If You Don't Go To Hell, Who Will? Chapter 23

September 17, 2019miumiu596

The hero saves the beauty

( no . . it’s not the hero and the beauty you are thinking of…miumiu)

Since I had slept with my head directly under the fan, when I woke up the next morning, my head was heavy and I had a slight temperature . I had caught a cold . I was embarra.s.sed and sad at my ability to catch a cold in the heat of summer .

So I had to stay in the base camp as I watched the rest of the people drift away in boats .
Zhong Yuan elected to stay with me  because he needed to sort out all the data we had gathered so far . He forced me to drink cold medication, although I insisted the medicine was not something any human could drink . But he threatened me by saying I would not be allowed to eat watermelon unless I had my medicine . This person was really too inhuman .

After drinking the medicine, I took half a watermelon, and used a small spoon to scoop the pieces as I watched Zhong Yuan work . It was so cool to relax while other people were working !

Unfortunately, when Zhong Yuan raised his head and opened his mouth, I had no choice but to feed him a large scoop of watermelon . I was tempted to throw the whole watermelon  at him, but it was a pity that I lacked the courage to do so .

The cook soon joined us and started chatting . After a bit, he asked us, “ So when are you guys getting married?”

I nearly choked on the watermelon . The cook had really weird thoughts ! Zhong Yuan calmly raised his head and smiled at the cook . He replied, “ We aren’t planning to get married anytime soon . ”

I sighed . Zhong Yuan had clearly missed the point . His answer would send the wrong message to the cook . So I took it upon myself to clarify matters . I wiped my mouth and spoke, “ Umm …actually…we aren’t in the kind of relationship you are thinking of…”

The cook snorted disdainfully . It seemed that he was completely disregarding my clarification, and I was disheartened .

Zhong Yuan brought his mouth close to my ear and whispered, “ Do you know why I didn’t clarify matters with him?”

Seeing this, the cook coughed twice and said, “ I won’t disturb you guys”, and walked away, leaving me fuming in silence . I realised then that it was impossible to clarify the things between me and Zhong Yuan . May be the only way left was for either of us to get a girlfriend or boyfriend .

I evaluated these two options in my mind and decided getting Zhong Yuan a girlfriend was easier . After all, this kid was quite attractive . There were many girls who liked him . Even the girl in the soy sauce shop was smitten with him . But why did Zhong Yuan not have a girlfriend? Although we had never talked about this, we were almost ‘ inseparable’ . If he had someone, I would have discovered her by now .

I suddenly remembered the book called “ Love Psychology” that Zhong Yuan used to read in the library . Then I remembered how, with uncharacteristic shyness and softness, he had invited Miss Fourth to this trip . Then, then… . .

I almost blurted out my conclusion . I placed my hand under my chin and thought for a while before asking Zhong Yuan seriously , “ Zhong Yuan, how about you help me with Lu Zujian, and I will help you with Miss Fourth?”

Zhong Yuan slammed his hand on the keyboard and stopped typing . He turned his face and looked at me in astonishment, “ What are you talking about ? “
There was a dangerous going in his eyes . I interpreted this as his anger with my discovery of his secret . So I patted his shoulder and continued generously, “ In fact, I know you are interested in Miss Fourth . She is also quite suitable for you . Oh, don’t worry about me knowing . . ha ha …”
Zhong Yuan started at me strangely . Then suddenly, he pushed me to the floor and leaned over my body . He stared at me as he bowed his head, his face gradually moving closer to mine .

I was shocked, I had no idea what was going on in this kid’s head . Was he worried about me knowing his deep, dark thoughts ? Although I privately did not think Miss Fourth was interested in him, but with time . .

I tried to push myself up from the floor, but he pressed back my shoulder . Then he looked at me coldly, “ I am not interested in Miss Fourth, and there is no possibility of you and Lu Zijian getting together . ”

I wasn’t sure whether it was his words or his cold temperament that scared me . In short, I was stunned and managed to stammer in a silly manner, “ Why…why ?”

At this moment, the door of the living room was pushed open and the cook came in and asked me , “ Little Mu, what would you like to eat tonight …” . He stopped talking abruptly and quickly closed the door . Then he coughed twice and said, “ I’m sorry, you guys carry on…”

It was then that I realised our position was a bit ambiguous . I pushed Zhong Yuan away and got up from the floor . Then I said to him, “ Please behave . ”
“ Behave?” Zhong Yuan repeated my words and suddenly laughed, “ Idiot!”

I stared at him . Zhong Yuan was really unpredictable . Just now, he was so annoyed with the perceived breach of his privacy . Now he was laughing . Was he happy because I was embarra.s.sed? This person was really bad .

……

As we chatted before going to bed, I realised that today the occupants of the boats had not been redistributed . This meant that Lu Zijian and Miss Fourth had been alone on the boat for the whole day !
I pulled Miss Fourth’s arm and asked her, “ Did you bully Lu Zijian?”
She shrugged off my hand impatiently and said, “ No . ”
Li’l second smiled, “ Of course not, Lu Zijian even helped her pick up lotus plants . When we were coming back, a big dog chased Miss Fourth . Lu Zijian was very proactive and stood in front of her to protect her . Then he drove the dog away . The hero saved the beauty!“

The more I listened to this story, the more agitated I was . I was supposed to be alone with Lu Zijian . I was supposed to be rescued by him . This is what I had dreamed of . How did this beautiful thing happen to Miss Fourth instead ? This was too wasteful . With Miss Fourth’s skill, why would she need Lu Zijian to save her ? She could  kick any creature to death , and if needed, she could be the hero that saved Brother Lu… .

Boss realised what was going through my head . She patted my head and said gently, “ Blockhead three, don’t think about Lu Zijian, you’ve already been implanted firmly in Zhong Yuan’s life . ”

I was speechless .

And I was even more depressed .

……

The next day, we rested for the whole day . The boys went to buy the train tickets home . I was bored with two days of rest and started the discussion on the walnut tree in the backyard .

There was a large walnut tree in Lu Zijian’s backyard . In it’s natural habitat , walnuts were actually wrapped with a green peel . What we normally found in the shops was the core of the fruit . Since some of the guys were from the city, they had never seen the walnut fruit . So when I told them that these fruits were actually walnuts, they did not believe me . Miss Fourth, especially, refused to believe what I said and called me an idiot .

This annoyed me no end and I decided to pluck a few from the tree and peel it to show her the familiar nut .
The tree was quite tall and I held the trunk with my bare hands as I pulled myself up . My two greatest strengths were climbing a tree and scaling a wall . Although the tree was quite tall and the bark was slippery, I found it quite easy to climb up .

When Miss Fourth saw me climb up easily, even she caught the spirit of adventure and attempted to climb the tree . She hugged the trunk and tried to pull herself up . At first glance, it was obvious that this kid was an amateur . Fortunately,she was quite agile, so she managed to climb up a little . I sat on a higher branch and grinned down at her . To be honest, Miss Fourth was smart and compet.i.tive, and I seldom got the upper hand . So I felt a bit proud .

Miss Fourth held the branch and swore to overtake me .

Just at this moment, someone shouted at her from under the tree, “ What are you doing ? Come down ! “
I looked down . The guys who had gone to buy the tickets were back . Zhong Yuan was the one who was shouting .

Miss Fourth was already struggling to hold on . When Zhong Yuan shouted, she was startled and lost her balance . Immediately, she fell down from the tree . My heart sank at the impending disaster . Miss Fourth was a few metres above ground and a fall would likely lead to a few broken bones at the very least . At this critical moment, someone came forward and neatly caught Miss Fourth in his arms . Miss Fourth recovered from her shock and looked with astonishment and grat.i.tude at the person who had saved her . The two pairs of eyes met, and there was a burning emotion in them… .

I sat in the tree and cried without tears . The person who had come to the rescue was again Lu Zijian . Heavens, this was too cruel . Why were the things that were supposed to happen to me happening with Miss Fourth instead? My dream hero was saving the beauty again and again, and the heroine was Miss Fourth again and again … .

I sat heartbroken, when I heard Zhong Yuan shout again, “ Be careful Mu er . ”
He startled me, and if I weren’t holding on the branch steadily, I would have fallen like Miss Fourth . Zhong Yuan realised I was annoyed and was very happy, “ Idiot, are you trying to jump straight down ? “

I glanced at Zhong Yuan and slipped down . I turned back to see Lu Zijian carefully place Miss Fourth down, then patted her shoulder . What a beautiful picture! Alas, I was only a bystander .
Zhong Juan poked my head and said, “ How old are you to be climbing a tree ? “

I ignored him and spoke to Lu Zijian instead, “ Student Lu, please tell Miss Fourth that this is actually a walnut tree . “

Lu Zijian looked at Miss Fourth and realised that she was very convinced I was wrong . Therefore, our Brother Lu, who was always known to be honest and kind, decided to be neither this time .
“ I don’t know what tree this is . ”

I shed tears . Big brother, who are you? You have lived here for ten years and you don’t know what tree this is? Even if you want to side with Miss Fourth, you don’t need to label a deer as a horse !

So because Lu Zijian lied, Miss Fourth was able to save face . She glanced at me smugly and left . Lu Zijian apologised and whispered to me, “ Sorry, this is a walnut tree” .

After that, he hurriedly followed Miss Fourth .
I wiped my sweat . Big brother,what is the point in telling me this now ?

Boss squeezed my cheeks and Li’l second b.u.mped my chin . Pa.s.serby A and Pa.s.serby B sighed in unison .

I walked next to Zhong Yuan . He looked at the two figures in front and said, “ So you think the two of them look good together ? “

I was annoyed . Whether they looked good together or not was none of his business .

Zhong Yuan raised his head and smiled . “ Even if you don’t think so, these two look good together . “

I cried without tears .