My First Diary 4 Chapter 4 - Who Am I?

"It's 8 PM already!" Emma thinks to herself, "ahh time pa.s.ses fast, sometimes too fast" adds Emma to her thought. *ping!* Emma revives a message from Jennifer, "do you wanna come over to my birthday last this Sat.u.r.day?" reads Emma as she tries to decide, she begins to think who will and will not be there, what they will and will not do, but in the end she decides to go as its her friend, "sure I am down... I guess" texts Emma back to Jennifer. "Emma, come downstairs, you need to get your food ready" Emma's mom calls Emma, "okay" Emma answers.

Emma begins her way downstairs, but she turns her head to look behind her.... she feels like something... or someone is watching her, she begins to walk faster and faster before reaching the final step. "Come on Emma" called Emma's mother,"c-coming" Emma answers as she begins to hesitate to move. "Mum?" Emma calls.... "mum?" she calls out again,"Yes darling?" her mother says.... "I feel like something is wrong, like someone is watching me..." Emma explains,"don't worry, it's normal, I felt the same thing when I was your age" Her mom tells her in hope to comfort Emma. "I don't know mom.... I... I feel like..." Emma tries to explain but gets interrupted by her mother "it happened before?" her mother suggests. "Y.. yes, how do you know?!" Emma asks as she begins to find it hard to swallow," I am your mother you stupid child... what? Am I not meant to know things about my own child!?" her mother answers her as she begins to lose her patience. "No mum... I..." Emma tries to explain, but she simply cannot form words, "you are not sorry, you always say that, you just say that you are sorry so that you are forgiven, you don't actually mean it..." her mother interrupts Emma again. "That's not true!" Emma tires to defend herself,"Well would you look at that.... you don't know much about yourself, do you?" asks Emma's mother,"what do you mean? Why are you being so negative?" Emma asks her mother worryingly,"I am tired of being positive... ever since your father died, I could not get my peace, I tried, and tried, and tried, and tried, but nothing worked..." Emma's mother tried to explains to Emma. "W... why didn't you tell me this? We could have talked about this... mom...?" Emma tells her mom... "We can get through this mom, together, like a mother and a daughter..." Emma tells her mom as she tries to hug her. "GET AWAY FROM ME!" Emma's mother yelled,"what's wrong mom?" asks Emma,"you are the problem Emma, you!" her mother answers back,"mom? What's wrong!? What did I do?" asks Emma again, as she begins to feel sad. "Just... just forget about it...." Emma's mother tells her, "no mom, tell me, I want to help you, I want to help my mom, I don't want to lose you" Emma explains to her mom. "That's the problem Emma, I am not your mother!" Emma's mother explains to her, "what... what do you mean mom? What do you mean you are not my mother?" asks Emma as she begins to feel numb," don't you get it Emma?.." her mother asks her," no!? What are you talking about mom?"Emma asks panicked. "You are adopted... we adopted you" her mother tells her without any hesitation. "W... what?.... I....." Emma tries to speak but words just don't come out as tears roll down her face... her heart sunk like a anchor, not because she was adopted, but because she, for the first time, did not feel loved, felt as if her mother, the person she loved the most, hated her.

From all of a sudden Emma woke up to the sound of a book falling and a second later to the voice of her mother.... telling her to prepare for tomorrow she looked at her phone "it's... 8" she thought to herself. "One second" she told her mother as got up and went to the toilet to wipe her wet face with tissues. "Thank you lord that the nightmare was not real, but it... it feels real" Emma thought to herself, she put the wet tissues from her tears in the bin in the bathroom. She began to go downstairs but she turns around to look behind her back as she feels like someone is watching her... the towels were in the same place as in her nightmare, they were the exact coloured towels as in her nightmare," that must be a coincidence..." Emma thought to herself, she began to walk downstairs and she tripped on the exact same pair of shoes that she tripped in her nightmare. "Again" she things to herself "a major coincidence...". As she walks into the kitchen, she could see that her mother was wearing the exact same ap.r.o.n as in her nightmare, she used the exact same knife to cut the exact same vegetable as in her nightmare. "Come here Emma" her mother said, "this cannot be real" Emma thought to herself as she began to freak out, "okay mother" Emma says as she slowly but very consciously moves toward the kitchen, "what's for dinner mom?" asks Emma,"It's your favourite, chicken fajitas" answers Emma's mother,"is my precious hungry?" adds the mother. "Yea, I am... a bit... but mom, can... can I ask you a question?" Emma asks,"Yeah honey, what's up? Ask me" Emma's mother tells Emma. "Do you love me mom?" asks Emma,"what kind of a question is that Emma" her mother tells her,"just answer me please..." begs Emma,"yes, of course I love you, why darling? answers Emma's mother. "Am I adopted?" asks Emma, "what?" asks Emma's mother as she mishears her daughter," am I adopted?" asks Emma again. Emma's mother froze as her face became still, she looked for words... words that she can tell hear daughter... "am I?" Emma asks again...