The Lunatic at Large Part 42

"A gentleman, I believe."

"No other occupation?"

"Not unless you can call a justice of the peace such," replied Mr Bunker, with a smile.

"And yet he disguises himself as a clergyman!" exclaimed Welsh, triumphantly, turning to the proprietor.

Mr Bunker saw that he was caught, but he merely laughed, and observed, "My friend here disguises himself in liquor, a much less respectable cloak."

Unfortunately the humour of this remark was somewhat thrown away on his present audience; indeed, coming from a professed clergyman, it produced an unfavourable impression.

"You are not a clergyman?" said the proprietor, suspiciously.

"I am glad to say I am not," replied Mr Bunker, frankly.

"Den vat do you do in dis dress?"

"I put it on as a compliment to the cloth; I retain it at present for decency," said Mr Bunker, whose tongue had now got a fair start of him.

"Mad," remarked Welsh, confidentially, shrugging his shoulders with really excellent dramatic effect.

By this time the audience were disposed to agree with him.

"You can give no better account of yourself dan dis?" asked the proprietor.

"I am anxious to," replied Mr Bunker, "but a public restaurant is not the place in which I choose to give it."

"Fetch the cab and the policeman," said Welsh to a waiter.

At this moment another gentleman entered the room, and at the sight of him Mr Bunker's face brightened, and he stopped the waiter by a cry of, "Wait one moment; here comes a gentleman who knows me."

Everybody turned, and beheld a burly, very fashionably dressed young man, with a fair moustache and a cheerful countenance.

"Ach, Bonker!" he cried.

This confirmation of Mr Bunker's _aliases_ ought, one would expect, to have delighted the two conspirators, but, instead, it produced the most remarkable effect. Twiddel utterly collapsed, while even Welsh's impudence at last deserted him. Neither said a word as the Baron von Blitzenberg greeted his friend with affectionate heartiness.

"My friend, zis is good for ze heart! Bot, how? vat makes it here?"

"My dear Baron, the most unfortunate mistake has occurred. Two men here--"

But at this moment he stopped in great surprise, for the Baron was staring hard first at Welsh and then at Twiddel.

"Ah!" he exclaimed, "Mr Mandell-Essington, I zink?"

Welsh hesitated for an instant, and his hesitation was evident to all.

Then he replied, "No, you are mistaken."

"Surely I cannot be; you did stay in Fogelschloss?" said the Baron. "Is not zis Dr Twiddel?"

"No-er-ah-yes," stammered Twiddel, looking feebly at Welsh.

The Baron looked from the one to the other in great perplexity, when Mr Bunker, who had been much puzzled by this conversation, broke in, "Did you call that person Mandell-Essington?"

"I cairtainly zought it vas."

"Where did you meet him?"

"In Bavaria, at my own castle."

"You are mistaken, sir," said Welsh.

"One moment, Mr Welsh," said Mr Bunker. "How long ago was this, Baron?"

"Jost before I gom to London. He travelled viz zis ozzer gentleman, Dr Twiddel."

"You are wrong, sir," persisted Welsh.

"For his health," added the Baron.

A light began to dawn on Mr Bunker.

"His health?" he cried, and then smiled politely at Welsh.

"We will talk this over, Mr Welsh."

"I am sorry I happen to be going," said Welsh, taking his hat and coat.

"What, without your lunatic?" asked Mr Bunker.

"That is Dr Twiddel's affair, not mine. Kindly let me pa.s.s, sir."

"No, Mr Welsh; if you go now, it will be in the company of that policeman you were so anxious to send for." There was such an unmistakable threat in Mr Bunker's voice and eye that Welsh hesitated. "We will talk it over, Mr Welsh," Mr Bunker repeated distinctly. "Kindly sit down. I have several things to ask you and your friend Dr Twiddel."

Muttering something under his breath, Welsh hung up his coat and hat, sat down, and then a.s.suming an air of great impudence, remarked, "Fire away, Mr Mandell-Essington-Beveridge-Bunker, or whatever you call yourself."

Without paying the slightest attention to this piece of humour, Mr Bunker turned to the bewildered proprietor, and, to the intense disappointment of the audience, said, "You can leave us now, thank you; our talk is likely to be of a somewhat private nature." As their gallery withdrew, he drew up a chair for the Baron, and all four sat round the small table.

"Now," said Mr Bunker to Welsh, "you will perhaps be kind enough to give me a precise account of your doings since the middle of November."

"I'm d--d if I do," replied Welsh.

"Sare," interposed the Baron in his stateliest manner, "I know not now who you may be, but I see you are no gentleman. Ven you are viz gentlemen-and n.o.blemen-you vill please to speak respectfully."

The stare that Welsh attempted in reply was somewhat ineffective.

"Perhaps, Dr Twiddel, you can give the account I want?" said Mr Bunker.

The poor doctor looked at his friend, hesitated, and finally stammered out, "I-I don't see why."