The Letters of Anne Gilchrist and Walt Whitman Part 12

ANNE GILCHRIST TO WALT WHITMAN

_Blaenavon Routzpool Mon. England Jan. 18, '76._

MY DEAREST FRIEND:

Do not think me too wilful or headstrong, but I have taken our tickets & we shall sail Aug. 30 for Philadelphia. I found if I did not come to a decision now, we could not well arrange it before next summer. And since we _have_ come to a decision my mind has been quite at rest. Do not feel any anxiety or misgivings about us. I have a clear and strong conviction I am doing what is right & best for us all. After a busy anxious time I am having a week or two of rest with Percy, who I find fairly well in health & prospering in his business--indeed, he bids fair to have a large private practice as an a.n.a.lyst here, & is already making income enough to marry on, only there is to build the nest--& I think he will have actually to _build_ it, for there seem no eligible houses--& to furnish--so that the wedding will not be till next spring or early summer. Nevertheless, with a definite goal & a definite time & the way between not so very rugged, though rather dull and lonely, I think he will be pretty cheery. This little town (of 11,000 inhabitants, all miners, smelters &c.) lies up among the hills 1100 ft. above the sea--glorious hills here, spreading, then converging, with wooded flanks, & swift brooklets leaping over stones in the hollows--the air, too, of course deliciously light & pure. I have heard through a friend of ours of Bee's fellow student who lives in Camden (Mr. Suerkrop, I think his name is) that we shall be able to get a very comfortable home with pleasant garden there for about 55 per an. I think I can manage that very well--so all I need is to hear of a comfortable lodging or boarding house (the former preferred) where we can be, avoiding hotels even while we hunt for the house. I have arranged for my goods to sail a week later than we do, so as to give us time.

Good-bye for a short while, my dearest Friend.

ANNE GILCHRIST.

Bee has obtained a very satisfactory account of the Women's Medical College in Philadelphia & introductions to the Head, &c.

LETTER x.x.xII

ANNE GILCHRIST TO WALT WHITMAN

_1 Torriano Gardens Camden Rd.

London Feb. 25, '76._

MY DEAREST FRIEND:

I received the paper & enclosed slip Sat.u.r.day week, filling me so full of emotion I could not write, for I am too bitterly impatient of mere words.

Soon, very soon, I come, my darling. I am not lingering, but held yet a little while by the firm grip of conscience--this is the last spring we shall be asunder--O I pa.s.sionately believe there are years in store for us, years of tranquil, tender happiness--me making your outward life serene & sweet--you making my inward life so rich--me learning, growing, loving--we shedding benign influences round us out of our happiness and fulfilled life--Hold on but a little longer for me, my Walt--I am straining every nerve to hasten the day--I have enough for us all (with the simple, unpretending ways we both love best).

Percy is battling slowly--doing as well as we could expect in the time. I think he will soon build the nest for his mate. I think he never in his heart believed I really should go to America, and so it comes as a great blow to him now. You must be very indulgent towards him for my sake, dear friend.

I am glad we know about those rascally book agents--for many of us are wanting a goodish number of copies of the new edition & it is important to understand we may have them straight from you. Rossetti is making a list of the friends & the number, so that they may all come together.

Perhaps, dearest friend, you may be having a great difficulty in getting the books out for want of funds--if so, let me help a little--show your trust in me and my love thus generously.

Your own loving ANNIE.

LETTER x.x.xIII

ANNE GILCHRIST TO WALT WHITMAN

_1 Torriano Gardens March 11, '76._

I have had such joy this morning, my Darling--Poems of yours given in the _Daily News_--sublime Poems one of them reaching dizzy heights, filling my soul with strong delight. These prefaced by a few words, timid enough yet kindly in tone, & better than nothing. The days, the weeks, are slipping by, my beloved, bearing me swiftly, surely to you--before the beauty of the year begins to fade we shall come. The young folk too are full of bright antic.i.p.ation & eagerness now, I am thankful to say; and Percy getting on with, I trust, such near & definite prospect of his happiness that he will be able to pull along cheerily towards it after we are gone, in spite of loneliness.

I expect, Darling, we must go to some little town or village ten or twenty miles short of Philadelphia till the tremendous influx of visitors to the Centennial has ceased, else we shall not be able to find a corner there.--By the bye, I feel a little sulky at your always taking a fling at the poor piano. I see I have got to try & show you it too is capable of waking deep chords in the human soul when it is the vehicle of a great master's thought & emotions--if only my poor fingers prove equal to the task! (All my heart shall go into them.) Take from my picture a long, long look of tender love and joy and faith, deathless, ever young, ever growing, ever learning, aspiring love, tender, cherishing, domestic love.

Oh, may I be full of sweet comfort for my Beloved's Soul and Body through life, through and after death.

ANNE GILCHRIST.

LETTER x.x.xIV

WALT WHITMAN TO ANNE GILCHRIST

_Camden, New Jersey March, 1876._

DEAREST FRIEND:

To your good & comforting letter of Feb. 25th I at once answer, at least with a few lines. I have already written this morning a pretty full letter to Mr. Rossetti (to answer one just rec'd from him) & requested him to loan it you for perusal. In that I have described my situation fully & candidly.

My new edition is printed & ready. Upon receipt of your letter I sent you a set, two Vols. (by Mail, March 15) which you must have rec'd by this time. I wish you to send me word soon as they arrive.

My health, I am encouraged to think, is perhaps a shade better--certainly as well as any time of late.

I even already vaguely contemplate plans (they may never be fulfilled, but yet again they may) of changes, journeys--even of coming to London & seeing you, visiting my friends, &c. My dearest friend, _I do not approve your American trans-settlement. I see so many things here you have no idea of--the social, and almost every other kind of crudeness, meagreness, here (at least in appearance)._

_Don't do anything towards it nor resolve in it nor make any move at all in it without further advice from me. If I should get well enough to voyage, we will talk about it yet in London._

You must not be uneasy about me--dearest friend, I get along much better than you think for. As to the literary situation here, my rejection by the coteries and the poverty (which is the least of my troubles), am not sure but I enjoy them all--besides, as to the latter, I am not in want.

LETTER x.x.xV

ANNE GILCHRIST TO WALT WHITMAN

_1 Torriano Gardens Camden Rd., London March 30, '76._

Yesterday _was_ a day for me, dearest Friend. In the morning your letter, strong, cheerful, rea.s.suring--dear letter. In the afternoon the books. I don't know how to settle down my thoughts calmly enough to write, nor how to lay down the books (with delicate yet serviceable exterior, with inscription making me so proud, so joyous). But there are a few things I want to say to you at once in regard to our coming to America. I will not act without "further advice from you"; but as to not resolving on it, dear friend, I can't exactly obey that, for it has been my settled, steady purpose (resting on a deep, strong faith) ever since 1869. Nor do I feel discouraged or surprised at what you say of American "crudeness," &c. (of which, in truth, one hears not a little in England). I have not shut my eyes to the difficulties and trials & responsibilities (for the children's sake) of the enterprise. I am not urged on by any discontent with old England or by any adverse circ.u.mstances here which I might hope to better there: my reasons, emotions, the sources of my strength and courage for the uprooting & transplanting--all are inclosed in those two volumes that lie before me on the table. That America has brought them forth makes me want to plant some, at least, of my children on her soil. I understand & believe in & love her in & through them. They teach me to look beneath the surface & to get hints of the great future that is shaping itself out of the crude present, & I believe we shall prove to be of the right sort to plant down there.--O to talk it all over with you, dearest Friend, here in London first; I feel as if that would really be--the joy, the comfort, of that. I cannot finish this to-day but send what I have written without delay that you may know of the safe arrival of the books. With reverent, grateful love from us all.

ANNE GILCHRIST.

LETTER x.x.xVI