Life of Beethoven Part 15

"BEETHOVEN."

III.

"_May 22, 1825._

"I have been a.s.sured, although hitherto it has been only matter of conjecture, that you have again been carrying on a clandestine intercourse with your mother. Am I again to experience this hateful ingrat.i.tude? Shall the tie between us be severed?--So be it then. You will be detested by every impartial person who shall hear of your ingrat.i.tude. The expressions used by my brother, and your own of yesterday, with respect to Dr. S----r, must of course be painful to me, since the very reverse of what he requires has been decided by the tribunal.[96] Am I continually to be forced to entangle myself in these abominations? Never again! Is the agreement become burdensome to you? Be it so, in G.o.d's name! I have done my part, and leave you to Providence.

I do not fear to answer for my conduct before the judgment-seat of the Almighty.

"BEETHOVEN."

IV.

"_Baden, May 31, 1825._

"Enough of this! Spoiled as you have been, it would do you no injury to pay some attention at last to simplicity and truth. I have suffered too much from your artifices, and it will be a hard matter for me to forget them. Even if I would always submit, without murmuring, like an ox to the yoke, if you should behave thus towards others, you will never gain the good-will of any human creature. G.o.d knows all I wish is to be freed from you, from this base brother, and from these my worthless relations.

May G.o.d hear my prayer! for I can never trust you more.

"Your father--alas!

"yet, fortunately not your father."

V.

(In answer to an account of money received.)

"_June 18, 1825._

" ... Let us not look further back. It would be easy to do so, but it would only be painful for me; at last it would only be--'you are a very good guardian, &c.... Were you but a little steadier, you would have always acted differently.'

"BEETHOVEN."

VI.

"_July 18, 1825._

"Dear Son,

"Only be moderate. Fortune has crowned my endeavours, but let no mistaken views lead you into embarra.s.sment. Be candid and exact in the account of your expenses. Let the theatre rest for the present. Be ruled by your father, and guided by him whose every wish has been invariably directed towards your moral welfare as well as your worldly prosperity!

Be indeed my son. What an unheard-of discord would it be, if you were indeed false to me, as some people still maintain!

"BEETHOVEN."

VII.

"I am growing thinner and thinner, and am indeed very poorly, without having any doctor, or any one to feel for me. If it be possible, come to me. But I do not wish to be any hindrance to you. I wish I were only sure that the Sunday would be properly spent without me. I must learn to give up all. Would that these great sacrifices might only bring forth good fruits!

"Where am I not injured and wounded? Have no secret dealings with my brother. Once for all, have no secrets from me--from your affectionate father. If I am angry, ascribe it to my anxiety on your account, for you are exposed to much peril. Think of my sufferings and give me no uneasiness. I ought by rights to have no fears of this kind,----but what have I not experienced!

"BEETHOVEN."

VIII.

"'Come soon, come soon, come soon.' Be it so. The day before yesterday came my Signor Fratello[97] and his brother-in-law. What a wretched creature! If Cato, speaking of Caesar, exclaimed 'This man and we'--what shall we say of such a one as this?

"Now, as ever, thine anxious and

"affectionate Father,

"BEETHOVEN."

IX.

_September, 1825._

"I do not wish that you should come to me on the 14th inst. It is better that you should finish your studies. G.o.d has never yet forsaken me, and some one will be found to close my eyes. There seems to me indeed to be something pre-ordained in all that has taken place, in which my brother (Pseudo) plays a part. I know that you have no wish to come to me even afterwards, and it is natural that it should be so. Such a sphere as mine is too pure for you.... You need not come on Sundays, either, for, after such behaviour, true harmony and concord can never subsist; and what is the use of hypocrisy? Be, in reality, a better man; but use no deceit, no lies; it will be all the better for your moral character in the end. You see your conduct is reflected in the mirror of my mind. The kindest remonstrances would be of no avail. You will, in either case, be incensed. For the rest, be under no apprehension. I will continue my cares for you as usual. What troubles do you not occasion me! Farewell.

He who has not indeed bestowed on you your life, but the support of that life, and what is more than all else, the cultivation of your mind, as a father--nay more than that--most fervently implores you to keep in the only true path to all that is right and good.

"Your faithful affectionate Father,

"BEETHOVEN."

X.

"My dear son,--No more of this--come to my arms, you shall not hear one harsh word. For G.o.d's sake, do not ruin yourself: you shall be received as kindly as ever. As to what is to be thought of, and done for the future, we will talk it over in a friendly manner together. Upon my word of honour, you shall hear no reproaches, which, indeed can now do no good. You have nothing to expect from me but the most anxious and affectionate care for your welfare. Only come, come to the heart of your father,

"BEETHOVEN."

XI.

_October 5, 1825._

"I have just received your letter. I was excessively anxious, and had made up my mind to go to-day to Vienna. Thank G.o.d, it is not necessary.

Only be obedient to me, and affection, peace of mind, and worldly prosperity, will be our united lot. You will enjoy an inward and spiritual, as well as a material, existence. But let the former be preferred to the latter.

"A thousand times I embrace and kiss you, not my lost, but my new-born son. For you, my restored child, will your affectionate father ever care.

"BEETHOVEN."

XII.