The Follies of Love Part 6

Albert I cannot express my feeling of obligation. May it be more safe than my fortune or my life.

(Exit Albert.)

Scratch Go, I know nothing, and she won't be cured.

Worthy What made you say that? What happy fate made you become a physician in his eyes?

Scratch Word of honor, I know nothing about it. What I can tell you, is that as soon as I saw him, after he intercepted me, to disguise my plan and hide myself the better, I told him I was looking for some medicinal herbs hereabouts, and that I had admirable secret cures for all sorts of ills, and, in short, could cure, the incurable. And that's exactly how he made his mistake.

Worth We must profit by it now. In my heart, I feel the rebirth of hope and joy. Come, let's consider--and see by what means we can succeed in our n.o.ble project and bring forth your brilliant medicinal art and secret remedies.

Scratch Me? I'm ready for anything. But, it's useless to undertake a project without the first ingredient. We have no money. Who will give us any?

Worthy (showing the letter) Love will provide for us.

Scratch Love will provide it? It seems as though billet douxs have become bills of exchanges. Strange.

CURTAIN

ACT III.

Scene: Same as Act II, later that day towards dusk.

(Enter Worthy.)

Worthy I keep returning and going over all I intend to do. How can a witty girl, so reasonable and sensible, when love seizes her, be able to display her genius and her pa.s.sion at the very same time? For my part, I owe it all the consideration love can think of. Scratch is prepared for all he must do. Some help with money will be necessary for us.

(Enter Albert.)

Albert I cannot stay in this place a single moment. I come, I go, I run about. Everything increases my torment. Near her, my wit is troubled like hers. Her access of madness redoubles every moment. (seeing Worthy) Ah, sir, am I sufficiently numbered amongst those who are considered your friends that I can rely on the aid you have promised me? Will this man who boasted to me of his talents use his experience?

In the state I am in, I ought to consent to anything: when one loves completely one takes all risks.

Worthy I take it as a pleasure to do you this good turn. At all times one ought to do good deeds. Today's patient made me pity her too much for me not to show you signs of friendship. The man in question will be here soon. I wanted to test him and understand his knowledge of this malady. But he spoke to me in terms so precise, explaining to me the cause and effect, that in all truth, I believe he knows more than anyone else.

Albert Sir, what service can equal yours? Heaven itself, effortlessly, sent this person here--expressly to oblige me.

Worthy I won't guarantee this profound science. You know that these people come from all over like Gypsies, carrying treasured remedies for all sorts of ills. It's much, if they don't claim to have resuscitated the dead; but if one can judge what he can do from what he told me--this is the man for your business. He only wants to wait till sundown. If you wish it, you may test him. Thus, I discharge my duty as a friend.

Albert Sir, I am persuaded of his merit. Everyday we see how this sort of man learns secrets from traveling the world over.

(Enter Jenny.)

Jenny Ah, heaven! You are about to witness another perfect folly. If it continues, you'll have to tie her up.

(Enter Arabella, her hair is completely grey, her clothes disheveled.)

Arabella Good day, sweet friends, G.o.d protect ye, my children! Well, what is it? How do you spend your time? May heaven send you health for a long time, and keep you strong and happy. Sorrow's no good and frets the spirit. You have to enjoy yourself, and it's I who say it.

Worthy In spite of her age, I find her charming. One can still look for the return of youth.

Arabella Ho! You look at me--you are amazed to find me so young with grey hair.

I feel better than all of you: I take four meals a day, and I read without gla.s.ses. I drink rum, or whatever is available, stale or fresh. I drink it to the last drop--and I never mix it with water. I genteelly empty my two bottles.

Jenny Plague!

Arabella Yes, truly, some more champagne--without any delay. You can see all my teeth in my mouth. Do you see, I'll be ninety-eight come Easter?

Jenny Her youth is the last straw.

Arabella There's more still. But I am of a green old age. At the age I'm at, I still don't allow myself any servants--besides, they'd charge me too much. But, do you see, my friend, do you want me to tell you? People today, they're shoddy goods--they're not worth anything, and I wouldn't bend over to pick up the lot of them.

Worthy Is she often overcome with these vapors?

Albert Alas, never. She must be bewitched.

Arabella At my age, I am still worth my weight in gold. My children have done me wrong. I don't look half my age. If I hadn't been married at thirteen--to tell you the truth, marriage and childbearing puts an end to youth. Such great peril. I never can remember having been a child.

To tell you the truth, I was pretty enough. At twenty-seven I had fourteen children.

Jenny What fertility! Fourteen!

Arabella Yes, all swarming. And all boys. I've never had any girls. And you see others turn out like ours. But (winking) they're rogues who'll turn out badly. These evil ones wanted to see me in a hospital. Would you believe that after the death of their late father, they squabbled with me over my dower rights? A dower earned so legitimately.

Albert Alas, can one push mental aberration further?

Jenny (aside) My word, the little baggage plays her role charmingly.

Arabella I will need a hundred crowns. Lend them me, sir, to pay for expenses and to bribe the judge in my unfortunate case.

Albert You dream, my child,--but to satisfy you, I will advance expenses and make your case my business.

Arabella If I don't have money today, I'll be in despair.

Albert But think, child--

Arabella You're an honest man. Don't refuse to give me that sum.

Albert I intend to humor her.

Worthy You're wise to do so. You shouldn't contradict her directly.

Jenny If you resist her, she's the type of girl to go throw herself out the window.

Albert I agree.