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Apologies to those waiting with bated breath for these chapters...
Chapter 57 Unsuited
‘I had heard of you, you know. Long ago, even before old Qin asked you to join his company. Another friend mentioned you while we were drinking tea together, your name sounded like “please be more serious”, I was very impressed with your name. He said you were very capable and very special. When Lao Qin told me when he was going to invite you to his company, when he mentioned your name, I realised you were the same person.’
As Zhengqing listened to Guohao, he could not suppress his anxiety. For Guohao not to be direct, but to start talking about the past; it was not a good sign.
Zhengqing did not stop him as he spoke, but used the time to try and calm himself. He more he listened, the more he could understand what Yin Guohao wanted, and therefore, come up with countermeasures.
‘Lao Qin tackled the bull’s horns to lure you to his side, and your performance was beyond expectations. He praised you a lot. After sometime, he told me you had become a deputy general manager at in the head quarters.’
Guohao took a sip of his tea and looked at Zhengqing, who appeared to be calmly listening attentively.
‘You’re the best man to Lao Qin, and he even wanted to make you his successor if you had gotten along with Yu Fei,’ he said. There was short pause, ‘Unlike us, Lao Qin was lucky, he’d found the person who he wanted to pa.s.s on his legacy to. He was luckier than me.’
Zhengqing thought of the families of Qin and Yin, Qin still had his wife but Yin lost his wife. Wen Yi was luckier than Guohao in this aspect.
‘After my wife died, I wanted to let go of everything. Life did not bring, death did not take, so what was the point? Maybe my business got bigger and succeeded, but without my love beside me what was the point? So I sold my businesses, and now I am very happy.’
Although, Zhengqing knew not to speak but he could not help trying to change Guohao’s point of view, ‘But if you hadn’t worked hard at that time, would there have been a business to sell? If you had nothing, and no financial resourses, would you be relaxed and happy now?’
Guohao was stunned at Zhengqing’s words.
Zhengqing sighed at him own impulsiveness, but since the words were out there he might as well say his piece, ‘Uncle, it is a sad thing that Aunt left this world early. My parents also left early, so I can understand. However, you can’t just look at things from one side only. Many people are carefree, no need to work, but they get serious illness. Many people work hard, run about for their three meals, but they live till the age of a hundred. Please do not blame yourself for Yin Ting’s mother’s illness anymore.’
Guohao did not expect Zhengqing to say dare say these things. He looked and Zhengqing, and suddenly barked out in laughter, ‘Xiaoting would has said the same thing to me. She showed me, someone who did not have a hard life but still died of cancer, but someone who smoked and drank all their life lived till a ripe old age of ninety-eight. She told me not to feel guilty about her mother’s death. Though, you have given examples, they examples you give are the extremes.’
Zhengqing was taken aback at that moment,
‘Indeed, there are people who are sick and some of them have no wealth but live long lives, but aren’t these people few and far between? The vast majority of people, who live unhealthy lives, suffer for it. Getting into traffic accidents because they chose to cross the road at the wrong time, because of greed; they cheat and get cheated. These are not the extremes; these are the majority of the populations.’
Zhengqing could not refute. (Zuben: Can I take your place, man? I can refute)
‘But you are right, if my wife and I, in our youth, did not create a good foundation; I would have had no business to sell. No financial resources to live easily.’ Guohao said quietly, he sighed and continued, ‘But I would rather not even have the businesses, I would have preferred the both of us being ordinary 9-5 workers, would rather have no money to cook, would rather…just so she could still be with me.’
Zhengqing remained quiet.
Guohao sipped his tea, and visibly collected himself, ‘Xiaoting looks like her mother, even laughs like her. When her mother died, she took it very hard. She took on the responsibility of looking after her father and taking care of her brother. She was a sensible child who did not complain, and thought hard about doing well for others. She was thoughtful and considerate. When her mother pa.s.sed, she suddenly grew up…’ He said with a sad smile, ‘I have nothing to worry about except for my daughter.’
‘Although, that isn’t fair to Ah Shi, but he is a boy and his nerves are stronger than Xiaoting. Although, Xiaoting seems strong and carefree, she is a sensitive child.’
‘I promise to take care of Xiaoting,’ he said, thinking that was what the discussion was about.
Guohao shook his head the younger man did not understand what he was getting at.
‘There are some things that although we wish for it to go well, in reality we do not have the ability to make it so.’
Zhengqing frowned in puzzlement, was he implying that he and Yin Ting’s love would not last long?
But Guohao continued, ‘When Xiaoting was little, her dream was to be a traveller. I asked why a traveller? She said she wanted to go to many places that people did not have the opportunity to go to, and record it to tell them. At that time, her mother and I smiled. We said, to go to all these places need a lot of money, ah. Mother and Father have to make a lot of money for you do to this. She smiled and said when she grew up, she will also make money.’ (Zuben: Ah… childish dreams. I wanted to be an opera singer and a ballerina and so on and so on)
Zhengqing did not interrupt him. Xiaoting had not become a traveller; was this because her mother died?
‘But her mother left us. Xiaoting did not become a traveller. Though, she is not without money, she would not go, she wants to accompany this strange old man. She often travels with her friends, but her trips are very short, maybe two-three times a year. Instead, she comes with me to the printing factory where no other young girls are. The youngest woman is thirty nine. But Xiaoting gets along with everyone.’
‘She is an angel,’ Zhengqing could not help but say.
‘Yes,’ Guohao nodded and was silent for a while.
‘Last year, or should I say the year before last, I told her to do what she liked. Live the life she wanted, but she said, she wanted just to live happily. I asked if she didn’t want to be a traveller anymore. She said not to worry about it, she did not have to go far to see the beauty of the world. As she grew up she realised that her childhood dreams were too narrow, one does not need to travel far to see beauty, there was was beauty close to one’s home. To have is beautiful. She still has a father and a brother to cherish. She said she was still a traveller, and she is sharing the beauty she has found with you. She did not lose her dream; she works hard everyday for it. She believes she is still a traveller.’
Zhengqing thought of Yin Ting’s blog; the foodie reviews, the weird chicken soup they shared. The pictures roadside flowers, snails, clouds, even coffee…she saw beauty in everything and wanted to share it with everyone. Zhengqing loved her for it and was proud of her.
But Guohao continued, ‘When A-Shi lost money in his business ventures, I knew about it, but he did not come to me because of his pride. He didn’t let me help or give him advice. So I did not bother with him. But Xiaoting took him in hand, and he finally gave up his pipe dreams and opened the bar. It was what he’d always wanted to do but he thought I would not be happy and thought he should do business. Truthfully, I do not care what they do, as long as they are happy. That Xiaoting secretly invested in A-Shi’s business I knew. Now, A-Shi’s business is doing well. Although the schedule is not healthy, he is having a good time.’
Zhengqing’s heart grew heavy. He thought he was beginning to understand what Guohao was getting to; he probably wants to say that his son can do what he wants but his daughter can not. He owes her her dream. But his daughter now has a boyfriend that was not the travelling type, who could not accompany her, therefore, Guohao hoped he could accommodate Yin Ting and do the things she liked to do. (Zuben: heh)
This must be the case, he thought. He was going to put more effort into less overtime. Maybe go on holidays with Yin Ting. Now that he had her, and he hoped to get married, he should adjust his life.
However, Guohao did not give him a chance, ‘Do not say you will change yourself, Zhengqing, such a thing is useless.’
‘You and Yin Ting are clearly different types of people. You lead different lives. I have been observing you these past few days; you don’t like to travel, you don’t like going out, you don’t pay attention to the food you eat, you have no interest in entertainment, don’t like music. You only love work.’ (Zuben: A shame really.)
Zhengqing stiffened. What did he mean? But as he tried to speak, Guohao waved him silent, ‘There is nothing wrong in that. I don’t blame you. Everyone is different. That is normal.’
If it is normal, what was the problem? Zhengqing thought.
‘But I believe that everyone should be with someone similar to them. Someone who views life the same way as them, and that way they could be happy together for a long time.’
‘Xiaoting and I are very happy together.’ Zhengqing said. He deliberately said “he and Yin Ting”, rather than “he was happy with Yin Ting” so that, he hoped, Guohao would understand that the feeling of happiness was not only his, but Xiaoting’s as well. (Zuben: Rein in your temper, Qingqing)
Guohao shook his head, ‘For now, maybe. But in the long run, I don’t think you would.’ He said as he sipped his tea.
‘You have a demanding job with a lot of responsibility, but you find pleasure in that work. It makes you happy. Xiaoting, like me, does not want to be chained to work. Although, she smiles a lot on the outside, in her heart, there is fear. So she is trying to coax you and teach you like a child. Didn’t you take leave of absence to be with her? But isn’t this normal negotiations between two people who are newly in love?’
‘Certainly…’ Zhengqing replied, he wanted to say more but Guohao cut him off and continued.
‘But that is not normal,’ Yin Guohao said, ‘I told you earlier that I was observing you. But it wasn’t from this holiday. You work overtime, regularly. Xiaoting came back home to eat a few evenings, I asked her about you, she said though you had a date, you cancelled your appointment with her. Your knowledge of tea is hard-edged; without nuance. It is obvious you read it from a book. You learnt fishing. Your hiking gear was all new. I know Xiaoting advised you about these things, and I am very touched that you made the effort, but have you ever thought about what you want? What you would like to do? Xiaoting can be overbearing when an idea takes hold. But you are also a strong and a.s.sertive person. Overtime, her nature will bother you. Now both of you are in love, but on your dates, you don’t go out. You’ve never been to a movie together. Now she is not bothered by it, but over time, do you think she would remain happy?’
Zhengqing’s lips thinned into a grim line.
‘You did not do anything wrong, yet you have to blame each other’s position’s in life. Even if you tolerate and do not complain, your heart will acc.u.mulate grievances. You will think that you are doing something good for your relationship. You are leader to hundreds of people, so you must put in a lot of effort to gain the trust of the staff, meet Old Qin’s expectations. But Xiaoting wants to live life, have someone who comes home on time, will happily go with her on holiday, have the occasional romantic entertainment. This is not wrong. This is what most families have.’
Guohao looked directly at Zhengqing and said, ‘You are not suitable, Qiu Zhengqing.’
That single sentence dealt the heaviest blow so far. Zhengqing’s heart pained him hearing that. (Zuben: Never count your chickens before they hatch, m’dear) It was said with such fatherly majesty.
‘You do not suit. You are a good person. Xiaoting is also a good person. But you are not in each others category. If you remain together for a lond time, you are bound to hurt one another. I don’t want your goodness and hard work to be destroyed because of love. You belong in the business world. Xiaoting needs to be free. I have been an albatross on her neck, dragging her so she cannot walk freely, but this is temporary, I will soon join my wife. But I do not want to leave my daughter in the hands of a man who would tie her wings. I do not want my daughter to live your life.’ (Zuben: Melodramatic much)
Anger boiled under the surface threatening to spill. Zhengqing made a great effort to restrain himself. His emotions were in turmoil, unease in his bones. But he knew that reacting this way would not do, he must remain calm. He must attempt a negotiation. He counted to ten, taking deep breaths with each count and then he said, ‘Xiaoting and I love each other. In this world, there is nothing one cannot achieve without hard work. Love is the same. But perhaps in the eyes of her father, no man deserves his daughter.’
‘I am not talking about whether you deserve her or not. It is a question of whether you are suitable for each other. You are not for her and she is not for you. Right now, you get along, you guys think that to love means to make self righteous sacrifice, but over time, the love will melt away leaving grievances, you guys will end up blaming each other and grow mutually resentful of each other. But by then, you will no longer be young and love will not be the only thing that is lost. You will not be able to turn back time. So it is better for me to be the bad guy, and stop you here before you go any further.’
Zhengqing took a deep breath and counted to twenty, before he said, ‘What kind of man do you believe is suitable for Xiaoting? One who doesn’t work, and can accompany her to play, make chicken dumpling soup? A man who can sing, loves to travel, has time and money to squander like Yin Ting?’
‘No’ Guohao said in an even tone, ‘as before your thinking is too extreme. The responsibility you bear is heavy. I would prefer a man who doesn’t have such pressure on him, does not need the challenge of climbing up the career ladder. Someone who has the same interests as Xiaoting; photography, food, travel…there are many professional men who have a good work-life balance. I don’t want my daughter to be with a workaholic. Do you understand?’
Zhengqing did not reply. He was busy trying to calm his head.
But Guohao was not finished, (Zuben: While I agree with a lot of his points, he is too long winded, aish)
‘You and Xiaoting are two extremes. One with an extreme love of work; the pursuit of achievements is tied to your self worth. The other extremely free and playful, and gets happiness from sharing happiness with others. Of course, that is not good either, but this has become a habit of our family and I am selfish, I hope that she remains this carefree and spends lots of time with me. I don’t think you ever took a holiday while you were in university. You hadn’t even gotten your degree before you started working, had you? But Xiaoting, I tell you, had never worked a day seriously in her life. Can you not see the big difference between you?’
Zhengqing finished his meditation and asked, ‘What is the purpose of this discussion then?’
‘I asked you not to tell Xiaoting about this meeting it was not to be kind. I will be speaking about it with her when I get home. I asked you not to tell her because, I don’t want her to interfere so we can talk calmly and rationally. Yin Ting is very emotional, but you are a very logical person. So I thought if I put an a.n.a.lysis before you, you would put aside your feelings and view things logically, and have a good think about what I have said. Perhaps you are already aware of how unsuited you two are, but your emotions are getting in the way of your better judgement therefore you are reluctant to break up. But I will be the bad guy and I have given you a few good reasons. The outcome I want is for you to break up with Xiaoting.’
‘And if not?’
‘I will have to insist.’ Guohao replied calmly but coldly.
Zhengqing leaned back and lifted his gaze to meet Guohao’s directly, ‘Then I am sorry, I would have to insist,’ then he added steel and frost to his tone, ‘that I am not breaking up with Xiaoting.’ (Zuben: Go Qingqing!)
Chapter 58 Suitable
Guohao gave a smile that did not reach his eyes, ‘You should think about your answer more, although I do not care about what you say, but to be kind to you, I want you to be at ease and not create uneccessary stress for yourself.’
Zhengqing gave a smile that mirrored Guohao’s, ‘I finally understand why people have said Uncle is a strong business man, a brother who people still come to for advice. Thank you Uncle, but I do not feel pressured. You are against us being together, I have nothing to bargain with, what pressure do I have? If you had said you were happy to hand your daughter over to me, then I would have felt pressured because I would have tried to live up to your expectations, but now there is little need. You have left no room for us. Therefore, I will calmly and respectfully tell you, I will not give up Xiaoting. I will not break up with her.’
Guohao narrowed his eyes at Zhengqing, but did not show his anger, ‘So do you think the problems I have highlighted do not exist.’
‘They do.’ Zhengqing admitted, ‘When you spoke, you almost convinced me that Xiaoting and I would not work. You are right, Xiaoting and I are completely different, but I have always known this and so had Xiaoting, but we are in love. There will be problems, but we would focus on solving this hypothetical trauma. Why should we hurt ourselves because a situation that is only a possibility? If we all shrink away and run at the sight of danger or hurt, then what hope do we have in life?’
‘But if you know you will come to harm when you jump into fire, why jump?’ Guohao asked.
He was silent for a moment, then asked, ‘Why are you so sure we would jump?’
‘You’re going to keep dating her, aren’t you? The longer you get along, the longer you love, the more complex this relationship gets, the more stress you will put on your psyche. And before you know it, you’re standing between the knives and the fire. One way you will bleed the other way you burn. You haven’t reached that point, isn’t it the best time to withdraw? You will meet a more suitable woman for you, and Xiaoting will meet a man the suits her. Why don’t you give yourselves a chance?’
(Zuben: While as you know I have always felt their approach to their relationship was naïve, Daddykins is also talking in the same extremes as he accused the couple of doing)
Zhengqing did not attempt to reply.
‘Zhengqing, you’re a successful man. You need a woman who would be willing to wait for you at home, a woman who would look after your family while to run your business. You are not able to give up your achievements for a woman, and you have a more successful future ahead of you. Xiaoting should not have to give up her life for a man. As her father, I can only think of her.’
Zhengqing chose to reply, ‘I know you are good to her, and she loves you very much. That is why I am still here. Though you say what you think is the truth, but your truth has preconceptions. You preconception is that Yin Ting and I have our own status quo and our relationship will destroy it, and we will suffer and break each others hearts.’ (Zuben: All very melodramatic)
‘But you feel this premise is irrevocable, and our relationship will end in the demise you a.s.sume.’
‘Wouldn’t it?’ Guohao asked.
‘Who can say? Many channels do not mean a large volume of sales. Few channels do not represent inevitable loss. It may be more costly to sell than destroy. Products and pathways are really important determinants in the success of a business, but marketing is also key. You and I have been talking for almost…’he paused to look at his watch, ‘an hour and half. I have confirmed that I like Xiaoting and decided to date her to the best of my ability. I know we aren’t compatible on paper. I also thought about it when I realised I liked her. I asked myself “Is this right?”, my instinct said “Yes, it’s her.” ‘
‘For me to have taken a step towards her there was a process. It wasn’t something I decided on a spur of the moment, it wasn’t an impulse. If I had changed my mind or was shaken by a one and half hour conversation, would I not be betraying my trust in my instincts?’
Guohao leaned back in his chair and did not reply.
Zhengqing continued ‘Therefore, I cannot give up on Xiaoting because of your a.s.sumptions. It is not fair to me, or to Xiaoting. When I decided to pursue her, I did with marriage as the goal. I want to marry, I don’t want to play love games. Xiaoting was not the type of woman I initially set out to marry. Before I met Xiaoting, I had no concept of love, only cold cut evaluations.’
‘Xiaoting is my first love. I am really lucky to have met someone like her. I am lucky that the woman I want to marry is someone I love, and she loves me too. We are trying our hardest to adapt to each other. But in your opinion, that effort will lead to grief. But I think that, after getting through this hard process, we can find the best way to live and take care of each other’s needs.’
‘That is easy to say.’ Guohao said.
‘Yes, but so is breaking up based on just a few words. It’s all easy to say, one would break up now and there will be a period of heartbreak. It’s easy to say that I will find someone more suitable for me and the next man that Xiaoting meets would be more suitable. It’s also easy to say.’
‘So, what is your point?’ Guohao said with his eyebrows raised.
‘But I will not bid her goodbye because of your advice. You say as time goes by the emotions will become complicated with responsibilities, stress and so on. On the other hand, if there is no sense of responsibility, no pressure, can feelings last a long tine? A relationship is responsibility based on love. An employee who does not have a sense of belonging to the company but just wants to get paid will not last long.’
‘Also, if you break up easily,’ he continued, ‘letting these feelings go and jumping to the next paragraph, the next one would not necessarily be better. It would be impossible for a long time because, you have pinned your hopes on an unknown future and not cherished what you had at the time.’
‘If I can treat the feelings of the person I am with with nonchalance and disrespect, I would treat the next person the same. So I do not believe the solution which you put forward is necessarily good. Naturally, you do not care about me, but is this how you want Xiaoting to be treated?’
But Guohao counter-attacked (Zuben ¬.¬), ‘You say my solution is not good, then what is your solution? Do not tell me you have love, I do not want to repeat my truth. You know what I have said is justified.’
Zhengqing regarded his comment silently for a minute or so, then said, ‘The problems you mention do exist, Xiaoting and I have a lot of adjusting to each other to do…’ he did not know where to go from there. How was a life without grievance possible? But in the end, whether they work out or not depends on their love for each other. Zhengqing shook his head, the older man had made up his mind, there was no way to convinve him otherwise. He will become an obstacle between himself and Yin Ting. But Yin Ting loved her father, without her father’s support and blessings, how would she be happy?
‘I cannot think of anyway to convinve you right now. But it doesn’t matter to you, does it?’
‘No it does not. I have lived a long time and I have watched people in this world,’
Zhengqing said nothing. Yin Guohao believed things would happen as he predicted.
‘I will not break up with Xiaoting,’ he said finally, ‘it would be irresponsible and will be against my wishes. But I thank you for reminding me of the problems that could arise between Yin Ting and I may be bigger than what we feel. I will think it over, and deal with it harmoniously. I hope that one day we can get your approval and blessings.’
Guohao shook his head, ‘You are talking like a business man, how can I be confident?’
‘Whatever I do or say today, will not fill Uncle with confidence.’ Zhengqing replied blandly
Tension filled the s.p.a.ce as the two men stared at each other. Guohao’s expression was sharp and imposing, but Zhengqing did not back down. (Zuben: Staring contest! Very shounen manga)
After what felt like a long while, Guohao nodded and asked, ‘So I can’t persuade you?’
‘No.’
‘Then I will have to persuade Xiaoting.’
‘That is to be expected. I should thank Uncle for his respect.’ Zhengqing said with a smile.
Guohao returned his smile, ‘I may be a stubborn old man, but I am not unreasonable. I said I appreciate you, and that is the truth.’
Zhengqing smiled.
‘But I think you are unsuitable for Xiaoting. I will resolutely object to you being together.’
Zhengqing wanted to laugh, but held back and said, ‘I hope I will be able to prove Uncle wrong.’
‘Will you sacrifice yourself or her?’
Zhengqing did not reply; it was not a matter of sacrifice. He would not be the man Guohao expected him to be. And he would not sacrifice Xiaoting, he didn’t want her to become another person. But if no one sacrifices, how did one accommodate? (Zuben: Compromise?)
The psychological effect of Guohao’s a.n.a.lysis was really a headache.
‘Are you going to speak to Yin Ting tonight?’
‘Yes, I will speak to her when I get home.’
‘Then I should tell you, I will call her and explain what has happened and my stance on the matter.’ He said calmly.
‘I can’t stop you.’
‘If Yin Ting gets emotional, do not be hard on her.’
‘I am her father; I know how to treat my own daughter.’
‘Because you are her father, I don’t think you can remain as cool as you are in a showdown with a stranger.’
Guohao did not say anything, but called for the cheque.
The two walked to the exit. They waited as Guohao’s driver when to bring his car around. They stood in silence deep in thought. When Guohao’s car came up, the older man turned to Zhengqing, ‘You do not understand, this is a checkmate with no solution. I do not think it would be easy for you to accept such a thing over a conversation that lasted an hour and a half. But when you think more about it, you will understand.’
‘I understand,’ he replied lightly, ‘I just don’t agree with your conclusion. I do not believe this a stalemate.’
Guohao moved forward and opened his car door, before he entered, ‘And if Xiaoting agrees with me and wants to break up?’
Zhengqing’s expression grew serious, ‘I will tell her that I do not agree.’
Guohao gave him a final look, then got in his car and drove away.
Zhengqing walked to his car, he got in, took a deep breath and called Yin Ting.
Zuben: What a tedious pair of chapters. Apologies for the typos. I have read through it, but I'm sure there are hidden ones lurking about.
Also, despite my eye rolling, I do enjoy doing this but if someone out there thinks they want to take over the translation, so that the story can be enjoyed without my 'stage whispers', please feel free to let me know.
Index ❋ Chapters 59 and 60