The Fatal Jealousie (1673) Part 6

_Cael._ My Lord, there are some Tenants, who desire to express Their Loves by Rural Recreations--

_Anto._ Bid e'm stay, their sports are more in season after Dinner.

So willing now to have it read, and yet before so backward!

[Ex. _Cael_.

Why, this confirms me she is false, it was contriv'd On purpose for my sight. The Devil's not so cunning As a Woman.

[Enter Nurse.

Oh, Beldame, are you come? Tell me, you Bawd, Who Wh.o.r.es my Wife? For Wh.o.r.e I know she is, And you're her Bawd. Tell me, I say, the man, The place, the Circ.u.mstance, and very time, Or I will quarter thee, and throw thy flesh to'th' dogs.

_Nurse._ Alas, my Lord, I know nothing, but that when You're from Home, _Pedro_ goes to her Chamber, and Stays there all Night, but what they do, I know Not, for none but _Flora's_ with them.

_Anto._ _Pedro_! Oh monstrous, she would devour a Legion!

Is't every Night, do you say?

_Nurse._ Yes, every Night; but I durst never tell you!

Alas, she suckt these b.r.e.a.s.t.s.

_Anto._ Shew me this Night _Pedro_, in Bed with her, Or I will cut thy Tongue out.

_Nurse._ 'Tis impossible when you are at home.

_Anto._ I will contrive a Journey out of Town, but will at Twelve return, then let me in; for if you fail I'le cut your Throat.

_Nurse._ I'le do my best.

[Exit.

_Anto._ _Pedro_! What sordid Devil prompted her to that?

Why, I am known to all the World a Cuckold; The very Boys i'th' street must point at me; But hold, this new Intelligence struck out the old, And made me quite forget about _Francisco_.

_Enter _Jasper_._

Oh, _Jasper_! I'm confirm'd my Wife's a Devil, And I will send her to the rest e're Morning; Go and contrive a Letter from _Don John_; Shall intimate he's sick, and wants my presence, Then I'le contrive the rest.

_Jasp._ Be not too rash, my Lord, might I advise You should be certain e're you Acted ought.

_Anto._ How can I be more certain then this Night, To be Eye-witness of her l.u.s.t my self, As Nurse has undertook I shall.

_Jasp._ Ay, Sir, but things may fail, and they not meet.

_Anto._ Name a more certain way then.

_Jasp._ My Lord, there lives a Woman in the Suburbs, Mighty in Science, who by Art can tell All that she pleases, I'de have you go to her.

_Anto._ Is she of your acquaintance?

_Jasp._ No, my Lord, she scorns such things as me, She's for the great ones; though for Charity, She sometimes helps poor people to their goods, I'me sure she'd serve your Lordship.

_Anto._ I fear she'l never trust us, lest we should betray Her to the Inquisition.

_Jasp._ No fear of that, she cannot be betray'd, She knows Mens bus'ness er'e they come unto her.

_Anto._ Well then, contrive my absence, I'le go thither, I'm sure to know whether she cheats or no, For if she names _Don Lewis_ 'mongst the rest, I shall believe her. Well, about the Letter.

[Exit.

_Jasp._ Are you there with your Beares; _Don Lewis_ say you?

Marry now I find 'twas Jealousie of his Wife; And not the matter of Money made him kill him, Whether he was guilty or no; I'le be sure he shan't Be forgot, for I'le before hand to my Aunt, and tell Her all; I hope, she is a Witch; the People say so, a Mighty Artist I am sure she is, for she has done Strange things, and all men fear her, besides I Know she loves me, and will strive all she can to Do me good, and hap what will my Lord will Think me honest; for Night will surely shew his Sister to him, drest in's Ladyes Gown, what though He kill her, the mistake will lye o'th' Night, and not On me, thus I make good the Villain that she call'd Me, in my Revenge on her; and if Nurse fails me Not, I'le have my Lady, and _Pedro_; finely firkt.

When this is done, my Lord rewards my care, Let him the danger I'le the profit share.

And since things Excellent commended be, 'Tshall be my Aym t'excell in Villany.

_The End of the first Act._

Act the Second.

_Enter _Jasper_ and the Witch._

_Jasp._ This kindness, Aunt, I beg, your Art must do; For I have no way else to save my place.

_Witch._ Why, 'tis impossible; I've no such Art As People think, to call up Spirits to me; Nor know I any thing, but what is told me.

_Jasp._ Now you dissemble, Aunt, for han't you often Rais'd Storms, have rent up Trees, and shook strong Towers? Seeming to threaten Nature with it's end; And at such times have sent strange shaped Spirits, who have restored to owners stolen Goods.

These things so many know, it is impossible For you to keep it private; but I find, Rather then trust me with your mighty secrets, Or help me with your Art, you'l see my Ruine.

_Witch._ These things you speak of, people think I do, And so I'de have e'm; for tis the only way I have to Live: The Vulgar People love to be deluded; And things the most unlikely they most dote on; A strange Disease in Cattle, Hogs or Pigs, Or any Accident in Cheese or b.u.t.ter; Though't be but Natural, or a s.l.u.ts fault, Must strait be Witchcraft! Oh, the Witch was here!

The Ears or Tail is burn'd, the Churn is burn'd; And this to hurt the Witch, when all the while They're likest Witches that believe such Cures; Could I do all that People think I can, I'de ne're take pains to find out stolen Goods, Or hold intelligence with Thieves to bring e'm, Meerly to get my Bread; no, I would make The Universe pay Tribute to my power, And all the Bug-bear Lords Inquisitors More tremble at my Name then I do now At theirs: Ah, _Jasper_, would I raise Storms when I would, blast Corn, turn Rivers backward Change shapes, mov'd where I pleas'd i'th' Air, And that so fast, as thought it self would Hardly overtake me: What is't I could not do? if all were true The Foolish People think, the Pope himself would Quickly lose Respect, And none be thought infallible but I.

_Jasp._ I'm sure I tremble for your want of power, More then I should to see h.e.l.ls dreadfull'st shape, For I must flye the Town.

_Witch._ _Jasper_, not so; though I can raise no Devils, Yet I Confederate with Rogues and Juglers, Things that can shape themselves like Elves, And Goblins-- And often do like Spirits haunt great Houses, Most times to steal, but many times for mirth; These I'le soon send for; arise, my _Pincula_.

_Enter a little Devil, and tumbles the Summerset._

_Jasp._ Heav'ns bless me! save me, good Aunt.

_Witch._ From what? You Fool, 'tis but a little Boy, Which I instruct to carry on my Cheats: Come, leave your Fooling, I have bus'ness for you; Uncase your self, and quickly go and find _Ranter_, and _Swash_, _Dive_, _Fob_, _Snap_, _Gilt_, and _Pick-lock_, Those are my Archest Devils; as you go Call upon _Dog'rell_ the Ballad-maker, and say I want him strait, bid them be sure To bring home half a dozen more with them, For I shall need their help, let e'm not fail, For money's to be got.

_Devil._ 'Tis that will make e'm come; I'le haste, forsooth.

[Exit.

_Jasp._ I'm glad it's gone, for surely it was a Devil, What ever you pretend.

_Witch._ Thou'rt a Fool: It was a Boy, I tell thee, and no Devil; Nor am I a sorceress, though I could wish To do thee good I was: But 'tis no matter, Bring thou thy Lord, I'le practice well enough To make him think all true, that I shall shew him.

_Jasp._ You now Revive my Drooping Spirits, Aunt, and Make my hopes grow strong! Ah sweet Revenge, How my soul Dances but with thoughts of it; a.s.sist me, Aunt, to get this mighty Blessing, and I Shall dye your slave.

_Witch._ O rare Boy!

How I rejoyce to see this Spirit in thee, For 'tis the vertue of our Family To seek Revenge, not basely swallow wrongs: _Don Sancho De Mensalvo_, thy Grandsire Was for a while Vice-Admiral of Spain, But then disgrac'd turn'd Pyrate and Reveng'd With Fire and Sword on all Mankind, the wrongs He thought the Court had basely plac'd on him; At last he was betray'd and lost his head, Thy Father turn'd Bandetto, what he got I did dispose of for him; but his Fate Betray'd him too to Death by Execution: Since when I by these Arts do strive to live, And thou art forc'd to serve-- That very Lord, who does those Lands Possess should have been thine.