Kapitan Sino Chapter 12

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The sun is scorching. The wind  is still. The heat of the street can be felt inside Hasmin's sari-sari store where a twenty year old, yellowing fan works like a horse. Scattered in the table attached to the wall is a 15W soldering iron and it's stand, a desoldering pump, a reel of 22swg solder that's running out, side cutters, wire strippers, small pliers and a flat blade screwdriver, heat sink, a 3mm drill bit, a small electric drill, PCB rubber used for cleaning the copper of a stripboard, a Kilometrico ballpen, a piece of paper, and crumbs of Cheezels and Chikadees that the ants are slowly feasting on. On the other side of the long table, a sweaty Rogelio nurses the sickness of a canister vacuum cleaner. He sneaks in wiping his sweat with his sleeves while holding in both hands the probes of a volt-ohm meter. Trying to remove from his mind the heat of the weather and the noise from Lunch Date screaming from Aling Precious' screaming TV.

“What date is this from? Are these four different missing people?” asked Bok-bok while looking at the newspaper where he crushes the lice picked from ET. “My, you have to start fixing this, Super Housefly! After all, it’s been a week since your last adventure and now you’re just consuming the world’s oxygen! Don’t tell me you’re having a loose bowel again or your costume’s in the drying rack?”

“What did you just call me?” Rogelio asks with a warning tone.

“Mmm…Mighty Man?”

“Do you really want me to kick your a.s.s?!”

“Cause! I’ve been trying to give you a name, and you’re the one who doesn’t want it!”

Rogelio plugs in the vacuum and turns it on. It still doesn’t work, but the engine’s making noise. “I already have a name.”

“Really?” Bok-bok’s face suddenly brightens, like a child being told a secret. “What is it?”

“Soonghkehtengk,” Rogelio mumbles shyly.

“Say what?”

Rogelio repeats his name, but it’s still said too fast and incomprehensible.

Bok-bok now stands, faces him, and holds his shoulders to shake him. “Say what? Clearly!”

Rogelio swats away his friend’s hand. “Super Strength!”

“Super…Strength?” Bok-bok’s face goes through a myriad of emotions before finally exploding in laughter. “Ahahahahahahaha! Ahahahahaha!”

“Idiot, what’s so funny?”

“Hahahahaha! Ahahahaha!” Bok-bok’s now slapping his thigh and gasping for air.

“I said it’s Super Strength!” Rogelio clears, in the hopes that his friend just heard him wrong.

Bok-bok tries to steady himself so he can speak while wiping the tears from his eyes. “What are you Pioneer Epoxy…hahahahaha! You should’ve just called yourself Latigo 501…ahahaha!” He finally falls down and rolls on the floor, laughing.

“Super strength means you have extraordinary powers. You just don’t get it, Bondying!”

Bok-bok has ran out of breath. “So…who are you again?”

“I am Super Strength!”

Bok-bok starts to drown on his own laughter once more, the fats on his body rolling like waves. “Hahahahaha!” It was in this state that he noticed that he just rolled over the tabloid spread out with all the crushed lice. “Ah, son of a—!”

Rogelio laughs, but is quickly stopped when he hears some kids playing on the road.

“Ok, you’re the gorilla…I am Captain Who…and then I’m gonna kick you…yaaaah!” The child is wearing a helmet and carpenter’s gloves in his hands while doing karate to his enemy. “Then you’re gonna fall on the people when I kick you…yaaaaah!”

Bok-bok gets up as well while dusting off his clothes to peek out to the road. He sees Rogelio’s cart,  the “I love People Power” sticker now covered by a “I love Captain Who” one. The friends look at each other. By the street corner, they spot Jong gambling, who always wore a USA for Africa t-shirt, but now is wearing a Captain Who one. The two exit the shop. Bok-bok picks with his foot some trash clogging the drainage, a small plastic cornick bag with a Kaptain Fu label. A few steps away from him, Rogelio reads the commercial of a fast food chain plastered on an electricity post: “CHOOSE FROM OUR FUN PARTY THEMES: OUTER s.p.a.cE, DINOSAUR LAND, AT THE ZOO, OR CAPTAIN WHO ADVENTURE…” Above that is another commercial: “CAPTAIN WHO TATTOO? CALL 36-17-34” And another: “CAPTAIN WHO’S EMPANADA. HOT AND GREASELESS!”

Rogelio runs back to the shop to look at the People’s Journal he bought earlier. He closes the paper being used as a table cover, and looks at the front page. Only then did he take notice of the headline: “CAPTAIN WHO TO SAVE THE DAY.” Bok-bok turns on the radio. In one pa.s.s of the AM band, they hear the name Captain Who twice, almost as much as a channel playing a Timmy Cruz song. Rogelio opens the TV and looked for a show that isn’t the “Three o’Clock Prayer.” Despite the weak reception on Channel 4 they can clearly see a turtle mascot wearing a helmet and wrapped in foil, singing: “You know me, you know me, I am one of, one of your neighbors…weeeeeh!”

Translator’s Notes:

1 – A dewormer for pigs and fighting c.o.c.ks

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