Tangled Series: Tamed Part 10

I turn, so we're both directly under the spray, and eventually I loosen my embrace and set her down. Wearing ludicrously satisfied smiles, we wash each other slowly then step out into the steamy bathroom.

As I towel off, I glance at my watch. "s.h.i.t, I'm gonna be late."

Dee rubs her hair with the cotton cloth. "Late for what?"

I smirk. "I've got a date."

For all of Delores's insistence that she doesn't want to be serious, it's obvious my statement bugs the h.e.l.l out of her. Her elegant shoulders stiffen, her chin rises, her eyes darken and narrow. She tries her best to keep her voice nonchalant.

Tries-and fails.

"Oh, a date? That's nice. Good for you."

I grasp her hips and pull her up against me so she's got nowhere to look but at my grinning face. "You want to join us?"

She tries to pull away. "It's a little soon for a threesome, don't you think?"

My ears perk right up. "You've done a threesome?"

On second thought, I don't want to know.

"Never mind. Don't answer that. Although I like where your thoughts are headed. I'm not asking for a threesome. I'm asking you to come to the zoo . . ."

"Sounds kinky."

I squeeze her hips. ". . . with Mackenzie and me."

Dee processes my words. Then she smiles-a relieved, grateful smile. She thinks a moment more. "Won't Miss The-Dry-Cleaners-Will-Never-Get-That-Out have a problem with me tagging along?"

Many families are way too involved in each other's business. You know the kind I mean. Sisters who refuse to speak to each other because one married a guy the other didn't like. Brothers who come to blows because of a b.i.t.c.hy girlfriend, and friends who fall out of touch because someone refused to listen to advice that was never asked for in the first frigging place.

Even if Alexandra full-out hated Dee's guts, out of respect for me, she'd never show it. For months, Drew tried to tell me Rosaline wasn't the girl I thought she was, and even though I didn't believe him, even though he turned out to be right, he didn't rub my face in it.

The best kinds of families try to stop a train wreck-but if they can't, they still show up to give first aid to the walking wounded.

"You'll be with me. She'll be fine with it."

Alexandra and Steven's east side condo is a gorgeous place-I think it was featured in Architectural Digest or something. Despite the grandeur of it, Lexi still manages to make it feel like a home, not a museum. She opens the door for Dee and me, and we walk into the shiny, marble-floored entryway.

On her best behavior, Dee says, "h.e.l.lo, Alexandra. It's so nice to see you again."

"Delores-what a surprise. You'll be joining Matthew and Mackenzie at the zoo today?"

"I will."

Lexi smiles, but there's a teasing shine in her eyes. "That's nice. Only, I do try to discourage Mackenzie from throwing her food, so please remember to set a positive example."

I put my arm around Dee. "We'll try to control ourselves . . . but I make no promises."

At that moment, Mackenzie comes riding into the foyer. She drives her red, bell-ringing tricycle around the circular mahogany table in the center of the room, shaking the ornate arrangement of orchids and lilies in their vase. Reminds me of Danny Torrance from The Shining but without the hair-raising eeriness.

Mackenzie parks the trike and climbs her denim-overall-wearing self off. "Hi, Uncle Matthew!"

I get a hug.

"Hey, princess." I tilt my head in Delores's direction. "This is my friend Dee. She's going to come to the zoo with us today, all right?"

Mackenzie's never been a shy kid-she's confident and candid, no matter where she is or who she's with. Traits that run strong in her family.

"Hi, Miss Dee." The "Miss" is all Alexandra. She's drilled t.i.tles of respect into Mackenzie's head since she learned to talk.

Delores waves. Then Mackenzie zeroes in on the black fur vest she's wearing. She reaches out and pets it-like a rabbit. Then she asks, "Is that your Halloween costume?"

Dee's wearing tight white pants, a white top, and black sneakers that someone Bejeweled within an inch of their lives. With the vest, I can see why Mackenzie might think it's a costume-a Dalmatian, or a zebra.

"Mackenzie, that's rude," Lexi admonishes.

But Dee waves her hand. "No, it's fine." She crouches down to eye level with Mackenzie. "I like to dress like every day is Halloween."

Mackenzie's face brightens. "That's cool. Can I do that, Momma?"

Alexandra shakes her head. "No. You only get to be Frankenberry once a year."

With that, I get handed a neutral-colored man-purse with all the essentials that have to be in reach whenever any child Mackenzie's age leaves the house. And we head to the zoo.

When I was a kid, I thought zoos were pretty f.u.c.ked up. You take a bear, or a lion-the king of the jungle-and lock him in a 300 by 300 foot cage, add some greenery, and expect him to be happy? Wild animals are meant to be . . . wild. As I got older, I realized that a lot of the animals were rescued because they were sick or injured and wouldn't survive on the outside anyway. Although there's something to be said for nature taking its course, now I look at zoos as a wildlife retirement home where lions and tigers and bears get to live out the last of their days being cared for and catered to.

It may not be as exciting as living in the wild . . . but it sure beats being dead.

Dee, Mackenzie, and I spend the afternoon visiting all the exhibits in the Central Park Zoo-the lions, the reptile house. Unlike every other woman I know, Dee actually likes snakes. When she was a kid, she wanted a boa constrictor for her birthday, but her mother said no. Her cousin bought her a rubber one in consolation.

We eat lunch-pizza-and I don't even look at the hot dog cart. My days of chili dogs are over.

Dee buys Mackenzie a polar bear balloon and they have a long discussion about how many balloons she would need to be able to fly, like in the movie Up. Dee-because she knows about gases like helium-was actually able to figure out how many on her calculator. Mackenzie was totally impressed.

I just hope she doesn't get any ideas.

At the moment, we're eating popcorn and watching the penguins. And Mackenzie asks no one in particular, "Did you know the girl penguins got the boy penguins by the b.a.l.l.s?"

Dee chokes on a kernel.

Mackenzie doesn't notice. "Uncle Drew say the girl gets ta pick any boy penguin she wants-they has ta dance for them. Then, the boy penguin has ta carry the egg on his feet for a long time."

"Those girl penguins are some pretty smart cookies," Delores comments. And Mackenzie nods vigorously.

Next we move on to the monkeys. I'm not sure of their breed, but they're small, white little puff b.a.l.l.s that can only seem to sit still if they're trying to mount each other. Delores snorts and Mackenzie says, "They wrestle a lot."

I chuckle. And talk low in Dee's ear. "These h.o.r.n.y little guys are giving me ideas. We should go before I embarra.s.s myself."

Mackenzie-because she obviously has dog hearing-asks, "Uncle Matthew, whas 'h.o.r.n.y' mean?"

I'm quick with the save. "Excited."

She nods . . . and files it away in her adorable, unpredictable mind.

The three of us climb out of the cab back at Alexandra and Steven's. I hold Mackenzie on my shoulder-she's half asleep. Dee carries Mackenzie's balloon and her bag and about a dozen small gift shop items I couldn't not buy her. Alexandra lets us in, and Mackenzie perks up, trying to rub the weariness from her eyes. I set her on her feet, and she hugs us both, thanking us without being told.

Alexandra tells her, "There's a package on your bed-it came while you were out. I think it's the Elizabeth American Girl doll Grandma bought for your birthday, the one that was back-ordered."

Mackenzie's mouth forms a precious O, and she practically vibrates with excitement. "I been waiting for dat! I'm sooo h.o.r.n.y!"

Then she scampers out of the foyer to her room.

Alexandra turns stormy eyes on Dee and me. "Care to explain that?"

I rub the back of my neck . . . and then completely throw Steven under the bus. "You should really talk to your husband. He needs to watch his language around Mackenzie."

I'll make it up to him, I swear.

Dee joins in. "Yeah. Kids are like sponges. They just suck up everything around them."

From the look on Lexi's face, she's not buying it.

"We should go," Delores tells me.

"Yes, we should." I yawn. "The amphibians really wore me out. Bye, Lexi."

"Bye, Alexandra," Dee says.

Then we run.

Chapter 11.

That night, I blow off clubbing with the guys. Dee and I order Chinese takeout and spend the evening fantastically f.u.c.king in every room of my apartment.

I'll never look at my pool table the same way again.

We pa.s.s out in my bed, and I sleep the sleep of the exhausted d.a.m.ned . . . until the rustling of clothing and footsteps wakes me up in the middle of the night. I crack my eyes open to find Dee not next to me in the bed but bustling around the room, searching for her clothes and pulling them on hurriedly when she finds them.

"Dee? Are you all right?"

Her voice is wide awake and tense. "Yeah, I'm fine. Go back to sleep, Matthew."

Bleary-eyed, I glance at the clock: 3 a.m. "What are you doin'?"

"I'm going home."

I force myself to sit up, shaking the fog from my head. "Why?"

"Because that's where I live, remember?"

I don't know what bug crawled up her a.s.s while I was sleeping, but I'm really too tired to argue with her. I throw the blankets off. "Okay. Jus' give me a minute and I'll drive you."

Her eyes scan the floor, spotting her purse in the corner. "Don't bother. I'll take a cab."

Sensing my time is short, I pull on a pair of sweatpants and grab a T-shirt that landed on the nightstand after it was ripped off of me earlier. "Then I'll take the cab ride with you."

Delores stops and pins me with a sharp frown. "It may come as a shock, but I am capable of getting myself home, thank you very much."

"It's three o'clock in the G.o.dd.a.m.n morning, Delores."

She shrugs. "It's not like you live in a bad neighborhood."

"It's Manhattan-any neighborhood could be a bad neighborhood."

She doesn't respond. And she doesn't wait for me. I clutch my sneakers in my hand and barely remember to take my keys as I jog to keep up with her. Wide awake now, I slip into my shoes on the elevator.

"So, are you p.i.s.sed off at me about something specific, or is this a more general 'all men suck' kind of thing?"

She folds her arms. "I'm not p.i.s.sed off."

Translation? You're an a.s.shole, but you have to figure out why on your own, 'cause I'm not telling.

We walk out of the lobby. I wave the doorman off and hail a cab myself. The ride to Dee's place is strained and silent. I sneak sideways glances at her-because the quickest way to get your throat ripped out is staring a skittish dog in the eye.

She sits stiffly-not exactly angry looking, but anxious-like a cornered animal waiting for the chance to bolt. When we pull up to her building, Dee is out of the cab before the driver comes to a complete stop. I ask him to wait for me, then I hop out after her.

As she slides her key into the locked outer door, I put my hand over hers. "Could you, please, give me a hint about what's going on in your head right now? 'Cause I'm . . . kinda lost here, Dee."

She stares hard at our hands, then she faces me with a sigh. "This is just . . . you're moving way too fast for me."

I lean my shoulder against her building. "If you wanted me to go slow, all you had to do was say so. Hard, easy, fast, slow-I always aim to please."

"Don't be cute, Matthew."

Can't help it.

She wiggles her hands, fanning herself-like she's on the edge of a panic attack. "I woke up in your bed and . . . it's just too much. I feel like I'm suffocating. I need . . . s.p.a.ce."

s.p.a.ce.