Sasami-san @ Ganbaranai Vol 1 Chapter 10

VOLUME 1

Chapter 10: Welcome to Takamagahara

The “main display,” a display that was similar to those you could find in normal SNS programs, was now showing on everyone’s screens.

“Hm, I see I see.”

I had no idea how my brother could see in front of him with his eyes covered like that, but he seemed to be convinced about something.

On this screen you could write a blog, message your friends, manage a forum, make a community… most of the communication functions could be found here (of course, you could access this screen from anywhere in the game).

It was also a bit like the menus you would find in normal RPGs… on the display, you could change your character’s appearance and equipment. There were also minigames that begged for people to try and break the top score, and there were plenty of people who never even played the game and just stayed on this main display.

“Anyways, we spent all this time making our characters. So let’s play and see what this is all about!”

Tsurugi sounded excited and began to manipulate her controller by herself.

“And then we login… alright.”

Tsurugi quickly found the “Head Towards School” b.u.t.ton on the screen and was the first to login.

Afterwards, everyone else followed her example and did the same.

The screen changed, and after a short loading time…

“Ohhhhh…”

My brother sounded pretty impressed.

On the screen was a town that clearly belonged in a fantasy game, even though for some reason it also felt somewhat traditional j.a.panese.

The castle town of Takamagahara Academy stretched out on the screen, lined with houses that looked made out of hardened earth (it seemed that since the demon king had attacked, the academy was turned into a castle, and so the town surrounding it was called the castle town).

When you first logged in, you were plopped in some random place in the town.

Almost all the other people being shown on the screen seemed to either be human players or characters who had graduated and become NPCs, since they had HP and SP values and bars showing above their heads.

Swordsmen wearing Western suits of armor, brave-looking werewolves, half-bird half-humans with wings sprouting from their backs… there were some really ridiculous characters walking around.

By the way, my brother was…

“This is me…?”

His voice shivered, almost like he had found some new sense of pleasure, and he was getting strange looks from the people around him.

Your character’s appearance changed based on your equipment.

For some reason, my brother had received no equipment from Makina-san, and was just wonderfully and completely naked.

His character on screen was also crudely based off the photo of him in real life, so he looked extremely sketchy.

Another player couldn’t help but stop at the sight of him. “Umm… I’m not sure why you look like that, but here.” He handed my brother an “old rag.”

Geez, it wasn’t a few seconds into the game and my brother was already a charity case.

My brother equipped the “old rag” and began wandering around (it’s not like he was any less exposed like this, but at least he could walk around now without getting arrested).

“These games are pretty amazing. It’s so realistic. The only games I’ve played are the ones where blocks just fall endlessly from top to bottom…”

“Games like this are pretty common these days.”

But even so, Tsurugi seemed to be having fun as she played the game while lying rudely sprawled on the floor.

Tsurugi was the one who loved games, so she seemed to quickly adapt and take a leadership role.

“Let’s meet up first. Looks like the entrance ceremony is going to take place in the ‘Auditorium’ in the ‘Academy.’ We have to go to that first. It’d be pointless if we try to do things separately, so let’s go to that ‘auditorium’ and… I think there’s a bronze statue in front of it, so let’s all meet there.”

“Roger.”

“How do you move…?”

Kagami responded calmly, but beside her Tama was quickly clicking the mouse.

“Ah, you do it like this. Tama knows now. And this is talk… and Tama can check her items with this b.u.t.ton…”

As expected from an elementary schooler; she didn’t know much but learned quickly.

The one I was most worried about was my brother, but the people around him seemed concerned at his suspicious appearance and spoke up to him. “Umm, I’m not sure if you got attacked by bandits or something, but… are you alright?” they would say. My brother fearlessly asked those people for directions and was guided to the auditorium.

Unlike me, my brother had good communication skills.

It made me jealous.

“But it really feels like we’re walking through a fantasy world, doesn’t it?”

There were a few boring moments when everyone was moving to the meeting spot, so people began to chat.

“Well, no matter how pretty things are… I still prefer reality.”

“The minute you say that it’s all over.”

Tsurugi gave a dry smile at her sister’s opinion.

“But you know, isn’t it boring to only be able to play in ‘reality’? I like games. It makes me feel like I’m taking a trip through a dream world someone else created.”

“You can get that from novels too… well, I guess that only in games can you control a character as an extension of yourself. I feel this can be dangerous, but this kind of empathy, this kind of ‘division of self’ is… ah, look, I arrived.”

“Tama is also in front of the auditorium! Kagami-nee, where are you?”

The school grounds were pretty s.p.a.cious, but it was jam packed with students.

There had been so many new users lately, and the academy grounds were areas that anybody could use, so too many people would gather there and the lag and general slowdowns that this caused was now a major problem in Yamata no Orochi SNS.

But perhaps the Yagami Sisters had done something; that rage-inducing phenomenon didn’t occur this time, and the characters smoothly moved across the screens.

They were in the school plaza.

Right next to the obvious “auditorium” building painted in white.

For some reason, there was also a bronze statue of Saigou Takamori (1) and his pet dog next to the building. My brother finally reached that statue.

My brother expressed his grat.i.tude towards the kind people who led him here. It looked like even in games, my brother was destined to bow his head to people forever and ever.

“Sorry to keep you waiting, Kagami-san. Tama-san.”

Tama: y*#haioej

“Tama? What’s wrong? Did you finally lose it?”

“Talking to everyone like this is not too video-gamey, so Tama is trying to make her character talk for her, but Tama doesn’t know really how to use the keyboard…”

“Typing out every sentence is a bother and we don’t have microphones… so can’t we just talk orally with each other?”

Tama: Oooooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Tama didn’t seem to be happy with that and she let out a strange sound for a while.

Their characters’ appearances changed a bit based on their starting equipment.

But their characters were still based on real photos, so they looked quite similar to their characters.

Kagami’s character had average height and an average build, but because she was an elf her ears were slightly pointed.

She was wearing the “Nurse Uniform -3” and “Nurse’s Cap -3” she had been given at the start of the game, and she looked exactly like a nurse (although, the thick syringe she was holding was a bit scary-looking and made her look like some sort of serial killer).

As a side note, the minus signs next to the equipment could be improved if you went through certain tests in the school to strengthen your equipment, and could even eventually become plus signs. In other words, if you really liked a piece of equipment, you didn’t have to go out of your way to change it to something stronger but could just focus on building it up.

In Yamata no Orochi SNS, your character’s appearance changed based on your equipment, so that kind of system was put in place (I had also seen fantastically stupid people running around wearing “School Swimsuit + 240.”)

“Ohh, Kagami-san, what a lovely nurse you are.”

“I’m a veterinarian. I have no interest in normal humans.”

“Paparin! Look at Tama too!”

It seemed that Tama had learned to do random things in the game, and her character was now spinning around.

Her character had a bewitchingly nice body that for some reason seemed to fit quite well into the game world. It was as if someone had tried to make a character that looked like the ideal woman.

She was a demon, so her skin color was a bit darker, and she had crimson tattoos around her body that signified her loyalty to the demon king (I know that the demons are supposed to be spies that are infiltrating the school, but try a bit harder to hide that, dammit).

Tama was a pâtissier, but for some reason she was wearing a “Maid Uniform -3.”

That outfit was a rare item she had been given at the start. The fact that these sisters were happening on so many rare items so often was probably because they were divine existences that got special treatment in this world.

Other than her maid outfit, Tama was clutching a kitchen knife in her hand, and she really looked like just a bad dream.

“You two really look quite cute.”

“But walking together with sensei like this is pretty disgusting.”

Kagami looked repulsed at my almost-naked brother.

“So we’re just waiting for Tsurugi-nee then!”

Tama looked all around her, and like a pet dog quickly honed in on her sister’s location.

“Ah! It’s Tsurugi-nee! Hey, over here!!”

“Funyaa. Wait. Something is wrong.”

Tama tried to jump for her sister, but Kagami held her back.

Because a bit away from where those two were standing was…

Tsurugi: I’m telling you to apologize!

Kenji☆: Ugh, give me a break…

Miki☆: Ugh, what’s up with this girl?! She’s so slow! We just b.u.mped into you a bit! Let’s just ignore it and go, Ken-chan!

It looked like Tsurugi was arguing with a pretty boy and girl couple (they probably had tried hard with the character creation tool to make themselves look pretty).

Tsurugi: You didn’t just b.u.mp into me, I definitely took damage there. You trying to screw with me, huhh? I wouldn’t care too much if you just said sorry, but why did you just laugh and try to go off somewhere? You think you two are the heroes and I’m the bad guy? That’s not right, is it? I want to see some remorse. Apologize!

Miki☆: What the h.e.l.l… this girl is annoying. She can’t take a hint. We’re just trying to have fun playing this game! Is this girl a complete idiot…?!

Kenji☆: You want money? I’ll give you money.

Tsurugi received 1000 gold from Kenji☆!

Tsurugi: That’s not it at all, you d.a.m.n rotten eggs. Did I tell you to pay me? Huh? Did I ask you even once for money? I didn’t, did I? I just told you to say sorry! Stop acting like spoiled brats! You think you can get through life by just saying everything is annoying and trying to pay all your problems away, you b.a.s.t.a.r.ds?!

Kagami looked completely at a loss at the strange scene of this midget banchou lecturing this pretty boy/girl couple clad in Western armor.

“N-Neesan is shaking them down… even though she’s kind of a teacher…”

Miki☆: Uwaaah! Kenji told me this would be fun but Kenji is an idiot! I quit! I’m not gonna play these kinds of games anymore! It’s seriously boring and annoying!

Kenji☆: Ugh, g-

Kenji’s words cut off midway and both their characters stopped moving.

The players had abandoned their characters.

Tsurugi: And they still didn’t apologize… their parents should be ashamed, geez.

“I think neesan shouldn’t be talking here…”

Unlike Tsurugi, who was skillfully using her feet to rapidly type out all the words, Kagami seemed to be at her limit just moving her character around, so she just spoke normally.

“These self-absorbed young people might be depressing, but old women who use manners and law as shields to make their points are also pretty annoying, aren’t they?”

Tsurugi: Who the h.e.l.l are you calling an old woman…?

Tsurugi was typing and Kagami was talking out loud, so it looked like Tsurugi was mumbling to herself in the game.

In any case, everyone had met up, so for now the group headed for the auditorium.

Teacher// Kikyou: The entrance ceremony for Takamagahara Academy will start soon!

A teacher in traditional j.a.panese clothing who looked like a samurai was gathering students in front of the auditorium.

Headmaster// Natsumegu: To all our new students, welcome to Takamagahara Academy~~! Myai name is Natsumegu, and I’m the headmyaster!

For some reason, a young girl with cat ears in a long-sleeved kimono was standing on her tippy toes on the microphone stand and speaking with all her strength.

Takamagahara Academy was based in j.a.panese mythology, so almost everything was done in a cla.s.sic j.a.panese style.

The auditorium was also designed to look like a samurai’s home, to the point where the multinational students actually stuck out like sore thumbs.

The sounds of armor clinking filled the air as these apprentice guardians charged with protecting the world from the demon king talked in low voices and listened reverently to the headmaster’s words.

Headmaster// Natsumegu: The demon king might be sealed, but the demons who swear allegiance to him are still working in secret, and monsters are still coming forth from the lands that were polluted by the war with the demon king. You are the proud people who chose to fight against evil in such a world and protect those who are important to you, nyah! Hone your skills in this academy and become people deserving of the t.i.tle “hero”, nyah!

The headmaster gave a carefree smile and her split tails waved from side to side.

Headmaster// Natsumegu: Although, you’re free to not spend every moment studying, but also to find friends and have fun with them over the next three years nyah! The bonds you form, the memories you create, those will eventually become your sharpest weapons, as well as your strongest shields nyah!

The headmaster continued with her believable but perhaps rather pointless speech. She was supposed to be two hundred years old, and lolicons just did terrible things to her in doujinshi (even though I felt we were past the age when everything was fine as long as characters were “technically” above 18…)

My brother and the others were also there in the last row of new students.

They were exchanging information while vaguely listening to the headmaster’s speech.

Tsurugi: Anyways, it looks like we’re all in the same cla.s.s.

The cla.s.s a.s.signments had been announced before the headmaster’s address. My brother and the others had been put in “First Year, Cla.s.s 47” (That sure is a lot of cla.s.ses! But Takamagahara Academy was actually a new academy, so this was in fact on the low side), and their homeroom teacher was “One-Eyed Former Bandit// Kibamaru.” If you were a bandit before, please stop trying to be a teacher now…

“It’s because we preregistered as ‘companions’ before we started the game. The academy is probably being considerate and trying to keep friends from getting separated.”

Kagami gave her response.

“Companions” were like the party members you had in RPGs, or the friends you had in SNS programs.

Once you became “companions” with someone, you would be able to track that person’s location, would be able to talk with that person even over long distances, would have each other’s blogs displayed on your main displays, among other convenient features.

The academy also held having companions in high regard, and made sure to keep friends together in the same cla.s.ses, as well as offering various extra quests and events depending on how many companions you had.

Tsurugi: Although, just listening to some important guy going on and on about things is pretty boring.

“Hearing someone who’s supposed to be a teacher saying that is just a bit…”

Tsurugi: It’s pointless for all of us to stay here listening to this. Kagami, you stay here and listen and tell me later if the headmaster says something important. I’m going over there to explore.

Was she a d.a.m.n child?! She was so restless that I honestly wanted to scream that at her… but Tsurugi secretly slipped out of her row and headed for the exit of the auditorium.

“Ah, neesan… ugh, geez.”

Kagami seemed a bit shocked, but she seemed to decide to listen to the headmaster to the end and didn’t give chase.

With this lineup, if Kagami wasn’t diligent it didn’t seem like anybody else would be…

But what exactly was going to happen if you tried to slip out during the middle of the entrance ceremony? I haven’t ever seen someone try that before, so I didn’t even know… (and from your second time through the game and onwards, you could skip the opening ceremony and the first homeroom if you wanted).

Tsurugi: Ah.

Bzzz. A strange sound effect rang through the air, and right in front of Tsurugi and blocking the exit of the auditorium… a giant appeared.

His body was clad in samurai armor and an outrageously large samurai’s helmet.

He was gripping a rough-looking long sword and steam was being released from his entire body.

The battle theme began to play, and Tsurugi braced herself.

Gate guard// Tsunju: Leaving in the middle of the entrance ceremony is forbidden. If you really still want to go out, then you will have to first defeat me…

Tsurugi: Interesting…

Tsurugi gripped the controller and her eyes sparkled.

Tsurugi: Good timing, you fat b.a.s.t.a.r.d. I was just getting bored too. Hyah!

Tsurugi began to push b.u.t.ton after b.u.t.ton, forcing the door guard into a battle.

Yamata no Orochi SNS had a few battle modes: there was the “Beginner’s Mode,” where you could click on an enemy to attack just like a normal online game, as well as a “Maniac Mode,” where you could enter in complicated commands and fight like you would in a one-on-one fighter.

Naturally, Tsurugi was in Maniac Mode.

She had just started the game so her stats were pretty low, but she evaded her opponent’s huge swings and made precise attacks with her wooden sword.

If she was using Beginner’s Mode, she definitely wouldn’t be able to move so fluidly, and she probably would have been knocked out by now.

Gate guard// Tsunju: Fufu… it looks like there are some quite lively new students this year… interesting. Well then, I won’t go easy anymore! If you can win against me, the special event “Eh? Don’t tell me you’re… the door guard’s secret real face!” will start…!

Tsurugi: Uwah, that’s interesting! I’ll definitely win!

Gate guard// Tsunju: I won’t lose to you… after all, if you see my real face… I’ll have to marry you…!

Tsurugi: Whoa, don’t tell me you’re really a pretty girl?! I’ll definitely win! I’ll capture you!

Tsurugi’s movements sped up.

“Ummm……”

My brother turned his attention away from the entrance ceremony and was now watching the amazing ongoing battle in bewilderment.

“Should we go help? We’re her ‘companions,’ after all.”

“Leave her be. She’s an embarra.s.sment.”

Kagami’s shoulders shook from embarra.s.sment, but then she blinked, seeming to sink into thought.

“But if we do things like that… then we’ll active various events, won’t we? So trying lots of things out might be a better strategy than just going through the game aimlessly. The enemy might be hiding in an event and causing an irregularity from within…”

“Fwaahhhhhhhhhhh…”

Whether Tama understood her sister’s words or not, she gave a slow yawn.

“Tama is also bored… there’s nothing to do, poke poke.”

“Wha-… Tama?”

Inside the screen, Tama had grabbed onto and was pulling on Kagami’s clothes from behind her.

Tama seemed impressed, and held onto Kagami as she twisted her body around.

“Hwawawaaa~~… Tama is touching Kagami-nee! That’s fun… well, what if… Tama pulls with all her strength…?”

Tama received “Nurse’s Uniform -3” from Kagami!

“Funyaaaaaaaaahh?!?!?!”

Kagami let out a rare scream.

On the screen, Kagami had gotten her clothes spectacularly pulled away by Tama, thus finding herself stripped of her nurse’s uniform.

And naturally, she was completely naked underneath.

“W-W-W-What are you doing Tama?!?!”

“Oh, Kagami-nee stripped! That’s funny! It looks like ‘companions’ can take equipment from each other!”

”Special Event// Completely. Naked. a.s.sembly! A Disgraceful Entry Ceremony” has been activated!

“That’s way too special!! Funyaah, why is everyone staring at me?! What?! Why is everyone throwing money at me?! It’s not like I stripped because I wanted money!! Headmaster, do something about this don’t just stand there and throw bundles of coins at me with that smile on your face!!”

And so, the entrance ceremony turned into Kagami’s onstage strip show.

This game’s balance was seriously screwed up…

Once the entrance ceremony ended, my brother and the others moved to the “First Year, Cla.s.s 47” cla.s.sroom.

There were around forty students in each cla.s.s, and each cla.s.s also had its own homeroom teacher.

You often got special events and quests with your cla.s.s and not just with your “companions,” so for the next year (in game time), they would have plenty of opportunities to meet the other players in this cla.s.s.

“Things got so out of hand from the very beginning…”

Kagami had been stripped naked during the entrance ceremony – an event that would probably have traumatized her had it happened in real life – and she sounded a bit depressed.

While the homeroom teacher handed out textbooks and items and explained some of the important points of the cla.s.s, the four of them were sitting in the back and chatting.

Teacher// Kibamaru: First, I want you to all try different things out in preparation for next week’s event, ‘School Event// New Student Apt.i.tude Test.’ And then we’ll test everyone’s abilities, and that will decide what cla.s.ses and events will follow.

The one-eyed middle-aged man wearing animal furs explained these things to the cla.s.s with his back to the blackboard.

Teacher// Kibamaru: First, you should set about getting used to using the various facilities around the school, and doing your best to complete quests given to you by other teachers and students. You’ll also trigger events as you wander around and try things out!

The teacher pa.s.sed maps to everyone.

Teacher// Kibamaru: I’ve pa.s.sed out maps to the beginner’s dungeon, ‘The Silent Forest,’ which is right outside the castle town gates, as well as the dungeon within the academy, ‘Library Labyrinth 1F!’ You should consider going there and leveling up or hunting for items. Every time you clear a dungeon, talk to me and I’ll give you a map to a new dungeon and some small rewards. You can also join the ‘Club Activities’ or ‘School Committee’ communities and trigger various events, or just go and find new companions!

And so on and so forth.

While the homeroom teacher spoke enthusiastically, my brother and the others were having a strategy meeting at their own pace.

“Funyaah. The events around here are just too strange. I don’t know if they’re normal events or some malicious form of an alteration.”

Kagami sighed, but in contrast, Tsurugi seemed quite happy.

Tsurugi: I like this game. I mean, the gate guard wants to meet during lunch… you think it’s alright if I just strip her and jump her right there and then? Or maybe I shouldn’t jump the gun and spend a bit more time earning more affection points…

“Neesan, please stop randomly turning Yamata no Orochi SNS into your own personal eroge.”

This game gave the players so much freedom that if she wanted to jump the gate guard, she probably could… it was just scary how much freedom you had here.

“So what should we do? Right now, it doesn’t seem like any common-sense-defying alterations have happened… so perhaps the G.o.ds have nothing to do with Yamata no Orochi SNS? Maybe the students who aren’t coming to school are just having so much fun with the game that they locked themselves up in their rooms…?”

Tsurugi: It’s still too soon to tell, I think.

Tsurugi’s expression turned serious as she responded.

Tsurugi: Even if this is an alteration, if it’s not one that destroys the world and gets lots of humans involved, it’s best to just leave it alone… It’s just that, this feels different than what I usually feel… even if it’s an alteration, I guess you could say it feels like it doesn’t have the usual sense of purpose…

After a bit of pondering, Tsurugi made her conclusion.

Tsurugi: In any case, let’s concentrate today on playing Yamata no Orochi SNS. If we can’t feel anything strange about it, then we’ll visit each of the missing students’ homes and investigate them one by one.

“Hm, that might be the best course of action…”

Teacher// Kibamaru: Hey you students over there! Don’t talk while the teacher’s talking!

Kibamaru attacks! Kibamaru throws ‘chalk’!

Kamiomi receives 26 damage!

“Why did he hit me?! I wasn’t even talking!!”

Kamiomi has died!

“And I also died?!”

Tsurugi: Why do you only have twenty HP…? I have eighty, and Kagami and Tama have fifty…

Kamiomi’s head was split in two by the chalk and he collapsed on his desk. The homeroom teacher stared at him and shrugged.

Teacher// Kibamaru: Hm, looks like Kamiomi-kun died. Someone take him to the nurse’s office.

Tsurugi: That’s it?! Will he really be okay if we just take him to the nurse’s office?! Also, what kind of homeroom teacher just goes ‘hmm’ when a student is killed?!

“Well, in any case, I don’t think it’s a good idea to just leave him there…”

Kagami picked up my dead brother and headed for the cla.s.sroom door.

“Let’s head for the nurse’s office. That means everyone.”

Tsurugi: Yeah, we should try to stick together as much as possible. Tama, you come too.

“Okaaaay~~!”

Tama stopped scribbling on her desk and followed everyone else out.

Teacher// Kibamaru: There are still things I have to tell you, so after you revive Kamiomi-kun come back to the cla.s.sroom, okay?

You have accepted the quest “Take Your Cla.s.smate to the Nurse’s Office!”

Difficulty: 1/10

Quest Reward: 200 Gold

Tsurugi: We get money for taking a cla.s.smate to the nurse’s office. That’s just a bit…

All kinds of humans and not-quite-humans were walking along the wide pa.s.sageway outside.

Tsurugi took the “School Map (1)” item from her inventory and checked it.

Tsurugi: Looks like the nurse’s office is pretty far away, so let’s head for this magical portal here labeled ‘Shift Portal.’ Seems like if you pay a set amount of gold there, you can teleport to anywhere you want in the school.

“Walking everywhere would definitely be troublesome… and dragging this corpse around with me everywhere is also a bit…”

Kagami nodded, but then suddenly frowned.

“… Hm?”

The background music changed.

The other people walking around Kagami and the others vanished, followed by red flashes and what seemed like an earthquake. After that, the words “ENEMY ATTACK!” appeared boldly on the screen.

“What’s happening…?”

Tsurugi: Looks like some kind of monster’s come. When I was fighting the gate guard this kind of thing happened too.

“We’re in the school grounds, and there are still monsters…?”

Tsurugi was calm, but Kagami seemed bewildered. Tama just paid a worried glance to my brother.

Slowly, a group of people emitting waves of menace appeared before them.

They were people who seemed completely out of place in a cla.s.sical j.a.panese, elegant school…

Take their blonde hair, or their pompadours (2), or their metal bats, or the cigarettes they were smoking, or the unsightly ways they were squatting there… they just seemed too much like old-fashioned…

Delinquent A: You that b.a.s.t.a.r.d new student people are talkin’ bout?

Delinquent B: C’mere a second. We’re gonna teach you how you ain’t in middle school anymore.

“………”

Kagami turned her sleepy gaze in her sister’s direction.

“Looks like you have guests, banchou.”

Tsurugi: And this was supposed to be a sword and magic fantasy school adventure…

 

TRANSLATOR’S NOTES

(1) A famous samurai.

(2) A kind of hairstyle.