Reunited... With Child Part 16

"I think it's a sign of how close we've become that we were on the same page," she said. Her smile was so bright that he almost didn't want to correct her. But he knew he wasn't going to marry her, and she needed to know that.

"Almost the same page, Becca. I'm not talking about marriage. It's not really for me. My dad was trapped in a loveless match with my mother, and I don't want to mess up what we have by making the same mistake as he did."

"What?"

"We both know you heard me. I'm not sure of us, Becca. Few people know this, but my parents married because my mom was pregnant with me. Having me and my brothers didn't make them any happier together. I don't want to repeat my dad's mistakes."

"I'm not sure what you want from me," she said.

"I want you to move into the master bedroom with me and I want us to raise Ty together."

She shook her head. "I don't think that will work for me."

"Why not?"

"I want more kids, Cam. I want Ty to have siblings. Plus your brothers are both married. I don't want to be the only live-in lover. I want to be your wife."

"I'm not going to get married to please you, Becca. I know myself well enough-"

"I don't think you do. I've never met a man more ready for marriage than you. You are just being stubborn because you are afraid to change your personal life."

"I am not."

"You are too. You are so foolish you can't even see that it's already been changed by me and Ty."

"I have already realized that. Why else do you think I offered...it doesn't matter," he said. "I take it your answer is no?"

She shook her head as tears started to roll down her face. "What was the question?"

"Live with me as we have been but move into my bedroom."

"How is this different from being your mistress?"

"We have a son," he said.

"Which is all the more reason I should be your wife, not your mistress. So I guess my answer is is no." no."

"That's it, then. Nothing more to say."

He stood up and walked out of the house. She just watched him leave, knowing that she was out of words. She couldn't talk him into loving her-not two years ago and certainly not now.

Becca watched Cam walk away and tried to keep from sobbing out loud. She tried to tell herself that it was for the best. That they would never have been able to work as a couple. But she couldn't help remembering the flowers he'd sent her. And the sweet way he'd taken Ty with him so she could work.

It was the warmth of her tears on her own cheeks that made her realize that she was crying. She hadn't meant to. She never thought she'd cry over Cam. She hadn't the first time they'd parted.

She wrapped both arms around her waist and sank down on the couch. It was amazing to her that she'd lost Cam in the same way she had before. She'd been searching for someone to be the missing link in her family. And she knew she'd found the right man in Cam. Was it because of Ty and the circ.u.mstances of his birth that Cam couldn't accept that they were meant to be together? She thought Cam had forgiven her for keeping the child a secret.

Perhaps it was something he'd never forgive. She tried to equate it with something that Cam had done to her, but could find nothing. Maybe he'd never really be able to forgive her.

She wished she could go back in time and let him know about Ty, but there was no use wishing for a chance to redo the past. That would never happen. She knew she had to move on. But she loved Cam. So walking away from him wasn't an option. Or was it? She was always going to love him and she was going to be in his life as Ty's mom until she died.

If Cam had wanted to make her pay for keeping Ty a secret for eighteen months of his life, he couldn't have designed a better punishment than this. Having to see the man she loved and to know that she couldn't ever have him.

She got to her feet and went into Ty's bedroom. She stood over Ty's bed and remembered seeing Cam do the same thing when he'd realized that Ty was his son.

She tried to make excuses for Cam because she didn't want to spend the rest of her life without him. She hoped he was simply overwhelmed. She'd had nine months, give or take, to get used to the idea of being a mom. He'd had a couple weeks.

Even so, there was no doubt that he was already a great dad. It didn't matter that he was an executive and he had demands at work; Ty came first. She'd seen Cam keep his BlackBerry in his pocket for most of the evening and only checked it once during dinner.

But why couldn't he take the next step and be a great partner to her, too? She wanted to give them both the family they'd never had. To give Ty the parents she and Cam had lacked.

She couldn't believe it, but she still loved him. Even after he'd said hateful things to her, she really just wanted him back here with her. She wanted to feel his strong arms around her.

She was saddened that she wouldn't get to sleep next to him and wake up in the morning with him to Ty's soft calls. She wanted that for both of them, but it wasn't meant to be.

She leaned over the crib and kissed Ty on the top of his head and then retreated to her own bedroom, quietly undressing and changing into her nightgown. It was sleek and s.e.xy, and she'd hoped to have a chance to wear it for Cam. It seemed now that would never happen.

She knew she had to stop thinking about him. And she needed to have a plan. She was going to have to be on her toes tomorrow.

She could stay. But that would make her feel like her soul was slowly dying if she had to spend day in and day out around the man she loved. The man who didn't love her back and was never going to.

She was so sad she started crying again and hugged the spare pillow to her chest as she fell onto the bed. She felt so alone and scared.

She had no one to ask advice from, and every decision she'd made...well, they didn't seem too smart at just this moment. And frankly, she was out of good ideas. She'd used her last one up when she'd decided to tell Cam she loved him.

She wanted to believe that tomorrow everything would be better, but she doubted that it would be. Cam wasn't going to suddenly fall in love with her. She was going to have to figure out a way to share custody with a man who was going to treat her like a stranger-worse than a stranger-every time they saw each other.

She rolled over, hugging the pillow to her stomach and stared at the clock. But no answers came to her. The last time she'd felt this lost and alone she'd called Cam. But she wasn't sure that he'd take her call.

Because it was midnight and because she felt like she had nothing else to lose, she picked up the phone and called him. He didn't answer. It went to his voice mail, and she hung up. She closed her eyes and wished her life were like the romantic tales she loved so much because then happiness and forgiveness would be waiting right around the corner for her and Cam. But she'd been alive long enough to know that dreams really didn't come true.

Twelve.

He wanted to talk to both of his brothers, and though it was late, he knew they'd both be up if he called.

But he also knew that they had women in their lives now. And he didn't want to intrude. But this was big. He had a chance to change the course of his life. The way that Becca had changed her own life when Ty had been born.

A son that Becca had hidden from him. A love that she never did.

He called Nate as he pulled into his driveway.

"This better be a d.a.m.ned emergency," Nate said by way of greeting.

"I don't know what to do," Cam said.

"What? Where are you?"

"In your driveway," Cam said.

"Good, I'll be right down and we'll get Justin on the phone...is it Ty? Is he okay?"

"No, he's fine. I just don't know what to do about Becca," Cam said.

"d.a.m.n," Nate said. The front door opened, and Cam hung up his cell phone as he walked into the house. Nate hugged him close, and right away there was something comforting in having someone on his side.

"Okay, tell me everything from the beginning," Nate said.

"I will, but I want to call Justin, too. I'm going to need an attorney."

"This keeps getting better and better," Nate said, leading the way down the hall to his office.

Cam walked over to the wet bar and poured himself a scotch. He turned and held the bottle up toward Nate. "Yes, please. I'm going to tell Jen that I'll be a while. You can call Justin, okay?"

"Sure. Should I come back another time?" he asked.

"No, definitely not. I'll be less than a minute," Nate said.

He watched his brother run out of the room and poured himself two fingers of scotch, downing the drink, then quickly pouring himself another one. He poured a gla.s.s for Nate, too, and then walked over to the big walnut desk. He'd given the desk to Nate when he'd come back to Miami from playing baseball. Their father had given Cam one just like it when he'd graduated high school.

Cam hit the speaker b.u.t.ton on the desk phone and dialed Justin's number.

The phone was picked up on the second ring. "h.e.l.lo?"

d.a.m.n, it was Selena. "It's Cam. I'm sorry to call you so late. Can I speak to Justin?"

"Yes, just a minute," she said.

"What's the matter? Is Nate okay?" Justin said as soon as he came on the line.

Cam wondered if he shouldn't have waited until tomorrow to do this. But he'd known he needed to talk tonight, and this was a family matter.

Nate came back in the room wearing a dark navy robe. "Cam's got problems with Becca."

"What the h.e.l.l?" Justin asked.

Nate sat down in one of the leather armchairs near the wall, and Cam stayed where he was, reclining against the desk. "Do you want the entire story?"

"No, I think I know what I need to know," Justin said, the bitterness in his voice coming loud and clear through the speaker. "The bottom line is, Ty is eighteen months old. What are you going to do? Are we suing for custody and taking the kid from her?"

Though part of Cam wanted to say yes, he knew he wouldn't be able to do that to Becca or Ty. And suddenly he had his own answer. He didn't need to be waking his brothers up in the middle of the night to try to figure out what to do next. He only doubted himself because he'd never had a good relationship except with these two and his dad.

"She's a good mom."

"I agree," Nate said. "But if you don't get along with her, you're going to have to take action."

The only action Cam wanted to take was to smash his fist through a wall. All because he couldn't admit to himself that he wanted to build a life with Becca. One that would include a cute little son named Ty. But now those dreams were dashed and he had to start over from scratch. Or did he? Because to be fair, he couldn't see a future with Ty without Becca.

Not without her.

"I don't know what to do. This is the first time in my adult life that I'm unsure what the next step is and I'm scared."

"Well, you're not alone and neither is Ty. We are going to figure it out and rally together. That's what the Stern brothers do best," Nate said.

Cam was grateful for his brothers, but he knew it wasn't going to be as easy to pick up the pieces as they made it seem.

"Do you think that Dad had it wrong when he said that Stern men weren't made for monogamy?" Cam asked.

"Yes," Nate said. "I was definitely made to be Jen's husband. I think Dad picked the wrong woman to tie his life to."

"Jus?" Cam asked.

"I agree with Nate. Dad was a great father but he didn't try to be the partner to Mom that I am to Selena. And that you are to Becca."

"How do you know?" Cam asked. "You didn't seem too fond of her."

"Selena pointed out that Becca was living with you and not angry at you at all. Do you know what kind of love she must have for you to do that?" Justin said.

"I do," Cam admitted. "I'm afraid to love her."

Nate started laughing.

"What?"

"You already love her. You just don't want her to know. You're not fooling anyone else."

"True that," Justin said. "You don't want to sue her, you want to live with her and Ty and are afraid to marry her. That tells me you don't need an attorney, you need to decide for yourself if you are going to keep hiding from life or grab it by the b.a.l.l.s... My money's on you grabbing it."

"Mine, too," Nate said. "You have never been someone to stand on the sidelines."

His brothers had a point, and Cam knew he had already made up his mind. "Good night, boys. Sorry for the late night."

"It's all right. That's what family is for," Nate said.

"Just don't make a habit of this," Justin said, before hanging up.

Cam left Nate's house ten minutes later and drove back to his home.

In the corner of his bedroom propped against the wall was the Chagall print that he'd bought for Becca. Looking at it made his heart ache. He wanted to be that man in the picture holding on to the woman. And he wanted that woman to be Becca.

He took his cell phone out of his pocket and saw he'd missed a call from her but she hadn't left a message.

What would she say to the man who'd broken her heart? He loved that woman. It didn't matter what had happened and that she'd lied to him, he needed to have her in his life.