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"I never knew a servant who would not tell a lie," said Florimel.
"I was brought up a fisherman," said Malcolm.
"And," Florimel went on, "I have heard my father say no gentleman ever told a lie."
"Then Lord Liftore is no gentleman," said Malcolm. "But I am not going to plead my own cause even to you, my lady. If you can doubt me, do. I have only one thing more to say: that when I told you and my Lady Clementina about the fisher girl and the gentleman--"
"How dare you refer to that again? Even you ought to know there are things a lady cannot hear. It is enough you affronted me with that before Lady Clementina--and after foolish boasts on my part of your good breeding! Now you bring it up again, when I cannot escape your low talk!"
"My lady, I am sorrier than you think; but which is worse--that you should hear such a thing spoken of, or make a friend of the man who did it--and that is Lord Liftore?"
Florimel turned away, and gave her seeming attention to the moonlit waters, sweeping past the swift sailing cutter.
Malcolm's heart ached for her: he thought she was deeply troubled.
But she was not half so shocked as he imagined. Infinitely worse would have been the shock to him could he have seen how little the charge against Liftore had touched her. Alas! evil communications had already in no small degree corrupted her good manners. Lady Bellair had uttered no bad words in her hearing: had softened to decency every story that required it; had not unfrequently tacked a worldly wise moral to the end of one; and yet, and yet, such had been the tone of her telling, such the allotment of laughter and lamentation, such the acceptance of things as necessary, and such the repudiation of things as Quixotic, puritanical, impossible, that the girl's natural notions of the lovely and the clean had got dismally shaken and confused.
Happily it was as yet more her judgment than her heart that was perverted. But had she spoken out what was in her thoughts as she looked over the great wallowing water, she would have merely said that for all that Liftore was no worse than other men. They were all the same. It was very unpleasant; but how could a lady help it? If men would behave so, were by nature like that, women must not make themselves miserable about it. They need ask no questions.
They were not supposed to be acquainted with the least fragment of the facts, and they must cleave to their ignorance, and lay what blame there might be on the women concerned. The thing was too indecent even to think about.
Ostrich-like they must hide their heads--close their eyes and take the vice in their arms--to love, honour, and obey, as if it were virtue's self, and men as pure as their demands on their wives.
There are thousands that virtually reason thus: Only ignore the thing effectually, and for you it is not. Lie right thoroughly to yourself, and the thing is gone. The lie destroys the fact. So reasoned Lady Macbeth--until conscience at last awoke, and she could no longer keep even the smell of the blood from her. What need Lady Lossie care about the fisher girl, or any other concerned with his past, so long as he behaved like a gentleman to her!
Malcolm was a foolish meddling fellow, whose interference was the more troublesome that it was honest
She stood thus gazing on the waters that heaved and swept astern, but without knowing that she saw them, her mind full of such nebulous matter as, condensed, would have made such thoughts as I have set down. And still and ever the water rolled and tossed away behind in the moonlight.
"Oh, my lady!" said Malcolm, "what it would be to have a soul as big and as clean as all this!"
She made no reply, did not turn her head, or acknowledge that she heard him, a few minutes more she stood, then went below in silence, and Malcolm saw no more of her that night.
CHAPTER LII: HOPE CHAPEL
It was Sunday, during which Malcolm lay at the point of death some three stories above his sister's room. There, in the morning, while he was at the worst, she was talking with Clementina, who had called to see whether she would not go and hear the preacher of whom he had spoken with such fervour. Florimel laughed.
"You seem to take everything for gospel Malcolm says, Clementina!"
"Certainly not," returned Clementina, rather annoyed. "Gospel nowadays is what n.o.body disputes and n.o.body heeds; but I do heed what Malcolm says, and intend to find out, if I can, whether there is any reality in it. I thought you had a high opinion of your groom!"
"I would take his word for anything a man's word can be taken for,"
said Florimel.
"But you don't set much store by his judgment?"
"Oh, I daresay he's right. But I don't care for the things you like so much to talk with him about. He's a sort of poet, anyhow, and poets must be absurd. They are always either dreaming or talking about their dreams. They care nothing for the realities of life.
No--if you want advice, you must go to your lawyer or clergyman, or some man of common sense, neither groom nor poet."
"Then, Florimel, it comes to this--that this groom of yours is one of the truest of men, and one who possessed your father's confidence, but you are so much his superior that you are capable of judging him, and justified in despising his judgment."
"Only in practical matters, Clementina."
"And duty towards G.o.d is with you such a practical matter that you cannot listen to anything he has got to say about it."
Florimel shrugged her shoulders.
"For my part, I would give all I have to know there was a G.o.d worth believing in."
"Clementina!"
"What?"
"Of course there is a G.o.d. It is very horrible to deny it."
"Which is worse--to deny it, or to deny him? Now, I confess to doubting it--that is, the fact of a G.o.d; but you seem to me to deny G.o.d himself, for you admit there is a G.o.d--think it very wicked to deny that, and yet you don't take interest enough in him to wish to learn anything about him. You won't think, Florimel. I don't fancy you ever really think."
Florimel again laughed.
"I am glad," she said, "that you don't judge me incapable of that high art. But it is not so very long since Malcolm used to hint something much the same about yourself, my lady!"
"Then he was quite right," returned Clementina. "I am only just beginning to think, and if I can find a teacher, here I am, his pupil."
"Well, I suppose I can spare my groom quite enough to teach you all he knows," Florimel said, with what Clementina took for a marked absence of expression. She reddened. But she was not one to defend herself before her principles.
"If he can, why should he not?" she said. "But it was of his friend Mr Graham I was thinking---not himself."
"You cannot tell whether he has got anything to teach you."
"Your groom's testimony gives likelihood enough to make it my duty to go and see. I intend to find the place this evening."
"It must be some little ranting methodist conventicle. He would not be allowed to preach in a church, you know."
"Of course not! The church of England is like the apostle that forbade the man casting out devils, and got forbid himself for it --with this difference that she won't be forbid. Well, she chooses her portion with Dives and not Lazarus. She is the most arrant respecter of persons I know, and her Christianity is worse than a farce. It was that first of all that drove me to doubt. If I could find a place where everything was just the opposite, the poorer it was the better I should like it. It makes me feel quite wicked to hear a smug parson reading the gold ring and the goodly apparel, while the pew openers beneath are ill.u.s.trating in dumb show the very thing the apostle is pouring out the vial of his indignation upon over their heads;--doing it calmly and without a suspicion, for the parson, while he reads, is rejoicing in his heart over the increasing aristocracy of his congregation. The farce is fit to make a devil in torment laugh."
Once more, Florimel laughed aloud.
"Another revolution, Clementina, and we shall have you heading the canaille to destroy Westminster Abbey."
"I would follow any leader to destroy falsehood," said Clementina.
"No canaille will take that up until it meddles with their stomachs or their pew rents."
"Really, Clementina, you are the worst Jacobin I ever heard talk.
My groom is quite an aristocrat beside you."
"Not an atom more than I am. I do acknowledge an aristocracy-- but it is one neither of birth nor of intellect nor of wealth."
"What is there besides to make one?"