The Belton Estate Part 30

"You seem to speak of it as though there were some offence in it. Is there any reason why he should not be in London if he pleases?"

"None in the least. I would much rather that he should be there than here."

"Why so? Will his coming hurt you?"

"I don't like him. I don't like him at all;--and now you know the truth. You believe in him;--I don't. You think him to be a fine fellow and a gentleman, whereas I don't think him to be either."

"Mrs. Askerton!"

"This is strong language, I know."

"Very strong language."

"Yes, my dear; but the truth is, Clara, that you and I, living together here this sort of hermit's life, each seeing so much of the other and seeing nothing of anybody else, must either be real friends, telling each other what we think, or we must be nothing. We can't go on with the ordinary make-believes of society, saying little civil speeches and not going beyond them. Therefore I have made up my mind to tell you in plain language that I don't like your cousin, and don't believe in him."

"I don't know what you mean by believing in a man."

"I believe in you. Sometimes I have thought that you believe in me, and sometimes I have feared that you do not. I think that you are good, and honest, and true; and therefore I like to see your face and hear your voice,--though it is not often that you say very pleasant things to me."

"Do I say unpleasant things?"

"I am not going to quarrel with you,--not if I can help it. What business has Mr. Belton to go about London making inquiries as to me?

What have I done to him, that he should honour me so far?"

"Has he made inquiries?"

"Yes; he has. If you have been contented with me as I am,--if you are satisfied, why should he want to learn more? If you have any question to ask me I will answer it. But what right can he have to be asking questions among strangers?"

Clara had no question to ask, and yet she could not say that she was satisfied. She would have been better satisfied to have known more of Mrs. Askerton, but yet she had never condescended to make inquiries about her friend. But her curiosity was now greatly raised; and, indeed, Mrs. Askerton's manner was so strange, her vehemence so unusual, and her eagerness to rush into dangerous subjects so unlike her usual tranquillity in conversation, that Clara did not know how to answer her.

"I know nothing of any questioning," she said.

"I am sure you don't. Had I thought you did, much as I love you,--valuable as your society is to me down in this desert,--I would never speak to you again. But remember,--if you want to ask any questions, and will ask them of me,--of me,--I will answer them, and will not be angry."

"But I don't want to ask any questions."

"You may some day; and then you can remember what I say."

"And am I to understand that you are determined to quarrel with my cousin Will?"

"Quarrel with him! I don't suppose that I shall see him. After what I have said it is not probable that you will bring him here, and the servant will have orders to say that I am not at home if he should call. Luckily he and Colonel Askerton did not meet when he was here before."

"This is the most strange thing I ever heard in my life."

"You will understand it better, my dear, when he makes his communication to you."

"What communication?"

"You'll find that he'll have a communication to make. He has been so diligent and so sharp that he'll have a great deal to tell, I do not doubt. Only, remember, Clara, that if anything that he tells you makes any difference in your feelings towards me, I shall expect you to come to me and say so openly. If he makes his statement, let me make mine. I have a right to ask for that, after what I have promised."

"You may be sure that I will."

"I want nothing more. I have no distrust in you,--none in the least.

I tell you that I believe in you. If you will do that, and will keep Mr. William Belton out of my way during his visit to these parts, I shall be satisfied." For some time past Mrs. Askerton had been walking about the room, but, as she now finished speaking, she sat herself down as though the subject was fully discussed and completed. For a minute or two she made an effort to resume her usual tranquillity of manner, and in doing so attempted to smile, as though ridiculing her own energy. "I knew I should make a fool of myself when you came," she said; "and now I have done it."

"I don't think you have been a fool at all, but you may have been mistaken."

"Very well, my dear, we shall see. It's very odd what a dislike I took to that man the first time I saw him."

"And I am so fond of him!"

"Yes; he has cozened you as he has your father. I am only glad that he did not succeed in cozening you further than he did. But I ought to have known you better than to suppose you could give your heart of hearts to one who is--"

"Do not abuse him any more."

"Who is so very unlike the sort of people with whom you have lived. I may, at any rate, say that."

"I don't know that. I haven't lived much with any one yet,--except papa, and my aunt, and you."

"But you know a gentleman when you see him."

"Come, Mrs. Askerton, I will not stand this. I thought you had done with the subject, and now you begin again. I had come here on purpose to tell you something of real importance,--that is, to me; but I must go away without telling you, unless you will give over abusing my cousin."

"I will not say a word more about him,--not at present."

"I feel so sure that you are mistaken, you know."

"Very well;--and I feel sure that you are mistaken. We will leave it so, and go to this matter of importance." But Clara felt it to be very difficult to tell her tidings after such a conversation as that which had just occurred. When she had entered the room her mind had been tuned to the subject, and she could have found fitting words without much difficulty to herself; but now her thoughts had been scattered and her feelings hurt, and she did not know how to bring herself back to the subject of her engagement. She paused, therefore, and sat with a doubtful, hesitating look, meditating some mode of escape. "I am all ears," said Mrs. Askerton; and Clara thought that she discovered something of ridicule or of sarcasm in the tone of her friend's voice.

"I believe I'll put it off till another day," she said.

"Why so? You don't think that anything really important to you will not be important to me also?"

"I'm sure of that, but somehow--"

"You mean to say that I have ruffled you?"

"Well;--perhaps; a little."

"Then be unruffled again, like my own dear, honest Clara. I have been ruffled too, but I'll be as tranquil now as a drawing-room cat." Then Mrs. Askerton got up from her chair, and seated herself by Clara's side on the sofa. "Come; you can't go till you've told me; and if you hesitate, I shall think that you mean to quarrel with me."

"I'll come to you to-morrow."

"No, no; you shall tell me to-day. All to-morrow you'll be preparing for your cousin."

"What nonsense!"

"Or else you'll come prepared to vindicate him, and then we shan't get on any further. Tell me what it is to-day. You can't leave me in curiosity after what you have said."