Simply Magic Part 5

aThough I do not suppose,a she said, ayou were allowed to do it as a boy.a aHow did you guess?a He grinned down at her. aNot when I was at home, at least. I did all sorts of things at school and university that had never been allowed at home, on the theory that what my mother and sisters did not see would not cause them grief.a She remembered how one of his sisters had pulled him away from the bank of the lake where he had been trying to fish with her line, horrified that he might fall in and die. An eager, active little boy had not even been allowed to sit at the wateras edge with a fishing line in his hand.

aI cannot remember the last time I was vanquished in a boat race,a he said as they stepped onto the bridge. aAccept my most heartfelt congratulations!a She laughed. aSomeone has to keep you humble.a aUnkind,a he said. aI did admit to having lost a curricle race, if you will remember.a aBy a long nose,a she said. aI wonder how long. An elephantas trunk stretched on the rack, perhaps?a aSometimes,a he said, aI believe that your tongue must be sharp enough to slice through a slab of tough beef.a She laughed again.

aAnd had you rowed before this afternoon?a he asked her. aPlease say yes. My humiliation will be complete if the answer is no.a aA few times long ago, when I was a child,a she said. aBut I have not tried it since.a aAnd where was that?a he asked.

aOh, where I grew up,a she said vaguely.

They stopped by unspoken consent when they reached the middle of the bridge. She had crossed it before, on her last visit to Barclay Court, but there had been no opportunity this afternoon until now. The sun beamed down upon them from a cloudless blue sky. A slight breeze cooled her face. She could hear the river rushing beneath the bridge. If she turned her head she would see the sunlight sparkling on the lake water behind them.

All her senses were sharpened. She could feel his body heat. She could smell his cologne. It was an intensely pleasurable feeling. She felt awash in contentment.

aI noticed,a he said, awhen I sat inside the pavilion earlier that the reflection of the house is perfectly framed in the lake water. That particular spot was obviously chosen with great care by the landscape artist. He must have been a master of his art.a aOh, yes,a she agreed. aI am sure he was.a aDo you suppose that waterfall has been as artfully positioned as the pavilion?a he asked. aIs it there in that exact spot for maximum visual effect from here?a aPerhaps it was the bridge that was deliberately placed,a she suggested.

aOr both,a he said. aMy money is upon its being both.a aBut can nature be so ordered?a she asked him.

aa.s.suredly so,a he told her. aDo we not often plant flowers and vegetables in ruthlessly regimented rows and beds for our own convenience and pleasure? And can we not create a waterfall if we wish? We manipulate nature all the time. In fact, we often make the mistake of believing that we are its masters. And then a storm blows in from nowhere and lifts the roofs off our houses and floods them and reminds us of how little control we have and how helpless we are in reality. Have you noticed that once-mighty structures that have been abandoned are soon taken over by nature again? Wildflowers grow in the crevices of once-impregnable castle walls, and gra.s.s grows on palace floors where kings once entertained the elite of an empire.a aI find that thought rea.s.suring more than frightening,a she said. aI have heard of how ugly some parts of the country are becoming with the slag heaps from coal mines and other waste products of industry. I do not suppose those activities will end anytime soon. But when they do enda"if they ever doa"perhaps nature will reclaim the land and erase the man-made ugliness and create beauty again.a aI have an uneasy feeling,a he said, athat if we continue to stand here, someone or other is going to feel invited to join us. I do not wish to be joined, do you?a aNo.a She looked up at him, her cheeks warming at the admission.

aAnd if we walk toward the pavilion, the same thing might happen,a he said. aI can see that there is a path beside the river on the other side of the lake. My guess is that it goes as far as the waterfall.a aIt does. And beyond,a she told him. aIt is part of the wilderness walk that begins close to the house and extends all about the lake. I have walked along parts of it with Frances, but I have never been to the waterfall. The path is rather rugged in that area and there had been a lot of rain just before I came here last time. The earl thought it might be unsafe.a He looked down at her thin shoes.

aIs it too rugged,a he asked, afor someone who just won three separate boat races, including, to my eternal shame, the final one?a aI have always thought,a she said, athat the walk must be at its wildest and loveliest by the waterfall.a aWe will walk there and back, then,a he said, aand hope that no one else is adventurous enough to follow us.a She took his arm again, and they proceeded on their way.

Susanna wished as they walked that she could seal up every minute in a jar and take them all with her into the future. She did not believe she had ever been as happy as she was when they turned onto the river path and she could feel confident that they would be alone together for at least half an hour.

She could not think of anyone with whom she would rather share such beauty and solitude.

aAh, magnificent!a Viscount Whitleaf said, stopping on the path when they were in the shade of a forest of tall trees and looking back to where the waters of the river bubbled and foamed beneath the bridge to join the calmer lake water, which was indeed sparkling in the sunshine.

He was genuinely admiring the scenery. It was something that just a week ago she would not have expected of him. She had judged him to be a man who could be happy only when surrounded by adoring females.

aI think Barclay Court must be one of the loveliest estates in England,a she said. aNot that I have seen many others.a aOr any?a He turned his head and his eyes smiled at her.

aOne other,a she said, stung. aThe place where I grew up.a He raised his eyebrows. aAnd where was that? You have never spoken of your childhood, have youa"except that you missed your mother?a aIt does not matter,a she said.

She wondered what he would say if she told him and he realized that they had once been neighbors of sorts. She wondered if he would have any memory at all of that day by the lake when he had visited with his mother and sisters and they had met briefly. And she wondered if he would remember everything that had happened later.

But a painful churning in her stomach warned her not to say any morea"or think any morea"about that.

aNow, Miss...o...b..urne,a he said with mock severity, aone of the cardinal rules of friendship is that one withhold nothing from the friend.a aBut that is not so,a she told him. aEven friends need private s.p.a.ces, if only within the depths of their own soul, where no one else is allowed to intrude.a He was looking fully at her, obviously pondering the truth of what she said.

aThere are deep, dark secrets from your past that you would rather keep, then, are there?a he said, waggling his eyebrows. aVery well, then. But you grew up on an estate, did you? As a daughter of the house?a aAs daughter of aaa servant of sorts,a she said. aHe was a gentleman, but he was without property or fortune and so had no choice but to work for a living. And so I suppose I am a lady by birth even if only just. Are you satisfied?a He smiled slowly, and it struck her that the creases at the corners of his eyes would be permanently etched there when he was older. They would be an attractive feature.

aThat I have not made a friend of a chimney sweepas offspring?a he asked her. aThat would have been enough to send me off into a fit of the vapors, would it not? The path slopes upward rather sharply from here, I see, though there are several large, flat stones to act as steps. Are you sure you are up to the climb?a aAre you?a She laughed at him.

aEarlier on,a he said, aI thought I heard the echo of something you told me several days ago, though it might have been my imagination. You are not a games teacher, by any chance, are you, Miss...o...b..urne? In a girlsa school?a aI am,a she said. aI teach games, and sometimes I cannot stop myself from partic.i.p.ating in them. I was always good at them when I was a pupil myself. Yes, there are girlsa schools that teach more than embroidery and deportment.a aHeaven help us,a he said, wincing. aI was about to play the gallant and offer my hand for the climb instead of my arm. I will still do so, in fact. If I do not need to haul you up the path, you can haul me.a He took her hand in a firm clasp and she thought for one absurd moment that she might well weep. It seemed to her that no one had ever held her hand before, though surely her father must have done so when she was a child. There was such intimacy in the gesture, such an implied bond of trust.

His hand was slender and long-fingered. It was also strong and warm and somehow very masculine. Something tightened in her b.r.e.a.s.t.s, and her inner thighs suddenly ached though they had not even begun the climb yet. Something fluttered low in her abdomen.

She had, she admitted, grown very fond of him very fast. Belatedly it occurred to her that perhaps it had not been a good idea after all to agree to be his friend. Next week, when she was back in Bath, she was going to miss him, and she knew that the missing him would bring considerable pain, even grief.

But there was no point in thinking of that now. It was too late to make a different decision and keep her distance from him. And she was not sure she would have decided differently even if she had known then what she knew now. Her life had been so very sheltered. She must not regret walking out into the sunshine, even if only for a brief while.

And he was someone about whom the sun seemed to shine.

Hand in hand they clambered up the steep path even though it was not in any way treacherous and she did not really need his supporta"or he hers. They stood hand in hand and breathless when they stopped halfway up to look down over the steep bank to the fast-flowing water below. The dappled surface of the river and the lights and shades cast on the greenery by the sun shining through tree branches created a stark contrast with the bright, open, calm lake still fully visible off to their left.

The magic of it all a.s.saulted her anewa"the beauties of nature at their finest and a new friend.

They did not exchange a word. They did not need to. Their thoughts were in perfect harmonya"she could sense that. After a few minutes they resumed the climb while the rushing sound of the waterfall drowned out all other soundsa"except, she noticed, the shrill song of an invisible bird.

They scrambled the last few feet to the crest of the rise, on a level with the top of the waterfall. The view was breathtaking. Susanna could feel droplets of water cool on her face. Although the lake was still in viewa"as well as the other picnickersa"there was an air of wild seclusion here. Perhaps it had something to do with the sound of the water.

They stood hand in hand gazing at the waterfall until Viscount Whitleaf looked behind him.

aAh,a he said, aa grotto built artfully into the hillside to look like a natural cave. I almost expected to see it there. And of course it is facing in just the right direction. Capability Brown and his ilk could always be relied upon to provide such conveniences on wilderness walks. Shall we sit for a while?a aIt ought to be cool in there,a she said hopefully. Climbing had been a warm business even though the trees had protected them from the direct sunlight for much of the way.

The grotto was provided with a wooden bench that circled the inner wall. It was the perfect shelter from sun or wind or rain or simple weariness, a place to sit and feast the senses on the beauties provided by naturea"even if man had lent a helping hand. The opening to the outside world was framed on three sides with lush green ferns.

The waterfall was centered in their line of vision, just as the reflection of the house was from the pavilion on the lake. Ferns grew thick on the steep banks on either side and trees stretched above. There were the smells of water and greenery and earth. And of course there was the sound of rushing watera"and of the song of the lone bird.

aI like friendship,a he said softly, after they had sat in silence for several minutes. aIt enables one not to talk.a He chuckled. aDoes that make sense?a aYes,a she said. aSilence is an uncomfortable thing between casual acquaintances or strangers.a aLike you and me the day we met,a he said. aWere you uncomfortable?a aVery,a she admitted.

aWhy?a She had taken her hand from his when they sat down in order to settle her skirts about her. Now she realized her hand was in his again, though she did not know how it had got there. Their clasped hands were lying on her skirt on the bench between them.

aYou were Viscount Whitleaf,a she said, ahandsome, fashionable, obviously wealthy, sure of yourself, a man of the world.a aShallow,a he added, aconceited, flirtatious.a aI judged too hastily,a she said.

She was aware for several silent moments that he was looking at her.

aAnd there was another reason,a she said hastily. aYou were Viscount Whitleaf. I grew up not far from Sidley Park.a aGood Lord,a he said after a moment or two of silence. aOsbourne. He was Sir Charles Markhamas secretary for years when Markham was a government minister. I thought of him when you were introduced to me, but Osbourne is not an entirely uncommon name. I did not dreamaWhen I come to think of it, though, I recall that he did have a daughter. You?a aYes,a she said, considerably shaken. She had really not intended telling him who she was.

aDid we ever meet?a he asked.

aOnce,a she said. aYou came down to the lake, where I was playing with Edith, but two of your sisters came and took you away. One of them did not like the fact that you were playing with me, and the other was afraid you would fall in and drown.a aI donat remember,a he said. aBut wait. Was there something with a fishing line?a aYes,a she said. aYou wanted to try mine. You thought you might have better luck than I had had, but actually I do not believe there were any fish in that lake. I never heard of anyone catching any there.a aThat was you,a he said. aI do remember. Vaguely, anyway.a And it would be as well, she thought, if the memories were left there, vague and unspecific.

aYour father died,a he said.

She turned her head and looked sharply at him.

aYes.a aI am so sorry,a he said, athough it seems a little late to commiserate with you. It was sudden, was it not? A heart attack?a Ah, he really did not know, then. He really had been sheltered by all his various guardians.

aYes,a she said. aHis heart stopped.a Which was certainly not a lie.

aI am sorry,a he said again. aBut tell me how you ended up as a charity pupil at Miss Martinas school in Bath.a She had never spoken about her past. Deep as was her trust in her three closest friends, she had never entrusted them with the whole of her storya"just as they had never revealed everything of their past to her. Friends really did need secret places inside themselves. But he already knew more than they ever had.

She closed her eyes for a few moments.

aI do beg your pardon,a he said, squeezing her hand more tightly. aPlease forgive me for arousing what are obviously painful memories.a She had learned to cope with her essential aloneness, not even to dwell upon it. And she did have her employment now and friends who were almost as good as family. But there had been a time when she had felt like a helpless babe all alone and abandoned in a vast and hostile universe. She doubted there was any worse feeling. Even her very survival had been in question.

aMr. Hatchard sent me to the school,a she said. aHe is Claudia Martinas solicitor and agent in London. He sought me out when I was seeking a position through an employment agency. At first, when he asked me if I had ever been to Bath, I thought he had some employment to offer me there. But then he explained that there was a place at a school there for me if I wanted ita"as a pupil. He told me that someone he represented was willing to pay my fees, that in fact I would be one of several charity pupils.a She could clearly remember the mingled relief and humiliation with which she had listened to his wholly unexpected offer.

aAnd you accepted,a Viscount Whitleaf said.

aI really had no choice,a she told him. aI was staring starvation in the face. I had had only one promising interviewa"for a position as a ladyas maid. I had said at the agency that I was fifteen though I was only twelve. But the lady who interviewed me did not believe me and dismissed me out of hand. She was not the housekeeper, as I had expected, but my prospective employer herself. She told me that since she was going to have to put up with the maid who was hired, she was going to have the choosing of her. I was terrified of her, even though she was very young herself. And yet I have always had the strange conviction that she must have had something to do with Mr. Hatchardas finding me.a aReally?a he said.

aHow else would he have found me and why else would he have singled me out?a she asked. aLondon is teeming with dest.i.tute girls. And her name keeps popping up in connection with the school in the most puzzling way. Claudia Martin was once her governess but left in outrage at her unruly behavior and haughty manners. Then she turned up unexpectedly at the school one day after I was there and asked Claudia if she needed anything. Poor Claudia was outraged. But the school has a secret benefactor, you see. It seems never to have occurred to Claudia that perhaps it is Lady Hallmere herself, but I wonder if perhaps it is.a aLady Hallmere?a he said.

aShe was Lady Freyja Bedwyn before her marriage,a she explained. aSister of the Duke of Bewcastle. And then she married the Marquess of Hallmere, who just happens to have his home and estate in Cornwall, in the exact place where Anne Jewell lived before she was recommended to the school as a teacher.a aI know the Bedwyn family,a he said. aBewcastle is a close neighbor of my cousin Lauren, Viscountess Ravensberg.a He grinned. aI do not imagine that being Lady Hallmereas governess would have been a comfortable thing. And I would guess that you had a fortunate escape in not being taken on as her maid. She is a formidable lady. But you think it was she who sent you to Bath? Interesting!a aI may be wrong,a she said.

And if she had needed any further reminder that he was of a different world from her own, here it was. He actually knew Lady Hallmere and the Bedwyn family. His cousin was a viscountess.

But such knowledge was no longer a cause for intimidation. She and Viscount Whitleaf were indeed friends, she believed, though only for a short while. Soon they would return to their separate worlds.

She withdrew her hand from his, smoothed out her skirt without looking at him, and got up to step outside the grotto and stand on the path looking out on the waterfall. He followed her out.

aI have been very fortunate in my life,a she said. aOnce I had settled at the school I was very happy there. And since becoming a teacher I have been happier.a aIn some ways,a he said, aI envy you.a She looked up sharply into his face to see if he joked. What a very strange thing to say! But he was squinting off toward the waterfall and seemed to be talking to himself rather than to her. He had certainly not been joking. When he looked back at her, he was smiling again.

aAre you preparing to dance the night away at the a.s.sembly tomorrow?a he asked her.

aIt is a country entertainment, Lord Whitleaf,a she said. aI daresay it will be over well before midnight.a aOne of the first things I noticed about you,a he said, awas that you are literal-mindeda"hearts as organs in the chest, for example. My poetas soul still winces over that one. Let me rephrase my question, then. Are you preparing to dance the evening away?a aI am preparing to enjoy myself,a she said. aI have never been to a ball or even a country a.s.sembly.a aNever?a He looked arrested. aYou do not know how to dance, then?a aLearning to dance is a necessary part of any ladyas education,a she said, aeven if she is only a charity pupil. We have a dancing master at the schoola"Mr. Huckerby. I learned from him. And now I often demonstrate the dances with him while the girls look on.a aBut you have never danced at a ball,a he said quietly.

She felt horribly embarra.s.sed then. That was one pathetic piece of information she ought to have kept to herself.

aWe should go back,a she said. aIt must be getting late. Everyone will be thinking of going home, and our long absence will be remarked upon.a aMiss...o...b..urne,a he said abruptly, awill you dance the first waltz with me at the a.s.sembly?a Oh!

She stared at him, filled with such longing that for a moment she could not even speak. aOh,a she said then, athere is no need to ask such a thing just because I told you it will be my first a.s.sembly and I am in a sense your friend.a He seized her hand again then, but not just to hold. He raised it to his lips and held it there for a few moments while he looked intently into her eyes over the top of it.

aWhat does this in a sense mean?a he asked. aHow can two people be friends in a sense? Either we are or we are not. I have asked you to waltz with me because I wish to waltz with you and no one else. Sometimes motives are as simple as that.a She had watched her hand held against his lips, and she had felt it therea"not just with the hand itself but with every cell in her body. No man had ever made her such a courtly gesture before. Ah, no one had. And it felt very good indeed. It felt more than just good.

And then his face blurred before her vision and she realized in some horror that her eyes had filled with tears.

She tried to pull her hand away, but he held on to it, his grasp tightening.

aSusanna,a he said, ahave I upset you? I do beg your pardon. Do you not wisha"a aYes,a she said shakily, dashing her free hand across her eyes. aI do. I will. I mean, it would give me the greatest pleasure to waltz with you, my lord. Thank you.a But her stomach felt as if it had performed a somersault inside her. He had called her Susanna. How foolish to be so affected by that slight breach of good mannersa"by that wonderful sign of friendship.

He bowed elegantly over her hand and grinned at her.

aThe evening preceding that waltz will be dull indeed,a he told her, his free hand over his heart.

Ah, he had seen that she was upset and otherwise discomposed, she realized. And so he was deliberately lightening the atmosphere by teasing her, even flirting with her. Oh, he was a kind man.

aNonsense, Lord Whitleaf,a she said with a laugh that came out on a strange gurgle. aI have not forgotten that you are engaged to dance at least the first four sets of the evening with other partners. You cannot pretend that the prospect of so much female company is dull.a He chuckled.

aBut I had engaged to dance with them,a he said, abefore I even met you. Once I did, I became impervious to all other female charms.a aFlatterer!a She clucked her tongue and laughed again, with genuine amus.e.m.e.nt this time, and withdrew her hand from his.

aI am speaking the truth, you know,a he added. aI have found that friendship is far more stimulating than flirtation.a aThe female population of England would go into a collective decline if they heard you say such a thing,a she said. aWe must go back.a aMust we?a he said. aOr shall we run away and stay away forever and ever? Do you ever wish you could do that?a aNo.a But she gazed wistfully at him. Sometimes she did wish it. She had run away once. But in her dreams she could sometimes flya aYou once told me you were not a romantic,a he said. aAre you not an adventurer either?a aNo,a she said. aMy feet are firmly planted on the ground.a aAnd your heart firmly pumping away in your chest,a he said, reaching out one hand to brush his knuckles lightly beneath her chin. aI am not quite sure I believe you, Miss...o...b..urnea"on either count. But you are right, I suppose. If we are not to run away together, we had better return.a He fell into step beside her and they proceeded on their way in a silence that soon became companionable again.

But a nameless yearning grew in her as they descended the patha"a yearning perhaps to throw caution to the winds and step out of herself entirely into an unknowna An unknown what?

Adventure?

Romance?

Neither was being offered her with any seriousness, and she would refuse even if they were. Dreams were all very well as long as one never confused them with reality.

The reality was that she was walking beside Viscount Whitleaf along the wilderness walk at Barclay Court during a lovely summer afternoon. The reality was that she was going to waltz with him tomorrow evening at her first-ever a.s.sembly. Even after that there would still be three days of her holiday left.

There was nothing whatsoever wrong with reality. Reality was very close to being perfect.

And even after those three days were over there would be Anne and Claudia waiting for her in Bath and the security of her teaching position. There would be the other teachers and the girls, including several new ones. There would be all the challenge of a new school year to prepare for. And pleasant memories of her holiday.

aA penny for your thoughts,a he said after they were down the steep part of the path and were drawing closer to the lake.

aI was realizing how many blessings I have to count,a she said.

aWere you?a He looked more closely at her. aIn my experience people count blessings only when they are feeling sad. Are you sad?a aNo,a she said. aHow could I be?a He heaved a deep sigh, which he did not immediately explain.

aIt beats me,a he said after a short silence. aBut I feel melancholy too.a Mr. Dannen and Mr. Raycroft were coming across the bridge to meet them with Miss Moss, Miss Krebbs, and Miss Jane Calvert. Soon the two groups came together, and a great deal of chatter and laughter ensued.

By the time they reached the picnic side of the bridge, Mr. Dannen had taken Susanna on his arm, and Viscount Whitleaf had offered one of his to Miss Krebbs and the other to Miss Jane Calvert. Mr. Raycroft was walking beside them.

The viscount was telling them that he had thought it was the late afternoon sunlight that was dazzling his eyes at the center of the bridge until he realized that it was their presence there that had been doing it.

The rogue!

But of course they were not taken in by such flatteries for a single moment. The tone of their laughter told Susanna that.

He was being kind to them, bringing happiness and gaiety to their day.

He had also donned a mask of frivolity. Or maybe it was not a mask at all. Maybe he had a gift for spreading joy. And yet he had said just moments ago that he felt melancholy. Could he feel both?

Yes, perhaps so. She was feeling both. She was living through one of the most joyful afternoons of her entire life. And yeta And yet soon they would go separately back into their own very separate universes.

8.

The mood of slight melancholy that had oppressed Susanna after the picnic had disappeared without a trace by the time she arrived with Frances and the Earl of Edgecombe at the a.s.sembly rooms above the village inn the following evening.

She doubted she had ever been more excited in her life, though she tried very hard not to show ita"without a great deal of success, it seemed.

aWell, Susanna,a the earl said as he handed her down from the carriage, ayou are fairly sparkling, I must say. Jewels would be superfluous.a She was wearing none, of course. But then neither was Frances. Susanna suspected that despite the fact that her friend wore a gorgeous royal-blue satin gown, which was clearly expensive and made by the most skilled of seamstresses, Frances was actually making a deliberate effort not to outshine either Susanna or her less affluent neighbors.

Frances linked her arm through Susannaas as they stepped inside the inn, leaving the earl to follow them in.

aI know just how you must be feeling,a she said. aI remember how I felt that night in Bath when Luciusas grandfather and sister had invited me to a ball in the Upper a.s.sembly Rooms. I was half frightened to death and half elated to death. Do you remember?a aClaudia, Anne, and I noticed at the last moment that part of your hem was down,a Susanna said, aand we were all involved in st.i.tching it up again with you inside ita"in the school hallway of all placesa"when Mr. Keeble let the Earl of Edgecombe in, or Viscount Sinclair, as he was then.a They both laughed at the memory and there was a low chuckle from behind them to indicate that the earl appreciated the joke too.