The Merry Wives of Windsor Part 27

_Sim._ I may not conceal them, sir.

_Host._ Conceal them, or thou diest. 40

_Sim._ Why, sir, they were nothing but about Mistress Anne Page; to know if it were my master's fortune to have her or no.

_Fal._ 'Tis, 'tis his fortune.

_Sim._ What, sir? 45

_Fal._ To have her, or no. Go; say the woman told me so.

_Sim._ May I be bold to say so, sir?

_Fal._ Ay, sir; like who more bold.

_Sim._ I thank your worship: I shall make my master 50 glad with these tidings. [_Exit._

_Host._ Thou art clerkly, thou art clerkly, Sir John.

Was there a wise woman with thee?

_Fal._ Ay, that there was, mine host; one that hath taught me more wit than ever I learned before in my 55 life; and I paid nothing for it neither, but was paid for my learning.

_Enter BARDOLPH._

_Bard._ Out, alas, sir! cozenage, mere cozenage!

_Host._ Where be my horses? speak well of them, varletto. 60

_Bard._ Run away with the cozeners: for so soon as I came beyond Eton, they threw me off, from behind one of them, in a slough of mire; and set spurs and away, like three German devils, three Doctor Faustuses.

_Host._ They are gone but to meet the duke, villain: do 65 not say they be fled; Germans are honest men.

_Enter SIR HUGH EVANS._

_Evans._ Where is mine host?

_Host._ What is the matter, sir?

_Evans._ Have a care of your entertainments: there is a friend of mine come to town, tells me there is three 70 cozen-germans that has cozened all the hosts of Readins, of Maidenhead, of Colebrook, of horses and money. I tell you for good will, look you: you are wise, and full of gibes and vlouting-stocks, and 'tis not convenient you should be cozened. Fare you well. [_Exit._ 75

_Enter DOCTOR CAIUS._

_Caius._ Vere is mine host de Jarteer?

_Host._ Here, master doctor, in perplexity and doubtful dilemma.

_Caius._ I cannot tell vat is dat: but it is tell-a me dat you make grand preparation for a duke de Jamany: by my 80 trot, dere is no duke dat the court is know to come. I tell you for good vill: adieu. [_Exit._

_Host._ Hue and cry, villain, go!--a.s.sist me, knight. --I am undone!--Fly, run, hue and cry, villain!--I am undone!

[_Exeunt Host and Bard._ 85

_Fal._ I would all the world might be cozened; for I have been cozened and beaten too. If it should come to the ear of the court, how I have been transformed, and how my transformation hath been washed and cudgelled, they would melt me out of my fat drop by drop, and liquor 90 fishermen's boots with me: I warrant they would whip me with their fine wits till I were as crest-fallen as a dried pear.

I never prospered since I forswore myself at primero. Well, if my wind were but long enough [to say my prayers,] I would repent. 95

_Enter MISTRESS QUICKLY._

Now, whence come you?

_Quick._ From the two parties, forsooth.

_Fal._ The devil take one party, and his dam the other!

and so they shall be both bestowed. I have suffered more for their sakes, more than the villanous inconstancy of 100 man's disposition is able to bear.

_Quick._ And have not they suffered? Yes, I warrant; speciously one of them; Mistress Ford, good heart, is beaten black and blue, that you cannot see a white spot about her. 105

_Fal._ What tellest thou me of black and blue? I was beaten myself into all the colours of the rainbow; and I was like to be apprehended for the witch of Brentford: but that my admirable dexterity of wit, my counterfeiting the action of an old woman, delivered me, the knave constable 110 had set me i' the stocks, i' the common stocks, for a witch.

_Quick._ Sir, let me speak with you in your chamber: you shall hear how things go; and, I warrant, to your content.

Here is a letter will say somewhat. Good hearts, 115 what ado here is to bring you together! Sure, one of you does not serve heaven well, that you are so crossed.

_Fal._ Come up into my chamber. [_Exeunt._

NOTES: IV, 5

SCENE V.] SCENE VIII. Pope.

2: _snap_] _nap_ Q3.

17: [Above] Theobald. Enter Falstaff. Rowe. om. Ff Q3.

27: _Master Slender_] Steevens. _my master Slender,_ Ff Q3.

28: _thorough_] F1 Q3. _through_ F2 F3 F4.

39: Sim. _I may..._] Rowe. Fal. _I may..._ Ff Q3. Fal. _You may..._ Collier MS.

40: Host.] Fal. Warburton.

_Conceal them, or_] _Conceal them, and_ Hanmer. _Aye conseil them or_ Becket conj.

39, 40: _conceal, Conceal_] _reveal, Reveal_ Farmer conj.

42: _master's_] _master_ Q3.

49: _Ay, sir; like_] Ff Q3. _I tike,_ (Q1 Q2). _Ay, sir Tike,_ Steevens (Farmer conj.). _Ay, sir, tike,_ Collier. See note (IX).

58: SCENE IX. Pope.

61: _with_] _with by_ Collier MS.

71: _Readins_] _Reading_ F4.

80: _grand_] _agrand_ F3 F4.

85: [Exeunt H. and B.] Capell. [Exit F2. om. F1 Q3.

94: [_to say my prayers_] (Q1 Q2) Pope. om. Ff Q3.

95: _repent_] _pray and repent_ Collier MS.

96: SCENE X. Pope.

110: _an old woman_] _a wode woman_ Theobald.