Studies in the Psychology of Sex Volume Iv Part 17

Thus, the problem of human s.e.xual selection is in the highest degree complicated. When we gather together such scanty data of precise nature as are at present available, we realize that, while generally according with the results which the evidence not of a quant.i.tative nature would lead us to accept, their precise significance is not at present altogether clear. It would appear on the whole that in choosing a mate we tend to seek parity of racial and individual characters together with disparity of secondary s.e.xual characters. But we need a much larger number of groups of evidence of varying character and obtained under varying conditions. Such evidence will doubtless acc.u.mulate now that its nature is becoming defined and the need for it recognized. In the meanwhile we are, at all events, in a position to a.s.sert, even with the evidence before us, that now that the real meaning of s.e.xual selection is becoming clear its efficacy in human evolution can no longer be questioned.

APPENDICES

APPENDIX A.

THE ORIGINS OF THE KISS.

Manifestations resembling the kiss, whether with the object of expressing affection or s.e.xual emotion, are found among various animals much lower than man. The caressing of the antennae practiced by snails and various insects during s.e.xual intercourse is of the nature of a kiss. Birds use their bills for a kind of caress. Thus, referring to guillemots and their practice of nibbling each other's feet, and the interest the mate always takes in this proceeding, which probably relieves irritation caused by insects, Edmund Selous remarks: "When they nibble and preen each other they may, I think, be rightly said to cosset and caress, the expression and pose of the bird receiving the benefit being often beatific."[196] Among mammals, such as the dog, we have what closely resembles a kiss, and the dog who smells, licks, and gently bites his master or a b.i.t.c.h, combines most of the sensory activities involved in the various forms of the human kiss.

As practiced by man, the kiss involves mainly either the sense of touch or that of smell. Occasionally it involves to some extent both sensory elements.[197]

The tactile kiss is certainly very ancient and primitive. It is common among mammals generally. The human infant exhibits, in a very marked degree, the impulse to carry everything to the mouth and to lick or attempt to taste it, possibly, as Compayre suggests,[198] from a memory of the action of the lips protruded to seize the maternal nipple. The affectionate child, as Mantegazza remarks,[199] not only applies inanimate objects to its lips or tongue, but of its own impulse licks the people it likes. Stanley Hall, in the light of a large amount of information he obtained on this point, found that "some children insist on licking the cheeks, necks, and hands of those they wish to caress," or like having animals lick them.[200] This impulse in children may be a.s.sociated with the maternal impulse in animals to lick the young. "The method of licking the young practiced by the mother," remarks S. S. Buckman, "would cause licking to be a.s.sociated with happy feelings. And, further, there is the allaying of parasitical irritation which is afforded by the rubbing and hence results in pleasure. It may even be suggested that the desire of the mother to lick her young was prompted in the first place by a desire to bestow on her offspring a pleasure she felt herself." The licking impulse in the child may thus, it is possible, be regarded as the evanescent manifestation of a more fundamental animal impulse,[201] a manifestation which is liable to appear in adult life under the stress of strong s.e.xual emotion. Such an a.s.sociation is of interest if, as there is some reason to believe, the kiss of s.e.xual love originated as a development of the more primitive kiss bestowed by the mother on her child, for it is sometimes found that the maternal kiss is practiced where the s.e.xual kiss is unknown.

The impulse to bite is also a part of the tactile element which lies at the origin of kissing. As Stanley Hall notes, children are fond of biting, though by no means always as a method of affection. There is, however, in biting a distinctly s.e.xual origin to invoke, for among many animals the teeth (and among birds the bill) are used by the male to grasp the female more firmly during intercourse. This point has been discussed in the previous volume of these Studies in reference to "Love and Pain," and it is unnecessary to enter into further details here. The heroine of Kleist's Penthesilea remarks: "Kissing (Kusse) rhymes with biting (Bisse), and one who loves with the whole heart may easily confound the two."

The kiss, as known in Europe, has developed on a sensory basis that is mainly tactile, although an olfactory element may sometimes coexist. The kiss thus understood is not very widely spread and is not usually found among rude and uncultured peoples. We can trace it in Aryan and Semitic antiquity, but in no very p.r.o.nounced form; Homer scarcely knew it, and the Greek poets seldom mention it. Today it may be said to be known all over Europe except in Lapland. Even in Europe it is probably a comparatively modern discovery; and in all the Celtic tongues, Rhys states, there is no word for "kiss," the word employed being always borrowed from the Latin pax.[202] At a fairly early historic period, however, the Welsh Cymri, at all events, acquired a knowledge of the kiss, but it was regarded as a serious matter and very sparingly used, being by law only permitted on special occasions, as at a game called rope-playing or a carousal; otherwise a wife who kissed a man not her husband could be repudiated. Throughout eastern Asia it is unknown; thus, in j.a.panese literature kisses and embraces have no existence. "Kisses, and embraces are simply unknown in j.a.pan as tokens of affection," Lafcadio Hearn states, "if we except the solitary fact that j.a.panese mothers, like mothers all over the world, lip and hug their little ones betimes. After babyhood there is no more hugging or kisses; such actions, except in the case of infants, are held to be immodest. Never do girls kiss one another; never do parents kiss or embrace their children who have become able to walk." This holds true, and has always held true, of all cla.s.ses; hand-clasping is also foreign to them. On meeting after a long absence, Hearn remarks, they smile, perhaps cry a little, they may even stroke each other, but that is all. j.a.panese affection "is chiefly shown in acts of exquisite courtesy and kindness."[203] Among nearly all of the black races of Africa lovers never kiss nor do mothers usually kiss their babies.[204] Among the American Indians the tactile kiss is, for the most part, unknown, though here and there, as among the Fuegians, lovers rub their cheeks together.[205] Kissing is unknown to the Malays. In North Queensland, however, Roth states, kissing takes place between mothers (not fathers) and infants, also between husbands and wives; but whether it is an introduced custom Roth is unable to say; he adds that the Pitta-pitta language possesses a word for kissing.[206]

It must be remarked, however, that in many parts of the world where the tactile kiss, as we understand it, is usually said to be unknown, it still exists as between a mother and her baby, and this seems to support the view advocated by Lombroso that the lovers' kiss is developed from the maternal kiss. Thus, the Angoni Zulus to the north of the Zambesi, Wiese states, kiss their small children on both cheeks[207] and among the Fuegians, according to Hyades, mothers kiss their small children.

Even in Europe the kiss in early mediaeval days was, it seems probable, not widely known as an expression of s.e.xual love; it would appear to have been a refinement of love only practiced by the more cultivated cla.s.ses. In the old ballad of Glasgerion the lady suspected that her secret visitor was only a churl, and not the knight he pretended to be, because when he came in his master's place to spend the night with her he kissed her neither coming nor going, but simply got her with child. It is only under a comparatively high stage of civilization that the kiss has been emphasized and developed in the art of love. Thus the Arabic author of the Perfumed Garden, a work revealing the existence of a high degree of social refinement, insists on the great importance of the kiss, especially if applied to the inner part of the mouth, and he quotes a proverb that "A moist kiss is better than a hasty coitus." Such kisses, as well as on the face generally, and all over the body, are frequently referred to by Hindu, Latin, and more modern erotic writers as among the most efficacious methods of arousing love.[208]

A reason which may have stood in the way of the development of the kiss in a s.e.xual direction has probably been the fact that in the near East the kiss was largely monopolized for sacred uses, so that its erotic potentialities were not easily perceived. Among the early Arabians the G.o.ds were worshiped by a kiss.[209] This was the usual way of greeting the house G.o.ds on entering or leaving.[210] In Rome the kiss was a sign of reverence and respect far more than a method of s.e.xual excitation.[211] Among the early Christians it had an all but sacramental significance. It retains its ancient and serious meaning in many usages of the Western and still more the Eastern Churches; the relics of saints, the foot of the pope, the hands of bishops, are kissed, just as the ancient Greeks kissed the images of the G.o.ds. Among ourselves we still have a legally recognized example of the sacredness of the kiss in the form of taking an oath by kissing the Testament.[212]

So far we have been concerned mainly with the tactile kiss, which is sometimes supposed to have arisen in remote times to the east of the Mediterranean-where the va.s.sal kissed his suzerain and where the kiss of love was known, as we learn from the Songs of Songs, to the Hebrews-and has now conquered nearly the whole of Europe. But over a much larger part of the world and even in one corner of Europe (Lapland, as well as among the Russian Yakuts) a different kind of salutation rules, the olfactory kiss. This varies in form in different regions and sometimes simulates a tactile kiss, but, as it exists in a typical form in China, where it has been carefully studied by d'Enjoy, it may be said to be made up of three phases: (1) the nose is applied to the cheek of the beloved person; (2) there is a long nasal inspiration accompanied by lowering of the eyelids; (3) there is a slight smacking of the lips without the application of the mouth to the embraced cheek. The whole process, d'Enjoy considers, is founded on s.e.xual desire and the desire for food, smell being the sense employed in both fields. In the form described by d'Enjoy, we have the Mongolian variety of the olfactory kiss. The Chinese regard the European kiss as odious, suggesting voracious cannibals, and yellow mothers in the French colonies still frighten children by threatening to give them the white man's kiss. Their own kiss the Chinese regard as exclusively voluptuous; it is only befitting as between lovers, and not only do fathers refrain from kissing their children except when very young, but even the mothers only give their children a rare and furtive kiss. Among some of the hill-tribes of south-east India the olfactory kiss is found, the nose being applied to the cheek during salutation with a strong inhalation; instead of saying "Kiss me," they here say "Smell me." The Tamils, I am told by a medical correspondent in Ceylon, do not kiss during coitus, but rub noses and also lick each other's mouth and tongue. The olfactory kiss is known in Africa; thus, on the Gambia in inland Africa when a man salutes a woman he takes her hand and places it to his nose, twice smelling the back of it. Among the Jekris of the Niger coast mothers rub their babies with their cheeks or mouths, but they do not kiss them, nor do lovers kiss, though they squeeze, cuddle, and embrace.[213] Among the Swahilis a smell kiss exists, and very young boys are taught to raise their clothes before women visitors, who thereupon playfully smell the p.e.n.i.s; the child who does this is said to "give tobacco."[214] Kissing of any kind appears to be unknown to the Indians throughout a large part of America: Im Thurn states that it is unknown to the Indians of Guiana, and at the other end of South America Hyades and Deniker state that it is unknown to the Fuegians. In Forth America the olfactory kiss is known to the Eskimo, and has been noted among some Indian tribes, as the Blackfeet. It is also known in Polynesia. At Samoa kissing was smelling.[215] In New Zealand, also, the hongi, or nose-pressing, was the kiss of welcome, of mourning, and of sympathy.[216] In the Malay archipelago, it is said, the same word is used for "greeting" and "smelling." Among the Dyaks of the Malay archipelago, however, Vaughan Stevens states that any form of kissing is unknown.[217] In Borneo, Breitenstein tells us, kissing is a kind of smelling, the word for smelling being used, but he never himself saw a man kiss a woman; it is always done in private.[218]

The olfactory kiss is thus seen to have a much wider extension over the world than the European (or Mediterranean) tactile kiss. In its most complete development, however, it is mainly found among the people of Mongolian race, or those yellow peoples more or less related to them.

The literature of the kiss is extensive. So far, however, as that literature is known to me, the following list includes everything that may be profitably studied: Darwin, The Expression of the Emotions; Ling Roth, "Salutations," Journal of the Anthropological Inst.i.tute, November, 1889; K. Andree, "Nasengruss," Ethnographische Parallelen, second series, 1889, pp. 223-227; Alfred Kirchhoff, "Vom Ursprung des Kusses," Deutsche Revue, May, 1895; Lombroso, "L'Origine du Baiser," Nouvelle Revue, 1897, p. 153; Paul d'Enjoy, "Le Baiser en Europe et en Chine," Bulletin de la Societe d'Anthropologie, Paris, 1897, fasc. 2. Professor Nyrop's book, The Kiss and its History (translated from the Danish by W. F. Harvey), deals rather with the history of the kiss in civilization and literature than with its biological origins and psychological significance.

[196]

E. Selous, Bird Watching, 1901, p. 191. This author adds: "It seems probable indeed that the conferring a practical benefit of the kind indicated may be the origin of the caress throughout nature."

[197]

Tylor terms the kiss "the salute by tasting," and d'Enjoy defines it as "a bite and a suction"; there seems, however, little evidence to show that the kiss contains any gustatory element in the strict sense.

[198]

Compayre, L'Evolution intellectuelle et morale de l'enfant, p. 9.

[199]

Mantegazza, Physiognomy and Expression, p. 144.

[200]

G. Stanley Hall, "The Early Sense of Self," American Journal of Psychology, April, 1898, p. 361.

[201]

In some parts of the world the impulse persists into adult life. Sir S. Baker (Ismailia, p. 472) mentions licking the eyes as a sign of affection.

[202]

Book of Common Prayer in Manx Gaelic, edited by A. W. Moore and J. Rhys, 1895.

[203]

L. Hearn, Out of the East, 1895, p. 103.

[204]

See, e.g., A. B. Ellis, Tshi-speaking Peoples, p. 288. Among the Swahili the kiss is practiced, but exclusively between married people and with very young children. Velten believes they learned it from the Arabs.

[205]

Hyades and Deniker, Mission Scientifique du Cap Horn, vol. vii, p. 245.

[206]

W. Roth, Ethnological Notes Among the Queensland Aborigines, p. 184.

[207]

Zeitschrift fur Ethnologie, 1900, ht. 5, p. 200.

[208]

E.g., the Kama Sutra of Vatsyayana, Bk. III, Chapter I.

[209]

Hosea, Chapter xiii, v. 2; I Kings, Chapter xix, v. 18.

[210]

Wellhausen, Reste Arabischen Heidentums, p. 109.

[211]

The Romans recognized at least three kinds of kiss: the osculum, for friendship, given on the face; the basium, for affection, given on the lips; the suavium, given between the lips, reserved for lovers.

[212]

In other parts of the world it would appear that the kiss sometimes has a sacred or ritual character. Thus, according to Rev. J. Macdonald (Journal of the Anthropological Inst.i.tute, November, 1890, p. 118), it is part of the initiation ceremony of a girl at her first menstruation that the women of the village should kiss her on the cheek, and on the mons veneris and l.a.b.i.a.

[213]

Journal of the Anthropological Inst.i.tute, August and November, 1898, p. 107.

[214]

Velten, Sitten und Gebrauche der Suaheli, p. 142.

[215]

Turner, Samoa, p. 45.

[216]

Tregear, Journal of the Anthropological Inst.i.tute, 1889.

[217]

Zeitschrift fur Ethnologie, 1896, ht. 4, p. 272.

[218]