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"But it is of course my duty as your guardian to tell you that in my opinion this gentleman is ent.i.tled to your esteem."
After that Mary left him without another word, and taking her hat and cloak as she pa.s.sed through the hall went at once out into the garden. It was a fine autumn morning, almost with a touch of summer in it. We do not know here that special season which across the Atlantic is called the Indian summer,--that last glow of the year's warmth which always brings with it a half melancholy conviction of the year's decay,--which in itself is so delightful, would be so full of delight, were it not for the consciousness which it seems to contain of being the immediate precursor of winter with all its horrors. There is no sufficient constancy with us of the recurrence of such a season, to make any special name needful. But now and again there comes a day, when the winds of the equinox have lulled themselves, and the chill of October rains have left the earth, and the sun gives a genial, luxurious warmth, with no power to scorch, with strength only to comfort. But here, as elsewhere, this luxury is laden with melancholy, because it tells us of decay, and is the harbinger of death. This was such a day, and Mary Bonner, as she hurried into a shrubbery walk, where she could wander unseen, felt both the sadness and the softness of the season. There was a path which ran from the front gate of the villa grounds through shrubs and tall evergreens down to the river, and was continued along the river-bank up through the flower-garden to windows opening from the drawing-room. Here she walked alone for more than an hour, turning as she came to the river in order that she might not be seen from the house.
Mary Bonner, of whose character hitherto but little has been said, was, at any rate, an acute observer. Very soon after her first introduction to Ralph the heir,--Ralph who had for so many years been the intimate friend of the Underwood family,--she perceived something in the manner of that very attractive young man which conveyed to her a feeling that, if she so pleased, she might count him as an admirer of her own. She had heard then, as was natural, much of the brilliance of his prospects, and but little,--as was also natural,--of what he had done to mar them. And she also perceived, or fancied that she perceived, that her cousin Clary gave many of her thoughts to the heir. Now Mary Bonner understood the importance to herself of a prosperous marriage, as well as any girl ever did understand its great significance. She was an orphan, living in fact on the charity of her uncle. And she was aware that having come to her uncle's house when all the weakness and attractions of her childhood were pa.s.sed, she could have no hold on him or his such as would have been hers had she grown to be a woman beneath his roof.
There was a thoughtfulness too about her,--a thoughtfulness which some, perhaps, may call worldliness,--which made it impossible for her not to have her own condition constantly in her mind. In her father's lifetime she had been driven by his thoughtlessness and her own sterner nature to think of these things; and in the few months that had pa.s.sed between her father's death and her acceptance in her uncle's house she had taught herself to regard the world as an arena in which she must fight a battle by her own strength with such weapons as G.o.d had given to her. G.o.d had, indeed, given to her many weapons, but she knew but of one. She did know that G.o.d had made her very beautiful. But she regarded her beauty after an unfeminine fashion,--as a thing of value, but as a chattel of which she could not bring herself to be proud. Might it be possible that she should win for herself by her beauty some position in the world less burdensome, more joyous than that of a governess, and less dependent than that of a daily recipient of her uncle's charity?
She had had lovers in the West Indies,--perhaps a score of them, but they had been nothing to her. Her father's house had been so const.i.tuted that it had been impossible for her to escape the very plainly spoken admiration of captains, lieutenants, and Colonial secretaries. In the West Indies gentlemen do speak so very plainly, on, or without, the smallest encouragement, that ladies accept such speaking much as they do in England the attention of a handkerchief lifted or an offer for a dance. It had all meant nothing to Mary Bonner, who from her earliest years of girlhood had been accustomed to captains, lieutenants, and even to midshipmen. But, through it all, she had grown up with serious thoughts, and something of a conviction that love-making was but an ugly amus.e.m.e.nt. As far as it had been possible she had kept herself aloof from it, and though run after for her beauty, had been unpopular as being a "proud, cold, meaningless minx." When her father died she would speak to no one; and then it had been settled among the captains, lieutenants, and Colonial secretaries that she was a proud, cold, meaningless minx.
And with this character she left the island. Now there came to her, naturally I say, this question;--What lovers might she find in England, and, should she find lovers, how should she deal with them?
There are among us many who tell us that no pure-minded girl should think of finding a lover,--should only deal with him, when he comes, as truth, and circ.u.mstances, and parental control may suggest to her.
If there be girls so pure, it certainly seems that no human being expects to meet them. Such was not the purity of Mary Bonner,--if pure she was. She did think of some coming lover,--did hope that there might be for her some prosperity of life as the consequence of the love of some worthy man whom she, in return, might worship. And then there had come Ralph Newton the heir.
Now to Mary Bonner,--as also to Clarissa Underwood, and to Patience, and to old Mrs. Brownlow, and a great many others, Ralph the heir did not appear in quite those colours which he probably will in the reader's eyes. These ladies, and a great many other ladies and gentlemen who reckoned him among their acquaintance, were not accurately acquainted with his transactions with Messrs. Neefit, Moggs, and Horsball; nor were they thoroughly acquainted with the easy nature of our hero's changing convictions. To Clarissa he certainly was heroic; to Patience he was very dear; to old Mrs.
Brownlow he was almost a demiG.o.d; to Mr. Poojean he was an object of envy. To Mary Bonner, as she first saw him, he was infinitely more fascinating than the captains and lieutenants of West Indian regiments, or than Colonial secretaries generally.
It was during that evening at Mrs. Brownlow's that Mary Bonner resolutely made up her mind that she would be as stiff and cold to Ralph the heir as the nature of their acquaintance would allow. She had seen Clarissa without watching, and, without thinking, she had resolved. Mr. Newton was handsome, well to do, of good address, and clever;--he was also attractive; but he should not be attractive for her. She would not, as her first episode in her English life, rob a cousin of a lover. And so her mind was made up, and no word was spoken to any one. She had no confidences. There was no one in whom she could confide. Indeed, there was no need for confidence. As she left Mrs. Brownlow's house on that evening she slipped her arm through that of Patience, and the happy Clarissa was left to walk home with Ralph the heir,--as the reader may perhaps remember.
Then that other Ralph had come, and she learned in half-p.r.o.nounced ambiguous whispers what was the nature of his position in the world.
She did not know,--at that time her cousins did not know,--how nearly successful were the efforts made to dispossess the heir of his inheritance in order that this other Newton might possess it. But she saw, or thought that she saw, that this was the gallanter man of the two. Then he came again, and then again, and she knew that her own beauty was of avail. She encouraged him not at all. It was not in her nature to give encouragement to a man's advances. It may, perhaps, be said of her that she had no power to do so. What was in her of the graciousness of feminine love, of the leaning, clinging, flattering softness of woman's nature, required some effort to extract, and had never hitherto been extracted. But within her own bosom she told herself that she thought that she could give it, if the asking for it were duly done. Then came the first tidings of his heirship, of his father's success,--and then, close upon the heels of those tidings, this heir's humbly expressed desire to be permitted to woo her. There was all the flutter of triumph in her bosom, as that letter was read to her, and yet there was no sign of it in her voice or in her countenance.
Nor could it have been seen had she been met walking in the shade of that shrubbery. And yet she was full of triumph. Here was the man to whom her heart had seemed to turn almost at first sight, as it had never turned to man before. She had deigned to think of him as of one she could love;--and he loved her. As she paced the walk it was also much to her that this man who was so generous in her eyes should have provided for him so n.o.ble a place in the world. She quite understood what it was to be the wife of such a one as the Squire of Newton.
She had grieved for Clary's sake when she heard that the former heir should be heir no longer,--suspecting Clary's secret. But she could not so grieve as to be insensible of her own joy. And then there was something in the very manner in which the man approached her, which gratified her pride while it touched her heart. About that other Ralph there was a tone of sustained self-applause, which seemed to declare that he had only to claim any woman and to receive her.
There was an old-fashioned mode of wooing of which she had read and dreamed, that implied a homage which she knew that she desired. This homage her Ralph was prepared to pay.
For an hour she paced the walk, not thinking, but enjoying what she knew. There was nothing in it requiring thought. He was to come, and till he should come there was nothing that she need either say or do.
Till he should come she would do nothing and say nothing. Such was her determination when Clarissa's step was heard, and in a moment Clarissa's arm was round her waist. "Mary," she said, "you must come out with me. Come and walk with me. I am going to Mrs. Brownlow's.
You must come."
"To walk there and back?" said Mary, smiling.
"We will return in an omnibus; but you must come. Oh, I have so much to say to you."
CHAPTER x.x.xIII.
"TELL ME AND I'LL TELL YOU."
"Papa has told me all about it," were Clarissa's first words as soon as they were out of the gate on the road to Mrs. Brownlow's.
"All about what, Clary?"
"Oh you know;--or rather it was Patience told me, and then I asked papa. I am so glad."
Mary had as yet hardly had time to think whether the coming of this letter to her uncle would or would not be communicated to her cousins; but had she thought, she would have been almost sure that Sir Thomas would be more discreet. The whole matter was to her so important, so secret, almost so solemn, that she could hardly imagine that it should be discussed among the whole household. And yet she felt a strong longing within herself to be able to talk of it to some one. Of the two cousins Clary was certainly her favourite, and had she been forced to consult any one, she would have consulted Clary.
But an absolute confidence in such a matter with a chosen friend, the more delightful it might appear, was on that very account the more difficult of attainment. It was an occasion for thought, for doubt, and almost for dismay; and now Clary rushed into it as though everything could be settled in a walk from Fulham to Parson's Green!
"It is very good of you to be glad, Clary," said the other,--hardly knowing why she said this, and yet meaning it. If in truth Clary was glad, it was good of her. For this man to whom Clary was alluding had won from her own lover all his inheritance.
"I like him so much. You will let me talk about him; won't you?"
"Oh, yes," said Mary.
"Do; pray do. There are so many reasons why we should tell each other everything." This elicited no promise from Mary. "If I thought that you would care, I would tell you all."
"I care about everything that concerns you, Clary."
"But I didn't bring you out to talk about myself now. I want to tell you how much I like your Ralph Newton."
"But he isn't mine."
"Yes he is;--at any rate, if you like to have him. And of course you will like. Why should you not? He is everything that is nice and good;--and now he is to be the owner of all the property. What I want to tell you is this; I do not begrudge it to you."
Why should Clarissa begrudge or not begrudge the property? Mary understood it all, but nothing had been said ent.i.tling her to speak as though she understood it. "I don't think you would begrudge me anything that you thought good for me," said Mary.
"And I think that Mr. Ralph Newton,--this Mr. Ralph Newton, is very good for you. Nothing could be so good. In the first place would it not be very nice to have you mistress of Newton Priory? Only that shouldn't come properly first."
"And what should come first, Clary?"
"Oh,--of course that you should love him better than anything in the world. And you do,--don't you?"
"It is too sudden to say that yet, Clary."
"But I am sure you will. Don't you feel that you will? Come, Mary, you should tell me something."
"There is so little to tell."
"Then you are afraid of me. I wanted to tell you everything."
"I am not afraid of you. But, remember, it is hardly more than an hour ago since I first heard of Mr. Newton's wishes, and up to that moment nothing was further from my dreams."
"I was sure of it, ever so long ago," said Clarissa.
"Oh, Clary!"
"I was. I told Patience how it was to be. I saw it in his eyes. One does see these things. I knew it would be so; and I told Patience that we three would be three Mrs. Newtons. But that of course was nonsense."
"Nonsense, indeed."
"I mean about Patience."
"And what about yourself, Clary?" Clarissa made no answer, and yet she was burning to tell her own story. She was most anxious to tell her own story, but only on the condition of reciprocal confidence.
The very nature of her story required that the confidence should be reciprocal. "You said that you wanted to tell me everything," said Mary.
"And so I do."
"You know how glad I shall be to hear."
"That is all very well, but,--" And then Clarissa paused.