The Merry Wives of Windsor Part 14

SCENE I. _A field near Frogmore._

_Enter SIR HUGH EVANS and SIMPLE._

_Evans._ I pray you now, good Master Slender's serving-man, and friend Simple by your name, which way have you looked for Master Caius, that calls himself doctor of physic?

_Sim._ Marry, sir, the pittie-ward, the park-ward, every 5 way; old Windsor way, and every way but the town way.

_Evans._ I most fehemently desire you you will also look that way.

_Sim._ I will, sir. [_Exit._

_Evans._ Pless my soul, how full of chollors I am, and 10 trempling of mind!--I shall be glad if he have deceived me. --How melancholies I am!--I will knog his urinals about his knave's costard when I have goot opportunities for the ork. --Pless my soul!-- [_Sings._

To shallow rivers, to whose falls 15 Melodious birds sings madrigals; There will we make our peds of roses, And a thousand fragrant posies.

To shallow--

Mercy on me! I have a great dispositions to cry. [_Sings._ 20

Melodious birds sing madrigals-- Whenas I sat in Pabylon-- And a thousand vagram posies.

To shallow &c.

_Re-enter SIMPLE._

_Sim._ Yonder he is coming, this way, Sir Hugh. 25

_Evans._ He's welcome. -- [_Sings._

To shallow rivers, to whose falls--

Heaven prosper the right!--What weapons is he?

_Sim._ No weapons, sir. There comes my master, Master Shallow, and another gentleman, from Frogmore, 30 over the stile, this way.

_Evans._ Pray you, give me my gown; or else keep it in your arms.

_Enter PAGE, SHALLOW, and SLENDER._

_Shal._ How now, master parson! Good morrow, good Sir Hugh. Keep a gamester from the dice, and a good 35 student from his book, and it is wonderful.

_Slen._ [_Aside_] Ah, sweet Anne Page!

_Page._ Save you, good Sir Hugh!

_Evans._ Pless you from his mercy sake, all of you!

_Shal._ What, the sword and the word! do you study 40 them both, master parson?

_Page._ And youthful still! in your doublet and hose this raw rheumatic day!

_Evans._ There is reasons and causes for it.

_Page._ We are come to you to do a good office, master 45 parson.

_Evans._ Fery well: what is it?

_Page._ Yonder is a most reverend gentleman, who, belike having received wrong by some person, is at most odds with his own gravity and patience that ever you saw. 50

_Shal._ I have lived fourscore years and upward; I never heard a man of his place, gravity, and learning, so wide of his own respect.

_Evans._ What is he?

_Page._ I think you know him; Master Doctor Caius, 55 the renowned French physician.

_Evans._ Got's will, and his pa.s.sion of my heart! I had as lief you would tell me of a mess of porridge.

_Page._ Why?

_Evans._ He has no more knowledge in Hibocrates and 60 Galen,--and he is a knave besides; a cowardly knave as you would desires to be acquainted withal.

_Page._ I warrant you, he's the man should fight with him.

_Slen._ [_Aside_] O sweet Anne Page! 65

_Shal._ It appears so, by his weapons. Keep them asunder: here comes Doctor Caius.

_Enter HOST, CAIUS, and RUGBY._

_Page._ Nay, good master parson, keep in your weapon.

_Shal._ So do you, good master doctor.

_Host._ Disarm them, and let them question: let them 70 keep their limbs whole, and hack our English.

_Caius._ I pray you, let-a me speak a word with your ear. Verefore vill you not meet-a me?

_Evans._ [_Aside to Caius_] Pray you, use your patience: in good time. 75

_Caius._ By gar, you are de coward, de Jack dog, John ape.

_Evans._ [_Aside to Caius_] Pray you, let us not be laughing-stocks to other men's humours; I desire you in friendship, and I will one way or other make you amends. 80 [_Aloud_] I will knog your urinals about your knave's cogs...o...b..[for missing your meetings and appointments].

_Caius._ Diable!--Jack Rugby,--mine host de Jarteer,--have I not stay for him to kill him? have I not, at de place I did appoint? 85

_Evans._ As I am a Christians soul, now, look you, this is the place appointed: I'll be judgement by mine host of the Garter.

_Host._ Peace, I say, Gallia and Gaul, French and Welsh, soul-curer and body-curer! 90

_Caius._ Ay, dat is very good; excellent.