Letters of John Keats to His Family and Friends Part 29

My dear f.a.n.n.y--It is impossible for me to call on you to-day--for I have particular Business at the other end of the Town this morning, and must be back to Hampstead with all speed to keep a long agreed on appointment.

To-morrow I shall see you.

Your affectionate Brother

JOHN ----.

XCVI.--TO JOSEPH SEVERN.

Wentworth Place, Monday Aft. [March 29? 1819].

My dear Severn--Your note gave me some pain, not on my own account, but on yours. Of course I should never suffer any petty vanity of mine to hinder you in any wise; and therefore I should say "put the miniature in the exhibition" if only myself was to be hurt. But, will it not hurt you? What good can it do to any future picture. Even a large picture is lost in that canting place--what a drop of water in the ocean is a Miniature. Those who might chance to see it for the most part if they had ever heard of either of us and know what we were and of what years would laugh at the puff of the one and the vanity of the other. I am however in these matters a very bad judge--and would advise you to act in a way that appears to yourself the best for your interest. As your "Hermia and Helena" is finished send that without the prologue of a Miniature. I shall see you soon, if you do not pay me a visit sooner--there's a Bull for you.

Yours ever sincerely

JOHN KEATS.

XCVII.--TO f.a.n.n.y KEATS.

Wentworth Place [April 13, 1819].

My dear f.a.n.n.y--I have been expecting a Letter from you about what the Parson said to your answers. I have thought also of writing to you often, and I am sorry to confess that my neglect of it has been but a small instance of my idleness of late--which has been growing upon me, so that it will require a great shake to get rid of it. I have written nothing and almost read nothing--but I must turn over a new leaf. One most discouraging thing hinders me--we have no news yet from George--so that I cannot with any confidence continue the Letter I have been preparing for him. Many are in the same state with us and many have heard from the Settlement. They must be well however: and we must consider this silence as good news. I ordered some bulbous roots for you at the Gardener's, and they sent me some, but they were all in bud--and could not be sent--so I put them in our Garden. There are some beautiful heaths now in bloom in Pots--either heaths or some seasonable plants I will send you instead--perhaps some that are not yet in bloom that you may see them come out. To-morrow night I am going to a rout, a thing I am not at all in love with. Mr. Dilke and his Family have left Hampstead--I shall dine with them to-day in Westminster where I think I told you they were going to reside for the sake of sending their son Charles to the Westminster School. I think I mentioned the Death of Mr. Haslam's Father. Yesterday week the two Mr. Wylies dined with me. I hope you have good store of double violets--I think they are the Princesses of flowers, and in a shower of rain, almost as fine as barley sugar drops are to a schoolboy's tongue. I suppose this fine weather the lambs' tails give a frisk or two extraordinary--when a boy would cry huzza and a Girl O my! a little Lamb frisks its tail. I have not been lately through Leicester Square--the first time I do I will remember your Seals. I have thought it best to live in Town this Summer, chiefly for the sake of books, which cannot be had with any comfort in the Country--besides my Scotch journey gave me a dose of the Picturesque with which I ought to be contented for some time. Westminster is the place I have pitched upon--the City or any place very confined would soon turn me pale and thin--which is to be avoided. You must make up your mind to get stout this summer--indeed I have an idea we shall both be corpulent old folks with triple chins and stumpy thumbs.

Your affectionate Brother

JOHN.

XCVIII.--TO BENJAMIN ROBERT HAYDON.

Tuesday [April 13, 1819].

My dear Haydon--When I offered you a.s.sistance I thought I had it in my hand; I thought I had nothing to do but to do. The difficulties I met with arose from the alertness and suspicion of Abbey: and especially from the affairs being still in a Lawyer's hand--who has been draining our Property for the last six years of every charge he could make. I cannot do two things at once, and thus this affair has stopped my pursuits in every way--from the first prospect I had of difficulty. I a.s.sure you I have hara.s.sed myself ten times more than if I alone had been concerned in so much gain or loss. I have also ever told you the exact particulars as well as and as literally as any hopes or fear could translate them: for it was only by parcels that I found all those petty obstacles which for my own sake should not exist a moment--and yet why not--for from my own imprudence and neglect all my accounts are entirely in my Guardian's Power. This has taught me a Lesson. Hereafter I will be more correct. I find myself possessed of much less than I thought for and now if I had all on the table all I could do would be to take from it a moderate two years'

subsistence and lend you the rest; but I cannot say how soon I could become possessed of it. This would be no sacrifice nor any matter worth thinking of--much less than parting as I have more than once done with little sums which might have gradually formed a library to my taste. These sums amount together to nearly 200, which I have but a chance of ever being repaid or paid at a very distant period. I am humble enough to put this in writing from the sense I have of your struggling situation and the great desire that you should do me the justice to credit me the unostentatious and willing state of my nerves on all such occasions. It has not been my fault. I am doubly hurt at the slightly reproachful tone of your note and at the occasion of it,--for it must be some other disappointment; you seem'd so sure of some important help when I last saw you--now you have maimed me again; I was whole, I had began reading again--when your note came I was engaged in a Book. I dread as much as a Plague the idle fever of two months more without any fruit. I will walk over the first fine day: then see what aspect your affairs have taken, and if they should continue gloomy walk into the City to Abbey and get his consent for I am persuaded that to me alone he will not concede a jot.

XCIX.--TO f.a.n.n.y KEATS.

Wentworth Place, Sat.u.r.day.

[April 17, 1819?]

My dear f.a.n.n.y--If it were but six o'Clock in the morning I would set off to see you to-day: if I should do so now I could not stop long enough for a how d'ye do--it is so long a walk through Hornsey and Tottenham--and as for Stage Coaching it besides that it is very expensive it is like going into the Boxes by way of the pit. I cannot go out on Sunday--but if on Monday it should promise as fair as to-day I will put on a pair of loose easy palatable boots and me rendre chez vous. I continue increasing my letter to George to send it by one of Birkbeck's sons who is going out soon--so if you will let me have a few more lines, they will be in time. I am glad you got on so well with Mons{r.} le Cure. Is he a nice clergyman?--a great deal depends upon a c.o.c.k'd hat and powder--not gunpowder, lord love us, but lady-meal, violet-smooth, dainty-scented, lilly-white, feather-soft, wigsby-dressing, coat-collar-spoiling, whisker-reaching, pig-tail-loving, swans-down-puffing, parson-sweetening powder. I shall call in pa.s.sing at the Tottenham nursery and see if I can find some seasonable plants for you. That is the nearest place--or by our la'kin or lady kin, that is by the virgin Mary's kindred, is there not a twig-manufacturer in Walthamstow? Mr. and Mrs. Dilke are coming to dine with us to-day. They will enjoy the country after Westminster. O there is nothing like fine weather, and health, and Books, and a fine country, and a contented Mind, and diligent habit of reading and thinking, and an amulet against the ennui--and, please heaven, a little claret wine cool out of a cellar a mile deep--with a few or a good many ratafia cakes--a rocky basin to bathe in, a strawberry bed to say your prayers to Flora in, a pad nag to go you ten miles or so; two or three sensible people to chat with; two or three spiteful folks to spar with; two or three odd fishes to laugh at and two or three numskulls to argue with--instead of using dumb bells on a rainy day--

Two or three Posies With two or three simples-- Two or three Noses With two or three pimples-- Two or three wise men And two or three ninny's-- Two or three purses And two or three guineas-- Two or three raps At two or three doors-- Two or three naps Of two or three hours-- Two or three Cats And two or three mice-- Two or three sprats At a very great price-- Two or three sandies And two or three tabbies-- Two or three dandies And two Mrs.---- mum Two or three Smiles And two or three frowns-- Two or three Miles To two or three towns-- Two or three pegs For two or three bonnets-- Two or three dove eggs To hatch into sonnets-- Good-bye I've an appointment--can't stop pon word--good-bye--now don't get up--open the door my- self--good-bye--see ye Monday.

J. K.

C.--TO f.a.n.n.y KEATS.

[Hampstead, May 13, 1819.]

My dear f.a.n.n.y--I have a Letter from George at last--and it contains, considering all things, good news--I have been with it to-day to Mrs.

Wylie's, with whom I have left it. I shall have it again as soon as possible and then I will walk over and read it to you. They are quite well and settled tolerably in comfort after a great deal of fatigue and hara.s.s.

They had the good chance to meet at Louisville with a Schoolfellow of ours. You may expect me within three days. I am writing to-night several notes concerning this to many of my friends. Good-night! G.o.d bless you.

JOHN KEATS.

CI.--TO f.a.n.n.y KEATS.

[Hampstead, May 26, 1819.]

My dear f.a.n.n.y--I have been looking for a fine day to pa.s.s at Walthamstow: there has not been one Morning (except Sunday and then I was obliged to stay at home) that I could depend upon. I have I am sorry to say had an accident with the Letter--I sent it to Haslam and he returned it torn into a thousand pieces. So I shall be obliged to tell you all I can remember from Memory. You would have heard from me before this but that I was in continual expectation of a fine Morning--I want also to speak to you concerning myself. Mind I do not purpose to quit England, as George has done; but I am afraid I shall be forced to take a voyage or two. However we will not think of that for some Months. Should it be a fine morning to-morrow you will see me.

Your affectionate Brother

JOHN ----.

CII.--TO f.a.n.n.y KEATS.

Wentworth Place [June 9, 1819].

My dear f.a.n.n.y--I shall be with you next Monday at the farthest. I could not keep my promise of seeing you again in a week because I am in so unsettled a state of mind about what I am to do--I have given up the Idea of the Indiaman; I cannot resolve to give up my favorite studies: so I purpose to retire into the Country and set my Mind at work once more. A Friend of Mine who has an ill state of health called on me yesterday and proposed to spend a little time with him at the back of the Isle of Wight where he said we might live very cheaply. I agreed to his proposal. I have taken a great dislike to Town--I never go there--some one is always calling on me and as we have spare beds they often stop a couple of days.

I have written lately to some acquaintances in Devonshire concerning a cheap Lodging and they have been very kind in letting me know all I wanted. They have described a pleasant place which I think I shall eventually retire to. How came you on with my young Master Yorkshire Man?