Men, Women, and Ghosts - novelonlinefull.com
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They were lighting the lamps now in the car. Harmon looked at the conductor's face, as the sickly yellow flare struck on it, with a curious sensation. He wondered if he had a wife and five children; if he ever thought of running away from them; what he would think of a man who did; what most people would think; what she would think. She!--ah, she had it all to find out yet.
"There's no place like home,"
said Tommy's little fiddle,
"O, no place like home."
Now this fiddle of Tommy's may have had a crack or so in it, and I cannot a.s.sert that Tommy never struck a false note; but the man in the corner was not fastidious as a musical critic; the sickly light was flickering through the car, the quiver on the red flats was quite out of sight, the train was shrieking away into the west,--the baleful, lonely west,--which was dying fast now out there upon the sea, and it is a fact that his hat went slowly down over his face again, and that his face went slowly down upon his arm.
There, in the lighted home out upon the flats, that had drifted by forever, she sat waiting now. It was about time for him to be in to supper; she was beginning to wonder a little where he was; she was keeping the coffee hot, and telling the children not to touch their father's pickles; she had set the table and drawn the chairs; his pipe lay filled for him upon the shelf over the stove. Her face in the light was worn and white,--the dark rings very dark; she was trying to hush the boys, teasing for their supper; begging them to wait a few minutes, only a few minutes, he would surely be here then. She would put the baby down presently, and stand at the window with her hands--Annie's hands once were not so thin--raised to shut out the light,--watching, watching.
The children would eat their supper; the table would stand untouched, with his chair in its place; still she would go to the window, and stand watching, watching. O, the long night that she must stand watching, and the days, and the years!
"Sweet, sweet home,"
played Tommy.
By and by there was no more of "Sweet Home."
"How about that cove with his head lopped down on his arms?" speculated Tommy, with a businesslike air.
He had only stirred once, then put his face down again. But he was awake, awake in every nerve; and listening, to the very curve of his fingers. Tommy knew that; it being part of his trade to learn how to use his eyes.
The sweet, loyal pa.s.sion of the music--it would take worse playing than Tommy's to drive the sweet, loyal pa.s.sion out of Annie Laurie--grew above the din of the train:--
"'T was there that Annie Laurie Gave me her promise true."
She used to sing that, the man was thinking,--this other Annie of his own. Why, she had been his own, and he had loved her once. How he had loved her! Yes, she used to sing that when he went to see her on Sunday nights, before they were married,--in her pink, plump, pretty days.
Annie used to be very pretty.
"Gave me her promise true,"
hummed the little fiddle.
"That's a fact," said poor Annie's husband, jerking the words out under his hat, "and kept it too, she did."
Ah, how Annie had kept it! The whole dark picture of her married years,--the days of work and pain, the nights of watching, the patient voice, the quivering mouth, the tact and the planning and the trust for to-morrow, the love that had borne all things, believed all things, hoped all things, uncomplaining,--rose into outline to tell him how she had kept it.
"Her face is as the fairest That e'er the sun shone on,"
suggested the little fiddle.
That it should be darkened forever, the sweet face! and that he should do it,--he, sitting here, with his ticket bought, bound for Colorado.
"And ne'er forget will I,"
murmured the little fiddle.
He would have knocked the man down who had told him twenty years ago that he ever should forget; that he should be here to-night, with his ticket bought, bound for Colorado.
But it was better for her to be free from him. He and his cursed ill-luck were a drag on her and the children, and would always be. What was that she had said once?
"Never mind, Jack, I can bear anything as long as I have you."
And here he was, with his ticket bought, bound for Colorado.
He wondered if it were ever too late in the day for a fellow to make a man of himself. He wondered--
"And she's a' the world to me, And for bonnie Annie Laurie I'd lay me down and dee,"
sang the little fiddle, triumphantly.
Harmon shook himself, and stood up. The train was slackening; the lights of a way-station bright ahead. It was about time for supper and his mother, so Tommy put down his fiddle and handed around his faded cap.
The merchant threw him a penny, and returned to his tax list. The old lady was fast asleep with her mouth open.
"Come here," growled Harmon, with his eyes very bright. Tommy shrank back, almost afraid of him.
"Come here," softening, "I won't hurt you. I tell you, boy, you don't know what you've done to-night."
"Done, sir?" Tommy couldn't help laughing, though there was a twinge of pain at his stout little heart, as he fingered the solitary penny in the faded cap. "Done? Well, I guess I've waked you up, sir, which was about what I meant to do."
"Yes, that is it," said Harmon, very distinctly, pushing up his hat, "you've waked me up. Here, hold your cap."
They had puffed into the station now, and stopped. He emptied his purse into the little cap, shook it clean of paper and copper alike, was out of the car and off the train before Tommy could have said Jack Robinson.
"My eyes!" gasped Tommy, "that chap had a ticket for New York, sure!
Methuselah! Look a here! One, two, three,--must have been crazy; that's it, crazy."
"He'll never find out," muttered Harmon, turning away from the station lights, and striking back through the night for the red flats and home.
"He'll never find out what he has done, nor, please G.o.d, shall she."
It was late when he came in sight of the house; it had been a long tramp across the tracks, and hard; he being stung by a bitter wind from the east all the way, tired with the monotonous treading of the sleepers, and with crouching in perilous niches to let the trains go by.
She stood watching at the window, as he had known that she would stand, her hands raised to her face, her figure cut out against the warm light of the room.
He stood still a moment and looked at her, hidden in the shadow of the street, thinking his own thoughts. The publican, in the old story, hardly entered the beautiful temple with more humble step than he his home that night.
She sprang to meet him, pale with her watching and fear.
"Worried, Annie, were you? I haven't been drinking; don't be frightened,--no, not the theatre, either, this time. Some business, dear; business that delayed me. I'm sorry you were worried, I am, Annie.
I've had a long walk. It is pleasant here. I believe I'm tired, Annie."
He faltered, and turned away his face.
"Dear me," said Annie, "why, you poor fellow, you are all tired out.
Sit right up here by the fire, and I will bring the coffee. I've tried so hard not to let it boil away, you don't know, Jack, and I was so afraid something had happened to you."
Her face, her voice, her touch, seemed more than he could bear for a minute, perhaps. He gulped down his coffee, choking.