Nowhere To Be Found Chapter 4

T/N: READ LEE's STORY ‘LOVE LATE' BEFORE READING THIS AT “Chinese BL Translations[bltranslation.blogspot.com]”

Click on the reference number to scroll down to the note and back if you don't want to wait until the end, and drop a comment if they don't work right:)
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“Now I can't see anything clearly.” Those enchanting eyes of his looked at me, like a viper's fixed on a frog, “You're taking down all of my notes next cla.s.s, you hear me?!”

In the end, I ended up trading those notes with him for two skewers of grilled calamari. I even convinced myself I didn't get the short end of the stick, because the look on his face told me that the quality of these calamari sticks were much higher than the notes taken by a young master such as myself. In fact, according to him, those notes I took were so mind-numbingly incoherent, they could only be worth as much as these two bamboo skewered squids.

Actually, he shouldn't blame me. I swear, I really did try my best to write those notes, however due to the person's beside me constant fierce inspection; my performance was always exceptionally enthusiastic and sincere. That Ouyang Xiwen ah… Yes, that man had a thorough understanding of the subject, but, it was just that his characters were a bit fuzzy. So even I, with my 20/20 vision, had to also use a lot of guesswork when trying to copy those foreign characters from the black board.

Of course, there was another reason. One which I wasn't too keen on admitting to Zhuo Wenyang. You see, it was just that no matter how those twenty-six letters were arranged—to me—there was not that much of a difference I could see. So…during the process of copying, the order of those characters could…have been mistaken, or even possibly left out altogether. Thus, this was the entire reason for the issue.

Unfortunately, that exceptional snacc simply did not understand this reason; and while on our journey, my eyes widened as a light bulb went off for me.

At first, my relationship with Zhuo Wenyang should have ended there, but the situation took a distinct turn when I displayed an action to showcase my love of cleanliness——that is, by wiping the thick globs of soybean paste stuck to my hands from those grilled squids right on his clothes. Rubbing my hands earnestly until they were both clean.

Zhuo Wenyang was really too fierce, grabbing my ear on the street in front of all those people, his grip made tears want to leave my eyes, yet still he did not let go.

Was this a joke, even my mother doesn't dare do this to me.

It was a bit much.

Although…I did wipe my hands on his clothes.

He glared towards the infamous South High uniform he donned covered in stains; his eyes seeming as if they wanted to chomp someone to bits! At that time, I was still in the dark about the severity of his fastidiousness; therefore I “rightly” felt that I was the one who was wronged. With even more bystanders turning to face in our direction, I pounced on him, trying to take off his clothes as he did his best to resist me; and I did my best to take complete advantage of this chance to undo all his b.u.t.tons—in efforts to shed them. Leaving two people before the eyes of the public: one trying to strip, whilst the other kept trying to not be stripped—both—attracting a countless number of eyes. In the end, I was of course victorious, triumphantly pulling off his jacket.

Then I declared: “Zhuo Wenyang, as an apology to you, I'll take this to the dry cleaners on your behalf, okay?”

I was this much of a generous adult after all, right!

(The one who thinks wretched thoughts, is himself impure in thoughts. But that's none of my business ~~>0<>

"Xiao Jing, are you really not going to accompany me?"

That pest named, Lee, has already been droning on for a while now.

So I shot back a remark to put the issue to rest. “I'm not going. I hate foreign devil's. ”

“Come on, let's go… Eric wants to meet you.”

Haha, looks like you're finally telling the truth. Then how about I be honest to you too, yeah? “I just don't want to see Eric.”

“Xiao Jing, don't embarra.s.s me. I'll buy you whatever you want in return, alright?”

To be honest, I quite enjoy seeing Lee showing this kind of subservience, but enduring that half Chinese, half American, one called Eric was definitely more sickening.

Tonight, Lee and those business “friends” of his were going to have a fake party. Those invited were basically the people from their group, a bunch of authentic, or perhaps fake, foreign devils. And although I do like getting in on the action, I didn't like someone getting me drunk and dragging me off to bed. The party was held at Eric's Villa, that man who had so much money, he had to take it out for show; from the very first time I laid eyes on him, something just felt…off. And if it were not for my quick and clever escape, I would of already been offered up as tribute by Lee.

“My head hurts and I have a fever, don't argue with me.” I lay down on the bed and I pulled the blanket over my head.

“Xiao Jing………”

I stayed as motionless as a corpse, until I heard Lee sigh, then the shut of the door after he left. Only then did I pull the stuffy blanket off me and get up.

Those rotten men?!

Just because I'm not fussy, doesn't mean I have no principles. If they really were that thirsty, they could spend some money at a male brothel for one, right! After sh.e.l.ling out four figures, what kind of quality product would there not be for them to chose from, not to mention, the thorough service they'd provide with no need for clean up.

My mood was way less than good, so now I craved a cigarette. Recalling that day where I obeyed Lee by properly hiding that pack inside my school bag. I rummaged around for a while but found nothing, so I simply lifted the bag by it's bottom and shook every single thing in it—out. A messy pile of random things (you know, except for books) fell on the bed: my condoms, a crumpled ball of change, along with some other garbage; and I still did not find that pack of cigarettes I remember opening inside it. What I did see however, was a receipt for the dry cleaners.

Dry-cleaning?

I suddenly remembered, it was for Zhuo Wenyang's uniform that I still haven't given him back as yet! It had been so long since then, and that guy didn't even call to ask me for it.

Staring at the ceiling out of sheer boredom for a good while, I then decided to go look for that handsome fella to relieve my boredom.

“h.e.l.lo, Aunty,” I showed up on the Zhuo family's doorstep on a dark and windy night, facing a beautiful middle-aged woman with the most lovely and charming smile, who had come to open the door. “I came to find Wenyang~”

“Oh, Wenyang is taking a bath, so you'll have to wait a bit.”

Sitting on the living room's couch, I absentmindedly listened to Mama Zhuo's excessively eager prattling on about stuff to me, but there was only one sentence my ears hung onto. Oh? He's taking a shower, is he~~

So that guy is not wearing any clothes, hmmmm~~

My brain automatically conjured up an image of the usual Zhuo Wenyang and began stripping off those clothes of his. Not only was this image of him three dimensional, it also captured every single angle, as well as close up views.

“Xiao Yang, a cla.s.smate of yours came to find you.”

Using a towel to dry his hair as he walked into the living room, that man then stopped in his tracks, suspiciously gazing at me with those smoldering hazy nearsighted eyes of his as he came towards me.

I whistled madly inside my head. Seriously, who would of thought this guy had such s.e.xy side~~

What is called again, ‘Regretting only knowing a little when you need it'. Well, right now, this refers precisely to me . All those remnants of the verses of poetry used to describe all those beautiful men and women twirling in my head, were each still insufficient to describe even a tenth of the male beauty standing before me. Perfectly textured hair dripping with water as half of its strands clung to his face; fair skin, which because of the steam rising from its surface, resembled a cheery blossom in full bloom; and as far as the eyes can see, a pale face, rosy lips, bright eyes and white teeth. The cruelest part of it all was, that despite looking like this, he still gave off an air of masculinity which was completely—not to the slightest degree—effeminate. Seeing those open pajamas, I couldn't help but want to reach out and touch the contents within them.

“Why are you here?”

Uwaah… Even his voice is magnetic~~

My expression was probably no different than that of a drooling idiot, so he just stared at me, and quite oddly at that.

“I came to find you so you can tutor me~~”

The look on his face was sinister: “It's ten o'clock at night right now…”

“Oh, then…actually, I'm here to return your clothes.”

He silently took the bag from my hands, saying thank you, before turning around and entering his room.

As brazen as I am, of course I would do as he did and follow him inside.

“Come on, it's late and I need to get to bed.” His expression revealing he was left with no other option than to plead.

Heheh. I'm like a big bad wolf approaching a little rabbit.

“But I have a question about an English problem I need to ask you.” I said this because I knew Zhuo Wenyang had always placed first in our grade for English.()

He raked his hands through his hair vexedly; but nonetheless walked over towards the table then stood before it, pulling out a chair, indicating for me to sit: “Hurry up and ask the question about the subject.”

“It's the uh… uhm…” I chuckled once I recalled I didn't even bring half of my books over. Why're you asking me, huh!”

“Is it about the mock exam paper Mr. Ouyang sent out last time?”

Huh? Was that a thing?

Of course… I laughed brilliantly at once: “Yeah, yeah, that's it!”

He then, from a huge blue examination folder, pulled out an unimaginably pristine test paper and placed it before me: “Which question?”

“Uh………………” I stared at that exam paper—in shock. “You finished it?”

“Yeah.” He nodded calmly, “This exam paper was very easy, most people scored over 80%.”

Well fancy that… I always thought that getting full marks was something that was only possible in primary school.

“Which of these questions are you unable to do?”

“All of them.” Even though I only looked at that test paper indirectly, I nonetheless knew my answer was the simple truth.

He, with an expression of wanting to faint, took a pencil from his pencil cup: “Here, let's look at the first one. This question's syntax is actually not so different from the sixth question, so if you can solve this first one, you'll be able to solve them both. Look here…”

Again, I swore I was listening to his words quite earnestly.

But, their content was an entirely different matter.

With that super-s.e.xy voice in the background, my mind started to race as it if were starting to soar; gazing from his perfectly sorrowful face, down to his neck, further to his faintly discernible chest, then to his waist, before traveling up that same route to return to the start. In the past, this kind of journey was the normal thorough search, absolutely not letting even half an inch of skin get by, looking through to clearly see the innate characteristics is the objective; exposing that thing's true features is the goal…

After that, I stupidly gazed at his tall, straight nose; pondering about what is said regarding the huge correlation between the appearance of a man's nose with that place of his. I wonder… what kind of appearance does his place have…… Suddenly, I heard him yell: “Lin Jing!!”

“Yes!” I replied quickly.

“You haven't heard one word I said, have you!!”

“Yes!” Just having returned to reality, all I could do was issue that one syllable response. I guessed that if he also asked me “Are you right in the head?!” I'd probably shout out “Yes!” as well.

“What I just explained, I want you repeat back to me. Why should you not choose ‘B' for this question?”

Oh, this kind of malicious questioning tactic was definitely learned from Ouyang Xiwen.

“Because ‘B' is wrong!” I confidently.

He stared at me, furious, and I also tried my best to respond to his expression.

After a while, he weakly bowed his head: “Forget it. Seeing that you don't have any drive left, this will be enough for tonight. We'll leave the rest for tomorrow and go over it again at school, alright?”

Huh? Is this me being shown the door?

I put on an act as I took up my bag pack: “Wenyang, what time is it now? Can I still even get a bus?”

Being able to catch it in time is just my hidden plan, since I just came here on the last bus.

He hesitated, brows scrunching: “It's late… I'll walk you out to the street and call a taxi, alright.”

“No!” I stepped backwards in a panic, “From your house here to my own will be a lot of money, it's too expensive, I… I'll just walk back, okay.”

Those beautiful brows of his knitted.

Right at this extremely dangerous moment, knocks sounded beyond the door. It was Mama Zhuo, who's voice to me sounded like a heavenly choir: “Xiao Yang, it's not safe to let you cla.s.smate go back this late. Why don't you let him call his family and he'll stay here tonight, alright?”

In my heart, I was screaming wildly: h.e.l.l Yes, yet my face remained sincerely regretful and uneasy: “This… this would be too much trouble, don't you think…”

He sighed again, accepting his fate, raking his fingers through his hair: “Go wash up, I'll give you some pajamas.”

When I heard him slowly approach the bedside, I stealthily hid my laughter under the blanket—laughter that was simply: wicked~

“Good night~” after he lifted the blanket and laid down beside me, I sang.

“Good… night,” He paused for a while, before responding stiffly.

Lights turned off. Two men squeezed into a not so wide bed, among them, one was gay~~~

I thought long and hard about this opportunity which was not easy to come by, yet somehow I got it, so shouldn't I eat as much tofu as possible? Being right at his side, a hand—deliberately—resting itself on his waist.

He shook, but he did not move; still sleeping with his back turned to me.

Wow, Zhuo Wenyang. I, Lin Jing, taking the initiative just now was mostly to give you face. There are a lot of people who want it but can't ask for it, yet you only react this much? You have this rare divine beauty lying beside you, and you're not going to do anything—can you still call yourself a man?! (At that instance, I automatically ignored him not being gay; and that him having no interest towards a similar to him, flat-chested, grown-a.s.s man—was a fact!)

“Wenyang~~” I whispered beside his ear. My breath control quite skilled; the aim being to blow and tickle his core—not to pant like an ox.

“What is it now?” He wasn't fooled at all—he didn't even turn back.

“Turn around, okay? I have something to tell you.”

I could see he was nervous. I really wasn't going to do anything to him, you know, I just wanted to tease him.

He really turned around.

And at that moment of turning, his lips had brushed against my own.

“What's the matter?” he lifted his head up slightly, asking calmly.

The muscles of my face stiffened: “It's nothing.” I quickly turned my back to him.

Just…just now, that instant where his lips b.u.mped into to my own……had a spark, making my heart tremble. I pressed my hands over my chest, feeling that my own heart was still beating wildly.

Seriously, why isn't this going anywhere. I grumbled as I shut my eyes. Hearing him move behind me, his leg touching my own, with me then quickly curling them up.

My body… When did it become this sensitive?

I held my knees, wanting to fall asleep, but my not often clever brain unexpectedly having the English phrase “Out of Control” pop up.

Out of control…utterly out of control.

…Inside my body it seemed like that place where the brakes were, in that instant, broke.

I suddenly sensed danger.

In the morning, when I got up, I noticed a work schedule stuck to the head of the bed; on top, the time for sleep marked out as ten o'clock.

So it turns out Zhuo Wenyang belongs to that group of people who are punctual. So no wonder my bothering him until late and him climbing into bed back then had his face be so p.i.s.sy.

“Morning, Auntie.” Half of that sweet tone of mine was directed towards the pretty-good-looking breakfast spread on the table.

“Lin Jing, come have some breakfast.” His mother's att.i.tude towards me, compared to his, was a good few degrees higher. Before, Lee had said to me that I can't pretend to be refined and polite to others. But I can't deal with that guy, Wenyang. Dealing with Obasan will be good enough.

[T/n: Obasan, j.a.panese for Aunt, a polite term used to also refer to an older woman]

I swaggered over, took a seat and began to enjoy the meal, but upon seeing Zhuo Wenyang come over, my lips became fixed in place.

On those days where the temperature got too high, the uniform jacket wasn't worn, so he simply wore the white dress shirt, with its hem neatly tucked within the uniform's slacks. Such a change for other people, would just be a mere common way of dressing; and in this decade, the only ones who still tucked in their shirts in were farmers and World War II 8th Route war veterans. But on him, it just looked handsome; wide shoulders and a narrow b.u.t.t, a slim waist and long legs—if there were just a bit more height on him, it would be exactly like the figure of a fashion model.

I looked at him with a fixed gaze, wondering exactly how could a person wearing just ordinary clothes be so eye-catching—so d.a.m.n striking, and why the h.e.l.l have I been spending all that money on brand-name goods?

If it weren't for my being gay, right now, I would be consumed with jealousy that could birth a deep seated bitter hatred towards him.

When my wondering mind returned, I took a sip of milk to cover me as I wiped away some drool, then I suddenly realized something was wrong.

As soon as I mentioned it, I realised what was originally a small wrong something, turned into a big one!

“He's not here,” Zhuo Wenyang's tone let me know better than to dare ask. In the end, was he no longer in this world, is he just not at home, or is it…something else.

Of course, I really wanted to know.

But even if other people's business came looking for me, I was too lazy to ask, except for Zhuo Wenyang's.

“My parents are divorced.” On those rare days where I attended cla.s.s, during the break between lessons, he'd often mumble to himself like this; and I who was being lulled to sleep by the chemistry teacher's incoherent babbling, suddenly sobered up.

“Huh?” my mind stopped turning, as I stared blankly with no idea what to say.

“It was quite a long time ago. I don't feel any way about it. But it's just that when my mother remembers that man, she'll still get sad.”

“So don't mention him when your in front my mom. He didn't want me either, so when he left I had to go with her, because that man has everything and has no need for anything else, but my mother… my mom has nothing without me. He's still responsible, which means every month he pays alimony and visits me once a year. So he's not that bad of a person, okay. That's all there is.”

While Wenyang spoke, his eyes never left the practice sheet in front of him, his hand holding onto the pen so tightly it seemed as if he were wholeheartedly trying to solve the problem. He spoke with great urgency, very suddenly, and also very simply. Obviously he was unwilling to share any more, but I was happy nonetheless. Having him share this secret he hadn't with any others, gave me a sense of superiority.

“My parents are both still around. But being together seems like an appointment, even if it's me. Having parents like that is no different than not having any.” I seemed just like kid who was eager to show loyalty, trustworthiness as well as their indestructible friendship by taking out my own secret to exchange with a little pal, “I really want to leave, but I want them to still give me spending money; I'm not really cared for one bit. You're still lucky, at least someone cares about you; unlike me, whose father doesn't care, whose mother doesn't love, and has no one who treats them seriously.”

He stared at me, chuckling: “It's not like that.”

In the end, I still couldn't figure out what he meant; was he saying that talking to my parents like that was still better than nothing, or was he saying if they divorce it's impossible for me to not care; or perhaps, he was saying that I still have people who love me.

……………………………………….

Notes:

“Lights turned off. Two men squeezed into a not so wide bed, among them, one was gay~~~” [iana: since “gay” here was said said in English(it usually is said in English btw) I'm interpreting this one as ‘happy' because, this sneaky lil' b.a.s.t.a.r.d was indeed very happy.]

洋鬼子: lit. Foreign devils. Foreigners.
(doesn't it sound like the name of a sports team, I'm already imagining a mascot ?)

书到用时方恨少: To regret only knowing a little when you need it. (Because you didn't learn it when you had the time to do so.)

大灰狼和小白兔: the big bad wolf and the rabbit (lit. Big grey wolf and little white rabbit) is a story about a mamma rabbit who left her three kittens (baby rabbits) home alone while she went out to get food, warning them to not open the door to strangers. Then a big bad wolf shows up, knocks on the door but the little rabbits didn't open up. Eventually their mom came back, sang their secret song, so the bunnies opened the door for their mother, like the good kittens they were. But, unbeknownst to them, that sneaky wolf was hiding close by and heard the tune; so the next day, when mama rabbit went out, he snuck by and sang the song. One of the bunnies, eager to great Mom, rushed to open the door but his (brother) stopped him, saying it wasn't their mother's voice. In the end, the wolf gave up, Mama came home, and was proud of her obedient and clever children.

Tl;Dr: Sneaky big bad wolf tries to trick innocent little bunny, and fails.

八路: Eight Route (Army). This just seems like an offhanded way to say the only ones who tuck in their shirts are folks who don't keep up with trends(farmers/countryfolk) and those who are reaaaaally old (WW2 war vets).