The Anatomy of Melancholy Part 65

[5361] "Sic quo quis proprior suae puellae est, Hoc stultus proprior suae runinae est."

"The nearer he unto his mistress is, The nearer he unto his ruin is."

So that to say truth, as [5362]Castilio describes it, "The beginning, middle, end of love is nought else but sorrow, vexation, agony, torment, irksomeness, wearisomeness; so that to be squalid, ugly, miserable, solitary, discontent, dejected, to wish for death, to complain, rave, and to be peevish, are the certain signs and ordinary actions of a lovesick person." This continual pain and torture makes them forget themselves, if they be far gone with it, in doubt, despair of obtaining, or eagerly bent, to neglect all ordinary business.

[5363] ------"pendent opera interrupta, minaeque Murorum ingentes, aequataque machina coelo."

Lovesick Dido left her work undone, so did [5364]Phaedra,

------"Palladis telae vacant Et inter ipsus pensa labuntur ma.n.u.s."

Faustus, in [5365]Mantuan, took no pleasure in anything he did,

"Nulla quies mihi dulcis erat, nullus labor aegro Pectore, sensus iners, et mens torpore sepulta, Carminis occiderat studium."------

And 'tis the humour of them all, to be careless of their persons and their estates, as the shepherd in [5366]Theocritus, _et haec barba inculta est, squalidique capilli_, their beards flag, and they have no more care of pranking themselves or of any business, they care not, as they say, which end goes forward.

[5367] "Oblitusque greges, et rura domestica totus [5368] Uritur, et noctes in luctum expendit amaras,

"Forgetting flocks of sheep and country farms, The silly shepherd always mourns and burns."

Lovesick [5369]Chaerea, when he came from Pamphila's house, and had not so good welcome as he did expect, was all amort, Parmeno meets him, _quid tristis es_? Why art thou so sad man? _unde es_? whence comest, how doest?

but he sadly replies, _Ego hercle nescio neque unde eam, neque quorsum eam, ita prorsus oblitus sum mei_, I have so forgotten myself, I neither know where I am, nor whence I come, nor whether I will, what I do. P. [5370]"How so?" Ch. "I am in love." _Prudens sciens._ [5371]--_vivus vidensque pereo, nec quid agam scio._ [5372]"He that erst had his thoughts free" (as Philostratus Lemnius, in an epistle of his, describes this fiery pa.s.sion), "and spent his time like a hard student, in those delightsome philosophical precepts; he that with the sun and moon wandered all over the world, with stars themselves ranged about, and left no secret or small mystery in nature unsearched, since he was enamoured can do nothing now but think and meditate of love matters, day and night composeth himself how to please his mistress; all his study, endeavour, is to approve himself to his mistress, to win his mistress' favour, to compa.s.s his desire, to be counted her servant." When Peter Abelard, that great scholar of his age, _Cui soli patuit scibile quicquid erat_, [5373]("whose faculties were equal to any difficulty in learning,") was now in love with Heloise, he had no mind to visit or frequent schools and scholars any more, _Taediosum mihi valde fuit_ (as he [5374]confesseth) _ad scholas procedere, vel in iis morari_, all his mind was on his new mistress.

Now to this end and purpose, if there be any hope of obtaining his suit, to prosecute his cause, he will spend himself, goods, fortunes for her, and though he lose and alienate all his friends, be threatened, be cast off, and disinherited; for as the poet saith, _Amori quis legem det_?[5375]

though he be utterly undone by it, disgraced, go a begging, yet for her sweet sake, to enjoy her, he will willingly beg, hazard all he hath, goods, lands, shame, scandal, fame, and life itself.

"Non recedam neque quiescam, noctu et interdiu, profecto quam aut ipsam, aut mortem investigavero."

"I'll never rest or cease my suit Till she or death do make me mute."

Parthenis in Aristaenetus [5376]was fully resolved to do as much. "I may have better matches, I confess, but farewell shame, farewell honour, farewell honesty, farewell friends and fortunes, &c. O, Harpedona, keep my counsel, I will leave all for his sweet sake, I will have him, say no more, _contra gentes_, I am resolved, I will have him." Gobrias,[5377] the captain, when, he had espied Rhodanthe, the fair captive maid, fell upon his knees before Mystilus, the general, with tears, vows, and all the rhetoric he could, by the scars he had formerly received, the good service he had done, or whatsoever else was dear unto him, besought his governor he might have the captive virgin to be his wife, _virtutis suae spolium_, as a reward of his worth and service; and, moreover, he would forgive him the money which was owing, and all reckonings besides due unto him, "I ask no more, no part of booty, no portion, but Rhodanthe to be my wife." And when as he could not compa.s.s her by fair means, he fell to treachery, force and villainy, and set his life at stake at last to accomplish his desire. 'Tis a common humour this, a general pa.s.sion of all lovers to be so affected, and which Aemilia told Aratine, a courtier in Castilio's discourse, "surely Aratine, if thou werst not so indeed, thou didst not love; ingenuously confess, for if thou hadst been thoroughly enamoured, thou wouldst have desired nothing more than to please thy mistress. For that is the law of love, to will and nill the same."[5378]_Tantum velle et nolle, velit nolit quod amica_?[5379]

Undoubtedly this may be p.r.o.nounced of them all, they are very slaves, drudges for the time, madmen, fools, dizzards, _atrabilarii_[5380], beside themselves, and as blind as beetles. Their dotage [5381]is most eminent, _Amore simul et sapere ipsi Jovi non datur_, as Seneca holds, Jupiter himself cannot love and be wise both together; the very best of them, if once they be overtaken with this pa.s.sion, the most staid, discreet, grave, generous and wise, otherwise able to govern themselves, in this commit many absurdities, many indecorums, unbefitting their gravity and persons.

[5382] "Quisquis amat servit, sequitur captivus amantem, Fert domita cervice jugum"------

Samson, David, Solomon, Hercules, Socrates, &c. are justly taxed of indiscretion in this point; the middle sort are between hawk and buzzard; and although they do perceive and acknowledge their own dotage, weakness, fury, yet they cannot withstand it; as well may witness those expostulations and confessions of Dido in Virgil.

[5383] "Incipit effari mediaque in voce resist.i.t."

Phaedra in Seneca.

[5384] "Quod ratio poscit, vincit ac regnat furor, Potensque tota mente dominatur deus."

Myrrha in [5385]. Ovid

"Illa quidem sent.i.t, foedoque repugnat amori, Et sec.u.m quo mente feror, quid molior, inquit, Dii precor, et pietas," &c.

"She sees and knows her fault, and doth resist, Against her filthy l.u.s.t she doth contend.

And whither go I, what am I about?

And G.o.d forbid, yet doth it in the end."

Again,

------"Per vigil igne Carpitur indomito, furiosaque vota retrectat, Et modo desperat, modo vult tentare, pudetque Et cupit, et quid agat, non invenit," &c.

"With raging l.u.s.t she burns, and now recalls Her vow, and then despairs, and when 'tis past, Her former thoughts she'll prosecute in haste, And what to do she knows not at the last."

She will and will not, abhors: and yet as Medea did, doth it,

------"Trahit invitam nova via, aliudque cupido, Mens aliud suadet; video meliora, proboque, Deteriora sequor."------

"Reason pulls one way, burning l.u.s.t another, She sees and knows what's good, but she doth neither,"

"O fraus, amorque, et mentis emotae furor, quo me abstulistis?"[5386]

The major part of lovers are carried headlong like so many brute beasts, reason counsels one way, thy friends, fortunes, shame, disgrace, danger, and an ocean of cares that will certainly follow; yet this furious l.u.s.t precipitates, counterpoiseth, weighs down on the other; though it be their utter undoing, perpetual infamy, loss, yet they will do it, and become at last _insensati_, void of sense; degenerate into dogs, hogs, a.s.ses, brutes; as Jupiter into a bull, Apuleius an a.s.s, Lycaon a wolf, Tereus a lapwing, [5387]Calisto a bear, Elpenor and Grillus info swine by Circe. For what else may we think those ingenious poets to have shadowed in their witty fictions and poems but that a man once given over to his l.u.s.t (as [5388]Fulgentius interprets that of Apuleius, _Alciat of Tereus_) "is no better than a beast."

"Rex fueram, sic crista docet, sed sordida vita Immundam e tanto culmine fecit avem."[5389]

"I was a king, my crown my witness is, But by my filthiness am come to this."

Their blindness is all out as great, as manifest as their weakness and dotage, or rather an inseparable companion, an ordinary sign of it, [5390]

love is blind, as the saying is, Cupid's blind, and so are all his followers. _Quisquis amat ranam, ranam putat esse Dianam_. Every lover admires his mistress, though she be very deformed of herself, ill-favoured, wrinkled, pimpled, pale, red, yellow, tanned, tallow-faced, have a swollen juggler's platter face, or a thin, lean, chitty face, have clouds in her face, be crooked, dry, bald, goggle-eyed, blear-eyed, or with staring eyes, she looks like a squissed cat, hold her head still awry, heavy, dull, hollow-eyed, black or yellow about the eyes, or squint-eyed, sparrow-mouthed, Persian hook-nosed, have a sharp fox nose, a red nose, China flat, great nose, _nare simo patuloque_, a nose like a promontory, gubber-tushed, rotten teeth, black, uneven, brown teeth, beetle browed, a witch's beard, her breath stink all over the room, her nose drop winter and summer, with a Bavarian poke under her chin, a sharp chin, lave eared, with a long crane's neck, which stands awry too, _pendulis mammis_, "her dugs like two double jugs," or else no dugs, in that other extreme, b.l.o.o.d.y fallen fingers, she have filthy, long unpared nails, scabbed hands or wrists, a tanned skin, a rotten carca.s.s, crooked back, she stoops, is lame, splay-footed, "as slender in the middle as a cow in the waist," gouty legs, her ankles hang over her shoes, her feet stink, she breed lice, a mere changeling, a very monster, an oaf imperfect, her whole complexion savours, a harsh voice, incondite gesture, vile gait, a vast virago, or an ugly t.i.t, a slug, a fat fustilugs, a truss, a long lean rawbone, a skeleton, a sneaker (_si qua latent meliora puta_), and to thy judgment looks like a merd in a lantern, whom thou couldst not fancy for a world, but hatest, loathest, and wouldst have spit in her face, or blow thy nose in her bosom, _remedium amoris_ to another man, a dowdy, a s.l.u.t, a scold, a nasty, rank, rammy, filthy, beastly quean, dishonest peradventure, obscene, base, beggarly, rude, foolish, untaught, peevish, Irus' daughter, Thersites'

sister, Grobians' scholar, if he love her once, he admires her for all this, he takes no notice of any such errors, or imperfections of body or mind, [5391]_Ipsa haec--delectant, veluti Balbinum Polypus Agnae_,; he had rather have her than any woman in the world. If he were a king, she alone should be his queen, his empress. O that he had but the wealth and treasure of both the Indies to endow her with, a carrack of diamonds, a chain of pearl, a cascanet of jewels, (a pair of calfskin gloves of four-pence a pair were fitter), or some such toy, to send her for a token, she should have it with all his heart; he would spend myriads of crowns for her sake.

Venus herself, Panthea, Cleopatra, Tarquin's Tanaquil, Herod's Mariamne, or [5392]Mary of Burgundy, if she were alive, would not match her.

"([5393]Vincit vultus haec Tyndarios, Qui moverunt horrida bellla."

Let Paris himself be judge) renowned Helen comes short, that Rodopheian Phillis, Larissean Coronis, Babylonian Thisbe, Polixena, Laura, Lesbia, &c., your counterfeit ladies were never so fair as she is.

[5394] "Quicquid erit placidi, lepidi, grati, atque faceti, Vivida cunctorum retines Pandora deorum."

"Whate'er is pretty, pleasant, facete, well, Whate'er Pandora had, she doth excel."

[5395]_Dicebam Trivioe formam nihil esse Dianoe_. Diana was not to be compared to her, nor Juno, nor Minerva, nor any G.o.ddess. Thetis' feet were as bright as silver, the ankles of Hebe clearer than crystal, the arms of Aurora as ruddy as the rose, Juno's b.r.e.a.s.t.s as white as snow, Minerva wise, Venus fair; but what of this? Dainty come thou to me. She is all in all,

[5396] ------"Caelia ridens Est Venus, incedens Juno, Minerva loquens."

[5397] "Fairest of fair, that fairness doth excel."

Ephemerus in Aristaenetus, so far admireth his mistress' good parts, that he makes proclamation of them, and challengeth all comers in her behalf.

[5398]"Whoever saw the beauties of the east, or of the west, let them come from all quarters, all, and tell truth, if ever they saw such an excellent feature as this is." A good fellow in Petronius cries out, no tongue can [5399]tell his lady's fine feature, or express it, _quicquid dixeris minus erit_, &c.

"No tongue can her perfections tell, In whose each part, all tongues may dwell."

Most of your lovers are of his humour and opinion. She is _nulli secunda_, a rare creature, a phoenix, the sole commandress of his thoughts, queen of his desires, his only delight: as [5400]Triton now feelingly sings, that lovesick sea-G.o.d: