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Andrew could not help vaguely reflecting what kind of money had bought him, if Sandy was right.
Alexa was pleased to see Andrew. He made her feel more comfortable. His presence seemed to protect her a little.
"May I ask you, Mr. Ingram," she said, "to repeat what you were saying about the horse as we came up?"
"I was saying," answered Andrew, "that, to any one who understands a horse it is clear that the power of G.o.d must have flowed un.o.bstructed through many generations to fashion such a perfection."
"Oh! you indorse the development theory--do you?" said George. "I should hardly have expected that of you."
"I do not think it has anything to do with what I said; no one disputes that this horse comes of many generations of horses. The development theory, if I understand aright, concerns itself with how his first ancestor in his own kind came to be a horse."
"And about that there can be no doubt in the mind of any one who believes in the Bible!" said George.
"G.o.d makes beautiful horses," returned Andrew; "whether He takes the one way or the other to make them, I am sure He takes the right way."
"You imply it is of little consequence what you believe about it."
"If I had to make them it would be of consequence. But what I think of consequence to us is--that He makes them, not out of nothing, but out of Himself. Why should my poor notion of G.o.d's _how_ be of importance, so long as, when I see a horse like yours, Mr. Crawford, I say, G.o.d be praised? It is of eternal importance to love the animal, and see in him the beauty of the Lord; it is of none to fancy I know which way G.o.d took to make him. Not having in me the power or the stuff to make a horse, I can not know how G.o.d made the horse; I can know him to be beautiful."
"But," said George, "the first horse was a very common-looking domestic animal, which they kept to eat--nothing like this one."
"Then you think G.o.d made the first horse, and after that the horses made themselves," said Andrew.
Alexa laughed; George said nothing; Andrew went on.
"But," he said, "if we have come up from the lower animals, through a million of kinds, perhaps--against which theory I have nothing to urge--then I am more than prepared to believe that the man who does not do the part of a man will have to go down again, through all the stages of his being, to a position beyond the lowest forms of the powers he has misused, and there begin to rise once more, haunted perhaps with dim hints of the world of humanity left so far above him."
"Bah! What's the use of bothering! Rubbish!" cried George, with rude jollity. "You know as well as I do, Mr. Ingram, it's all bosh! Things will go on as they're doing, and as they have been doing, till now from all eternity--so far as we know, and that's enough for us."
"They will not go on so for long in our sight, Mr. Crawford. The worms will have a word to say with us."
Alexa turned away.
"You've not given up preaching and taken to the practical yet, Mr.
Ingram, I see," said George.
Andrew laughed.
"I flatter myself I have not ceased to be practical, Mr. Crawford. You are busy with what you see, and I am busy as well with what I don't see; but all the time I believe my farm is in as good a state as your books."
George gave a start, and stole a look at the young farmer, but was satisfied he "meant nothing." The self-seeker will walk into the very abyss protesting himself a practical man, and counting him unpractical who will not with him "jump the life to come." Himself, he neither measures the width nor questions his muscle.
CHAPTER XXI.
WHAT IS IT WORTH?
Andrew, with all his hard work, harder since Sandy went, continued able to write, for he neither sought company nor drank strong drink, and was the sport of no pa.s.sion. From threatened inroad he appealed to Him who created to lift His child above the torrent, and make impulse the slave of conscience and manhood. There were no demons riding the whirlwinds of his soul. It is not wonderful then that he should be able to write a book, or that the book should be of genuine and original worth. It had the fortune to be "favorably" reviewed, scarce one of those who reviewed it understanding it, while all of them seemed to themselves to understand it perfectly. I mention the thing because, had the book not been thus reviewed, Alexa would not have bought a copy, or been able to admire it.
The review she read was in a paper whose editor would not have admitted it had he suspected the drift which the reviewer had failed to see; and the pa.s.sages quoted appealed to Alexa in virtue, partly, of her not seeing half they involved, or anything whatever of the said drift. But because he had got a book published, and because she approved of certain lines, phrases and pa.s.sages in it; but chiefly because it had been praised by more than one influential paper, Andrew rose immensely in Alexa's opinion. Although he was the son of a tenant, was even a laborer on his farm, and had covered a birth no higher than that of Jesus Christ with the gown of no university, she began, against her own sense of what was fit, to look up to the plow-man. The plow-man was not aware of this, and would have been careless had he been. He respected his landlord's daughter, not ever questioned her superiority as a lady where he made no claim to being a gentleman, but he recognized in her no power either to help or to hurt.
When they next met, Alexa was no longer indifferent to his presence, and even made a movement in the direction of being agreeable to him. She dropped in a measure, without knowing she had ever used it, her patronizing carriage, but had the a.s.surance to compliment him not merely on the poem he had written, but on the way it had been received; she could not have credited, had he told her, that he was as indifferent to the praise or blame of what is called the public, as if that public were indeed--what it is most like--a boy just learning to read. Yet it is the consent of such a public that makes the very essence of what is called fame. How should a man care for it who knows that he is on his way to join his peers, to be a child with the great ones of the earth, the lovers of the truth, the Doers of the Will. What to him will be the wind of the world he has left behind, a wind that can not arouse the dead, that can only blow about the grave-clothes of the dead as they bury their dead.
"Live, Dawtie," said Andrew to the girl, "and ane day ye'll hae yer hert's desire; for 'Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after righteousness.'"
Andrew was neither annoyed nor gratified with the compliments Alexa paid him, for she did not know the informing power of the book--what he cared for in it--the thing that made him write it. But her gentleness and kindness did please him; he was glad to feel a little at home with her, glad to draw a little nearer to one who had never been other than good to him. And then was she not more than kind, even loving to Dawtie?
"So, Andrew, you are a poet at last," she said, holding out her hand to him, which Andrew received in a palm that wrote the better verse that it was h.o.r.n.y. "Please to remember I was the first that found you out!" she added.
"I think it was my mother," answered Andrew.
"And I would have helped you if you would have let me."
"It is not well, ma'am, to push the bird off because he can't sit safe on the edge of the nest."
"Perhaps you are right A failure then would have stood in the way of your coming fame."
"Oh, for that, ma'am, believe me, I do not care a short straw."
"What do you not care for?"
"For fame."
"That is wrong, Andrew. We ought to care what our neighbors think of us."
"My neighbors did not set me to do the work, and I did not seek their praise in doing it. Their friendship I prize dearly--more than tongue can tell."
"You can not surely be so conceited, Andrew, as to think n.o.body capable of judging your work."
"Far from it, ma'am. But you were speaking of fame, and that does not come from any wise judgment."
"Then what do you write for, if you care nothing for fame? I thought that was what all poets wrote for."
"So the world thinks; and those that do sometimes have their reward."
"Tell me then what you write for?"
"I write because I want to tell something that makes me glad and strong.
I want to say it, and so try to say it. Things come to me in gleams and flashes, sometimes in words themselves, and I want to weave them into a melodious, harmonious whole. I was once at an oratorio, and that taught me the shape of a poem. In a pause of the music, I seemed all at once to see Handel's heavy countenance looking out of his great wig, as he sat putting together his notes, ordering about in his mind, and fixing in their places with his pen, his drums, and pipes, and fiddles, and roaring ba.s.s, and flageolets, and hautboys--all to open the door for the thing that was plaguing him with the confusion of its beauty. For I suppose even Handel did not hear it all clear and plain at first, but had to build his orchestra into a mental organ for his mind to let itself out by, through the many music holes, lest it should burst with its repressed harmonic delights. He must have felt an agonized need to set the haunting angels of sound in obedient order and range, responsive to the soul of the thing, its one ruling idea! I saw him with his white rapt face, looking like a prophet of the living G.o.d sent to speak out of the heart of the mystery of truth! I saw him as he sat staring at the paper before him, scratched all over as with the fury of a holy anger at his own impotence, and his soul communed with heavenliest harmonies!
Ma'am, will any man persuade me that Handel at such a moment was athirst for fame? or that the desire to please a house full or world full of such as heard his oratorios, gave him the power to write his music? No, ma'am! he was filled, not with the longing for sympathy, and not even with the good desire to give delight, but with the music itself. It was crying in him to get out, and he heard it crying, and could not rest till he had let it out; and every note that dropped from his pen was a chip struck from the granite wall between the song-birds in their prison-nest, and the air of their liberty. Creation is G.o.d's self-wrought freedom. No, ma'am, I do not despise my fellows, but neither do I prize the judgment of more than a few of them. I prize and love themselves, but not their opinion."
Alexa was silent, and Andrew took his leave. She sat still for awhile thinking. If she did not understand, at least she remembered Andrew's face as he talked: could presumption make his face shine so? could presumption make him so forget himself?