Mr. Punch in Bohemia Part 1

Mr. Punch in Bohemia.

by Various.

THE WAY TO BOHEMIA

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Time was when Bohemianism was synonymous with soiled linen and unkempt locks. But those days of the ragged Bohemia have happily pa.s.sed away, and that land of unconventional life--which had finally grown conventional in its characteristics--has now become "a sphere of influence" of Modern Society! In a word, it is now respectable. There are those who firmly believe it has been wiped off the social map. The dress suit and the proprieties are thought by some to be incompatible with its existence. But it is not so; the new Bohemia is surely no less delightful than the old. The way to it is through the doors of almost any of the well-known literary and art clubs of London. Its inhabitants are our artists, our men of letters, our musicians, and, above all, our actors.

In the present volume we are under the guidance of Mr. Punch, himself the very flower of London's Bohemia, into this land of light-hearted laughter and the free-and-easy manner of living. We shall follow him chiefly through the haunts of the knights of the pen and pencil, as we have another engagement to spend some agreeable hours with him in the theatrical and musical world. It should be noted, however, that we shall not be limited to what has been called "Upper Bohemia", but that we shall, thanks to his vast experience, be able to peep both at the old and new.

Easily first amongst the artists who have depicted the humours of Bohemia is Phil May. Keene and Du Maurier run him close, but their Bohemia is on the whole more artistic, less breezily, raggedly, hungrily unconventional than his. It is a subject that has inspired him with some of his best jokes, and some of his finest drawings.

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MR. PUNCH IN BOHEMIA

THE INVALID AUTHOR.--_Wife._ "Why, nurse is reading a book, darling! Who gave it her?" _Husband._ "_I_ did, my dear." _Wife._ "What book is it?"

_Husband._ "It's my last." _Wife._ "Darling! When you _knew_ how important it is that _she shouldn't go to sleep_!"

A BOOKWORM'S OBSERVATION.--When a man has got turned of 70, he is in the appendix of life.

TABLE OF CONTENTS.--The dinner table.

[Ill.u.s.tration: THE GRUB AND THE b.u.t.tERFLY

I.

"All right, sir. I'll just wash 'er face, sir, and then she shall come round to your stoodio, sir."

II.

"Here's a little girl come for you, sir!"]

PUNCH'S PROVERBS

Most sticks have two ends, and a m.u.f.f gets hold of the wrong one.

The good boy studies his lesson; the bad boy gets it.

If sixpence were sunshine, it would never be lost in the giving.

The man that is happy in all things will rejoice in potatoes.

Three removes are better than a dessert.

Dinner deferred maketh the hungry man mad.

Bacon without liver is food for the mind.

Forty winks or five million is one sleep.

You don't go to the Mansion House for skilligolee.

Three may keep counsel if they retain a barrister.

What is done cannot be underdone.

You can't make a pair of shoes out of a pig's tail.

Dinner hour is worth every other, except bedtime.

No hairdresser puts grease into a wise man's head.

An upright judge for a downright rogue.

Happiness is the hindmost horse in the Derby.

Look before you sit.

Bear and forebear is Bruin and tripe.

Believe twice as much as you hear of a lady's age.

Content is the conjuror that turns mock-turtle into real.

There is no one who perseveres in well-doing like a thorough humbug.

The loosest fish that drinks is tight.

Education won't polish boots.

Experience is the mother of gumption.

Half-a-crown is better than no bribe.