imagination that everyone who walks past stares first at Alex, and then at me to figure out why he'd be talking to Jules McAllister-Morgan.

Alex reaches mere centimeters past me and taps the photo of Daisy and Peanut taped up in my locker. "Who are those?"

"Dogs," I say. "My dogs, I mean, not just, like, random dogs. Ha-ha, why would I have pictures of random dogs?"

"I don't know, they seem cool, why not? We've moved a lot, so my parents' official rule is no pets." He's so close to me right now, and it's hard not to stare at his face. I'm tall like Darcy-we're both five foot nine-but Alex is taller. His eyes are such a warm shade of brown, like if you could make a brown-colored gold. Which doesn't make sense, I know, but that's all I can think of as I look into them and-oh my G.o.d, I am standing near a boy and just flat-out looking into his eyes as if this is a thing I now do.

"Juuuuuules!" Sadie dashes up and makes a sudden stop, and I can't deny that at this very moment her suspicions or opinions about Alex Powell and his feelings toward me seem at least partially accurate. But I'm not upset she's here because this is the closest I've ever stood to a boy doing absolutely nothing, and I don't know what would even happen next if we spend more time alone in this hallway.

"Hey, Sadie," Alex says.

"Hi, Alex. Are you guys coming to lunch?"

I leave my red notebook in my locker and slam it shut. "Where else would we be going?"

"Anyone could be going anywhere," she says, walking ahead of us en route to the cafeteria. "Life's open like that."

"Don't worry," I say to Alex. "She says things like that all the time."

"I definitely wasn't worried."

I still don't know what to do. I just keep walking. Luckily once we're in the cafeteria, he wants nachos again, and I'm getting my usual salad, so I have a chance to make a break from him. Sadie joins me, even though I'm pretty sure she's not getting a salad.

"Jules."

"I don't know, okay? I don't. That's all I can say."

"That's very little."

I don't ask how Sadie figured things out with Justin, because Justin isn't her first boyfriend, and also Sadie would never need help figuring things out with people. Sadie is people. I know I'm a person, but somehow it's not the same.

"Ugh, look how close I almost got to getting a salad!" Sadie ruffles my hair before dashing over to b.u.t.t into line with Alex.

I try to focus on getting the perfect blend of greens and protein, but it's hard to keep my mind on salad when Alex exists. When I run it over in my head, it seems ridiculous-it felt like a moment, but also we were literally looking at a photo of my dogs. How many romantic moments are built around looking at pictures of dogs?

And, fine, maybe it was a moment. It doesn't change the other stuff, like that Alex Powell has been famous, kind of. And even if that weren't true, I still don't have time for any of this. I should have definitely brought my red notebook, but one moment with a dog photo and suddenly I've turned completely irresponsible.

"Hey. Hey."

I look over to my right to see a girl glaring at me, and a whole line of people behind her.

"Um, are you gonna look at garbanzo beans all day or are you gonna keep walking?"

"Sorry," I say. "They're full of protein and fiber."

There are now a lot of glaring faces in the salad line, so I forgo any bean decisions and proceed immediately to the safety of the dressing bar.

Everyone else is at the table by the time I get there, so I slide into the remaining seat between Sadie and Alex. Sadie's in the midst of polling everyone about what they think the worst soda is. Since I've already answered this one many times (Mountain Dew), I ignore the conversation and dig my phone out of my bag to see if Mom or Darcy has messaged about anything. I drive straight from school to where I volunteer on Wednesday nights, so sometimes texting is the only way we can coordinate dinner.

I do have a new message, and from only one minute ago. But it's not from either one of my parents. It's from a 734 number I don't know.

What are you doing tonight?

I tell myself not to look over at Alex. But I look over at Alex. He pauses from nacho-eating and grins at me. I don't know what to do with all the grinning.

I stare back at the phone and type my answer with shaky hands.

I volunteer at Stray Rescue on Wednesdays.

Alex doesn't have his sound off on his phone-breaking a pretty major school rule! Should I have gone over cell phone procedures in the liaison introduction yesterday? Whatever, the point is that Alex's phone audibly receives a text, and everyone looks over, or at least it feels like everyone. It's actually just Sadie and Em.

But Alex just picks up his phone and starts typing back. Sadie smiles right at me, so I look away. My heart pounds in my neck, which is a weird place for my heart to suddenly be. And I realize I am not in the mood for my salad. And it's not the salad's fault; everyone's food looks awful.

My phone buzzes again. I try not to look down immediately, but Sadie's still watching me, so the speed of my looking down won't really make me more or less suspicious.

I could come with you, if they need more volunteers.

Another message comes in while I'm holding the phone.

Wait, is it dogs? Dogs are cool. If it's wildlife I don't know.

"Of course it's dogs," I say, and then I remember we aren't having this conversation aloud. We're having it on our phones.

"What's dogs?" Sadie asks. "Who are you guys texting?"

"No one and nothing," I say. "I mean, nothing and no one."

I look back to my phone, even though I can feel everyone staring at me.

Why would it be wildlife? No one calls wildlife strays! I just walk dogs for a few hours. It's really easy, if you actually want to come.

Did I just ask a boy out? No, I just asked Alex Powell out. I don't even have any normal-boy experience, and here I am, jumping straight into Former Teen Idol territory. What am I doing?

"I'm not hungry." I jump up and shove my phone into my purse. I start to take my salad with me to throw away, but I immediately think about how many people around the world and even in this very city are hungry. "Someone can have this salad if they want it. You guys know I don't believe in throwing away food."

Once I'm out of the cafeteria, I don't know where to go, and I'm still wavering between the bathroom and the library when someone steps up next to me.

"I like it when you freak out," Sadie says. "I wish it happened more."

"What is even going on?" I ask.

"Uh, something super exciting? I like him, Jules. Not like that, just-he's cute and funny and tall and seems smart. All very good boy qualities."

"No one's ever liked me," I say.

"I'm sure that's not true," Sadie says.

"You sound like my mom."

"Which one? Wait, who cares! They're both great."

"I don't know what to do," I say. "It doesn't feel real."

"It never feels real when it's good," she says. "The first time I kissed Justin, we might as well have been in outer s.p.a.ce."

"Outer s.p.a.ce is real," I say.

"Jules! You're missing the point."

"We're not supposed to be in the hallway."

Sadie grabs my arm and yanks me into the bathroom. She checks under all the stall doors before hopping up to sit on the row of sinks. "He asked me for your number. He's texting you. These are all real signs-no, not signs. Stuff is happening."

"I don't know what to do," I say again.

"There's no specific thing to do."

"There's always a specific thing to do." I get out my phone again. Alex has sent another text: I can walk dogs!

"Okay, well, the specific thing to do is just see what happens. That's it."

"That's not very specific." I glance in the mirror as if maybe I've forgotten to for a while and maybe I've gotten a lot hotter and this will all make sense. But I look the way I always look.

"Are there steps?" I ask. "You could write down steps for me."

"Oh my G.o.d, Jules, you weirdo. Boys aren't like your college application checklist. Boys are people, and we're people and, come on, you have friends! You know how to act with people. You're fine."

My phone buzzes again.

You ok?

"He's so nice," I say. "Or at least he acts nice. I don't get it."

"Just enjoy it. Period. End of sentence. Last advice."

"Oh, I doubt that."

We both laugh, and I take a moment to text back to Alex that I am okay. I'm not sure it's accurate, but it feels like the right response.

"I'm going to finish my lunch," Sadie says, fluffing her hair in the mirror. "Come with?"

"I'm going to the library to work on a few things." I follow her into the hallway and gesture in the opposite direction down the hallway. "But see you in English."

"See you then." She starts to head off, but nearly immediately turns around. "Wait. Can I seriously eat your salad?"

Mr. Wheeler finds me when I'm leaving the library after lunch, and he gives me the freshman submissions. I decide that even though I have time, I probably shouldn't actually seek out Alex right now. What am I going to tell him... the truth? There's no way any other girl that Alex went out with or whatever didn't understand how to proceed with just the concept of dating or whatever so I should probably keep as much to myself as I can. That's easy to do in economics because Ms. Schmidt starts talking the second the bell rings and doesn't let up until the next one sounds. But Alex sits by me, and as soon as we're dismissed he's just right there.

"I'm in for the dogs," he says. "But I have to admit something to you that could totally change how you see me."

"Oh," I say as I'm instantly sweaty and fighting a blush-that is, actually blushing. "Yeah? Uh-huh? Yes?"

I cut myself off before I keep going, but everything's pounding as I wait for Alex to reveal his boy-band past or however he's going to explain it to me. I wonder if I can fake an expression of surprise.

"I don't know how to drive," he says. "So you'll have to take me."

"Oh," I say again, and I wish I could see my face because then I could use it for reference when I am faking surprise for real. "That's not a big deal. I don't mind."

When we step out of Ms. Schmidt's cla.s.sroom, my face must be reflecting even more surprise, because there are bright blue flyers everywhere. TALON IS COMING, they say, with a little icon of an eagle.

"This is very strange." I mean to just think it, and the way it comes out of my mouth sounds way more full of wonder than the average person would be at seeing some flyers. "It's just that there are very strict rules with administration about what's allowed to be hung in hallways. It's supposed to only be from officially recognized school groups."

Alex grins at me. "Then I guess someone from an officially recognized school group did them."

I know he's teasing me, but at least he's teasing me. And I'm definitely blushing when I head off to calculus, so maybe I'll have to start getting used to this as my new state of being.

I still think Sadie could provide me with a checklist, though, if she really wanted.