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Starsa started to ask, "What's wrong-"
Suddenly the floor lurched under them. Even unbalanced, Starsa dove for her gerontometer and caught it before it could hit the ground.
"What was that?" Jayme asked, afraid of what it might be.
Starsa settled her gerontometer back on the desk. "It felt like the graviton array went out of synch for a microsecond."
"Maybe it's another tremor," Jayme suggested, holding her breath.
Another jolt shook the floor. Starsa was ready that time, and she cushioned her precious device safely on the bed. "That's no tremor. That's a system failure-"
The yellow alert began to flash, and the computer announced, "Yellow alert! Emergency personnel to their stations."
Starsa made sure her gerontometer wouldn't be knocked off the bed. "I'm supposed to go to the environmental support substation this week. I think ... what about you?"
Jayme was already heading out the door. "I've got to get down to the graviton conduit chamber."
"See you later," Starsa called merrily. Jayme wondered how someone could be that oblivious about people and still be such a great mechanical genius. Then she remembered Barclay, who was not very personable himself, but she sincerely hoped he was working on whatever was going wrong down there.
The jolting continued to rock the decks of Jupiter Research Station as Jayme rapidly made her way down to the graviton chamber. Personnel were rushing to their alert stations, purposefully crossing paths. Strictly speaking, Jayme wasn't supposed to be belowdecks, but she grabbed a kit from the rack and followed a work crew down the access ladder, crossing her fingers that they wouldn't notice an extra person.
"This valve hasn't been vented in three days!" Ensign Dshed exclaimed, leaning over to check the gauge.
"This one hasn't either," a technician further down the conduit confirmed.
"The graviton distortion waves are phasing into synch," Barclay informed them, concentrating on his tricorder. "We better get these valves vented fast!"
Jayme grabbed a siphon and ran to check the next valve. It wasn't vented either. In all, more than half a dozen valves in the section hadn't been vented. They were throwing off the synch of the entire array. She hung onto the conduit walkway as the station shuddered, almost knocking her from her perch to the floor a few feet below. She hoped they could get the valves vented before a synchopathic wave ripped the station off the moon.
The next graviton slip was so strong the walkway seemed to fall out from under her. "Ohh!" she exclaimed, landing hard on the conduit walk.
One of the other technicians grabbed her arm, and helped her hang on. He looked at her. "What are you doing down here, Cadet?"
Her stomach leaped into her throat, threatening to strangle her. Her mouth opened wordlessly as the full import of her mistake hit her.
"Never mind," the technician whispered, glancing over his shoulder. "I always wanted to be in on the action, too, when I was a cadet. But you better get out of here before the lieutenant notices."
Jayme nodded, her eyes wide, as she backed away. Then she turned and ran down the conduit, barely grabbing hold of the ladder as another graviton slippage hit the station. For a moment she hung there, staring back at the others, attempting to fix the damage she had done to the conduits, while she had to climb back up where she belonged, unable to help.
"This is gross negligence, Cadet Miranda," Commander Aston of Jupiter Research Station said slowly, considering the report handed in by his first officer. "Do you have anything to say for yourself?"
"No, sir," Jayme said stiffly, staring straight ahead. She couldn't think of another Miranda who had received as many reprimands as she had acc.u.mulated in two-and-a-half years at the Academy. She wondered if she was destined to mess up with every commander she served under. If so, it was bound to be a very short career.
"I must say, Cadet Miranda," Aston said severely, "the reputation of your family members led me to expect a much different officer." The commander regarded her thoughtfully, a specimen in a jar.
Jayme winced. "I've been preoccupied lately, sir. It won't happen again."
The commander seated himself. "What's on your mind, cadet?" When Jayme hesitated, Aston urged, "Out with it! I want to know what's keeping you so busy that you neglect your simplest duties."
"I-I'm not sure I'll be happy, sir, as an engineer," Jayme said in a rush, letting out her breath in surprise that she had finally voiced her deepest fear.
"Cadet." The commander stood up and leaned forward, crooking his finger at Jayme. Startled, she leaned forward to hear his low order. "I don't care if you jump for joy all the way from your quarters to your workstation. But you don't let your personal feelings interfere with the safety of my station. Do you understand?"
Jayme snapped back to attention. "Yes, sir!"
The commander consulted his screen. "You'll continue your graviton adjustment duties, but you'll alternate with Cadet Sendonii in the aft conduit chamber. That way you can't make too much of a mess of my array." Jayme squirmed as the commander added, "We've suffered some structural damage, especially to the lower two decks, so you're to report to Lieutenant Barclay for extra maintenance and repair duty in the evenings."
"Yes, sir."
"There will also be a formal reprimand put on your permanent record." The commander's voice softened somewhat, his dark eyes looking on her kindly. "Good luck figuring out your career choice, Cadet. I know how difficult it can be sometimes. I thought I wanted to be a counselor for my first two years at the Academy, but as it turns out, I ended up right where I belong, holding this station together for some of our best researcher engineers."
Jayme looked at Aston with surprise, but before she could thank him, the commander seated himself. "You're dismissed, Cadet."
Jayme could handle hearing Starsa joke about her blunder-she was used to her former quadmate's completely irreverent att.i.tude about the most serious things. But Jayme hated knowing that everyone else was talking about her incompetence. When she and Starsa went to Zimmerman's lab to run the imaging checks, she had to hear it all over again.
"That was a fine trick you pulled, Cadet." Dr. Zimmerman narrowed his eyes at her. "Come this way. Look at that!" The random pieces of one of his experimental holographic imagers was gathered into clumpy piles. "Ruined! Three weeks of work, destroyed!"
"I'm sorry, sir," Jayme said through clenched teeth. "It wasn't done on purpose."
Zimmerman drew himself up. "I should hope not! Not when there have been so many inconvenienced by your negligence."
"I'm sorry, "Jayme repeated. Starsa glanced up, for once noticing the edge in her voice.
"You'll have to be more than sorry," Dr. Zimmerman continued blithely. "You have to look alive to be an engineer-"
"So maybe I should quit," Jayme interrupted. "Sir," she added belatedly.
"Quit? Starfleet?" Zimmerman rolled his eyes. "Now, let's not be dramatic."
"No, I mean quit being an engineer. Obviously I'm not cut out for it."
Starsa was staring at Jayme as if she had just swallowed the holo imaging scanner. "Quit? You can't quit!"
"Quite right," Zimmerman agreed, turning to Jayme. "Don't be absurd. You'll make a perfectly acceptable engineer. If you can keep your mind on what you're doing."
"Maybe I don't want to be an engineer," Jayme insisted.
"Why not?" Starsa spoke up, her voice cracking in utter surprise. "I thought you always wanted to be an engineer. Everyone in your family is an engineer!"
"Maybe I'm not." Jayme stubbornly set up the scanner and began her work.
"Well," Zimmerman said doubtfully, "you'll probably feel better in the morning."
"It's not a stomachache," Jayme said in exasperation. "It's not something I can just get over."
"Perhaps you should speak to your advisor about this," Zimmerman suggested, eyeing her in disbelief. "Or a counselor."
"Thank you, sir," Jayme said flatly, concentrating on the imager, trying to get the work done so she could get out of there. The silence was thick with resentment and unspoken criticism.
Once they were back in the corridor, Starsa asked, "Are you serious? You'd really quit engineering?"
"I just said that to get under his skin," Jayme tried to pa.s.s it off.
"Really?" Starsa didn't seem convinced. "You're more than halfway through the Academy. Why change now?"
"You're right," Jayme agreed, walking very fast, trying to get away from her, too. "I'd be crazy to switch majors now."
"You want to quit engineering?" Professor Chapman asked.
"Yes, sir," Jayme said, holding her chin level.
"To do what?" Chapman asked incredulously.
"I want to try to get into Starfleet Medical School, sir." Voicing her desire for the first time, especially to her academic advisor, was more difficult than she had imagined.
"Stop acting so formal," Chapman ordered irritably. "How can I have a conversation with you when you're at attention, staring over my head?"
"I'm sorry, sir," Jayme apologized. "It's been a difficult decision."
"I can imagine," Chapman agreed with understatement. "Isn't this a rather sudden change for you? Your secondary schooling was pre-engineering, wasn't it?"
"Yes."
"And you didn't mention you had doubts about your work at our beginning-of-the-third-year review."
"No."
"Are you going to speak in monosyllables this entire converation, Cadet?"
Jayme swallowed, realizing she had to snap out of it. Professor Chapman had always been sympathetic, and the two cla.s.ses she had taken with him proved he was a brilliant engineer.
"I'm not cut out for this, sir. I love diagnostics, but the routine maintenance work is driving me crazy. You ... you know about the graviton system malfunction on Jupiter Research Station?"
"I was notified," Chapman admitted. "I'm starting to get used to hearing about your reprimands."
Jayme blushed. "I'm not suited to engineering."
"But you are suited to medical studies? Which you've had no preparation for."
"Sir, I know I want to be a medical doctor. I'm an excellent diagnostician, and I've realized I would much rather work with people than machinery."
"Yes, but a doctor?" Chapman seemed doubtful.
"Yes; I've been working on the EMH here at Jupiter Station, and it's fascinating. I would much rather talk about speculums and seepage rates than rerouting circuitry."
"The EMH? Isn't that Zimmerman's program?" Chapman muttered more to himself than Jayme. "I should have known he was involved in this somehow."
"It's not Director Zimmerman," Jayme a.s.sured him. "I've been talking to the EMH holoprogram tied into the medical database. I've known what I really wanted to do for a while, but I couldn't face it until that graviton accident."
"You can't let one mistake upset all your hard work. Your grades aren't as high as they could be, granted, but you're not failing."
Jayme shook her head. "I'm barely a good technician, and that's taken every bit of effort I can muster. I just don't have my heart in it. You have to admit, sir, I'm no B'Elanna Torres."
"Torres left the Academy," Chapman said, his voice hardening with resentment.
Jayme tightened her lips, somehow frightened by the idea of leaving Starfleet. She had been shocked when she had found out Torres had left-the half-Klingon who was ten times the engineer she would ever be. "I hope I don't have to quit the Academy," she said fervently. "I don't know what other life I could have outside of Starfleet."
"Well, it hasn't come to that," Chapman said, somewhat mollified.
"It will if I have to keep studying engineering," Jayme said slowly. "I've been able to fake it up to a point, but now I have to make a real choice. Now I'm endangering people."
"You will have even more responsibility as a medical doctor," Chapman cautioned.
"That sort of pressure I can handle, I know it. You must agree that having a pa.s.sion for something makes for nine-tenths of the success."
"What about your field a.s.signment at the Jupiter Research Station?" Chapman asked.
"I'll finish here, of course," Jayme quickly said, realizing that was the only right answer.
"Very well then, you may submit an official change of majors, Cadet Miranda. I will approve your choice pending a thorough discussion with a premed advisor, so you know what you're up against." Chapman shuffled through electronic padds piled on his desk. "I'll try to track down an understanding advisor. Give me a few days, will you?"
"Thank you, sir!" Jayme exclaimed, grateful that she wasn't going to be denied her chance to try for medical school. She knew better than anyone if her grades weren't good enough, no amount of wanting it would get her in. It wasn't like she had a slew of relatives who were doctors who could vouch for her.
"... and clamp the artery at the base of the aorta." The EMH was describing a procedure, his hands twisted to show the angle. "That will allow you to staunch the flow of blood to see the angle of intrusion-"
"Why are you always talking to that holo-doc?" Starsa asked, coming up behind Jayme.
"At least he's not an engineer," Jayme told her. "There's nothing but engineers on this station."
"And you," Starsa said helpfully.
"What am I?" Jayme retorted.
Starsa shrugged, her eyes wide. "Whatever you are, you've got a call coming in."
Jayme turned to the EMH. "Thank you, Doctor. We'll continue tomorrow."
The EMH nodded to her, giving Starsa a reproachful look. "Don't bring your friend next time."
Starsa was looking with interest at the EMH. "Hey, are you the one who brainwashed Jayme into quitting engineering?"
"Cadet Miranda will make a fine medical student," the EMH calmly replied.
"Who are you to judge?" Starsa told him. "You're gonna have to learn to stay out of people's minds or you're going to get into lots of trouble."
"I am not in trouble," the EMH said smugly. "I am a emergency medical hologram. I perform my duties flawlessly."
"Thank you, Doctor," Jayme hastened to say. "End EMH program."