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"No, I think I should love you better. For hitherto I have seen no weakness in you, and it makes me uncomfortable."
"Be comforted! Is it not a weakness to like you!"
"You are free from that weakness, or you would gratify my curiosity."
"Be pleased to state, in plain, intelligible English, what you require of me."
"I want to know, in one word, did you cry or not?"
"Promise to tease me no more then, and I'll tell you."
"I promise."
"You won't despise me?"
"Despise you! of course not."
"Well, then--I don't remember!"
On another occasion they were seated in the dusk, by the side of the ca.n.a.l in the Park, when a little animal began to potter about on an adjacent bank.
Mrs. Woffington contemplated it with curiosity and delight.
"Oh, you pretty creature!" said she. "Now you are a rabbit; at least, I think so."
"No," said Vane, innocently; "that is a rat."
"Ah! ah! ah!" screamed Mrs. Woffington, and pinched his arm. This frightened the rat, who disappeared. She burst out laughing: "There's a fool! The thing did not frighten me, and the name did. Depend upon it, it's true what they say--that off the stage, I am the greatest fool there is. I'll never be so absurd again. Ah! ah! ah! here it is again"
(scream and pinch, as before). "Do take me from this horrid place, where monsters come from the great deep."
And she flounced away, looking daggers askant at the place the rat had vacated in equal terror.
All this was silly, but it pleases us men, and contrast is so charming!
This same fool was brimful of talent--and cunning, too, for that matter.
She played late that night, and Mr. Vane saw the same creature, who dared not stay where she was liable to a distant rat, spring upon the stage as a gay rake, and flash out her rapier, and act valor's king to the life, and seem ready to eat up everybody, King Fear included; and then, after her brilliant sally upon the public, Sir Harry Wildair came and stood beside Mr. Vane. Her bright skin, contrasted with her powdered periwig, became dazzling. She used little rouge, but that little made her eyes two b.a.l.l.s of black lightning. From her high instep to her polished forehead, all was symmetry. Her leg would have been a sculptor's glory; and the curve from her waist to her knee was Hogarth's line itself.
She stood like Mercury new lighted on a heaven-kissing hill. She placed her foot upon the ground, as she might put a hand upon her lover's shoulder. We indent it with our eleven undisguised stone.
Such was Sir Harry Wildair, who stood by Mr. Vane, glittering with diamond buckles, gorgeous with rich satin breeches, velvet coat, ruffles, _pictcae vestis et auri;_ and as she bent her long eye-fringes down on him (he was seated), all her fiery charms gradually softened and quivered down to womanhood.
"The first time I was here," said Vane, "my admiration of you broke out to Mr. Cibber; and what do you think he said?"
"That you praised me, for me to hear you. Did you?"
"Acquit me of such meanness."
"Forgive me. It is just what I should have done, had I been courting an actress."
"I think you have not met many ingenuous spirits, dear friend."
"Not one, my child."
This was a phrase she often applied to him now.
"The old fellow pretended to hear what I said, too; and I am sure you did not--did you?"
"Guess."
"I guess not."
"I am afraid I must plead guilty. An actress's ears are so quick to hear praise, to tell you the truth, I did catch a word or two, and, 'It told, sir--it told.'"
"You alarm me! At this rate, I shall never know what you see, hear or think, by your face."
"When you want to know anything, ask me, and I will tell you; but n.o.body else shall learn anything, nor even you, any other way."
"Did you hear the feeble tribute of praise I was paying you, when you came in?" inquired Vane.
"No. You did not say that my voice had the compa.s.s and variety of nature, and my movements were free and beautiful, while the others when in motion were stilts, and coffee-pots when in repose, did you?"
"Something of the sort, I believe," cried Vane, laughing.
"I melted from one fine statue into another, I restored the Antinous to his true s.e.x.--Goose!--Painters might learn their art from me (in my dressing-room, no doubt), and orators revive at my lips the music of Athens, that quelled mad mobs and princes drunk with victory.--Silly fellow!--Praise was never so sweet to me," murmured she, inclining like a G.o.ddess of love toward him; and he fastened on two velvet lips, that did not shun the sweet attack, but gently parted with a heavenly sigh; while her heaving bosom and yielding frame and swimming eyes confessed her conqueror.
That morning Mr. Vane had been dispirited, and apparently self-discontented; but at night he went home in a state of mental intoxication. His poetic enthusiasm, his love, his vanity, were all gratified at once. And all these, singly, have conquered Prudence and Virtue a million times.
She had confessed to him that she was disposed to risk her happiness on him; she had begged him to submit to a short probation; and she had promised, if her confidence and esteem remained unimpaired at the close of that period--which was not to be an unhappy one--to take advantage of the summer holidays, and cross the water with him, and forget everything in the world with him, but love.
How was it that the very next morning clouds chased one another across his face? Was it that men are happy but while the chase is doubtful?
Was it the letter from Pomander announcing his return, and sneeringly inquiring whether he was still the dupe of Peg Woffington? or was it that same mysterious disquiet which attacked him periodically, and then gave way for a while to pleasure and her golden dreams?
The next day was to be a day of delight. He was to entertain her at his own house; and, to do her honor, he had asked Mr. Cibber, Mr. Quin and other actors, critics, etc.
Our friend, Sir Charles Pomander, had been guilty of two ingenuities: first, he had written three or four letters, full of respectful admiration, to Mrs. Woffington, of whom he spoke slightingly to Vane; second, he had made a disingenuous purchase.
This purchase was Pompey, Mrs. Woffington's little black slave. It is a horrid fact, but Pompey did not love his mistress. He was a little enamored of her, as small boys are apt to be, but, on the whole, a sentiment of hatred slightly predominated in his little black bosom.
It was not without excuse.
This lady was subject to two unpleasant companions--sorrow and bitterness. About twice a week she would cry for two hours; and after this cla.s.s of fit she generally went abroad, and made a round of certain poor or sick _proteges_ she had, and returned smiling and cheerful.
But other twice a week she might be seen to sit upon her chair, contracted into half her size, and looking daggers at the universe in general, the world in particular; and on these occasions, it must be owned, she stayed at home, and sometimes whipped Pompey.
Pompey had not the sense to reflect that he ought to have been whipped every day, or the _esprit de corps_ to be consoled by observing that this sort of thing did his mistress good. What he felt was, that his mistress, who did everything well, whipped him with energy and skill; it did not take ten seconds, but still, in that brief period, Pompey found himself dusted and polished off.
The sacred principle of justice was as strong in Mrs. Woffington as in the rest of her s.e.x; she had not one grain of it. When she was not in her tantrums, the mischievous imp was as sacred from check or remonstrance as a monkey or a lap-dog; and several female servants left the house on his account.
But Nemesis overtook him in the way we have hinted, and it put his little black pipe out.