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Manners and Rules of Good Society Part 15

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The same etiquette should be observed on the departure of royal guests as on their arrival.

=General Introductions= should not be made to royal guests, and introductions should be made by request only.

Gentlemen present at a ball are expected to ask the daughters of the house for one dance at least.

A hostess should use her own discretion as to any introduction she thinks proper to make. When a ball is given in the country, the hostess should endeavour to find partners for those young ladies who are strangers to the general company. But when a ball is given in town, she is not expected to do so, as in town the guests are supposed to be acquainted with each other more or less, and to be independent of the kind offices of a hostess.

=The Dances mainly in vogue at the moment= are, "Valses," "The Boston,"



"Two Steps," and "The Cotillon," in which handsome presents are given.

"Quadrilles" are danced at "State b.a.l.l.s," and at those b.a.l.l.s at which the King and Queen are present. Also at "Fancy Dress b.a.l.l.s." "Lancers"

are danced occasionally at "Hunt b.a.l.l.s."

=The Precedency observed= in sending guests in to supper is far more punctiliously followed in the country than in town. The host should take in the lady of highest rank present, and the hostess should endeavour to send in the princ.i.p.al guests according to their individual rank; but in town she generally leaves the guests to follow the host and lady of highest rank according to their inclinations, a guest should not enter the supper-room before the host has done so.

When a gentleman takes a lady in to supper, he should re-conduct her to the ball-room as a matter of course; the fact of friends joining her in the supper-room would not relieve him from this obligation. And the same etiquette applies equally to a lady. She should return to the ball-room only with the gentleman who has taken her down to supper, unless she is engaged for the ensuing dance, when her partner might come in quest of her; she should then return to the ball-room with him.

It is not usual for guests to take leave of a hostess at a London ball.

This remark applies to acquaintances of the hostess, and not to intimate friends.

At a country ball the guests are on a more friendly footing than is generally the case in town; and, therefore, make a point of taking leave of the hostess if possible.

It is optional whether a host conducts a lady to her carriage or not. In the country more is expected of him than in town in this respect, as at a London ball, such a civility would involve a vast amount of exertion which few hosts would be willing to undergo: ladies accompanied by an acquaintance generally make their way to their carriages.

=The Custom of covering in Small Balconies= and the windows of the drawing-rooms where a ball takes place, rendering the atmosphere of the room almost insupportable from the total exclusion of air, is fast disappearing. The s.p.a.ce gained by this means for the accommodation of the guests is totally disproportionate to the discomfort thereby entailed upon them.

Ball-givers have at length realised the mistake of crowding two hundred to three hundred people together into rooms not properly ventilated, and it is now the rule, when covering in balconies, to introduce window frames into the bunting covering, and to drape them with lace curtains, etc., the windows of the ball-room being entirely removed.

Large blocks of ice are frequently placed in convenient spots for the purpose of cooling the atmosphere, and coloured ice produces a pretty effect.

Patent ventilators are also much in use, and the subst.i.tution of electric lighting, on account of its emitting little heat, has become general.

Ball-goers appreciate these alterations as only those who have experienced the close, stifling atmosphere of an over-crowded ball-room can do, and as half the London ball-rooms are only average-sized drawing-rooms, the absurdity of excluding air from the ball-room with yards of thick canvas cannot be too severely criticised.

Ball-givers, too, frequently issue far more invitations than the size of their rooms authorises, under the mistaken idea that to have a great crowd in their rooms is to give a good ball.

But experienced ball-givers limit the number of their invitations to under two hundred, instead of expanding it to over three hundred.

=The Country Ball Season= ostensibly commences in November, reaches its zenith in January, and terminates early in February.

The stewards of these b.a.l.l.s are, as a rule, the representatives of the various cla.s.ses by whom they are attended; the members of the aristocracy residing in the county heading the list of stewards, and the members of the professional cla.s.ses usually closing it.

The top of the ball-room is, as a rule, appropriated by the aristocratic element, head stewards and "lady patronesses."

The enjoyment derived from country b.a.l.l.s depends upon a variety of circ.u.mstances, which do not influence in a like degree the ball-going world of London.

=County b.a.l.l.s= are princ.i.p.ally composed of a series of large parties brought by different ladies in the neighbourhood where the ball is held; but there are two cla.s.ses of county b.a.l.l.s, b.a.l.l.s which are held in large and populous towns and attended by the princ.i.p.al residents of the towns, with only a small sprinkling of the county aristocracy and county gentry.

There are also Hunt b.a.l.l.s and annual Charity b.a.l.l.s which take place between October and February, and which are an amalgamation of both cla.s.ses of b.a.l.l.s.

The neighbourhood where a ball is held is a sufficient indication as to whether it is likely to be a smart one or not.

As a rule the leading ladies of a county lend their names as patronesses and supporters of a charity ball, although it by no means follows that they will personally attend it; but a long list of influential patronesses materially increases the sale of tickets, which is the result to be achieved.

A large attendance is not the primary object of a county ball, as the sum raised by the sale of tickets is only required to defray the expenses of the ball, although these are sometimes considerable, especially when the decorations are elaborate, and the arrangements on a grand scale, in which case there is not seldom a deficiency rather than a surplus, which deficiency is defrayed by the stewards themselves.

To ensure a good ball considerable unanimity on the part of the county ladies is demanded, and they usually meet and consult together previous to fixing the date of the ball, to take into consideration the fixtures of neighbouring county b.a.l.l.s, and so avoid the possibility of the said b.a.l.l.s clashing with their own county ball, and also with a view of perhaps attracting the house parties of their more distant neighbours to swell the numbers at their own ball.

House parties invited for a ball vary from ten to twenty-five, as the accommodation of a house admits.

It is not the province of the stewards of a ball to find partners for either ladies or gentlemen, and therefore, if a lady does not form one of a large party, but merely attends a county ball with a relative or friend, and has not a large acquaintance amongst these present, she has very little chance of obtaining partners.

Young ladies do not now return to their chaperons after each dance, or after they have been to the tea-room.

A gentleman should offer his arm to his partner at the conclusion of a dance to conduct her to the tea-room. In round dances, it is customary to take frequent pauses, and not to race round the ball-room until the music ceases.

At country b.a.l.l.s programmes are invariably used; at London b.a.l.l.s they are never used, save at public b.a.l.l.s.

County b.a.l.l.s usually commence between nine and ten o'clock, sometimes a ball is not opened until the most influential of the stewards and their parties have arrived, but oftener than not the two first dances are over before the arrival of the county magnates.

It depends upon the length of the drive at what time people arrive at a ball; as a rule, they do not arrive later than 10.30 p.m.

The usual mode of conveying a house-party to a ball is by private omnibus in addition to carriages and motor-cars; but when these are hired for the occasion the expense should be defrayed by the guests themselves.

It is usual to leave a country ball not later than half-past two; the most fashionable people invariably do so about that hour.

As a matter of course persons attending public b.a.l.l.s take their ball tickets with them.

=When attending a Military Ball=, or a Hunt Ball, it is usually the rule to take the invitation card and hand it to the sergeant or official in attendance.

It is sometimes stated on the invitation card that this is to be done, although it is often taken for granted that persons will do so of their own accord.

At b.a.l.l.s given by private individuals, the invited guests should not bring their invitation cards with them, unless in the case of a _bal masque_, where they are sometimes requested to do so.

In giving a ball three weeks' notice is considered necessary, but with regard to a dance a short ten days' notice would suffice.

=The Invitation Card= is the usual "at home" card, the word "Dancing"

being printed in the corner of the card.

The word "ball" should never be used on an invitation card, however grand the entertainment; and the same form of invitation is employed either in the case of a small dance or of a large ball, though in the event of a small dance only being given, the words "Small" or "Early"

should be written or printed on the invitation card.

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Manners and Rules of Good Society Part 15 summary

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