My Neighbor Raymond Part 51

"There's a bond of sympathy between us, for these bouquets bear a surprising resemblance to those that adorn my bedroom--and for which you once expressed your admiration."

"Yes, that's true; indeed, I remember now that that was what gave me the idea of having some myself."

"And are your flower dealer and mine the same?"

He did not know what to say, and his head disappeared for a moment under the bedclothes.

"Well, neighbor?"

"Oh! I haven't any regular flower dealer; I go sometimes to one, sometimes to another."

"Come, come, Monsieur Raymond, why fence with me; is this the confidence of which you claim to set me an example? Are you afraid of making me angry? Don't be afraid; I ceased to think about little Nicette a long while ago."

At that, he took his whole head out from beneath the bedclothes, and looked at me with a surprised and pleased expression.

"What! do you mean it? you have ceased to think about the little flower girl?"

"I never thought about her!"

"Well! do you know, I almost suspected as much! Besides, we have Madame de Marsan, who must occupy a good deal of our attention!"

"Never mind Madame de Marsan; tell me about your intrigue with Nicette."

"Oh! it isn't a long story! I confess that I am madly in love with her!

You know how pretty she is!"

"A saucy face!"

"The deuce! saucy! you call her saucy! you are hard to please."

"Well?"

"I go to make love to her almost every night. At first she was a little inclined to be wild; but I was so skilful at wheedling her, that now she can't get along without me, and I am sure that she adores me."

"Has she told you so?"

"Almost; besides, those things don't need to be told; they can be seen.

I know women so well!"

"You are more fortunate than I. So you have triumphed?"

"Not altogether as yet; but it won't be long, I am getting ahead very fast. Look you, with women, just be a.s.siduous, persistent, and agreeable, and you can be sure of victory! Oh! I'm a crafty dog, I am, a finished roue! A man must be that, to please the women. Sentiment, sighs, tender words, those were all right once; nowadays, at the first meeting, you inflame; at the second, you toy; at the third, you take a kiss--pinch the knee, squeeze her, and she is yours."

I could not restrain an angry movement.

"And this is the man she loves!" I said, rising abruptly.

Raymond, terrified by my action, had buried himself anew under the bedclothes.

"Do you still have nervous paroxysms?" he cried, without showing his face.

"No, no, I'm all right. Adieu, Monsieur Raymond! be happy; and, above all things, make Nicette happy."

With that, I left him, returned to my own room, and locked the door.

There I could at least give free vent to the pa.s.sions which agitated me, and which I had had the strength to restrain in Raymond's presence. My heart was torn by love, jealousy, anger, and the most profound melancholy in turn. I tried to regain my self-control and to overcome a weakness at which I blushed; then I went out. For a week I courted the distractions of society and abandoned myself to what men call pleasure.

But those things that once attracted me no longer had the slightest charm for me. I went to the theatre, to b.a.l.l.s, concerts, the most brilliant parties; everywhere I was bored and discontented; wherever I went, I carried in the depths of my heart a melancholy, a depression which I could not overcome.

I was always delighted to go home; I was happier there; I sought new suffering in my memories; but that very suffering had a charm for me which I failed to find in society. But if I wished to forget _her_, I must needs leave those lodgings. How could I fail to think of her in that room, on that bed where she had slept! everything there reminded me of her and fed my love for her. I felt that I must go away; that I must leave Paris, where life had become unendurable to me. Distance, change of scene, and time, which, they say, triumphs over everything,--those were the remedies with which I must treat the insane pa.s.sion that held sway in my heart. I would go to see my sister; she had ceased to expect me, but she would be none the less glad to see me; at all events, I should find there people who loved me. It seemed to me that that would do me good. My preparations were soon made. I locked the door of my lodgings, which I retained, although I was resolved never to occupy them again. I forbade Madame Dupont to let anyone enter except herself; she was to take care of them. I paid two quarters' rent in advance, and started for my sister's.

XXVIII

LIFE IN THE PROVINCES

I arrived in due time at the country estate where my sister ordinarily pa.s.sed the whole year. From a distance I saw that the window shutters were closed. Could they be travelling? She surely would have written me.

I rang the bell at the gateway; the gardener admitted me and informed me that Monsieur and Madame Deneterre had gone to Melun for the winter, and that they came into the country on fine Sundays only. As the city was only two or three miles distant, I set out on foot. It was beginning to be dark, but there was a moon. On the way, I tried to imagine what had induced my dear relations to change their mode of life. They used never to leave their country house; but they had been married a number of years, and they probably were beginning to find that they had not so much to say to each other. Then the winter evenings seemed long to them, I supposed, so it occurred to them to try pa.s.sing them in town. That is the way such fine plans for the future always end! Is there anything on earth that is beyond the reach of the effects of time?

I came in sight of the first houses of Melun, a pretty little town, where I used to enjoy myself immensely in the old days; I should surely find it delightful, now that Paris was unendurable to me. This much was certain, that change of scene necessarily causes distraction, and distraction is the very best remedy for pains of the heart and mind.

Besides, I was no Werther; I had no inclination to nourish my love and my sorrow in dense forests, or on the brink of a precipice. On the contrary, I was trying to cure myself; that is the most sensible course; less romantic, it is true, but more in accordance with nature; and I am all for the natural.

I inquired my sister's address. I walked through a part of the town, which would be its Faubourg Saint-Germain, and I soon found the Deneterre mansion. In the provinces a family generally occupies a whole house, whereas in Paris three families often live on the same floor. I confess that it is pleasanter to be alone in your house, to be able to do whatever you choose without fear of annoying your neighbors, to be spared the necessity of meeting repulsive faces, insolent servants, and snarling children on the stairs, to find no marks of a dog or cat on your doormat, when for cleanliness' sake you keep no animals yourself; and lastly, to be able to dismiss your concierge when he is disrespectful, whereas in Paris you must bribe him, no matter how insolent he may be, at the risk of pa.s.sing the night in the street or at the police station, because, in the company of your friends, you have forgotten to keep watch of the time. These are some notable advantages of the provinces over the capital.

My sister uttered a cry of surprise and delight when she saw me; she threw her arms round my neck and kissed me.

"Is it really you, dear Eugene?" she said. "In truth, I didn't expect to see you before next spring. Ah! it's very sweet of you to remember your best friends at last."

I did not tell her that nothing but the desire to avoid Nicette had driven me from Paris; there was no need of that; besides, I preferred to be spared the comments of my dear Amelie, who was something of a gossip, which one is sure to be when one lives in the provinces, where there is not enough to do to keep people from meddling with their neighbors'

affairs.

My sister sent for her husband, who had gone to play billiards with some friends.

"So he no longer pa.s.ses all his evenings at home?" I asked Amelie.

"Oh! my dear, the evenings are very long in winter, and one must do something. In the provinces, gambling is the general rule; one must needs conform to it and do as others do."

"That is true; it is what I have always thought, and what I told you at the time of your marriage, when you were laying out a scheme of life which resembled nothing ever heard of. You told me that I was a heedless, foolish fellow, because I laughed at your plans of seclusion, and of the happiness you were to enjoy in solitude; and now you have abandoned that solitude!"

"Oh! only for the winter; for in winter the country is very dismal; you see n.o.body, you can't walk or drive. Everybody flocks to the town, where they give receptions, play cards, dance sometimes--in short, enjoy themselves. That's why we came. What would you have? we must do as others do."

"Why, it seems perfectly natural to me. At all events, you are happy, aren't you?"

"Yes, my dear, very happy! My husband is the best of men; a little obstinate, to be sure, and not always willing to listen to me when I prove to him that I am right. The result is that we dispute sometimes; but that's nothing!"

"Oh, no! besides, we must do as others do, must we not?"