Tensei Shoujo no Rirekisho Vol 2 Chapter 6

The next morning, after waking up and opening up the window, a comforting breeze blew in.
 A breeze that blew away all encounters with yesterday’s dangerous stalker.
 Great, a good weather. Let’s settle it today. The duel!

 I kept all sorts of secret weapons inside my uniform skirt and crammed my leather shoulder bag full with other tools too.

 While it’s morning, let’s settle the duel today! I shouted with a lively spirit. The fifth period ended, and we met up at a rear garden found in the inner parts of the campus.

 There were a total of three of us, the duelists Alan and I, and the judge, Cain-sama. From here on, a divine duel shall begin.

 “And so, this time too, the person to have his b.u.t.t fall to the ground or fall to his knees would lose, is that agreeable? Also, is it accurate for me to say that any tools and equipment can be used, yes?”
 I said to reaffirm the settings for the duel and explain the rules too.
 Alan nodded in a.s.sent.

 “If Alan has any required items, please get them ready as well.”

 Alan looked on at my bag that was blatantly packed full with things, and made a slight frown while nodding. From the pocket of his robe, he took out a fist-sized crystal.

 “Kimigatame harunononiidete wakanatsumu wagakoromoteni yukihafurutsutsu”

 As he sung his chants, the crystal that he was holding onto transformed into a shield.
 Hoho, a shield huh? He must have had put some thought into it. Really, he must been really considerate if he were to not bring out any sword-like weapons or the like here. Well, I’m not going easy on him though, and did another check on the contents inside my bag.

 For now, I shall change the position of some of the tools.
 Alright, now it is perfect.

 “And now, it looks like my preparations are also completed, can we begin?”

 I said, after securing an upwind position in the garden.
 Alan seemed to conscious of his reason for defeat when he was five. He stole looks at me here and there and took up position relatively far from me. A gap of roughly 10 metres opened between us.

 After confirming that we are both fully prepared, Cain-sama said, “Start!” while signaling with the wave of his hand.

 As soon as the signal was given, I grabbed the pepper bombs from my bag and flung them towards Alan.
 The secret weapon I had wanted to use during the battle against Ryuki-san. A cylinder made from baked soil and packed with fine pepper powder.
 Bearing in mind that a distance of 10 metres was child’s play in the face of my throwing skills, I aimed and threw them at Alan without rest. Just in case I did not manage to hit his head, I continued to throw them with all I had.

 Nevertheless, Alan seemed to have foresaw that I would throw something at him and used the shield he had prepared beforehand to block whatever I threw at him. The pepper bombs merely struck his shield and did not hit Alan directly. Shattered pieces of clay scattered everywhere in front of him.

 Next, a cloud of sand-like powder danced in the air. Alan grinned, appearing to have lowered his guard as he thought he had defended against everything. Just as he was about to chant again, I instantly thought, ah, it is over and relaxed my hand that was in my bag.

 Alan who had an elated expression a second ago shut his eyes and yelled, “My eyes, my eyes—! Gu, kuh, kuh” while cowering over.

 Waiting after the pepper powder cloud dispersed, I went to where Alan was and pushed him down while he was squatting. A success in getting him to fall on his b.u.t.t.

 Alan’s face reddened and looked to be in pain so I gave him water and eye medication to gargle in his throat and wash his eye.
 Behind me was Cain-sama who was worried for Alan who was in distress suddenly.

 “A-Alan, what in the world……?”

 “The pepper powder that I had thrown when inhaled deeply, would cause throat pain. Also, it had gotten into his eyes I believe. It was because this place is in a downwind position.”

 I had considered the possibility where Alan dodges the pepper bombs and moves away but as soon as they struck his shield and fell, I did not have to pull any other tricks since my very first move had him checkmated. Having this match decided so quickly made all my preparations unnecessary.
 There were several other mini-traps laid, such as a pit where being stepped upon would cause a snake to jump out or a caltrop hidden among the weeds, not to mention the various other things in my bag that I have kept up my sleeve.

 Still, ending it this early was a fairly good outcome.

 After washing up his eye with the eye medication that I had concocted for treating the effects of the pepper bomb, Alan could somewhat open his eye. It was painful to watch his tears fall from his reddened eyes.

 Sorry, Alan. That was childish. Pepper bombs are dangerous huh. Please be good and copy what I did.
 I patted Alan on his back and made him drink medicine to help with the inflammation.

 “Alan-sama, are you alright? Can you speak?”
 I spoke as such but was met with vacant eyes from Alan as he looked downwards.

 “……Again, I lost right?”
 He spoke in a hoa.r.s.e voice but hearing him say something was rea.s.suring.

 “Trying to beat your boss hm? You are still 10 years early.”

 “Is that so……Ryou is really awesome,” said Alan as he hanged his head in despondency.

 Ah, Alan is feeling more dejected that I had expected! Wasn’t this not a better outcome than allowing an unfettered boy’s pride be on display like how a cricket chirps!?
 Yet, I had to prevent his stalking activities, or more like it, I could no longer ignore his actions!

 “I am glad that Alan-sama has always been concerned with me, but please, have a little more faith in me. I am, after all, Alan-sama’s boss. You don’t have to stal—, ahem, protect me every day!”

 “……but I am uneasy about it. Still, I……know I cannot always keep watch beside Ryou.”

 “You don’t have to be uneasy about it either. Especially so since this is the capital and the security here is superb. It’s not like I am going to be kidnapped or the like. Also, I can look after myself.”

 I replied and glared intensely at Alan who had been listlessly hanging his head down.
 “I got it! That, if it is Ryou, no matter what happens, you would be fine, that you would be able to solve your problems alone. I got it in my head already! Just like how you managed to live on well after being kidnapped by the bandits, even being adopted by an Earl too!” 

 At this point, Alan held his tongue back. Somehow, he seemed like it was difficult for him to continue and he started mumbling. Later, he again opened his mouth while facing downwards. He lost the vigour he had a moment ago, and was dispirited yet again.

 “When I heard that you had been kidnapped by the bandits, I thought I was the only one who could save you. I was sure Ryou was waiting for my rescue and practiced tirelessly for that, and that was when we got news that Ryou was safe. Still, I never once believed that Ryou was okay until I saw Ryou in person. I was convinced that you would be in despair, all worn out, waiting for my rescue……In the end, the actual Ryou became prettier, and was not actually waiting for my help at all. I did not know what to do after that.”

 Once again, he held back his tongue abruptly, stopping to look at me. Earlier, his eyes became moist in order to expel the pepper but it has gotten even wetter now.

 Ah, it must be my fault. I made someone worried for me because all I focused on was how to stop my suffering and was selfishly thinking only about myself.
 I wanted to apologise and was about to open my mouth but Alan stopped my lips with his hand.

 “Wrong. I am the worst. Ryou being in good health should have been of the greatest priority and yet, I became spiteful when I saw Ryou in the pink of health. That was when I became aware. ……You can be angry at me, Ryou. I was always, hoping and expecting for a depressed and worn-out Ryou. And, that was the Ryou which I wanted to save in a cool way……I’m the worst huh? In the end, all I think about is myself.”

 He said as he brought the hand that was on my lips down. Finally, large beads of tears fell from his eyes.

 “T-That is not true! Weren’t you angry at me when we reunited?! Wasn’t that because you were genuinely concerned for me! In fact, I should be the worst since I made you worried! Anyways, having some of these corrupt thoughts should be okay shouldn’t it?!”

 I wanted to lift the spirits of Alan whose spirits seem to have fallen to the depths of h.e.l.l and called out to him but Alan did not meet my eyes.

 “Now that I think about it, I had been the same when I watched over Ryou in school. Maybe I had wanted to prove that my hopeless self was non-existent by showing more concern to Ryou. Nope, I am sure that is the case. All of this, was for my own sake.”

 “Stop thinking so deeply into it! Hearing everything from you, I still do not think at all that Alan is the worst! In the first place, what is that you are saying?!
 That you reflected and understood on your own that, in the end, you were overly self-centric; isn’t that great! Also, what’s wrong with being narcissistic?! Well, I cannot really say I can commend you on your stalking activities but, isn’t it natural for everyone to hold such guilty feelings……”

 As my words quickly lost their strength, Alan revealed a vague smile. Still, that wasn’t a smile of a person who forgave himself.
 Please, I beg of you, please forgive yourself. If you don’t, I, I would……!

 And next, I had a sudden realisation.
 Throughout, I have not mentioned a word for Alan.
 I have come this far, with my cuteness, I did not convey anything at all to him. I veiled my vulgar emotions of embarra.s.sment and shame, and all I did was demonstrate my strength and flashiness.
 Who was I trying to pretend to be?

 “Having corrupt thoughts should be okay,” “what is that you are saying?!” “isn’t it natural for everyone to hold such guilty feelings.”

 The things that I said to Alan were all the words which I had wanted to direct to myself.

 “Moreover!”

 I raised my voice in an attempt to win over my powerlessness.
 Alan was really incredible. Gazing at me even those eyes were the ones which wanted to look away, and then being able to express everything he wanted to say.
 Whereas for me, all I did was ready myself and blabber about all those nonsense.

 “I was the one at wrong. I was the one that was being self-centred. Alan-sama, and the feelings of the rest, I did not contemplate them at all. I had placed my emotions at the forefront……that I would hurt someone, I never considered them at all……! In addition, I buried my egoistic self, and acted all innocently, imagining naively that we can get along well like that……! I was the one who cared about no one but myself! If Alan-sama is saying that he is the worst, I should be the one that is the worst!”

 I confessed all in one breath, and tried to maintain eye contact with Alan but my vision grew blurry and my eyes could not focus.

 All of a sudden, someone from behind ran straight and collided with my back.

 Timidly, I moved over and noticed that that was Cain-sama.
 Ah, I had carelessly forgotten about his existence.

 Cain-sama face turned red, tears bursting forth from his eyes while he embraced both Alan and I.
 Oh right, these two are brothers. The way their faces are tinged with red were very similar. My mind drifted to the trivialities.

 “Alan, Ryou! I……no, when I was not around, both of you have grown so honestly! Thank you, thank you!”

 Out of nowhere, Cain-sama broke into tears as he expressed his magnificent grat.i.tude. He proceeded to face both of us and hug us.

 “Alan and Ryou, it is alright! Just as I have previously said, the thing known as human progress into adulthood through mutually hurting one another. Each and every time we hurt ourselves and hurt others, if we stood still and stopped advancing, we would not be able to grow at all. The two of you are good kids. I can guarantee that! Now, wipe off your tears on my chest, and reconcile with one another!”

 Cain-sama voiced out as tears streamed down from his cheeks.
 B-Before that, Cain-sama offered us himself for us to dry our tears. With our tears and, additionally, our mucus all over him, won’t that lay waste to the ikemen!?

 Was Cain-sama always like that? I was probably too tensed earlier but being confused by my first time seeing Cain-sama being emotional, I had become more relaxed and could not help but find the sweet Cain-sama, face filled with tears and mucus, amusing.

 I feel bad for Cain-sama but, I seemed to have accidently let out a, “Bufuu,” giggle. However, breaking into laughter here would definitely be seen as being unable to read the mood so I stifled the laugh as much as I could.

 At the same time, I tried to take a glimpse at Alan, who was being embraced by Cain-sama. Alan was looking up at Cain-sama with a flabbergasted look.
 Our eyes met in the midst of it.

 Something is telling me inside my chest, that Alan is equally as refreshed and clear-headed like how I am right now.

 By verbalising my confession, I might have been trying to seek out forgiveness. Releasing the cap over my sinful self and inferior self, I was able to apologise and cleanse myself by doing so. At the very end, even that might have been an act of selfishness to reinvigorate myself. Still, I am glad I was able to say it.

 “Ryou, even you had regrets and cried as I did……it looks like I am not the only kid here.”

 Though Cain-sama was bawling his eyes out, I was still able to clearly hear Alan’s voice due to the small distance between us.

 That was obvious. Even I am a human. Because I remember my previous life, I imagined that I was somewhat of an adult already but perhaps, I died in my previous life not knowing anything at all. I had never felt this feeling before in my previous life.

 Alan and I both narrowed our eyes and laughed. By narrowing our eyes, more tears fell from our eyes but right next to us was the chest that had been loaned to us for wiping. No worries there.

 And that was how we were able to reconcile with one another.