Sean's Reckoning Part 3

Sean didn't reply. Instead he glanced across the room. "Hey, Hank," he called to another fireman, who looked to be a year or two older. His craggy features weren't as handsome as Sean's, but there was a confidence about him and an irrepressible grin that would definitely appeal to most women. "How about showing my man Kevin here and his friend Ruby around the station, while Deanna and I talk? We'll catch up with you in a few minutes."

Hank's appreciative gaze swept over Ruby and his eyes lit up. Deanna noted that Ruby looked equally intrigued.

"No problem," Hank said at once, then forced his attention to Kevin. "You really like fire trucks, huh, kid?"

"You bet," Kevin said eagerly.

"Personally, I prefer the men who drive them," Ruby said, regarding Hank with frank appreciation.

Deanna took note of his broad shoulders, dark-brown eyes and only a dark shadow of hair on his shaved head. He was definitely Ruby's type-unrepentantly male.

He grinned at Ruby. "Is that so?"

Deanna shook her head as the three of them left. "Your friend is a brave man. Ruby's a wonderful friend, but she's fickle. She has a habit of discarding men like tissues when they don't live up to her ideals, and they seldom do."

Sean chuckled. "Then I think they were made for each other. Hank is a notorious flirt."

Deanna shot a look at him. "He's not married, is he?"

Sean looked hurt by the question. "Of course not. What kind of guy do you think I am? And even if he were, what's the harm in asking him to show Ruby and Kevin around the station? I didn't set them up on a date."

"Sorry," she said at once. "I overreacted. It's just that Ruby's a lot more vulnerable than she looks. Most men miss that."

Sean stared after them, his expression thoughtful. "Yeah, I imagine they do. She looks as if she could handle anything that comes along."

"When her guard's up she can," Deanna agreed.

"But she lets it down too often and too quickly?" he guessed, surprising Deanna with his insight.

"Exactly."

Sean turned back to her. "I doubt anything much can happen between her and Hank with Kevin along as a chaperon."

Deanna nodded. "You're probably right. Why did you make such a point of getting rid of them, by the way?"

"Like I said, I wanted to talk to you about the money thing." He held out the envelope. "I want you to take this back."

Deanna's hackles immediately rose. "Not a chance. And there is no 'money thing,"' she responded edgily. "You made a loan, which was extremely generous of you, by the way. I'm paying you back. It's a business matter."

"It's not as if we signed loan papers and there's some huge penalty if you miss a payment," he retorted. "It was a hundred bucks, not a thousand. I wish it could have been more. After the fire destroyed everything you owned, I thought a few extra dollars might help you get back on your feet, buy a few essentials. I certainly didn't need it back right away."

"Maybe in your world a hundred dollars doesn't amount to much, but it was a lifeline for me."

"That's exactly my point. You need it right now. I don't. It's certainly not worth working yourself into exhaustion to pay me back."

Deanna groaned. Now she understood why he'd gone all worried and protective on her. "Ruby's been blabbing, hasn't she? Did she tell you I was working too much?"

"She mentioned two jobs and extra hours on top of that," he admitted. "That's crazy."

"It's not crazy if I want to start over and get out of her apartment."

"Is she complaining?"

"No, of course not."

"Well then, what's the rush?"

"It's a matter of principle."

"Is the principle worth more than your son's happiness?"

Deanna stared at his suddenly harsh expression. "What kind of question is that?" she demanded heatedly. "Nothing is more important to me than Kevin's happiness and well-being. And what right do you have to question that? You don't even know me." is more important to me than Kevin's happiness and well-being. And what right do you have to question that? You don't even know me."

Despite her sharp response, he didn't back down. "Maybe not, but I can see what's staring me right in the face. Kevin needs his mom, not an extra few bucks for groceries."

"Maybe if you'd gone hungry you'd feel differently," she snapped.

"I have," he said bluntly. His unflinching gaze clashed with hers. "And I've gone without a mother. I'm here to tell you that there's no comparison. I would have gone hungry every night of my life, if it had meant seeing my mother again."

Deanna felt as if he'd landed a punch squarely in her gut. Even without details, that revelation explained a lot. No wonder he was taking her situation so personally.

"I'm sorry," she said at once, shaken by the raw pain in his voice. "What happened? Did she die?"

"No," he said tightly. "She and my dad walked out on me and my brothers. My brother Ryan was eight. I was six. And Mikey was four. As far as I know, they took the twins, who were only two, with them. We never saw them again."

"Oh, G.o.d, how awful," she whispered, trying to imagine a six-year-old having his entire family torn apart. What could possibly have driven his parents to do such an awful thing? Hadn't they understood the permanent emotional scars likely to be inflicted on the boys they'd left behind?

Even when she'd been at the lowest point in her life, when Kevin had been screaming all through the night with colic, and she hadn't known where their next meal was coming from, Deanna had never once considered walking away from him. He was the reason she'd had for going on. She wouldn't have allowed anything to split them up.

She started to reach out to touch the clenched muscle in Sean's arm, but after one look at his shuttered gaze, she drew back before she could make contact. "I really am sorry."

"I don't need your pity. I only told you that so you'd realize that I know what I'm talking about. Don't shortchange your kid on what really matters." He shoved the envelope back at her. "Keep the money until you really do have it to spare."

Years of stubborn pride told her to refuse to take it, but the look of despair in Sean's eyes made her relent. She put the envelope back in her purse. At the same time, it took every bit of restraint Deanna possessed not to reach out and hug the man standing beside her. He looked as lost and vulnerable as if his mother had walked out days, rather than years, ago.

"Just so you understand that Kevin's situation is not the same as yours. I'm not abandoning him," she said softly. "I would never in a million years walk out on my son."

"If he hardly ever sees you, it's the same thing," Sean insisted, clearly still drawing comparisons with his own background.

"I love my son."

"I'm sure you do. I even believe my mother loved me. That doesn't change the fact that she was gone." He regarded her with sudden urgency. "Please think about what I'm saying. I was only a year older than Kevin when my folks walked out. It's not something a kid ever gets over."

"I'll keep it in mind," she promised. "And I'm not just saying that. I really will."

Sean's intense gaze held hers. Finally he gave a nod of satisfaction. "That's good, then." But, as if he feared he'd given away too much, his expression suddenly went blank. "We should probably try to catch up with Hank. I imagine he's wondering what happened to us."

Deanna laughed at that. "I doubt he or Ruby even realize we're missing."

Sean's lips twitched, and then a slow grin spread across his face. In that instant the last of the tension between them was finally broken. "All the more reason to catch up with them," he said. "They're liable to forget that they have an impressionable kid tagging along."

"Does Kevin strike you as a boy who allows himself to be ignored for long?" she asked. "He's probably boring Hank to tears with a million and one questions about being a fireman. Ever since the day of the fire, it's all he's talked about. If he could sign up now, he would."

No sooner had the words left her mouth than the siren on one of the engines split the air with its loud wail.

"A call?" Deanna asked worriedly, glancing around for signs of men rushing to pile onto the trucks.

"Nope. I think Hank just showed Kevin how to turn on the siren," he said, leading the way to the truck in the next bay.

Instead of Kevin in the driver's seat, though, it was Ruby. Kevin was sitting next to her, giggling.

"Told you that would get them over here," he said, pointing to his mother and Sean as they approached. "Can I do it now?"

Hank turned and winked at them, then returned his gaze to Ruby. "If Ruby's willing to give you a turn, go for it, kid."

Ruby didn't budge. "I don't know. I kind of like it up here. I understand why you guys get off on this kind of thing."

"It's not driving the truck that does it," Hank explained patiently.

Ruby regarded him doubtfully. "So you don't get some macho kick out of making all that noise and tearing through the streets?"

"I never said that. But we make noise and tear through the streets to get to the fire faster," Hank said. "It's not some macho game. We're trying to save lives and property."

Ruby nodded solemnly. "Then it's the danger? You like putting your life on the line?"

"It's not as if we deliberately risk our lives for the fun of it," he retorted, his genial expression suddenly fading.

"No, for the thrill of it," Ruby corrected.

Hank regarded her with obvious exasperation. "It's about doing a job. If we do it right, there's only a tiny, carefully calculated risk involved."

Ruby grinned. "Then all those medals for bravery I heard about inside, you didn't really deserve those?"

"Oh, brother," Sean muttered. He turned to Deanna. "Want to grab Kevin and go out for a soda or something? My shift's over, and I have a hunch those two will be arguing about this for a while. Ruby's pushing all of Hank's b.u.t.tons. His wife left him because she thought he was a danger junkie."

"Ouch," Deanna said. "Maybe I ought to warn her."

Sean shook his head. "Don't. His ex was right, and so is Ruby. He needs reminding occasionally." He met her gaze. "So, how about that soda?"

Deanna knew the smart thing would be to refuse, but she couldn't seem to make herself say the words. She simply nodded, then added, "But you're not going to get Kevin away from here till he gets to turn on that siren."

"Good point." Sean climbed up on the opposite side of the truck, whispered something to Kevin, then helped him to reach the b.u.t.ton to turn on the siren. Ruby looked vaguely startled, but she never tore her gaze away from Hank. He looked equally captivated, despite his apparent frustration at the turn their conversation had taken.

"We're leaving now," Deanna announced.

"Whatever," Ruby said.

"I'll get Ruby home," Hank said absently.

"I'm perfectly capable of getting home on my own," Ruby shot back. "I walked over here, didn't I?"

Hank shot a bewildered glance toward Sean. "Was that offer an insult? I thought I was being a gentleman."

"Don't ask me," Sean said. "Everyone knows I don't understand women. You're the expert."

"Hah!" Ruby muttered.

"I heard that," Hank said.

"I meant for you to hear it."

Sean chuckled. "Okay, children, play nice. The grown-ups are leaving now."

He scooped Kevin up and settled him on his shoulders, then beckoned to Deanna. "Let's get out of here before we get caught in the crossfire."

"I don't get it," Kevin said. "Ruby really, really likes guys. How come she's been fighting with Hank the whole time we've been here? She hardly even knows him."

"Sometimes people just don't hit it off," Deanna said.

"Then how come she's staying here instead of coming with us?" Kevin asked, his expression puzzled.

"He's got you there," Sean said, amus.e.m.e.nt sparkling in his eyes.

Deanna frowned at his obvious reference to the sizzling s.e.xual chemistry between their friends. "I don't think there's an explanation that's suitable for a five-year-old, do you?"

"How come?" Kevin asked.

"You'll understand when you're older," Sean told him, winking at Deanna.

"But I need to know now," Kevin persisted. "My teacher says you gotta ask questions if you're gonna learn stuff."

"Hard to argue with a teacher," Sean agreed. "Deanna? Care to give it a shot?"

She frowned at him. "Ruby is staying because she wants to," she told Kevin, hoping it was the kind of simple explanation that even a five-year-old could grasp and accept.

"But why?" Kevin glanced back toward Ruby. "Look. They're still arguing. What fun is that?"

"Some people think a lively argument is stimulating," Sean said. It was apparent that he was barely holding back a laugh.

Deanna regarded him with exasperation. He was clearly enjoying her discomfort with the entire topic. "Care to find out if we're among them?" she asked testily.

He did laugh at that. "Nope. I'm a nonconfrontational kind of guy."

Kevin peered quizzically at both of them. "I still don't get it," he said, sounding disgusted. His expression brightened when they reached a drugstore with an old-fashioned soda fountain inside. "Can I have a chocolate milkshake?"

Deanna would have let him have anything he wanted if it would take his mind off the byplay between Hank and Ruby that had evidently been building to some sort of s.e.xual crescendo all evening long.

"A milkshake's fine," she said.