Social Life Part 31

Every dinner should begin with soup, to be followed by fish, and include some kind of game. To this order there is no repeal, since "soup is to the dinner," says De la Regnier, "what the portico is to the building or the overture is to an opera." From this there is never any deviation.

A standard bill of fare for a well-regulated dinner is as follows:

Oysters on the Half-sh.e.l.l. Mock Turtle Soup.

Salmon with Lobster Sauce. Cuc.u.mbers. Chicken Croquettes.

Tomato Sauce. Roast Lamb with Spinach.

Canvas-back Duck. Celery. String Beans served on Toast.

Lettuce Salad. Cheese Omelet.

Pineapple Bavarian Cream. Charlotte Russe.

Ices. Fruits. Coffee.

Each course may be served on dishes different from the other courses; also fancy dishes, unlike any of the rest, may be used to pa.s.s relishes, such as olives, and add greatly to the beauty of the table service. Suitable sets for fish and game, decorated in accordance, are greatly to be admired.

Menu holders are frequently very pretty, and upon the menu card itself much taste and expense are sometimes lavished. Still it is not considered good taste to have them at every plate, for the reason that it savors too much of hotel style. The guests are expected to allow their gla.s.ses to be filled at every course. If it is something for which they do not care, they may content themselves with a few morsels of bread and a sip or two of water until the next course is served.

The host should always have a menu at his plate, that he may see if the dinner is moving properly in its appointed course.

Favors.

Very pretty favors besides flowers are frequently laid at the ladies'

plates to serve as souvenirs of the occasion. The location card or name card may be very beautifully painted. Other articles, such as decorated Easter eggs of plush, velvet, or satin handkerchief holders, fans, painted satin bags, etc., are all in good taste. Each of them, if possible, is made to open and disclose some choice confection. They may be ordered in quant.i.ty from some house dealing in such articles, or many of them can be prettily and inexpensively devised at home by any one having sufficient time and taste. Baskets of flowers, with bows of broad satin ribbon tied on one side the handle, are also suitable for both ladies and gentlemen.

Gentlemen's favors are usually useful, such as scarf pins, sleeve b.u.t.tons, small purses, etc.

Wines, and How to Serve Them.

Fortunately, since more than once the first lady in our land, for the time being, has proven to us by example that the stateliest of dinners may be wineless, it is far from necessary that wine should be served.

Still, if wines are to be used, they should be brought on correctly, each wine having its proper place in the varied courses of a dinner, as each note has its fit position in a chord of music.

By long-established custom certain wines have come to be taken with certain dishes. "Sherry and Sauterne," as given by a very good authority, "go with soup and fish; Hock and Claret with roast meats; Punch with turtle; Champagne with sweet breads or cutlets; Port with venison; Port or Burgundy with other game; sparkling wines between the meats and the confectionery; Madeira with sweets; Port with cheese; Sherry and Claret, Port, Tokay and Madeira with dessert."

Red wines should never be iced, even in summer; Claret and Burgundy should always be slightly warmed (left in a warm room is sufficient).

Claret-cup and Champagne are iced (some epicures object to this). Cool the wines in the bottles. To put clear ice in the gla.s.ses is simply to weaken the quality and flavor of the wine, and, as a matter of fact, to serve wine and water.

The gla.s.ses for the various wines are usually grouped at the right of the plate, and as different styles and sizes are used for different wines, it is well for the novice to be accustomed to these in order to avoid the awkwardness of putting forward the wrong gla.s.s. High and narrow, also very broad and shallow gla.s.ses, are used for Champagne; large, goblet-shaped gla.s.ses for Burgundy and a ruby-red gla.s.s for Claret; ordinary winegla.s.ses for Sherry and Madeira; green Bohemian gla.s.ses for Hock; and large, bell-shaped gla.s.ses for Port.

Port, Sherry and Madeira are decanted. Hock and Champagne appear in their native bottles. Claret and Burgundy are handed around in a claret jug. In handing a bottle fresh from the ice-chest the waiter wraps a napkin around it to absorb the moisture.

Coffee and liquors should be handed around when the dessert has been about a quarter of an hour on the table. After this the ladies usually retire, a custom that has happily fallen into disrepute, the coffee being served without the liquors, and ladies and gentlemen partaking of it together. Roman punch is served in all manner of dainty conceits as to gla.s.s, imitations of flowers, etc.

Never allow servants to overfill the winegla.s.ses. Ladies never empty their gla.s.ses, and usually take but one kind of wine. This is especially true of young ladies, who, very often, do not taste their one gla.s.s.

Gracefully Declined.

If wine is not desired from principle, merely touching the brim of the gla.s.s with the finger-tip is all the refusal a well-trained servant needs. A still better plan is to permit one gla.s.s to be filled and allow it to stand untasted at your plate. In responding to a health, it is ungracious not to, at least, lift the gla.s.s and let its contents touch the lips.

Never make your refusal of wine conspicuous. Your position as guest in no wise appoints you a censor of your host's conduct in offering wine at his table, and any marked feeling displayed on the subject would simply show a want of consideration and good breeding.

A dinner given to a person of known temperance principles is often marked, in compliment, by an entire absence of wine.

If there is but one wine served with a simple dinner, it should be Sherry or Claret, and should be in gla.s.s decanters on the table. The guests can help themselves; the hostess can offer it immediately after soup.

The announcement of dinner is given as quietly as possible. The butler, or head waiter, who should be in full evening dress, minus gloves, quietly says, "Dinner is served," or, as in France, "Madame is served." Better still, he catches the eye of the hostess and simply bows, whereupon she immediately rises, and the guests following her example, the order of the procession to the dining-room is formed at once. The waiters, aside from the head one, are usually in livery.

Order of Precedence.

In the matter of going out to dinner the host takes precedence, giving his right arm to the most honored lady guest. If the dinner is given in honor of any particular guest, she is the one chosen, if not, any bride that may be present, or the oldest lady, or some visitor from abroad. The other guests then fall in line, gentlemen having had their partners pointed out to them, and wherever necessary, introductions are given. The hostess comes last of all, having taken the arm of the gentleman most to be honored. In the dining-room no precedence is observed after the host, save that the younger couples draw back and allow their elders to be seated. Precedence of rank is not as common here as in Europe.

On entering the door, if it is not wide enough to permit of two entering abreast, the gentleman falls back a step and permits the lady to enter first. All remain standing until the hostess seats herself, when the guests find their places, either by means of name cards at their plates, or by a few quiet directions, the gentlemen being seated last. The highest place of honor for gentlemen is at the right of the hostess, the next, at her left, and for ladies at the right and left of their host.

The hostess should never eclipse her guests in her toilet, and neither host nor hostess should endeavor to shine in conversation. To draw out the guests, to lead the conversation in pleasant channels, to break up long discussions, and to discover all possibilities of brilliancy in the company around their board, should be their aim.

The hostess must never press dishes upon her guests, but they are permitted, if they wish, to praise any viand that has pleased them.

The hostess must appear to be eating until all the company have finished, and her watchful eye must see that every want is supplied.

At the close of the repast the hostess slightly bows to the lady at the right of the host, when all the guests rise and return in order to the drawing-room.

Where gentlemen remain around the table for that fraction of an hour,--

"Across the walnuts and the wine,"

all rise, and the gentlemen remain standing until the ladies leave the room. The gentleman who had the honor of escorting the hostess into the table, walks with her to the door; here she pauses to allow the host's companion to pa.s.s through, when the host, who has escorted her thither, returns to the table, the other gentlemen following his example. The hostess is the last lady to leave the room, whereupon her escort closes the door and returns to the table, where the gentlemen group themselves carelessly at one end of the table, for that half hour of conversation and cigars. Where wine is not used the gentlemen frequently remain behind for smoking, and some hosts immediately withdraw with them to the smoking-room. Coffee is frequently served in the drawing-room, where the ladies have had their little chat after the return thither of the gentlemen.

Informal and Easy.

The hostess, a.s.sisted by a daughter, or a young lady friend, usually pours the beverage, and the gentlemen pa.s.s it around to the ladies, thus forming the most delightfully informal groups for conversation.

Sugar is pa.s.sed by a servant, or else the hostess drops two or three lumps of it in each saucer, a sugar bowl, with sugar tongs, standing beside her. Cream is not the correct thing for after-dinner coffee.

Very many hostesses, however, prefer to have coffee and fruits finish the table menu, after which the entire party retire to the drawing-room, where, for the half or three-quarters of an hour preceding their departure, soft music from some hidden orchestra may be permitted to fill the air with harmony. Occasionally, a little programme is arranged of music and song, to fill this interval. But, in many cases, and wisely, conversation is the preferred entertainment.

French Terms.

Good taste now dictates that the bill of fare, where one is printed or written, should be couched in the "King's English," yet, one is so frequently thrown in positions where a knowledge of the French terms so often used in such cases is somewhat of necessity, that a short glossary of the same may be useful:

_Menu_ Bill of fare.

_Cafe et noir_ Black coffee.

_Cafe au lait_ Coffee with milk.

A dinner begins with,

_Huitres_ Oysters.

Followed by,