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MRS FORE. Why, was I ever in any of those places? What do you mean, sister?
MRS FRAIL. Was I? What do you mean?
MRS FORE. You have been at a worse place.
MRS FRAIL. I at a worse place, and with a man!
MRS FORE. I suppose you would not go alone to the World's End.
MRS FRAIL. The World's End! What, do you mean to banter me?
MRS FORE. Poor innocent! You don't know that there's a place called the World's End? I'll swear you can keep your countenance purely: you'd make an admirable player.
MRS FRAIL. I'll swear you have a great deal of confidence, and in my mind too much for the stage.
MRS FORE. Very well, that will appear who has most; you never were at the World's End?
MRS FRAIL. No.
MRS FORE. You deny it positively to my face?
MRS FRAIL. Your face, what's your face?
MRS FORE. No matter for that, it's as good a face as yours.
MRS FRAIL. Not by a dozen years' wearing. But I do deny it positively to your face, then.
MRS FORE. I'll allow you now to find fault with my face; for I'll swear your impudence has put me out of countenance. But look you here now, where did you lose this gold bodkin? Oh, sister, sister!
MRS FRAIL. My bodkin!
MRS FORE. Nay, 'tis yours, look at it.
MRS FRAIL. Well, if you go to that, where did you find this bodkin?
Oh, sister, sister! Sister every way.
MRS FORE. Oh, devil on't, that I could not discover her without betraying myself. [Aside.]
MRS FRAIL. I have heard gentlemen say, sister, that one should take great care, when one makes a thrust in fencing, not to lie open oneself.
MRS FORE. It's very true, sister. Well, since all's out, and as you say, since we are both wounded, let us do what is often done in duels, take care of one another, and grow better friends than before.
MRS FRAIL. With all my heart: ours are but slight flesh wounds, and if we keep 'em from air, not at all dangerous. Well, give me your hand in token of sisterly secrecy and affection.
MRS FORE. Here 'tis, with all my heart.
MRS FRAIL. Well, as an earnest of friendship and confidence, I'll acquaint you with a design that I have. To tell truth, and speak openly one to another, I'm afraid the world have observed us more than we have observed one another. You have a rich husband, and are provided for. I am at a loss, and have no great stock either of fortune or reputation, and therefore must look sharply about me.
Sir Sampson has a son that is expected to-night, and by the account I have heard of his education, can be no conjurer. The estate you know is to be made over to him. Now if I could wheedle him, sister, ha? You understand me?
MRS FORE. I do, and will help you to the utmost of my power. And I can tell you one thing that falls out luckily enough; my awkward daughter-in-law, who you know is designed to be his wife, is grown fond of Mr Tattle; now if we can improve that, and make her have an aversion for the b.o.o.by, it may go a great way towards his liking you. Here they come together; and let us contrive some way or other to leave 'em together.
SCENE X.
[To them] TATTLE and MISS PRUE.
MISS. Mother, mother, mother, look you here!
MRS FORE. Fie, fie, Miss, how you bawl! Besides, I have told you, you must not call me mother.
MISS. What must I call you then, are you not my father's wife?
MRS FORE. Madam; you must say madam. By my soul, I shall fancy myself old indeed to have this great girl call me mother. Well, but Miss, what are you so overjoyed at?
MISS. Look you here, madam, then, what Mr Tattle has given me.
Look you here, cousin, here's a snuff-box; nay, there's snuff in't.
Here, will you have any? Oh, good! How sweet it is. Mr Tattle is all over sweet, his peruke is sweet, and his gloves are sweet, and his handkerchief is sweet, pure sweet, sweeter than roses. Smell him, mother--madam, I mean. He gave me this ring for a kiss.
TATT. O fie, Miss, you must not kiss and tell.
MISS. Yes; I may tell my mother. And he says he'll give me something to make me smell so. Oh, pray lend me your handkerchief.
Smell, cousin; he says he'll give me something that will make my smocks smell this way. Is not it pure? It's better than lavender, mun. I'm resolved I won't let nurse put any more lavender among my smocks--ha, cousin?
MRS FRAIL. Fie, Miss; amongst your linen, you must say. You must never say smock.
MISS. Why, it is not bawdy, is it, cousin?
TATT. Oh, madam; you are too severe upon Miss; you must not find fault with her pretty simplicity: it becomes her strangely. Pretty Miss, don't let 'em persuade you out of your innocency.
MRS FORE. Oh, demm you toad. I wish you don't persuade her out of her innocency.
TATT. Who, I, madam? O Lord, how can your ladyship have such a thought? Sure, you don't know me.
MRS FRAIL. Ah devil, sly devil. He's as close, sister, as a confessor. He thinks we don't observe him.
MRS FORE. A cunning cur, how soon he could find out a fresh, harmless creature; and left us, sister, presently.
TATT. Upon reputation
MRS FORE. They're all so, sister, these men. They love to have the spoiling of a young thing, they are as fond of it, as of being first in the fashion, or of seeing a new play the first day. I warrant it would break Mr Tattle's heart to think that anybody else should be beforehand with him.
TATT. O Lord, I swear I would not for the world -
MRS FRAIL. O hang you; who'll believe you? You'd be hanged before you'd confess. We know you--she's very pretty! Lord, what pure red and white!--she looks so wholesome; ne'er stir: I don't know, but I fancy, if I were a man -
MISS. How you love to jeer one, cousin.
MRS FORE. Hark'ee, sister, by my soul the girl is spoiled already.