Real Life In London Part 94

By this time they had reached the Cafe Royale, and upon entrance were ushered by a man in blue livery, with gold laced tr.i.m.m.i.n.gs, into an apartment far exceeding in splendour any thing that their previous conversation had led them to expect. The walls, formed of looking gla.s.s and rich tapestry, and ornamented in a fanciful manner, reflected their persons as they pa.s.sed along at every point; while the choicest flowers and shrubs, with which they were surrounded, sent forth a delightful fragrance, and gave some distant idea of Eastern luxuries.

"Here," said the Hon. Tom Dashall, "is elegance at least; and if the accommodations are found to be equally good, it can be of little consequence to us whether the place itself have an English or a foreign name."

"I confess," replied Sparkle, "that I still conceive, that as a place of resort appropriated to the upper ranks of natives and foreigners, magnificent in its decorations, superior in its accommodations, and conducted with skill and liberality, to become truly national and deserving of support, it should be honoured with an English t.i.tle."

"And that it certainly is," continued Dashall, "not only one but many, for n.o.bility is frequently to be found within its walls; nay, a proof of it appears at this moment, for there is Lord P------ and Lord C------ now entering; but come, let us try the coffee, catch a view of the papers, and proceed."

~~286~~~ They had now seated themselves near an elderly gentleman, who seemed to be in deep contemplation, occasionally rubbing his hands with apparent gratification, and shaking his head with importance, while he glanced over a newspaper which lay before him.

"I should judge," said Tallyho, "he is a member of parliament, probably conning over the report of his last night's speech in the House."

"Or probably," said Dashall, "an author in search of ideas for his next publication, wherein he intends to cut up the ministers and their measures."

"Yes," continued Sparkle, "or a quack doctor, examining if the editor has given insertion to his new flaming advertis.e.m.e.nt, wherein he promises to perform what is utterly impossible to be accomplished."

"I wonder if he can speak," said Tom, laying clown the paper; "I'll try him.--A fine morning, Sir."

As this was directed immediately to meet the old gentleman's ear, he looked up for the first time since they had entered.

"Beautiful, Sir," was the reply--and here the conversation ceased again.

"Excellent coffee," said Sparkle,--"is there any news to-day, Sir?"

endeavouring to rouse him again.

"There is always news, Sir," was the reply, taking a plentiful supply of snuff.

"Of one sort or other," continued Bon.

"Why yes, have we not every day a quant.i.ty of newspapers that make their appearance with the sun?"

"Truly," replied Sparkle; "but you could hardly misunderstand me--I alluded to something out of the common run of events; such, for instance, as relates to the interests of the nation, the agricultural distress, the distress of the Irish, the state of the American independents, the proceedings of the Spanish cortes, and the French chamber; the movements of the Greeks, the operations of Turkey and Russia, or the--or--"

"Why, Sir, your inquiries are very rational; and as I perceive you have a desire for intelligence, and I have at all times a desire to impart such as I am in possession of for the benefit of others, the newspapers have abundance of information; but I must say the editors, though men of education and intelligence, are not always well informed: besides, Sir, there is no reliance on their a.s.sertions; many valuable and important secrets are in the hands of individuals, which never find their way into the public journals."

~~288~~~ Having proceeded thus far, our three friends were all anxiety to continue what now a.s.sumed the appearance of an interesting conversation.

"The nation is gull'd by misrepresentation, from the high to the low one system is acted upon; but I have a doc.u.ment in my pocket which came into my possession in rather an extraordinary manner, and is as extraordinary in its contents; it was thrust into my hand on my way here by a stranger, who instantly disappeared."

"A curious salute," observed Tom; "probably some state paper, some information on foreign affairs, or a pet.i.tion to be presented to the House."

"The fact is, Sir, as I had no conversation with the stranger, I was ignorant of the importance of the doc.u.ment; but upon opening it, judge of my astonishment, when I found it concerned a Prince well known to the British nation, whose interests depend on its support."

"O ho," said Sparkle, "then perhaps it is of a delicate nature, and more attaching to private circ.u.mstances than public affairs."

"You shall hear, Sir.--It was an appeal to myself, amongst others, in which Russia was stated to be in such connection with Greece, that the heads of this kingdom could not but be conscious of the important results; results, Sir, that were enough to make one's hair stand on end; indeed, I have never been able to dismiss the subject from my mind since I first cast my eye over the information."

"Zounds, then," cried Dashall, "there is much to be apprehended."

"It is impossible for me," continued the old gentleman, "to say how far the distinguished person to whom I have alluded has already, or may hereafter succeed in the objects he has in view; but this I think certain, that if he can but interest the Poles on his side, his affairs must thrive."

The Hon. Tom Dashall by this time was puzzled with the lengthened introduction this gentleman was giving; he sipped his coffee--looked grave--smiled, took up the paper--pretended to read--then laid it down again.

~~288~~~ Sparkle looked wise, and betrayed his anxiety by moving closer to the communicant. Tallyho fixed his eyes on the old gentleman, with an apparent desire to count the words he uttered.

"In the meantime," continued the interesting stranger, "he is so indefatigable in diffusing through all ranks of society, by means of the press and private agents, a knowledge of the power he has of smoothing the way to success, that the crown ought to receive his proffered aid for its own benefit."

"Then," said Sparkle, "it really is a doc.u.ment of public importance: if not too great a favour, might we be allowed a sight of the------"

"The doc.u.ment,--Oh certainly, Sir," said he, hastily rising and drawing a printed paper from his pocket; "I will leave it with you:" then throwing it on the table, he made a precipitate retreat.

The little care which the old gentleman seemed to take of this sc.r.a.p of importance, struck them all with wonder.

"A rum old codger," said Tom; "and I recommend his observations, as well as the produce of his pocket, to the serious consideration of our friend Sparkle, who will perhaps read this paper for the benefit of us all."

Sparkle, who by this time had unfolded this mysterious paper, burst into a hearty laugh; and as soon as he could command his risibility, he read as follows:

"PRINCE'S RUSSIA OIL, For promoting the growth of Hair."

"And Sparkle introduced to Greece," said Tom.--"Well, the old buck has paid you off for your interruption: however, he has certainly proved his own a.s.sertion, that there is no reliance on any body."

"A mountain in labour," continued Tom,--"I think he had you in a line, however."

"I cannot help thinking," replied Sparkle, "that there is a great similarity between him and some of our most popular parliamentary orators, for he has said a great deal to little purpose; but come, let us move on, and lose no more time in the French coffee house, discussing the merits or virtues of Russia oil."

~~289~~~ This proposition being acceded to, our friends now took their way along Pall Mall, where the improvements recently made struck Sparkle with pleasure and delight; the appearance of new and elegant houses occupying the situation of buildings of a shabby and mean exterior, and the introduction of new streets, were subjects of considerable admiration.

"The rapidity of alterations in London," said Sparkle, "are almost inconceivable."

"That remark," replied Tom, "only arises from your late absence from the scene of action; for to us who frequently see their progress, there is but little to excite wonder. Now for my part I am more astonished in present times, when so many complaints are made of distress, that occupiers can be found for them, and also seeing the increase of buildings at every part of the environs of London, where tenants can be found to occupy them."

"I confess," said Tallyho, "that is a subject which I have often thought upon without being able to come to any reasonable conclusion; it appears to me to prove a great increase of population, for although I am aware of the continued influx of new comers from the country, the towns and villages appear as full as ever."

"I am not able to solve the mystery to my own satisfaction," replied Sparkle, "in either case, though I cannot help acknowledging the facts alluded to. It however seems in this place to prove the correctness of the Poet's lines, who says,

"Wherever round this restless world we range, Nothing seems constant saving constant change.

Like some magician waving mystic wand, Improvement metamorphoses the land, Grubs up, pulls down, then plants and builds anew, Till scenes once loved are banished from our view.

The draughtsman with officious eye surveys What capabilities a site displays: How things may be made better for the worse, And much improve--at least the schemer's purse."

Continuing their course along Parliament-street, they soon arrived at Westminster-bridge, when the day proving extremely fine, it was proposed to embrace the opportunity of making an excursion by water. The tide served for London Bridge, and without further ceremony, Tom, Bob, and Sparkle jumped into a wherry, and were quickly gliding along upon the bosom of Old Father Thames. The smiling appearance of the day, and the smooth unruffled surface of the water, excited the most cheerful and enlivening feelings of the mind.

~~290~~~ "Nice weather for the rowing match," said a bluff looking st.u.r.dy built waterman, who had doffed his coat, waistcoat, and cravat, in order to facilitate him in performing his duty.

"Rowing match," inquired Tom. "When does it take place?"

"Why this afternoon at four o'clock, your Honour. Vauxhall will be very full to-night,--Them ere people what's got it now are a getting plenty of company, and they will have a b.u.mper to-night, for the gentlemen what belongs to the funny club gives a funny to be rowed for."

"That's funny enough," exclaimed Sparkle.