The Live Corpse Part 11

What can I say to the choir? Gallivanting with a beggar--what can you get out of him?

MaSHA. I don't gallivant! I love this gentleman, that's all. I've not left the choir. I'll go on singing, and what ...

IVaN. Say another word, and I'll pull the hair off your head!...

s.l.u.t!... Who behaves like that? Not your father, nor your mother, nor your aunt!... It's bad, sir! We were fond of you--often and often we sang to you without pay. We pitied you, and what have you done?

NASTaSIA. You've ruined our daughter for nothing ... our own, our only daughter, the light of our eyes, our priceless jewel--you've trodden her into the mire, that's what you've done! You've no conscience.

FeDYA. Nastasia Ivanovna, you suspect me falsely. Your daughter is like a sister to me. I care for her honour. You must think no evil ... but I love her! What is one to do?

IVaN. But you didn't love her when you had money! If you'd then subscribed ten thousand roubles or so to the choir, you might have had her honourably. But now you've squandered everything, and carry her off by stealth! It's a shame, sir, a shame!

MaSHA. He has not carried me off! I came to him myself, and if you take me away now, I shall come back again. I love him, and there's an end of it! My love is stronger than all your locks ... I won't!

NASTaSIA. Come, Masha dearest! Come, my own! Don't sulk. You've done wrong, and now come along.

IVaN. Now then, you've talked enough! March! [Seizes her hand] Excuse us, sir! [Exit the three gipsies].

Enter Prince Abrezkov.

PRINCE ABReZKOV. Excuse me. I have been an unwilling witness of an unpleasant scene....

FeDYA. Whom have I the honour?... [Recognises the Prince] Ah, Prince Abrezkov! [They shake hands].

PRINCE ABReZKOV. An unwilling witness of an unpleasant scene. I should have been glad not to hear, but having overheard it, I consider it my duty to tell you so. I was directed here, and had to wait at the door for those people to come out--more particularly as their very loud voices rendered my knocking inaudible.

FeDYA. Yes, yes--please take a seat. Thank you for telling me: it gives me the right to explain that scene to you. I don't mind what you may think of me, but I should like to tell you that the reproaches you heard addressed to that girl, that gipsy singer, were unjust. That girl is as morally pure as a dove; and my relations with her are those of a friend.

There may be a tinge of romance in them, but it does not destroy the purity--the honour--of the girl. That is what I wished to tell you; but what is it you want of me? In what way can I be of service?

PRINCE ABReZKOV. In the first place, I ...

FeDYA. Forgive me, Prince. My present social standing is such, that my former slight acquaintance with you does not ent.i.tle me to a visit from you, unless you have some business with me. What is it?

PRINCE ABReZKOV. I won't deny it. You have guessed right. I have business with you; but I beg you to believe that the alteration in your position in no wise affects my att.i.tude towards you.

FeDYA. I am sure of it.

PRINCE ABReZKOV. My business is this. The son of my old friend, Anna Dmitrievna Karenina, and she herself, have asked me to ascertain directly from you what are your relations ... May I speak out?... your relations with your wife, Elisabeth Andreyevna Protasova.

FeDYA. My relations with my wife, or rather with her who _was_ my wife, are entirely at an end.

PRINCE ABReZKOV. So I understood, and that is why I accepted this difficult mission.

FeDYA. At an end, and, I hasten to add, not by her fault, but by mine--by my innumerable faults. She is, as she always was, quite irreproachable.

PRINCE ABReZKOV. Well then, Victor Karenin, or rather his mother, asked me to find out what your intentions are.

FeDYA [growing excited] What intentions? I have none. I set her quite free! Moreover, I will never disturb her peace. I know she loves Victor Karenin. Well, let her! I consider him a very dull, but very good and honourable man, and I think that she will, as the phrase goes, be happy with him; and--_que le bon Dieu les benisse_![20] That's all ...

[20] May G.o.d bless them!

PRINCE ABReZKOV. Yes, but we ...

FeDYA [interrupting] And don't suppose that I feel the least bit jealous. If I said that Victor is dull, I withdraw the remark. He is an excellent, honourable, moral man: almost the direct opposite of myself.

And he has loved her from childhood. Perhaps she too may have loved him when she married me--that happens sometimes! The very best love is unconscious love. I believe she always did love him; but as an honest woman she did not confess it even to herself. But ... a shadow of some kind always lay across our family life--but why am I confessing to you?

PRINCE ABReZKOV. Please do! Believe me, my chief reason for coming to you was my desire to understand the situation fully.... I understand you. I understand that the shadow, as you so well express it, may have been ...

FeDYA. Yes, it was; and that perhaps is why I could not find satisfaction in the family life she provided for me, but was always seeking something, and being carried away. However, that sounds like excusing myself. I don't want to, and can't, excuse myself. I was (I say with a.s.surance, _was_) a bad husband. I say _was_, because in my consciousness I am not, and have long not been, her husband. I consider her perfectly free. So there you have my answer to your question.

PRINCE ABReZKOV. Yes, but you know Victor's family, and himself too. His relation to Elisabeth Andreyevna is, and has been all through, most respectful and distant. He a.s.sisted her when she was in trouble ...

FeDYA. Yes, I by my dissipation helped to draw them together. What's to be done? It had to be so!

PRINCE ABReZKOV. You know the strictly Orthodox convictions of that family. Having myself a broader outlook on things, I do not share them; but I respect and understand them. I understand that for him, and especially for his mother, union with a woman without a Church marriage is unthinkable.

FeDYA. Yes, I know his stu ... his strictness, his conservatism in these matters. But what do they want? A divorce? I told them long ago that I am quite willing; but the business of taking the blame on myself, and all the lies connected with it, are very trying....[21]

[21] Under the Russian law divorce was only obtainable if ocular evidence of adultery was forthcoming, and a great deal of perjury was usually involved in such cases.

PRINCE ABReZKOV. I quite understand you, and sympathise. But how can it be avoided? I think it might be arranged that way--but you are right. It is dreadful, and I quite understand you.

FeDYA [pressing the Prince's hand] Thank you, dear Prince! I always knew you were a kind and honourable man. Tell me what to do. How am I to act?

Put yourself in my place. I am not trying to improve. I am a good-for-nothing; but there are things I cannot do quietly. I cannot quietly tell lies.

PRINCE ABReZKOV. I don't understand you! You, a capable, intelligent man, so sensitive to what is good--how can you let yourself be so carried away--so forget what you expect of yourself? How have you ruined your life and come to this?

FeDYA [forcing back tears of emotion] I have led this disorderly life for ten years, and this is the first time a man like you has pitied me!

I have been pitied by my boon-companions, by rakes and by women; but a reasonable, good man like you ... Thank you! How did I come to my ruin?

First, through drink. It is not that drink tastes nice; but do what I will, I always feel I am not doing the right thing, and I feel ashamed.

I talk to you now, and feel ashamed. As for being a _Marechal de la n.o.blesse_, or a Bank Director--I should feel ashamed, so ashamed! It is only when I drink that I do not feel this shame. And music: not operas or Beethoven, but gipsies!... That is life! Energy flows into one's veins! And then those dear black eyes, and those smiles! And the more delicious it is, the more ashamed one feels afterwards.

PRINCE ABReZKOV. How about work?

FeDYA. I have tried it, but it's no good. I am always dissatisfied with it--but what's the use of talking about myself! I thank you.

PRINCE ABReZKOV. Then what am I to say?

FeDYA. Tell them I will do what they wish. They want to get married, and that there should be no obstacle to their marriage?

PRINCE ABReZKOV. Of course.

FeDYA. I'll do it! Tell them I will certainly do it.

PRINCE ABReZKOV. But when?

FeDYA. Wait a bit. Well, say in a fortnight. Will that do?

PRINCE ABReZKOV. Then I may tell them so?