The Adventures of Hajji Baba of Ispahan Part 41

?Hajji,? said he, after an ominous pause, ?look at me! Do you take us for animals, without understanding, without common sense? or do you look upon yourself as the man of his day without compare, specially privileged to take the beards of humankind into your hand, and to do what you like with them??

?What is this that you say?? I replied. ?O my Aga! I am n.o.body and nothing; I am less than an ounce of dust.?

?Man!? said the second brother, in a warmer tone of voice, ?n.o.body and nothing, do you say? then what have you made of us? Are we nothing, that you should come all this distance from Bagdad to make us dance like apes at your bidding??

?Oh, Allah, great and good!? exclaimed I, ?what is all this? Why do you speak after this manner? What have I done? Speak, and speak truth!?

?Ah, Hajji, Hajji!? said my wife?s uncle, shaking his head and grey beard at the same time, ?you have been eating much abomination! Could a man who has seen the world like you, suppose that others will eat it with you, and say, thanks be to Allah! No, no--we may eat, but will not digest your insolence.

?But what have I done, O my uncle?? said I to him; ?by my soul, speak!?

?What have you done?? said my wife?s cousin. ?Is lying nothing? is stealing nothing? is marrying a wife under false pretences nothing? You must be a rare man without shame to call such acts nothing!?

?Perhaps,? said the eldest brother, ?you think it a great honour which the son of an Ispahan barber confers upon one of the richest families of Constantinople, when he marries their daughter!?

?And perhaps,? said the other, ?you may look upon a beggarly vender of pipe-sticks in the light of a merchant, and think him worthy of any alliance!?

?But Hajji, praise be to Allah! is a great merchant,? said the uncle ironically: ?his silks and velvets are now on their way to bring us lambskins from Bokhara; his shawls are travelling to us from Cashmere, and his ships are blackening the surface of the seas between China and Ba.s.sorah!?

?And his parentage,? continued his son in the same strain, ?a barber?s son did you say? forbid it, Allah! No, no; he dates from the Koreish. He is not even the descendant, but, by the blessing of G.o.d, of the ancestry of the Prophet; and who can come in compet.i.tion with a Mansouri Arab??

?What is all this?? again and again did I exclaim, as I saw the storm gathering about my ears. ?If you want to kill me, do so; but do not pull off my skin by inches.?

?I tell you what is it, man without faith,? said the stern man, who hitherto had remained immovable; ?you are a wretch who deserves not to live! and if you do not immediately give up all pretensions to your wife, and leave this house and everything that belongs to it, without a moment?s delay, do you see those men? (pointing to the two ruffians before mentioned); ?they will just make your soul take leave of your body as easy as they would knock the tobacco out of their pipes. I have spoken, and you are master to act as you please.?

Then the whole of the a.s.sembly, as if excited by this speech, unloosed their tongues at once, and, without reserve of words or action, told me a great number of disagreeable truths.

This storm, which I permitted to rage without opening my lips, gave me time for reflection, and I determined to try what a little resistance would do.

?And who are you,? said I to the stern man, ?who dares come into my house, and treat me as your dog? As for these,? pointing to my wife?s relations, ?the house is theirs, and they are welcome; but you, who are neither her father, her brother, nor her uncle, what have you to do here? I neither married your daughter, nor your sister, and therefore what can it be to you who I am??

All this while he seemed swelling with rage. He and his ruffians were curling up their mustachios to the corners of their eyes, and eyeing me, as the lion does the hind, before he pounces upon it.

?Who am I?? said he with a voice of anger. ?If you want to know, ask those who brought me here. I and my men act from authority, which if you dispute, it will be the worse for you.?

?But,? said I, softening my tone, for I now found that they were officers of the police, ?but if you insist upon separating me from my wife, to whom I have been lawfully married, give me time to consult the men of the law. Every son of Islam has the blessed Koran as his refuge, and ye would not be such infidels as to deprive me of that? Besides, I have not been told yet that she agrees to what you propose. She first sought me out; I did not seek her. She wooed me for my own sake, not for any worldly interest; and when I accepted her I knew her not, neither had I any tidings of either her wealth or her family. The whole has been the business of predestination, and if ye are Mussulmans, will ye dare to oppose that??

?As to the wishes of Shekerleb upon the subject,? said the eldest brother, ?make your mind easy. She desires a separation more even than we do.?

?Yes, yes, in the name of the Prophet, yes, let him go in peace. For the sake of Allah, let us be free,? and fifty other such exclamations, all at once struck my ear; and on looking to the door which led into the women?s apartments, from whence the sound came, I beheld my women veiled, headed by my wife, who had been conducted there on purpose to give evidence against me, and who all seemed possessed by so many evil spirits, shouting and wailing out their lamentations and entreaties for my dismissal, as if I were the wicked one in person to be exorcised from the house.

Finding that all was over with me, that it was in vain to contend against a power I could not withstand, stranger and unprotected as I was in a foreign land, I put the best face I could upon my forlorn situation, and getting up from my seat, I exclaimed, ?If it is so, be it so. I neither want Shekerleb nor her money, nor her brothers, nor her uncle, nor anything that belongs to them, since they do not want me; but this I will say, that they have treated me in a manner unworthy of the creed and name of Mussulmans. Had I been a dog among the unbelievers, I should have been treated better. From the bottom of my heart I believe that the same punishment which shall be inflicted, on the last day, upon those who reject our Holy Prophet, shall be inflicted upon my oppressors.? I then, with great emphasis, p.r.o.nounced the following sentence against them, as near as my memory would serve me, from the blessed Koran:--?They shall have garments of living fire, fitted tight upon them; boiling water shall be poured over them; their bowels and skins shall be dissolved, and, in this state, they be beaten with red hot maces of iron, and flogged with whips, whose lashes are made of lightnings, and the noise of which shall be claps of thunder.?

Upon this, roused and excited as I was with the speech I had made, I stood in the middle of the room, and divested myself of every part of my dress which had belonged to my wife, or which I might have purchased with her money. Throwing down every article from me, as if it had been abomination, and then calling for an old cloak which had originally belonged to me, I threw it over my shoulders and made my exit, denouncing a curse upon the staring a.s.sembly I left behind me.

CHAPTER LXXII

An incident in the street diverts his despair--He seeks consolation in the advice of old Osman.

When I had got into the street I walked hastily on without, for some time, heeding whither I was bending my steps. My breast was convulsed by a thousand contending pa.s.sions; and so nearly had I lost possession of my reason, that, when in sight of the sea, I began seriously to consider whether it would not be wisdom to throw myself headlong in.

But, crossing a large open s.p.a.ce, an occurrence happened which, however trifling it may appear, was of great consequence to me, inasmuch as it turned the current of my thoughts into a new channel, and saved me from destruction. I was witness to one of those dog fights so frequently seen in the streets of Constantinople. A dog had strayed into the territory of another community, had infringed their rights, and stolen a bone.

Immediately an immense uproar ensued; all were on foot, and in full cry, and the strange dog was chased across the border into his own territory.

Here, meeting some of his own friends, he called them about him, returned to the attack, and a general engagement ensued as I was pa.s.sing.

While I stood by, intent upon the scene, a thought struck me, and I exclaimed, ?Allah, oh Allah, how inscrutable are thy designs! and how little ought man, narrow-minded, short-sighted man, ever to repine at thy decrees! Thou throwest into my path a lesson, which teaches me the way that I should go, and that a.s.sistance is ever at hand to those who will seek it; and, though given by a dog, let me not despise it. No, am I to be surprised at anything, when I see animals, without reason, acting like men, with it? Let me not be cast down, but rather retreat to where I may still find a friend, and seek consolation in his advice and experience!?

Upon this, I turned almost mechanically to where I knew I should find my faithful friend and adviser, the old Osman, who, although a Turk and a Suni, had always behaved to me as if he had been my countryman, and one of my own religious persuasion. He received me in his usual quiet manner; and when I had related all my misfortunes, he puffed out a long volume of smoke from his never-failing chibouk, and exclaimed, with a deep sigh, ?_Allah kerim!_ (G.o.d is merciful!)?

?My friend,? said he, ?when you appeared here in all your magnificence before the Persians, from that moment I was apprehensive that some evil would befall you. You perhaps are yet not old enough to have learnt how odious are comparisons. Could you for a moment suppose, that men, in your own station in life, who are drudging on, day after day, intent upon the sale of a pipestick or a bag of Shiraz tobacco, that they could bear to be bearded by an appearance of greatness and prosperity, so much beyond anything which they could ever expect to attain? Had you appeared with a better coat or a richer cap than they, or had you been mounted on a horse, when they could only afford an a.s.s, then, perhaps, nothing more would have been said, but that you were more expert in making your fortune, and a better retailer of your wares. But to crush, to beat them down, with your magnificent dress, your amber-headed pipes, your train of servants, your richly caparisoned horse, and, above all, the airs of grandeur and protection which you took upon yourself, was more than they could allow, and they immediately rose in hostility, and determined to bring you down to their own level again, if possible. Evidently, it is they who have whispered into the ear of your wife?s brothers that you were not a Bagdad merchant, but only the son of an Ispahan barber, and a sorry vender of little wares. They, doubtless, soon undeceived them respecting the possibility of fulfilling the stipulations to which you have bound yourself in your wife?s marriage contract; and they, it is plain, have commented freely upon your pretensions to n.o.ble birth, and upon the flourishing account which you gave of your mercantile concerns, of your transactions in Bokhara, and of your ships sailing to China. Had you first visited me in a quiet way, as Hajji Baba, the Ispahani, and not as Hajji Baba, the Turkish Aga, I would have warned you against making an undue exhibition of yourself and your prosperity before your countrymen; but the mischief was done as soon as the deed was over, and now all that can be recommended is, that from the past you gain experience for the future.? After this speech he took to his pipe again, and puffed away with redoubled vigour.

?This may be very true,? said I. ?What is done, is done, and peace abide with it: but, after all, I am a Mussulman, and justice is due to me as well as to another. I never heard of a woman putting away her husband, although the contrary frequently happens; and it has not yet reached my understanding why I should be the only true believer who is called into the house, and thrust out of it again, in a manner that would even disgrace a dog, merely because it suits a capricious woman one morning to like, and the evening after to dislike, me. Cadies, mufties, sheikh-el-islams, abound here as well as in other Mohamedan cities, and why should I not have recourse to them? They are paid to administer justice, and wherefore should they sit, with their hands across, counting their beads, when such injustice as that, with which I have been visited, is going about the land seeking for redress??

?Are you mad, Hajji?, rejoined the old man, ?to think of redress from the widow and relations of one of the most powerful emirs of Islam, and that, too, when she is supported by her brothers, two of the richest merchants in Constantinople? Where have you lived all your lifetime, not to know, that he who hath most gold hath most justice? and that, if such a man as you were to appear before the tribunal of the mufti, with every word, line, leaf, and surai of the Koran in your favour, and one as rich and powerful as your wife?s brother were to appear on the other side against you, as long as he had gold in his favour, you might appeal to your sacred book until you and it were tired of walking round each other, for justice you would never obtain.?

?O, Ali! O, Mohammed!? exclaimed I, ?if the world is indeed as iniquitous as this, then Hajji Baba, truly, has made a bad bargain, and I wish he were again in possession of his pipesticks: but I cannot, and will not, lose all and everything in this easy manner,--I will go and proclaim my misfortunes from the housetop, rather.?

Upon which, in utter despair, I began to cry and moan, and pulled out some of my beard by the roots.

Osman Aga endeavoured to comfort me,--made me look back upon my past life, and brought to my recollection our mutual adventures while prisoners among the Turcomans.

?G.o.d is all-powerful and all-merciful,? said he. ?Our destinies are written in the book, and therefore what is there left, but to submit??

?But I am a Persian,? exclaimed I (a new thought having crossed my mind), ?as well as a Mussulman; why, therefore, should I submit to injustice from a Turk? We are, after all, a nation, and have had our Jinghizs, our Timours, and our Nadirs, who made our name respected throughout the world, and who burnt the fathers of the Turks wherever they could find them. I will seek our amba.s.sador, and, if he be a man, he will insist upon justice being done me. Yes, yes! the amba.s.sador shall get back my wife; (oh, lucky thought!) and then we shall see who will take her from me again.?

So elated was I by this idea, that I did not stop to hear what Osman might have to say on the subject, but immediately sallied forth, full of fresh spirits and vigour, to seek out the representative of our King of Kings, who, at the best of all fortunate hours, had very recently arrived on a mission to the Sublime Porte.

[Ill.u.s.tration: Hajji relates his story to Mirza Firouz. 39.jpg]

CHAPTER LXXIII

In endeavouring to gain satisfaction from his enemies he acquires a friend--Some account of Mirza Firouz.

Upon inquiry I found that the amba.s.sador had been provided with a residence at Scutari, and thither I immediately bent my course, happy to have the time which I should pa.s.s in the boat at my disposal, in order to arrange my ideas for the purpose of making out a clear and strong case of complaint.

Having landed, I inquired the way to his house, the avenues of which were thronged by his numerous servants, who reminded me of my country (so different from that in which we were) by their loquaciousness and quick gesticulation.

They soon found by my discourse, that I was one of them, although disguised by a Turkish dress, and without any difficulty I was promised immediately to be ushered into the presence of their master. But previously to this, I was anxious to acquire some little insight into his character, in order that I might shape my discourse accordingly; and therefore entered into conversation with one of his valets, who did not scruple to talk fully and unreservedly upon every topic upon which I required information.

The result of my inquiries was as follows:--The amba.s.sador, by name Mirza Firouz, was by birth a Shirazi, of respectable though not of high parentage, excepting in the instance of his mother, who was sister to a former grand vizier of great power, who, in fact, had been the means of placing the Shah upon his throne. The Mirza married his cousin, a daughter of the said vizier; and this led to his being employed in the government, though he had previously undergone many vicissitudes, which had caused him to travel into various countries. This circ.u.mstance, however, was one of the reasons of his being selected by the Shah to transact his business at foreign courts. ?He is a man of a quick and penetrating mind,? said my informant: ?irascible, but easy to soothe, of a tender and forgiving nature, although in his first anger led to commit acts of violence. He is gifted with the most overwhelming powers of speech, which always are sure to get him out of the sc.r.a.pes into which his indiscreet use of them very frequently leads him. To his servants and followers he is kind and the contrary, by turns. Sometimes he permits them to do and say everything which they choose, at others, he keeps them at a most chilling distance. But, on the whole, he is easy of access, of agreeable commerce, of most fascinating manners, and of a joyous and sociable nature.?