Mr. Scraggs Part 12

"Well, I fixed him comfortable as I could, and prepared to start.

"'Zeke,' says he, 'don't'--he kinder swallered hard--'don't be no longer'n you kin help,' says he. There come a tear in his eye.

'An' take my respects to Maggy,' says he.

"'Shaw, Pete!' says I. 'Now, don't you go borrowin' no trouble--that's so easy to git without collaterial, it ain't worth the time. I'll be back imejate.' I patted him on the shoulder and he squeezed my hand hard.

"'No man could be a better pardner than you be, Zeke,' says he. 'I ain't a mite afraid of nothin' when that bald head of your'n is in sight, an' you understand a feller--it's a tough play for a rooster that don't come by sand natural.'

"'You got plenty of sand, Pete,' says I, 'all the trouble is, you let it git choked in your hoppers. By-by.' And away I went, slopin' fast, with Pete's forty-eight dollars down in my jeans.

"I was so took up with his affairs I didn't watch out careful, and that ain't wise in a hard-luck country. All of a suddent I hears a v'ice say, 'Puttee hands light uppee!' Sounds like I'd struck a day nursery, but that ain't so, for just before I hears them words there popped out from behind a rock a Chinaman--not, by no means, one of these here little Charlie-boys that does your wash and gives you a ticket with picters of strange insecks painted on it, but a whoopin', smashin' old Tartar pirate, seven foot by three, with mustaches like two tails of a small hoss, and cheekbones you could hang your hat on. More'n that, he was armed and equipped with two hoss-pistols as required by circ.u.mstances.

"That tired feelin' come over me, and I stretched; yessir, the hands of E. G. W. Scraggs went up toward the sky.

"My yaller friend next requested me to produce. Well, now, that was Pete's money. I'd 'a' took a chance at v'ilent physicule exercises, but I see the time had come to talk.

"'My Christian friend and brother,' says I, 'before we converse upon the root of all evil, let me put you on to the fact that my name is E. G. W. Scraggs.'

"'Ah!' says he, backin' up, 'Sclaggsee!'

"'Sclaggsee!' I hollers, and we near met on the spot. 'Don't you say that agin!'

"'Ah!' says he.

"I noticed his guns was wobblin'.

"'Ah!' says I. 'You're darned right. Now, I'll make you this proposition. I got forty-eight dollars in my pocket that don't belong to me. If we let things slide by as if they had not happened I'll give you two dollars for the use of that money until Tuesday next--pay you fifty dollars next Tuesday, at Jimmy Holt's place--get me?'

"'Gettee money now,' says he, cunnin'.

"'_P'raps_,' says I, 'but you won't be in condition to spend it for some time.' He rolled his eye off'n me, and at that instant Mary Ann, the faithfullest gun that ever stood between me and a gentleman whose intentions weren't good, appeared upon the scene.

"'Don'tee shootee, Sclaggsee!' he screeches.

"'You call me "Sclaggsee" oncet more, and I won't leave nothin' of you but a rim,' says I. 'As for the other proposition, it goes--Tuesday next. Jimmy Holt's place, I put you in hand fifty dollars, you c.o.c.k-eyed, yaller, misp.r.o.nouncin' blasphemy on a heathen idol! Although I ain't been near enough to a cherry tree to cut one down, the word of Ezekiel George Washington Scraggs is as good as the Father of his Country,' says I. 'He beat me at that last game, but I can stick to my sayin' like a porous plaster. You get the money; I will lie for the fun of the thing, but not for no dirty fifty dollars,' says I. 'You goin' toward town?'

"'Yes,' says he.

"'Well, git your plug, and we'll amble along together.'

"So we rode in, right cheerful, instead of quar'lin'. I made him come along to Maggy's cabin, to show it weren't a bluff about the money.

[Ill.u.s.tration: "So we rode in, right cheerful."]

"Poor Maggy, she wipes her eye on her ap.r.o.n, and says she'll start for our camp at oncet.

"I called the Chinaman aside, confidential. "'You take care of lady!' I shrieks at him. 'Lady--you take care!' I dunno why it is you think if you holler loud enough you can make a man understand anything, but it's a fact.

"My c.h.i.n.k bobs his head. 'Take clare laly,' he says.

"'Yaas!' says I. 'I rustley monnellee!'

"He bobs his head again.

"'Lusselleemonellee!' he answers, kind of vacant.

"I sot down. 'Twas clear he didn't have no idee of my conversation. So we went over it for two hours, me drawin' maps and wigglin' my fingers, and makin' faces to ill.u.s.trate a man with an ax-cut in the small of his back, and a lone widder-woman takin'

care of him, till at last, by bringin' hands, face, and feet all into the game, with a small hunk of kerfoozled English language here and there, a light broke on his heathen soul. He near bobbed his head off.

"'Me makee all lightee for Sclaggsee, you bettee, h.e.l.lee dammee!'

says he.

"He was that earnest I overlooked the name. 'Good,' says I. 'Now, Charlie, you cut wood, haul water, and keep things goin' out there and your fifty is waitin' for you on Tuesday.'

"Maggy did a crow-hop when she found she had to travel with the c.h.i.n.k, but I told her it was O.K., so she got aboard an Injin pony and off they goes to Pete.

"Well, dear friends and brothers, I sincerely hope you've never had to raise fifty dollars in a busted camp. The boys done the best they could, but a can of corn had to stand for fifty cents, and a pair of pants that would take Tartar Charlie somewheres about the knees drew a credit of two-fifty. Four iron knives and a busted coffee-pot stood for a case, and a pair of scissors with one blade broke half off, and a mouth-organ that only sounded in spots, was equal to two iron dollars. I got eighteen fifty in cash and the balance was junk.

"'Well,' says I, 'he's no better'n a road-agent, and I can't help it, nohow.'

"For all that, I sot in Jim Holt's place of a Tuesday afternoon feelin' low-spirited when I looked at the heap, when who comes sailin' in at the door but Tartar Charlie, wearin' a grin that took two turns and a half around his face.

"'Laly comee!' says he. 'Petee comee!'

"'On what?' says I, ashamed to show surprise to a yaller Chinaman.

"'Joss man fetchee!' says he.

"'Certainly!' says I. 'That's what he ought to do; don't get excited.' I did my wonderin' about the joss man in private. 'Sit down, Charlie.'

"So Charlie, he sot down and watched me rifflin' the cards.

"'Playee poker?' says he.

"'As a relaxiation, Charles,' says I. 'Poker is a business for gentlemen of means--gottee nomonee!'

"'Me stakee you,' says he. 'Likee poker.'

"So Jim and some of the other boys come over, and Charlie and me begun to draw cards. After we dubbed through a few deals, gettin'

on to each other's play, I see Charlie stow away a pair of aces.

Now, ordinarly, I'd complained, but, under the circ.u.mstances, it didn't appear to me to be the decent thing to do, so I motioned to Jim, and he slid me a pack with the same sort of backs.

"After that you never in all your borned days see such hands on a poker table. Why, a king-full wasn't worth raisin' back on. A set of fours was the least a man could have confidence in, and only if it was on his own deal, at that.

"Howsomever, havin' a hull pack at my disposal, whilest Charlie could only use his hold-outs, I worked him down to tin cans of vegetables, the busted coffee-pot, and the pants.

"He, bein' as game as any white man, jack-potted the lot. It was just draw cards and show down for the money. Darned if he didn't get the best of me.' How I come to pick out the queen of diamonds to match a straight club flush is one of them things that won't be revealed till Judgment Day. There wasn't n.o.buddy more surprised than me. This brought us down to even Stevens, and I felt irritated, so I come back at him with one play for the bunch. He agreed, and I dealt him four aces, pat. I was going to draw to fill my straight color. I snaked out the three I had on my knee, and was just goin' to insert 'em where they'd do the most good, when Pete's v'ice says: 'Well, Zeke!'

"It was a joyful v'ice, but I knowed he'd seen my play. I dropped them cards.