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The dead earnestness in his pale eyes chilled her. "Last thing I'd ever joke about."
She couldn't believe his blase tone. "Who knows about this?"
He cast his gaze around the three of them. "You three, Venik, the surgeon who set it, and Syn, who tried once to burn or dig it out."
"And he couldn't?"
Fain shook his head at her question. "Had he gotten to it within a few days of the implantation, he might have been able to extract it. But it grew into my brain fast. Extracting it or burning it out now would kill me instantly."
So he was still enslaved to Venik, with no real freedom. That's what Jayne had hinted at when she'd said Fain's life hadn't been a picnic, either.
What else was he hiding?
"Why would Venik do that to you?" Talyn asked.
Fain let out an exasperated breath before he answered. "He thinks it's hilarious to own a member of the famed War Hauk lineage as his personal pet." He met Galene's gaze and the torment behind that blank expression made her stomach ache for him. "It seems Keris was right, after all. My only purpose in life is to serve as an attack dog."
Galene winced at his dry tone as those words took her back in time to when Fain had been accepted into the North Eris Medical Academy. He'd been so excited when their counselor had given him the news at school. Less than one percent of applicants were ever accepted into their prestigious program. It was the hardest medical school in the entire Nine Worlds to get into. And unlike her, Fain had done it without a prestigious medical family background to rely on.
He'd done it on his own, with no help from anyone. Just like Talyn's Felicia.
Ecstatic that his hard work and extra hours after school had paid off, Fain had run all the way home to tell his parents the incredible news.
When Galene had called him later, his happiness had vanished completely. He'd worn that carefully guarded, jaw-locked expression he always held around his parents, grandparents, and older brother.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
His curtness had wounded her. "So what did your parents say about your acceptance letter? My father is thrilled to have-"
"I'm not going to med school with you, Galene."
"What? Why?"
"War Hauks aren't doctors. It was a stupid thought."
She'd scowled at him over the link. "I don't understand. You worked so hard to get in. You took all those advanced cla.s.ses... It's what you wanted to do. All you ever wanted to be."
Keris's bitter laughter had echoed in the background. "Don't be ridiculous. They only let him in so that they could brag about having a War Hauk on their attendance roll. Fain's an idiot. Only thing he's ever been good at is getting his a.s.s kicked and being an attack dog. Last thing any Andarion wants is something as dumb as him treating them when they need a real doctor."
Fain's eyes had been as dead then as they were now while he stared at her. "My father signed me up for my obligatory service this afternoon. I'll be entering the military this fall."
Galene saw that hurt boy now in the fierce male before her. Still defiant in the face of those out to own him and force him into a life he'd never had any say in.
Closing the distance between them, she rested her chin on his shoulder and placed her hand at his hip. "You are not a dog, Fain."
Fain savored those words as much as he savored the way she held him.
Like she used to.
For a moment, he wasn't the cybernetic animal Venik and the others had turned him into. He felt Andarion again. Like he had control of his future.
Strange how out of all the beings in his life who'd sought to own and control him, the only one he'd ever wanted to give himself over to was her.
And she was the only one who'd refused to ever control him.
Not wanting to think about that, he flew them back to the station, where an entire squad of Hadean Corps soldiers waited for their arrival. Unfortunately, by the time he saw them, the comptrollers had possession of his ship and everything was locked down to drag him into the bay.
b.l.o.o.d.y minsid h.e.l.l...
Fain ground his teeth at what that meant for him.
Talyn unbuckled himself and moved to stand by his side to stare out at the armed enforcers. "What's that about?"
s.h.i.t to come.
"They're Hadean Corps. Tavali enforcement."
"Yeah?" Talyn prompted.
Fain didn't say anything more as he shut down his engines and opened the hatch. "Don't worry. It has nothing to do with you or your mother." His stomach cramped with anger, he headed down the ramp.
Sure enough, the captain of the Corps came forward.
"Commander Hauk, you're being remanded into custody, pending investigation and hearing."
Galene gasped. She rushed toward them. "What's the meaning of this?"
The captain cuffed Fain's hands behind his back. "It's Tavali business."
"Fain?"
He met her gaze and offered her a teasing grin. "Just answer their questions honestly, keramia."
Galene stood in stunned shock as they hauled Fain away and he didn't protest.
Kareem Venik came forward to greet her. "Commander? Would you mind answering a few questions?"
Talyn stepped between them. "She doesn't go anywhere without her escort."
Kareem nodded. "Fair enough. Please, follow me."
Galene trailed after Kareem, while Gavarian and Talyn provided a tight shadow to her. With every step they took toward the lockup center for the station, her fear for Fain tripled. "What's all this about? Why did they arrest Commander Hauk?"
"I'm not at liberty to discuss that with witherwins."
"Witherwins?"
"Non-Tavali." Kareem paused at an office and opened the door. He allowed them to enter first. By the expression on his face, she could tell he, too, was bothered by what was happening.
So she decided to try a more motherly approach. "Kareem? I know you consider Fain family. Please... I don't want to see him hurt or in trouble. What can I do to help?"
He glanced nervously toward a corner. The furtive gaze made her wonder if they were being watched or recorded. "If you don't mind, Commander, I'll ask the questions." He gestured for her to have a seat.
She sat down as Talyn and Gavarian took positions behind her. She had to give Kareem credit that their stern glowers didn't send him fleeing. Lesser creatures would have lost their nerve. Or at the very least, control of their bladders. Especially given the scornful sneer on Talyn's face that promised a sound beating should the wrong word fall from the Tavali's lips.
With exception of clearing his throat, Kareem betrayed no sign of discomfort. "Commander? Um... can you lead me through your attack? I need to file a report on what exactly happened during the fight. I just need your debriefing on what led to the encounter and what actions Commander Hauk took during and after it. You're not in any kind of trouble. This is a routine report. Nothing more."
Yeah, right. She knew better. His careful tone and rigid manner belied those words. "Commander Hauk and I were flying out to try and signal his brother when we were attacked."
"Why were you out there? Why not contact his brother from the base?"
"That's Sentella business."
"Yes, but you didn't have to leave the station for that."
She arched her brow at his tone. "Are you accusing me of something?"
"No, Commander. Just curious why you left, is all. Seems strange."
"And as the Alliance commander, I don't answer to you. If your father has questions, he can take them up with me himself." She rose.
"Wait, Commander, please. I didn't mean to offend you. But there is one more thing I do have to ask you."
"That is?"
"Are you a trained and licensed pilot?"
Fain crossed his arms over his chest as he stared through the plasma bars at Venik. Completely calm and uncaring about his owner's fury, he blinked slowly and methodically. Then he cursed as his nose started bleeding again. From experience, he knew it'd be plaguing him like this for days to come.
As would the current headache that throbbed like a mother.
He'd never wanted the neural implants. Ven had forced this s.h.i.t on him. Now he wanted to hang him with it.
Typical.
Fain wiped the blood away and dared Ven with his gaze to say anything about it.
Curling his lip, Venik started forward, then remembered the bars that would have seared him had he made the mistake of touching them. "Have you any idea the s.h.i.tstorm you could bring down on both our a.s.ses for that stunt you pulled? You owe me, Hauk! Or have you forgotten how I found you?"
Fain laughed bitterly at the reminder Venik threw in his face every time they locked horns. "Yeah, I remember that day. How could I ever forget you dragging me out of my confinement cell by my hair, with my hands shackled behind my back, then shooting out both my knees before you held me down on the ground with your foot on my throat, and bragged to your crew about how easy it was to quell a mighty War Hauk kid who was already half dead from starvation and months of being brutally beaten by his slavers. Yeah, Ven, you were some big f.u.c.king awesome Tavali bada.s.s who defeated my worn-out piece-of-s.h.i.t hide." He clapped sarcastically. "As always, I am in awe of your awesome fighting skills."
Venik pulled out the trigger for Fain's implant and held it up for him to see it. "I should have killed you."
"Probably." Fain gestured at the small trigger. "Still not too late. You wouldn't even have to get your hands dirty." He glanced at the drab gray walls. "Place could use a bright splash of color. Nothing better than brain matter on steel to put the fear of the G.o.ds in your enemies. Go for it."
For a full minute, he thought he might have finally pushed Venik too far.
But just as Venik started to press the release to kill him, he growled and returned it to his pocket. "I don't know why I tolerate you."
"I'm the only one who tells you the truth. Without fear."
A tic started in Venik's jaw while he stared at Fain as if trying to see into his soul.
After a long wait, he finally hit the release for the bars. "Yeah, you crave nothing. Never have. All the years I've known you, you've never asked me for anything except time away from service to see to your brother's needs. Never anything for yourself. It's why I don't believe the lies someone's spewing against your honor. But trust doesn't come easy to me and you know that. You know why. As you said, you have plenty of reason to hate me. More than most. And I understand that, too. I did things to you that I regret in hindsight. Unfortunately, I can't change what I did to you because I hated others. We both have to live with my mistakes, and for that I am sorry. I met you at a bad place in my life. And you paid for a hatred that wasn't yours." Ven let out a heavy sigh. "But don't make me have to kill you, Hauk. End of the day, I will do it if I have to. You know I will."
Fain snorted. "Now you're just trying to turn me on. Don't make promises to me you're not going to keep. That's just wrong, Ven."
Venik rolled his eyes. "You're a sick b.a.s.t.a.r.d."
Without commenting on something they both knew was true, Fain took his gear from Venik and strapped his blasters to his hips as he headed back toward the hangar.
But as he left the retention area, he almost collided with Galene, who was waiting in the hallway.
He froze at the sight of her. And at the tender expression on her face.
"Was all that true?"
"What? That I'm an a.s.shole? Yeah. It's what everyone keeps telling me. Talyn said he even took a survey and everyone agreed unanimously on that one core fact about my personality." He expected her to duplicate Venik's expression and sounds of irritation, but for once, she disappointed him.
Instead, she reached up to brush the braids back from his face and cup his cheek in a tender gesture of affection. She traced the line of his eyebrow with her thumb. "It amazes me how similar you and your son are to have had no contact with each other. My two little lorina twins."
Those words choked him. It was the first time she'd really called Talyn his, without it being meant to hurt him. "So we both chafe your a.s.s, huh?"
She sighed with a light smile at that. "At times... Talyn, like you, verbally shoves everyone back to protect himself. If he goads them into rejecting him first, then he controls the rejection. That way, when they insult him for things he can't help, it doesn't bother him. He feels as if he earned it and he can accept their hostility and judgment without pain. Just like you always did as a boy."
Fain fell silent as he realized how right she was. As a War Hauk on Andaria, he'd been judged by everyone. Because of his family's fame and legacy, and Keris's overachievements, so much had been expected of him that it'd been hard to function, especially as a kid. That was part of what had led to Keris's drug addiction. They were all walking freaks of nature. Everyone stared at them. Wanted to meet and touch them.
Wanted to put them down and show that he and his brothers weren't any better than anyone else. And they weren't. They'd never said they were.
Yes, they were the direct descendants of the celebrated family that had held off foreign invaders, and paid for it with their lives, but in his mind, in the minds of their family, that was what Andarions did.
All Andarions.
It didn't make them special. It was just expected. They fought when confronted. No matter the size of the enemy. Unfortunately, the rest of the Androkyn didn't feel that way. They'd swung between hostile and rude, or worshipful and frightening.
Keris had found comfort from the pressure of that condemnation and expectation in drugs. Dancer had found solace in befriending their prince, who was an even bigger freak than they were. And so Dancer's fame had been deflected to Jullien, whose notoriety and life under a biting microscope outshone his.
Caught between them in age, Fain had been hung out to dry. The only place of comfort he'd ever known was in the arms of the female in front of him. Galene had never judged him by his family or lineage. She, alone, had seen him for who and what he really was. And after she'd left, he'd had no one at all.
Now the warmth of her hand seared his skin. And with it came a surge of raw misery that washed over him as he stepped back, out of her reach. "Don't, Galene."
She scowled at him. "Don't what?"
"Don't show me the light and then d.a.m.n me back to the darkness." He couldn't mentally handle it again. It'd taken him too long to get to a place where he could function without her.
Too long to find peace in a universe that begrudged him a life he'd never asked for.