Mary Olivier: a Life - novelonlinefull.com
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"I know that as well as you," her mother said surprisingly.
She drew herself from the protecting arm.
"Well, then--But, oh, what a brute he is. _What_ a brute!"
"For shame to talk that way of your father. _You've_ no right. You're the one that always goes scot-free."
And, beginning to cry again, she rose and went out, grasping Mark's sock in her convulsive hand.
"Mary, did you hear your mother say I bullied you?"
Her father had come back into the room.
"Yes," she said.
"Have I ever bullied you?"
She looked at him steadily.
"No. You would have done if Mamma had loved me as much as she loves Mark.
I wish you had. I wish you'd bullied the life out of me. I shouldn't have cared. I wish you'd hated me. Then I should have known she loved me."
He looked at her in silence, with round, startled eyes. He understood.
II.
"Ubique--"
The gunner's motto. Mark's motto, stamped on all the letters he would write. A blue gun on a blue gun-carriage, the muzzle pointing to the left. The motto waving underneath:
"UBIQUE."
At soldiers' funerals the coffin was carried on a gun-carriage and covered with a flag.
"_Ubique quo fas et gloria duc.u.n.t_." All through the excitement of the evening it went on sounding in her head.
It was Mark's coming of age party in the week before he went. The first time she could remember being important at a party. Her consciousness of being important was intense, exquisite. She was Sub-Lieutenant Mark Olivier's sister. His only one.
And, besides, she looked nice.
Last year's white muslin, ironed out, looked as good as new. The blue sash really was new; and Mamma had lent her one of her necklets, a turquoise heart on a thin gold chain. In the looking-gla.s.s she could see her eyes shining under her square brown fringe: spots of gold darting through brown crystal. Her brown hair shone red on the top and gold underneath. The side pieces, rolled above her ears and plaited behind, made a fillet for her back hair. Her back hair was too short. She tried to make it reach to her waist by pulling the curled tips straight; but they only sprang back to her shoulder-blades again. It was unfortunate.
Catty, securing the wonderful fillet with a blue ribbon told her not to be unhappy. She would "do."
Mamma was beautiful in her lavender-grey silk and her black jet cross with the diamond star. They all had to stand together, a little behind her, near the door, and shake hands with the people as they came in. Mary was surprised that they should shake hands with her before they shook hands with Mark; it didn't seem right, somehow, when it was his birthday.
Everybody had come except Aunt Charlotte; even Mr. Marriott, though he was supposed to be afraid of parties. (You couldn't ask Aunt Charlotte because of Mr. Marriott.) There were the two Manistys, looking taller and leaner than ever. And there was Mrs. Draper with Dora and Effie. Mrs.
Draper, black hawk's eyes in purple rings; white powder over crushed carmines; a black wing of hair folded over grey down. Effie's pretty, piercing face; small head poised to strike. Dora, a young likeness of Mrs. Draper, an old likeness of Effie, pretty when Effie wasn't there.
When they looked at you you saw that your muslin was not as good as new.
When they looked at Mamma you saw that her lavender silk was old-fashioned and that n.o.body wore black jet crosses now. You were frilly and floppy when everybody else was tight and straight in Princess dresses.
Mamma was more beautiful than Mrs. Draper; and her hair, anyhow, was in the fashion, parted at the side, a soft brown wing folded over her left ear.
But that made her look small and pathetic--a wounded bird. She ought not to have been made to look like that.
You could hear Dora and Effie being kind to Mamma. "Dear Mrs.
Olivier"--Indulgence--Condescension. As if to an unfortunate and rather foolish person. Mark could see that. He was smiling: a hard, angry smile.
Mrs. Draper was Mamma's dearest friend. They could sit and talk to each other about nothing for hours together. In the holidays Mrs. Draper used to be always coming over to talk to Mamma, always bringing Dora and Effie with her, always asking Mark and Dan and Roddy to her house, always wondering why Mark never went.
Dan went. Dan seemed as if he couldn't keep away.
This year Mrs. Draper had left off asking Mark and Dan and Roddy. She had left off bringing Dora and Effie with her.
Mary wondered why she had brought them now, and why her mother had asked them.
The Manistys. She had brought them for the Manistys. She wanted Mamma to see what she had brought them for. And Mamma had asked them because she didn't care, and wanted them to see that she didn't care, and that Mark didn't care either.
If they only knew how Mark detested them with their "_Dear_ Mrs.
Olivier"!
Something was going on. She heard Uncle Victor saying to Aunt Lavvy, "Mark's party is a bit rough on Dan."
Dan was trying to get to Effie through a gap in the group formed by the Manistys and two young subalterns, Mark's friends. Each time he did it Mrs. Draper stopped him by moving somehow so as to fill the gap. He gave it up at last, to sit by himself at the bottom of the room, jammed into a corner between the chimney-piece and the rosewood cabinet, where he stared at Effie with hot, unhappy eyes.
Supper. Mamma was worried about the supper. She would have liked to have given them a nicer one, but there wasn't enough money; besides, she was afraid of what Uncle Victor would think if they were extravagant. That was the worst of borrowing, Mark said; you couldn't spend so much afterwards. Still, there was enough wine yet in the cellar for fifty parties. You could see, now, some advantage in Papa's habit of never drinking any but the best wine and laying in a large stock of it while he could.
Mary noticed that Papa and Dan drank the most. Perhaps Dan drank more than Papa. The smell of wine was over all the supper, spoiling it, sending through her nerves a reminiscent shiver of disgust.
Mark brought her back into the dining-room for the ice she hadn't had.
Dan was there, by himself, sitting in the place Effie had just left.
Effie's gla.s.s had still some wine in it. You could see him look for the wet side of the rim and suck the drops that had touched her mouth.
Something small and white was on the floor beside him. Effie's pocket-handkerchief. He stooped for it. You could hear him breathing up the scent on it with big, sighing sobs.
They slunk back into the drawing-room.
Mark asked her to play something.
"Make a noise, Minky. Perhaps they'll go."
"The Hungarian March." She could play it better than Mamma. Mamma never could see that the ba.s.s might be even more important than the treble. She was glad that she could play it better than Mamma, and she hated herself for being glad.
Mark stood by the piano and looked at her as she played. They talked under cover of the "Droom--Droom--Droom-era-room."
"Mark, am I looking too awful?"
"No. Pretty Minx. Very pretty Minx."