It's Not Easy Being Mean Part 11

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Kemp Hurley/7th Duh-livia checked. Duh-livia checked.

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Doug Landsman/7th Layne, Meena, and Heather checked. Layne, Meena, and Heather checked.

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Jake Shapiro/7th 1. Skye kissed him. 1. Skye kissed him.

2. "Kick-b.u.t.t smile"- dad owns Brite Smile franchise.

Dylan Dylan Your teeth have been yellowing. Want to talk to his dad. Then go to the "bathroom" and check under his mattress. Your teeth have been yellowing. Want to talk to his dad. Then go to the "bathroom" and check under his mattress.

Josh Hotz/7th 1. Skye kissed him (but he didn't kiss her back). 1. Skye kissed him (but he didn't kiss her back).

2. "'Glamour-don't' style"-100% Polo.

Alicia Alicia Went to an RL sample sale and got him something. You want to display it and need a few minutes in his room alone to set up the surprise. Went to an RL sample sale and got him something. You want to display it and need a few minutes in his room alone to set up the surprise.

Grier Biggs/8th 1. Skye kissed him. 1. Skye kissed him.

2. "Loves all creatures, big and small"-his last name is Biggs.

Alicia Alicia You heard his room was voted coolest boy's room by some of the 8th-grade girls and you want to see its winning qualities. You heard his room was voted coolest boy's room by some of the 8th-grade girls and you want to see its winning qualities.

Lowell Kotz/8th 1. Skye kissed him. 1. Skye kissed him.

2. "All creatures, big and small"-had head lice and saved them in a jar.

Alicia Alicia You want to see his lice. It's research for your science-fair project on bad-hair days. You want to see his lice. It's research for your science-fair project on bad-hair days.

Andy Wolden/8th 1. Skye kissed him. 1. Skye kissed him.

2. "Rode off into the sunset together"- gave Skye a ride on his BMX bike before last year's Valentine's Day dance.

Alicia Alicia You heard he had cool bike posters in his bedroom and are seriously into BMX-ing ever since you saw that episode of You heard he had cool bike posters in his bedroom and are seriously into BMX-ing ever since you saw that episode of Made Made on MTV where Warwick taught that blond actress girl how to ride a BMX bike. on MTV where Warwick taught that blond actress girl how to ride a BMX bike.

Ezra Rosenberg/8th 1. Skye kissed him2. "Into the some things as me"-loves mini golf. Had a mini-golf birthday party. 1. Skye kissed him2. "Into the some things as me"-loves mini golf. Had a mini-golf birthday party.

Kristen Kristen You want help practicing on your golf swing because all athletes take up golf at some point in their lives. You want help practicing on your golf swing because all athletes take up golf at some point in their lives.

Oliver Smalls/8th 1. Skye kissed him. 1. Skye kissed him.

2. "Loves all creatures, big and small"-his last name is Smalls.

Alicia Alicia Someone saw him stealing your cell phone. He will ahb-viously deny this, but tell him you don't believe him and you want to check his room. Someone saw him stealing your cell phone. He will ahb-viously deny this, but tell him you don't believe him and you want to check his room.

Cody Hill/8rh 1. Skye kissed him. (Ew! Not sure why. Maybe she lost a bet.)2. That's all. Other than that he's a total LBR. 1. Skye kissed him. (Ew! Not sure why. Maybe she lost a bet.)2. That's all. Other than that he's a total LBR.

Dylan Dylan Say anything. He is such an LBR he will be happy you want to hang out with him. Say anything. He is such an LBR he will be happy you want to hang out with him.

Geoff Michaels/8th 1. Skye kissed him. 1. Skye kissed him.

2. "All creatures, big ant small" and "into the same things as me"- gets rides to school in a Mini Cooper.

Kristen Kristen You want to see his regional spelling bee award. You think spelling is hawt. You want to see his regional spelling bee award. You think spelling is hawt.

Luis Ruiz/8rh 1. Skye kissed him. 1. Skye kissed him.

2. "Age doesn't matter-he's really 11 but skipped two grades.

Dylan Dylan You want to see where he does his homework. You want to see where he does his homework.

P.J. Jeffries/8th 1. Skye kissed him. 1. Skye kissed him.

2. "Rode off into the sunset together"-their parents are BFFs and took them on the Circle Line cruise around NYC during sunset last spring.

Kristen Kristen You want to interview him for a paper you are writing about people who are named after girls' pajamas. (You ore also interviewing Teddy Stark and Cami Logan.) You want to interview him for a paper you are writing about people who are named after girls' pajamas. (You ore also interviewing Teddy Stark and Cami Logan.) Billy Williams/8th 1. Skye kissed him. 1. Skye kissed him.

2. Another LBR. Not sure why she kissed him. Possibly a game of spin-the-bottle.

Dylan Dylan You like his red hair and think you may be related. Must discuss in private. (Wear gloves when touching his mattress. He smells like calamine lotion, which may indicate a rash.) You like his red hair and think you may be related. Must discuss in private. (Wear gloves when touching his mattress. He smells like calamine lotion, which may indicate a rash.) Lee Chan/8th 1. Skye kissed him. 1. Skye kissed him.

2. "Loves all creatures, big and small"-has a ma.s.sive Shrek doll in his bedroom. His father worked on the movie.

Kristen Kristen You want to get your picture taken with Shrek. You want to get your picture taken with Shrek.

Harris Fisher/H.S.

1. Skye kissed him. 1. Skye kissed him.

2. "Next time it will be forever." She is in love with Harris, according to Claire.

Ma.s.sie, Claire, Dylan, and Alicia. Ma.s.sie, Claire, Dylan, and Alicia.

Claire, Dylan, and Alicia get soccer tips from Cam while Ma.s.sie searches Harris's room. Claire, Dylan, and Alicia get soccer tips from Cam while Ma.s.sie searches Harris's room.

Liam Barrett/H.S.

1. Skye kissed him. 1. Skye kissed him.

2. "We rode off into the sunset together"- he drives Skye home on his Vespa.

Alicia Alicia You want a ride on his Vespa but first you have to change into your Vespa outfit (in his bedroom, of course). You want a ride on his Vespa but first you have to change into your Vespa outfit (in his bedroom, of course).

Yuri b.u.t.terman (aka Yuri b.u.t.t-Man)/H.S.

1. Skye kissed him. 1. Skye kissed him.

2. "Into the same things as me"-majorly into dancing (ballroom).

Alicia Alicia You need to practice with a tall male partner. You need to practice with a tall male partner.

"Why am I the operative on so many?" Alicia whined.

"Look down," Ma.s.sie insisted.

Alicia lowered her head, practically resting her chin on her ample cleavage.

"Oh."

"If our tactics don't get your into their bedrooms, those will."

Alicia folded her arms across her chest while Dylan and Kristen cracked up.

Bzzzzzzz.

Ma.s.sie, Alicia, Dylan, Kristen, and Claire checked their phones.

"It's me." Claire jiggled her cell. "It's a text message from my agent," she announced, hoping one of them would ask her how her meeting had gone. Instead, they all returned to their doc.u.ments. She scrolled down to Miles's message, which said: Remember, runaways don't eat.

It was the fifth one she'd gotten from him in the last three hours.

After another moment of fake reading, Claire worked up the nerve to suggest the unsuggestable. "So, um, here's an idea." Adjusting her black oversize sungla.s.ses, she gazed into the distance as if considering this for the very first time. "Maybe we should b.u.mp the Harris Fisher visit to next week."

"Why would we make Harris later? later?" Ma.s.sie countered. "If anything, we'd want to go there sooner."

"Uh, you know, so we can check out some of these other guys first." She shook the list for effect.

Everyone giggled.

"Kuh-laire, you must must be poor." be poor."

"Why?"

"Cuz you're not making any any cents." cents."

Dylan spit out a mouthful of Diet Dr Pepper.

Kristen cackled. "I love that one!"

"Me too." Alicia smacked the gray-and-aubergine Indian wool blanket around her legs. Surrounded by the Blocks' rustic-chic leather furniture and lit by the orange glow of the fire, all she needed was a huge turquoise necklace to look like an exotic model in a Ralph Lauren catalogue.

Claire clenched her fists, resisiting the urge to beat herself senseless. She had rehea.r.s.ed her argument a million times on the car ride back from Manhattan. Why did she have to say the one thing that defied all logic?

"Kuh-laire, what's this really really about?" Ma.s.sie finally looked at her. "Is something bothering you?" She sounded like a concerned friend. And Claire couldn't help wondering if this was Ma.s.sie's way of apologizing for not asking about her meeting with Miles. Maybe she had heard the pain in Claire's voice and opted to put their friendship before this stupid key contest. And if that was the case, the least Claire could do was return the gesture with a little honesty. about?" Ma.s.sie finally looked at her. "Is something bothering you?" She sounded like a concerned friend. And Claire couldn't help wondering if this was Ma.s.sie's way of apologizing for not asking about her meeting with Miles. Maybe she had heard the pain in Claire's voice and opted to put their friendship before this stupid key contest. And if that was the case, the least Claire could do was return the gesture with a little honesty.

"I have an audition Friday night."

"For what?" Dylan stuffed a handful of Smartfood in her mouth. "Nicole Richie's understudy?"

"Yeah, what's with that getup?" Alicia giggled.

"Wait." Ma.s.sie held up her palm, obviously ordering them to let Claire finish. "Go awn."

"Bernard Sinrod wants me to star in his new movie, Princess n.o.body, Princess n.o.body, with guess who?" with guess who?"

No one said a word.

"Give up?" Claire tried.

Still they were silent.

"Cole Sprouse!"

She waited for their screams.

"Whatevs. Dylan's cuter," said Dylan.

"They're identical twins," Kristen insisted.

"Well, his name name is cuter." is cuter."

What is wrong with you guys? I'm up for a major movie and all you care about is which Sprouse is cuter? Claire wanted to shout. Instead, she fell back on the couch and lowered the brim of her plaid hat. Claire wanted to shout. Instead, she fell back on the couch and lowered the brim of her plaid hat.

"So you're saying you want us to change our our plans with Cam, the ones plans with Cam, the ones you you set up, so you can go to your movie audition?" Ma.s.sie bobbed her bare feet in anger. set up, so you can go to your movie audition?" Ma.s.sie bobbed her bare feet in anger.

"Yeah," Claire tried.

"Puh-lease! When are you going to realize this has nothing nothing to do with you and Cam and to do with you and Cam and everything everything to do with our eighth-grade alphaness?" to do with our eighth-grade alphaness?"

Nervously, Claire folded the hem of her camo skirt. "I-"

"It's chaos out there, Kul-laire. Kay-aw-ssss!" Ma.s.sie pointed to the floor-to-ceiling windows. "While you were lunching with Planet Hollywood, every girl in our grade has been trying to score an invite to Cam's."

"Who?" Claire shot forward. "Why didn't anyone tell me?"