Short Stories by Robert A. Heinlein Vol 2 Part 170

Bodie was waiting for us in the lobby of the capitol. I could see that he was excited about something, for he flipped away a cigarette and rushed towards us.

Look!' he commanded. Down there!'

We followed the direction of his finger and saw two figures just going out of the big doors. One was Ditworth, the other was a well-known lobbyist with whom he had worked. What about it?' Joe demanded.

I was standing here behind this phone booth, leaning against the wall and catching a cigarette. As you can see, from here that big mirror reflects the bottom of the rotunda stairs. I kept an eye on it for you fellows. I noticed this lobbyist, Sims, coming downstairs by himself, but he was gesturing as if he were talking to somebody. That made me curious, so I looked around the corner of the booth and saw him directly. He was not alone; he was with Ditworth. I looked back at the mirror and he appeared to be alone. Ditworth cast no reflection in the mirror!'

Jedson snapped his fingers. A demon!' he said in an amazed voice. And I never suspected it!'

I am surprised that more suicides don't occur on trains. When a man is down, I know of nothing more depressing than staring at the monotonous scenery and listening to the maddening lickety-tock of the rails. In a way I was glad to have this new development of Ditworth's inhuman status to think about; it kept my mind off poor old Feldstein and his thousand dollars.

Startling as it was to discover that Ditworth was a demon, it made no real change in the situation except to explain the efficiency and speed with which we had been outmanoeuvred and to confirm as a certainty our belief that the racketeers and Magic, Incorporated, were two heads of the same beast. But we had no way of proving that Ditworth was a Half World monster. If we tried to haul him into court for a test, he was quite capable of lying low and sending out a facsimile, or a mandrake, built to look like him and immune to the mirror test.

We dreaded going back and reporting our failure to the committee - at least I did. But at least we were spared that. The Middle Counties Act carried an emergency clause which put it into effect the day it was signed. Ditworth's bill, as an amendment, went into action with the same speed. The newspapers on sale at the station when we got off the train carried the names of the new commissioners for thaumaturgy.

Nor did the commission waste any time in making its power felt. They announced their intention of raising the standards of magical practice in all fields, and stated that new and more thorough examinations would be prepared at once. The a.s.sociation formerly headed by Ditworth opened a coaching school in which practising magicians could take a refresher course in thaumaturgic principles and arcane law. In accordance with the high principles set forth in their charter, the school was not restricted to members of the a.s.sociation.

That sounds bighearted of the a.s.sociation. It wasn't. They managed to convey a strong impression in their cla.s.ses that membership in the a.s.sociation would be a big help in pa.s.sing the new examinations. Nothing you could put your finger on to take into court - just a continuous impression. The a.s.sociation grew.

A couple of weeks later all licences were cancelled and magicians were put on a day-to-day basis in their practice, subject to call for re-examination at a day's notice. A few of the outstanding holdouts against signing up with Magic,

Incorporated, were called up, examined, and licences refused them. The squeeze was on. Mrs Jennings quietly withdrew from any practice. Bodie came around to see me; I had an uncompleted contract with him involving some apartment houses.

Here's your contract, Archie,' he said bitterly. I'll need some time to pay the penalties for noncompletion; my bond was revoked when they cancelled the licences.'

I took the contract and tore it in two. Forget that talk about penalties,' I told him. You take your examinations and we'll write a new contract.~

He laughed unhappily. Don't be a Pollyanna.'

I changed my tack. What are you going to do? Sign up with Magic, Incorporated?'

He straightened himself up. I've never temporized with demons; I won't start now.'

Good boy,' I said. Well, if the eating gets uncertain, I reckon we can find a job of some sort here for you.'

It was a good thing that Bodie had some money saved, for I was a little too optimistic in my offer. Magic, Incorporated, moved quickly into the second phase of their squeeze, and it began to be a matter of speculation as to whether I myself would eat regularly. There were still quite a number of licensed magicians in town who were not employed by Magic, Incorporated - it would have been an evident, actionable frame-up to freeze out everyone - but those available were all incompetent bunglers, not fit to mix a philter. There was no competent, legal magical a.s.sistance to be got at any price - except through

Magic, Incorporated.

I was forced to fall back on old-fashioned methods in every respect. Since I don't use much magic in any case, it was possible for me to do that, but it was the difference between making money and losing money.

I had put Feldstein on as a salesman after his agency folded up under him. He turned out to be a crackajack and helped to reduce the losses. He could smell a profit even farther than I could - farther than Dr Worthington could smell a witch.

But most of the other businessmen around me were simply forced to capitulate.

Most of them used magic in at least one phase of their business; they had their choice of signing a contract with Magic, Incorporated, or closing their doors.

They had wives and kids - they signed.

The fees for thaumaturgy were jacked up until they were all the traffic would bear, to the point where it was just cheaper to do business with magic than without it. The magicians got none of the new profits; it all stayed with the corporation. As a matter of fact, the magicians got less of the proceeds than when they had operated independently, but they took what they could get and were glad of the chance to feed their families.

Jedson was hard hit - disastrously hit. He held out, naturally, preferring honourable bankruptcy to dealing with demons, but he used magic throughout his business. He was through. They started by disqualifying August Welker, his foreman, then cut off the rest of his resources. It was intimated that Magic,

Incorporated, did not care to deal with him, even had he wished it.

We were all over at Mrs Jennings's late one afternoon for tea - myself, Jedson,

Bodie, and Dr Royce Worthington, the witch smeller. We tried to keep the conversation away from our troubles, but we just could not do it. Anything that was said led back somehow to Ditworth and his d.a.m.nable monopoly.

After Jack Bodie had spent ten minutes explaining carefully and mendaciously that he really did not mind being out of witchcraft, that he did not have any real talent for it, and had only taken it up to please his old man, I tried to change the subject. Mrs Jennings had been listening to Jack with such pity and compa.s.sion in her eyes that I wanted to bawl myself.

I turned to Jedson and said inanely, How is Miss Megeath?'

She was the white witch from Jersey City, the one who did creative magic in textiles. I had no special interest in her welfare.

He looked up with a start. Ellen? She's ... she's all right. They took her licence away a month ago,' he finished lamely.

That was not the direction I wanted the talk to go. I turned it again. Did she ever manage to do that whole-garment stunt?'

He brightened a little. Why, yes, she did - once. Didn't I tell you about it?'

Mrs Jennings showed polite curiosity, for which I silently thanked her. Jedson explained to the others what they had been trying to accomplish. She really succeeded too well,' he continued. Once she had started, she kept right on, and we could not bring her out of her trance. She turned out over thirty thousand little striped sports dresses, all the same size and pattern. My lofts were loaded with them. Nine tenths of them will melt away before I dispose of them.

But she won't try it again,' he added. Too hard on her health.'

How?' I inquired.

Well, she lost ten pounds doing that one stunt. She's not hardy enough for magic. What she really needs is to go out to Arizona and lie around in the sun for a year. I wish to the Lord I had the money. I'd send her.'

I c.o.c.ked an eyebrow at him. Getting interested, Joe?' Jedson is an inveterate bachelor, but it pleases me to pretend otherwise. He generally plays up, but this time he was downright surly. It showed the abnormal state of nerves he was in.

Oh, for cripes' sake, Archie! Excuse me, Mrs Jennings! But can't I take a normal humane interest in a person without you seeing an ulterior motive in it?'

Sorry.'

That's all right.' He grinned. I shouldn't be so touchy. Anyhow, Ellen and I have cooked up an invention between us that might be a solution for all of us.

I'd been intending to show it to all of you just as soon as we had a working model. Look, folks!' He drew what appeared to be a fountain pen Out of a vest pocket and handed it to me.

What is it? A pen?'

No.'

A fever thermometer?'

No. Open it up.'

I unscrewed the cap and found that it contained a miniature parasol. It opened and closed like a real umbrella, and was about three inches across when opened.